Full Circle (52 page)

“You know what’s so amazing?” He touched the
side of his forehead to hers.

“What?” She turned slightly toward him.

“I spent two hours with Carol and Antonio.
Two hours getting to know them and their adorable little girl,
Krissy. And she
is
adorable.” He smiled, and Karma smiled
with him. “But in two hours, we released so much
leftover . . .” He paused, searching for the right
word. “Guilt,” he said a moment later. “Guilt and regret and
shame.” He sighed. “If only we’d talked years ago. If only she and
I had faced all this a long time ago, maybe you and I wouldn’t have
gone through so much hell.”

She pulled away and turned to face him.
“Mark, I wouldn’t trade a moment of what we’ve shared.”

He frowned. How could she say that about the
roller coaster ride of their relationship? He hadn’t made things
easy for her. He’d hurt her, left her, made her feel inferior.

“Karma—”

“Sshh.” She pushed her way onto his lap,
placing her warm, wet hand on his cheek. “We wouldn’t be who we are
today—as a couple, I mean—if any one thing about our time together
had been different.”

“But I almost lost you. Twice. I let you go
after falling in love with you.” The backs of his eyes prickled. He
wasn’t used to showing his feelings, but the last twenty-four hours
had tapped out his emotional stamina. “It’s only by the grace of
God I got you back. And then Friday . . . I thought
you were gone. I thought I’d lost you for good. I—”

She placed her wet, lavender-scented
fingertips over his lips. “You never lost me.”

He blinked several times, searching her eyes.
He’d won the lottery when he’d found Karma. She was the most
remarkable, most understanding, most forgiving woman he’d ever
known aside from his mom.

“I love you,” she said. “I’ve never stopped
loving you. In the year you were gone, I tried to, but I couldn’t.
You were everywhere I looked. You were in my every thought. Even
when I was with Brad, it was you I saw when I kissed him. You I
felt when he touched me. It was
always
you.” She rested her
forehead against his, closing her eyes. The gesture made his heart
swell, full of love and honor . . . peace. “And
Friday . . .” He wanted to put Friday behind them,
probably as much as she did. “Friday’s in the past.” She slid her
arms around his shoulders as he wrapped his around the small of her
back. “We don’t have to have a big, fancy wedding. I just want you,
Mark. However I can have you. We can go to the Justice of the
Peace. We can go to Vegas. We can wear jeans and T-shirts for all I
care. If that makes it easier for you, then let’s do that. Let’s
not make this a big deal, because all that matters is that I love
you. Who cares about a big fancy wedding with a big expensive cake
and—”

“I do.”

She abruptly halted and pushed away. “What?”
Her eyebrows furrowed, wrinkling the skin over the bridge of her
nose.

He brushed his palms up her arms. “I care,
Karma.” He had no interest in diminishing their
wedding . . . or putting it off any longer. “I
want
the big wedding. I
want
the big, expensive,
overly flamboyant cake. I want the church. I want a dozen
bridesmaids and a dozen groomsmen if that’s what you want. I want
to stand at the head of the aisle, in front of God and everyone, as
I wait to become your husband. I want to lose my breath when I see
you in your wedding dress for the first time. I want to see you
smile under your veil in that way you do that makes my heart beat
just a little harder. And I want to say vows with you and dance
with you at our reception. With
you
, Karma. I want to dance
with you and cherish you for the rest of our lives. Will you let me
do that?”

As he revealed his heart, Karma’s eyes misted
over, her tears balancing on her lower rims as she covered her
mouth with one hand and nodded.

“Is that a yes, Miss Mason?”

She let out a tender sob and threw her arms
around his shoulders. “Yes.”

He held her for what felt like a very long
time but not nearly long enough. Then he pushed her back, helped
her from the tub, and dried her off before wrapping her robe around
her.

In the bedroom, after changing into their
pajamas, he eased her down to sit on the edge of the bed, fished
the ring from the pocket of his jeans, then got down on one knee in
front of her.

“Officially this time,” he said, ready to
make their love forever. “I have a question for you, Miss
Mason.”

She trembled, holding her breath as she bit
her bottom lip.

“Will you marry me? Will you be mine forever
and let me be yours? No more fear? No more walls between us?”

She nodded, obviously too emotional to speak
as he slipped her engagement ring back on her finger.

Back where it belonged.

And this time, he was ready. This time
nothing held him back.

This time really was forever.

Chapter 38

To be trusted is a greater compliment than being
loved.

-George MacDonald

The diamond caught what little light filtered into
the bedroom through the window, sparkling like her own personal
star. She couldn’t stop staring at it, her hand resting on his
chest.

“I can’t sleep,” she whispered.

Too much had happened in the last twenty-four
hours to allow sleep, even though exhaustion pulled at her body, as
well as her mind. Her dad, Mark’s return, her re-engagement. Her
brain wanted her to fall into dream land, but her spirit wanted to
dance.

“Neither can I.” He shifted and turned on the
light on his nightstand then secured her in his arms again.

“I’m too happy to sleep.” She snuggled
against him. “My dad’s going to be fine. You’re back. What more
could I want?”

If she’d been happy before, she was
practically ecstatic now. She’d forgotten all about the very thing
that had upset her so much to begin with.

“Well, there is one thing left for us to
discuss.” He reached behind him and grabbed his phone from his
nightstand. “Might as well make use of our insomnia and do it
now.”

“What’s that?”

He rolled his head toward her and kissed her forehead
then pressed his lips to hers. “Set our wedding date.”

She smiled against his mouth. “Okay, Mr.
Strong.” She kissed him again. “I’ve been thinking about this
already. How about September? That gives us plenty of time to plan
and—”

He shook his head. “September’s not soon
enough.”

A shiver rattled up and down her spine at the
decisive glint in his eye. “Well then . . .” Her
voice whispered between her lips. “What did you have in mind?”

He grinned. Tiny laugh lines broke around his
eyes. “June, Miss Mason. I want June.”

“June?” Her mouth fell open. “That’s, like,
only a month away!”

“Not if we shoot for the end of the
month.”

“Still, that’s barely only two months. How
are we going to pull off a big wedding in two months?”

“Anything’s possible when you throw enough
money at it.”

She smirked. “And I suppose that’s what you
plan on doing?”

He rolled onto his side, facing her. “I do.”
His eyes opened wide as he sucked in his breath, making an O with
his mouth. “See what I did there? I said, ‘I do.’ I’m
practicing.”

Mark had never spoken so lightheartedly about
getting married.

“Are you okay?” She pressed her palm to his
forehead.

He laughed then pulled her against him,
sighing as he buried his nose in her hair. “I’m not sick.” He
kissed the top of her head. “I’m just ready to marry you,
Karma.”

She smiled against his chest. “That must have
been some two-hour conversation you had with Carol and
Antonio.”

“You could say that.”

“It feels like you’ve let go of a
burden.”

“I have. One I’ve been carrying far too
long.” His hold tightened. “Now it’s just you and me. No more
Carol. No more fear. No more panic.” He patted her rump. “And I
want to get married. The sooner the better. So, let’s set that
date.” He released her and rolled to his back, lifting his phone
and opening his calendar to June.

She shimmied up against him and rested her
head on his shoulder as he scanned through the weeks to the end of
the month.

“If you want a Saturday, we’re looking at
either the twenty-second or the twenty-ninth,” he said.

She shrugged. “If we can get a Saturday in
June, either day works for me.”

His index finger pointed back and forth
between the two days as if he were playing eenie-meenie-miney-moe
in his head. “How about the twenty-ninth, but we keep the date
open? That way, if we find a venue that’s available on the
twenty-second, we can grab it.”

She lifted her head and set her chin on his
chest. “I think we have a date, Mr. Strong.”

His gaze drove deep into hers. So deep she
could feel the love pour from his soul into hers. “I can’t wait to
be your husband, Karma. To start a new journey together as husband
and wife.”

She swirled her fingertips over his chest.
“This new you is going to take some getting used to.”

“Well, get used to it, because I’m not afraid
anymore.”

This was the Mark she’d fallen in love with,
with one exception. He was all hers. And his confidence was real,
not a mask hiding a secret fear.

Carol no longer haunted his memories. Her
shadow no longer fell over his face. She was gone for good.

“What did you and Carol say to one another
that brought about such a drastic change?”

He reclined once more against his pillows.
“It was simple, really.” He shook his head as though he couldn’t
believe how simple it had been. “We both just . . .”
He blew out a cleansing exhale. “Apologized.” He set his phone back
on his nightstand. “She had been holding on to guilt, and I’d been
holding on to resentment. Once we both apologized and forgave the
other, the smoke cleared.” He frowned as he turned his gaze to the
ceiling. “Actually, that’s not entirely true. The moment I realized
she’d been living in her own self-imposed hell the same way I had,
even if hers manifested differently than mine, all the resentment
I’d been carrying all these years just sort of evaporated.” He met
her gaze again. “The reality was that we were both too young to get
married. We started dating and, after a while, thought we
had
to get married. Like we couldn’t possibly have grown
apart and were only meant to be temporary stops in our journey to
find
The One
. Instead of seeing that neither of us was right
for the other, we tried to force it. And then she was too afraid of
telling me she didn’t love me, anymore, and
really . . .” He rolled his eyes at himself. “I was
too one-track-minded to have listened. I wasn’t a good listener in
those days and probably would have convinced her to still marry me,
and then we both would have been miserable, because she still would
have loved Antonio and would have been seeing him in secret.” He
shifted so he faced her again. “You know, the three of us had
dinner while I was there, and it was
actually . . .”

“Nice?”

“Yeah. It was nice. I kind of like
Antonio.”

She burrowed closer. “You do, huh?”

“Yeah. He’s a good guy. All this time, I’ve
blamed him for his part in what happened. But it wasn’t his fault.
It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It was just what had to happen to make me
see.”

“See what?”

He inched closer. “You.”

She frowned. “Me?”

He nodded. “If I’d ended up with Carol—even
if we’d gotten divorced later—my eyes wouldn’t have been open the
night I met you. I might have seen you—I mean, who didn’t in that
incredible red dress you were wearing?” He brushed her hair out of
her eyes then rested his palm against her cheek. “But I wouldn’t
have
seen
you. My eyes would have landed on you for a few
seconds. I would have admired the pretty girl in the red dress. And
then I would have returned to Carol. I would have missed out on the
most wonderful woman in the world, because I would have been blind
to reality and the truth.”

“And the truth is . . . ?”

“That I never belonged with Carol. As much as
I thought I did, she wasn’t my destiny. You are. Everything that
has happened in my life was leading me to you.” He smiled. “And I
almost blew it so many times.”

“Just goes to show that when something’s
meant to be, it
will
be, no matter how badly you try to fuck
it up.”

He laughed at her choice of words. “And I’m
an overachiever when it comes to fucking things up in matters of
the heart, aren’t I?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You didn’t have to. I know it’s true. But
not anymore. I think I’ve finally gotten my shit together.”

“Just as long as you don’t get boring. I’d
hate it if you became too predictable.”

His eyelids slid halfway closed as a roguish
smile curled his lips. “You
did
hear my previous confessions
about the, how should I say, extracurricular sexual activities I
fantasize about, right?”

She hid her face against his chest.
“Yes.”

“Then I think you already know I have no
intention of ever getting boring.”

“Good.” She giggled. “I like being kept on my
toes.”

“And what pretty toes they are.”

“I was wondering when we’d get back around to
that.”

He brushed his foot against hers, chuckling.
“I do love your sexy feet.”

Comfortable intimacy settled over them as
they drifted silently with one another for a few seconds.

Then Mark sighed. “I’d marry you next weekend
if I could.”

“You can, you know. We could just go to
Vegas.”

He shook his head. “No. I want to do this
right. The church. The reception. You on your dad’s arm in a dress
that takes my breath away.”