Gabe (Steele Brothers #6) (24 page)

“I wouldn’t say friendly,” he said, opening his truck door for me. “I think we’re trying to figure out a way to co-exist. He is Char’s dad, which means he’ll continue to be a part of your life. For her sake, I want us all to get along.”

I couldn’t deny I loved that he was willing to set his own feelings about Jason aside for Char’s benefit.

“Thank you,” I said, slipping into the passenger’s seat with a smile. As he closed the door, I hoped he realized I appreciated more than his chivalry. I appreciated the man he was, and the man he was trying to become.

I knew relationships didn’t come easily for him, but he wanted to prove he was capable of making a commitment, to both of us, and I loved him for that.

“So, where are we going?” Since I was wearing a long, blue maxi dress and white flip flops, I felt ready for almost anything, except maybe hiking, which I knew Gabe loved.

“I wanted to show you the house I bought first,” he said, slipping his hand through mine after starting the engine. “I hope that’s okay.”

“Sure. Um, have you thought about what you’re going to do with it?” I wanted to know if he’d talked to the realtor yet. The For Sale sign was still on his lawn, but that didn’t mean his house was still an active listing.

“I’m going to move forward with my plans to renovate it,” he said, cruising to a stop in front of Char’s school. “I might as well. It’s a good investment, not to mention a great family home.”

“So, you plan to sell it?”

“I don’t know.” He took his eyes off the road for a split second to look at me. “A lot depends on what you think.”

“It’s your decision, Gabe.” I didn’t want him to make a decision he would later regret, based on my input alone. “Your money is on the line, right?”

“It’s more than money on the line,” he said, turning down the classic rock radio station that had been playing in the background. “It’s our future.”

I wanted to consider a future with Gabe, but not until we had more time to work out all of the kinks in our relationship. Given all of the roadblocks we’d already hit, I wasn’t naïve enough to believe we’d faced them all.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, obviously sensing my discomfort. “Too soon to think about the future?”

“I thought we were going to take it one day at a time,” I reminded him. “Isn’t that what you said last night?”

“You’re right, but…” He squeezed his eyes shut as we pulled up to a red light, tipping his head back against the headrest. “It’s just so hard not to think about all the things I want with you.”

Okay, that was sweet, but I had to keep a level head this time. For my daughter’s sake as well as my own. Char didn’t need a mother who was losing it over some guy every other week. She needed someone who had it all together, who could be alone if she chose to, and wasn’t dependent on anyone else for her happiness.

“I’m not going to lie,” I said, clasping his hand a little tighter. “Over the past year and a half, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what it would be like if we were a real couple, a family even.” I whispered the last few words, almost afraid to voice them aloud. I knew he thought the world of Char, but for a lifelong bachelor like Gabe, the prospect of being a stepdad had to be daunting. Assuming that was the kind of future he had in mind for us.

“So tell me about it,” he said, grinning. “What would that life look like?”

I so did not want to go there, but I knew if I didn’t, it would look like I was scared. Which I was, but I didn’t want to admit it. “I’m in no hurry to get married again,” I said, hoping he believed that. “But if it happened, that would be great.”

“Go on,” he said, sounding a little dejected.

“And you know I love kids, so it would be nice to be a mom again. This time I’d like it to be with someone who was as excited as I was about the baby.”

“Jason wasn’t excited about becoming a daddy?”

I’d never told him that before. Mainly because I didn’t want it to seem like Jason didn’t love our daughter. In spite of his faults, I knew she was the best thing that had ever happened to him.

“Not really.” I looked out the window, watching the traffic thin out as we turned into a sprawling residential area where I knew Seb and Skylar shared a home. “He was nervous. So was I, but I was excited too. I’d always wanted to be a mom.”

“You’re an amazing mother,” he said, kissing my hand. “I know I’ve told you that before, but it bears repeating.”

Being a mom had been the most important thing in the world to me the first time I looked into her beautiful eyes. Knowing that little person was counting on me for everything was terrifying, but she’d enriched my life in ways I couldn’t have possibly imagined.

“Thank you.”

“I want the chance to be a dad.” He pulled into the driveway of a run-down house with overgrown landscaping. He let his words sink in as he cut the engine. “I’ve thought a lot about this lately,” he said, shifting to face me. “You know, having a family.”

“And?” I needed to hear him say the words.

“I want it.” Again, he was toying with my fingers, sliding his thumb and forefinger up and down my ring finger. I don’t even know if he realized what he was doing as he said, “And I can’t imagine wanting that with anyone but you.”

That admission robbed me of the ability to breathe, much less speak, as tears sprang to my eyes.

“I want the family life I never had growing up. I want to be there for my kids in a way my dad couldn’t be there for me because he was so messed up.”

I had no doubt he would be an amazing father. Just watching him with his sweet little niece and my daughter left me with no reservations about that. “I know you will be.”

“That’s one of the things I love most about you, you know,” he said, reaching out to stroke my cheek. “You believe in me.”

“Of course I do.” It wasn’t difficult to believe in a man like Gabe, whose moral compass always seemed to point him in the right direction.

“I know I’ve given you a million reasons to doubt me lately—”

I covered his lips with my fingertips. “If we’re going to take this one day at a time, I think we need to agree not to waste precious time talking about the past anymore.” I’d fallen asleep thinking about this last night, the sacrifice Gabe had been willing to make for me and what it said about the kind of person he was.

“Does that mean you forgive me?” he asked, sounding hopeful.

“Honestly, there’s nothing to forgive. You did what you thought was best for me because you care. I may not agree with your strategy, keeping me in the dark the way you did, but I know your heart was in the right place.”

He sighed, looking as though he were trying to rein in his frustration. “If you’re not holding that against me, why do I still feel like you’re holding back?”

“No couple builds trust overnight,” I reminded him. “It takes time.”

“We’re not exactly strangers, Kendra.”

“No, but we are new to this whole relationship thing and we’ve hit a lot of bumps already. I just think we need to slow down and be a little more cautious moving forward.” I knew I wasn’t being unreasonable, even if I wasn’t saying the things he wanted to hear.

“Fair enough.” He pointed to the house in front of us. “Let’s go in and have a look. I’d love to hear your thoughts.”

I didn’t know much about home renovations, aside from the small projects Jason and I had taken on in our old house, but since this seemed important to him, I was willing to play along.

“The previous owners moved out already?” I asked, unable to believe how quickly he’d closed on this place.

“Yeah, he was ready to move on. His wife passed away a while back and he just wasn’t able to look after the place anymore. Clearly.” He fit the key into the lock and opened the door, gesturing for me to enter first.

The inside looked like I expected it to: a throwback to another decade. The eighties, judging by the dusty pink carpet and floral wallpaper.

Gabe laughed at my reaction, which I’d been trying to mask.

“I know you must be thinking I’m crazy, but let me tell you about my vision. Maybe you’ll be able to see it.” He took my hand and let me through the musty-smelling living room into a small galley kitchen. Knocking on the wall, he said, “This isn’t load-bearing, which means I can take it down and open this space up.”

As I looked around I realized that would make for a large and much more contemporary living space. “I’m sure it will be great.”

“Given all the natural light,” Gabe said, pointing to the huge windows, “and reasonably high ceiling, I don’t think it’ll be too tough to modernize the space.”

“You’re the expert.” After seeing the magic he’d worked on other homes he’d purchased, including his own, I had no doubt he could pull this off.

“There will be a nice patio back there,” he said, pointing to a huge backyard. “And maybe a pool. What do you think? Would Char like that?”

I frowned, wondering why it would matter to my daughter. “Well, she does love to swim, but—”

“Come on,” he said, tugging on my hand. “There’s lots more to see.” He led me down a hall toward three bedroom, two of which shared a bathroom. “I’m thinking about an addition on the other side of the house, a master suite. My only concern is the nursery.”

“The nursery?” I asked, shaking my head. “What nursery?”

He just smiled, pointing into one of the rooms. “This one is the largest room, so Char should probably get dibs on this one, don’t you think?”

I felt like I was missing something. “Uh, Gabe,” I said, releasing his hand. “What are you talking about?”

“I want this to be our home. Yours, mine, and Char’s.” He chuckled. “And of course we can’t forget Poncho.”

I rubbed my forehead, sure there were deep creases of confusion. “This is all happening way too fast. I thought we agreed last night to take this one day at a time, see where we end up.”

“I know.” He gripped my shoulders. “I know what I said. But I know where I want to end up… right here, with you. Assuming you want to build a life with me?”

“Gabe, I love you, but—”

“Isn’t that all that matters?” he whispered, leaning in to rest his forehead against mine. “I love you more than anything. I’ll do whatever it takes to make you happy, I swear. Just give me that chance.” When I couldn’t respond, he drew back to look at me. “It’s going to take a while to renovate this place. The better part of a year probably. That’s plenty of time for you to figure out whether I’m the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with, right?”

His choice of words made me feel weak and strong at the same time. He was giving me the power to decide where this relationship went, but with it came the power to break his heart, which was the last thing I’d ever want to do.

“Are you saying you want to marry me?” I asked, feeling a rush of excitement at the thought of being his wife.

“More than anything.” He held my face as he rested his forehead against mine. “But not until you’re ready. I want this to be our home, but I’d never want you to feel pressured into making a decision you’re not ready for. I meant what I said last night, one day at a time. But just know I do intend to earn your trust, Kendra. And I don’t care how many days that takes.”

Gabe

I’d been working on the house every spare minute for the past six months and we were actually ahead of my projected schedule. But today was a big day for me. It was the first time Kendra was seeing the house since I’d told her I wanted to share it with her and her daughter.

The past six months with her had been the best of my life and I was more than ready to take our relationship to the next level. But every time I mentioned us moving into the house, she just smiled and changed the subject, so I had no idea if she was ready to call this place home.

I prayed she was because everything I’d done had been with her and Char in mind. I built the master suite with a window seat because I knew how much she loved to sit in the sun while she curled up with a good book.

She loved to cook, so I spared no expense in the kitchen, getting her top-of-the-line appliances and cabinetry with ample storage. A chef’s dream, the kitchen designer claimed.

Then there was Char’s room. I’d painted it her favorite color: pink. I’d even ordered new furniture, bedding, and window treatments fit for a princess. Seb thought I was crazy, since I wasn’t even sure they’d be moving in to the house, but I was operating as though they would be. I couldn’t allow myself to consider the alternative.

I knew this house would sell, if it came to that, but I’d poured my heart and soul into this place and I didn’t want to share my dream with some strangers who already had the family I wanted.

A knock on the front door followed by the sweet sound of Kendra’s voice pulled me out of my melancholy mood. Until I realized she was alone. “Hey,” I said, kissing her. “I thought you were bringing Char with you. I wanted her to check out the house too.”

“I brought her with me, but she’s down the street at Sky and Seb’s place. Macy texted to let me know Brody and Riley were bringing the baby to Seb’s in case we wanted to pass by.” Her eyes widened as she took in her surroundings. “I couldn’t tear Char away from the baby, so Sky said I could leave her with them. I kind of wanted to talk to you alone, anyhow.”

She wanted to talk to me alone? As I watched her gape at my handiwork, I resisted the urge to ask whether she intended to make my dreams come true by moving in with me or break my heart by claiming she wasn’t ready.

“I can’t believe this place,” she said, looking from the dark hardwood floors in the family room to the freshly laid travertine in the adjoining kitchen. “It looks amazing.”

“I’m glad you like it.” I threaded my hand through hers, pointing to some white patches on the light taupe walls. “The painters have to come and do some touch-ups before the window treatments and light fixtures can be installed.”

She took in the white, French cabinetry, gliding a hand over the smooth granite topping the center island. “It looks so much bigger than the first time I saw it. Taking that wall out really made all the difference, didn’t it?”