Gambling On Maybe (5 page)
Authors: Fae Sutherland
Gambling On Maybe
by Fae Sutherland
Eventually, someone would know and someone would tell.
He did give a damn about Stevie, more than he'd thought he could so fast. He wasn't going to fuck up Stevie's plans for his life. Zach might be a selfish diva at times, but coming out was one thing he wouldn't ask anyone to do. Not for him.
So he'd told Jordy he was just doing the right thing for once. Jordy knew him well enough to let it drop, even though Zach could tell he didn't agree. Well, it wasn't his decision; it was Zach's. And he'd already made it.
So there he was, getting a bunch of scarves ready for the display wall, when he heard the bell over the door ring. He didn't glance up since he wasn't on floor duty right then. He just kept folding scarves and sulking. Normally, he'd have several of the colorful beauties wrapped around him in various ways just to enjoy the feel of the fine fabric and the vibrant colors, but today he didn't bother. He'd just splurged on a pair of Blahniks, so he couldn't afford one of the scarves anyway. Just another reason to sulk, as far as he was concerned.
"You know, they say if Mohammed won't go to the mountain, the mountain must come to Mohammed."
Zach's head snapped up, and up and up, from where he sat cross-legged on the floor, eyes widening. "Stevie!"
Stevie grinned. "So you do remember me. I was beginning to wonder." Behind the smile was a bit of sadness that wrung Zach's heart, making his chest tight.
He started to apologize, then remembered why he'd stopped taking his calls in the first place. He couldn't break 41
Gambling On Maybe
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now, even though Stevie had come all this way and looked so hopeful andE Oh, God, he'd missed him.
When Zach didn't say anything else, Stevie's smile faded.
That hurt worse than the earlier tinge of sadness in his forest green eyes.
"So it wasn't a mistake, then. You didn'tEsay, just get back into town from an emergency trip." It wasn't a question.
Zach shook his head, setting down the scarf in his hands before he wrung it to death and had to pay for damaged merchandise. He pushed up to his feet, swallowing hard. "No, I didn't just get back into town. I never left."
Stevie nodded, looking uncomfortable. "I suppose it's poor one-night stand etiquette to be here then, when you've made it clear—" He broke off and sighed. "I just thoughtEthat is, I wanted to ask why? So I know not to do it next time I meet a beautiful man who makes my heart pound." He gave a rough, humorless chuckle. "I'd hate to run him off."
Zach flinched. Just the thought of some other guy climbing all over his Officer Hotness made his inner bitch screech in outrage, but he shoved it down. "You didn't do anything."
"Bullsh—" Stevie all but barked the cut-off word, jaw flexing as he glanced around the little boutique. "Can we talk somewhere private?"
Zach bit his lip. That was a bad idea. Already it was all he could do not to pounce on him and beg his forgiveness for not calling and leaving him hanging and hurting his feelings. But he couldn't say no either because that'd mean sending Stevie away and he wasn't ready, he realized, never to see him again.
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Gambling On Maybe
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So he nodded. "Sure, come on to the back room." He gestured for Stevie to follow him, and in another minute he was shutting the door behind him and they were alone.
"Don't give me a line, Zachary. There has to be some reason you haven't taken my calls since the other night. So what did I do?"
Zach shook his head. "Nothing, I swear. It isn't youE" God it sounded so trite, so lame in the face of Stevie's hurt look, and he couldn't bring himself to tell him lies to his face. He'd never been any good at lying and he hated doing it. "I justEyou're up for a promotion and you want to retire eventually and if people find out you'reEthat we'reE"
"Fucking? Dating? Together?"
Zach winced and nodded, looking up at him. "Yes. All of the above. It'd ruin your life, your plans. Everything you've worked for." He gave Stevie a pleading look. "I don't want to do that to you, I just—"
"Wait a minute!" Stevie shook his head and held up his hand. "How do you know I'm up for a promotion?"
Zach bit his lip again, shuffling one booted toe against the carpet. "WellE"
"Who?" His voice was sharp, the word bitten off. "Who and what did they say to you? Is that why? Tell me, damn it."
"I don'tE Hold on; I have it in my bag." He held up one finger and hurried across the room to the employee lockers, grabbing his bag and rummaging through it for the ticket he'd stuffed inside. He pulled out the crumpled paper and held it out to Stevie. "I ran into one of your co-workers a few days ago."
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Gambling On Maybe
by Fae Sutherland
Stevie took the ticket from him and scanned it, jaw tightening until Zach worried it would break. "Goddamn it."
This time, when Stevie lifted furious green eyes to him, Zach knew instinctively it wasn't him the other man was furious with. Oh, no.
"Stevie, don'tE You can't say anything. She was just trying to protect you, I think, and she's right. If it gets around we're together or messing around or anythingE" He trailed off, shrugging. "Trying to hide me is like trying to hide a giraffe in your office. It's useless to try. It'd get out, and I know you're not ready, maybe don't ever want to be ready for it. That's okay; that's you and I respect your choice, but—"
Stevie apparently decided he'd talked too much—not the first to say so—and the next thing Zach knew he was being kissed silent, lifted off his feet and kissed completely senseless. God, the man was good.
He didn't even try not to kiss him back, arms winding around his neck to cling to Stevie and kiss him for all he was worth. He tasted so good and felt so good andE Zach suddenly didn't think he was strong enough to push him away, or try to, a second time. Look how quickly he'd caved this time.
When the kiss broke and their eyes met, both of them were breathing harder, and Zach didn't say anything at first.
He just looked at him. Waiting. Hoping, if he was completely honest.
"Listen to me. I'm aware of the risks. I'm aware of the potential losses." Stevie didn't put him down, just kind of held him with one strong arm around his waist so they remained 44
Gambling On Maybe
by Fae Sutherland
eye level. "But you don't know what'll happen. I don't know what'll happen. But I do know one thing."
He didn't elaborate right away and, after a few long seconds, Zach lost his patience. "What do you know?"
Stevie smiled. The beautiful, open, wide smile that lit up his whole face and his eyes and made Zach forget his own name.
"I know I want pictures in my wallet. And on my desk. And in my life. I want pictures and I never did before. I never cared. Well, I damn well care now. And it's worth taking a few chances for, I think."
Zach's heart thumped hard, and he didn't know what to say. He shook his head sharply and gave Stevie's shoulders a shove. Stevie frowned, face falling as he set Zach on his feet.
Zach didn't go far. He grabbed his bag and dug in it for his own wallet, hands shaking as he snapped it open and turned back to Stevie. He looked up at him and held out a small, wallet-sized picture. "Here."
Stevie took it, glancing down and when he smiled it was maybe a little shaky. "You carry pictures of yourself in your wallet?"
Zach laughed and sniffed a little, one shoulder lifting in a shrug. "You never know, right?"
Stevie nodded, reaching around to pull out his wallet and there, amid the old receipts and scraps of paper, he slid a picture of Zach into one of the sleeves. Then he looked up at him, his smile steadier now. "It's a good start."
It totes was.
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Gambling On Maybe
by Fae Sutherland
About The Author
Fae Sutherland has always dreamed of being a published author, starting off her writing career at age 11 with a horrific
"Monkees" fan fiction that will, luckily for all, never see the light of day. At age 34, she has since progressed to more serious writing, though always keeping that dash of irreverence and fun.
Fae tells the stories that the muses give her, but though she is multi-published both solo and jointly, she truly does prefer writing with her co-author Marguerite Labbe best.
When she's not working hard on writing new stories to make her readers sweat or slaving over edits for completed work, she spends her time on website and graphic design, being with her closest friends and playing The Sims 2 until the wee hours of the morning.
Find out more about Fae (and Marguerite Labbe, her occasional co-author) at their website: chasethedream.net
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Gambling On Maybe
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Gambling On Maybe
by Fae Sutherland
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Gambling On Maybe
by Fae Sutherland
A war is raging on the world's oceans, and two enemies
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Gambling On Maybe
by Fae Sutherland
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