Girl Online (34 page)

“Oh really, honey? That's wonderful news.”

“It
is
wonderful. And he wants to share the moment with Elliot, but he's not taking Alex's calls. So Alex knows he's going to have to do something big—a
grand
gesture—if he wants to have a chance at winning Elliot back. So I thought I would come and ask you for help, since you are a woman of many ideas, most of which are usually grand—What are you doing?” I watch as Mum dives headfirst into a basket of shoes and handbags.

“I can't find my gold clutch bag at home so I thought maybe someone had brought it in. Do you remember? The one your brother got me for my forty-fifth birthday? I think I might have left a ten-pound note in it the last time I used it.” Her legs are practically up in the air as she throws bags and shoes out of the basket and continues her frantic search.

“Of course . . .” I say, raising an eyebrow as I watch her from my seat by the window.

“Well, I
am
the queen of grand gestures, Penny, so you have come to the right place. What exactly is he thinking? AHA! HERE IT IS!” She stands up, her curly auburn hair all flipped over to one side of her head and her face a deep beetroot red. She puts the gold clutch bag down on the counter, then sits next to me.

“I'm not too sure. He wants it to be romantic. He's thinking of taking him to the pier or something, but Elliot isn't the biggest fan of the pier—too much bad fashion. I don't think he wants the soundtrack to their big moment to be the ringing of the 2p machines either. I just don't know where else there's such an amazing view of the sea at sunset. Alex doesn't exactly have a big budget . . .”

Mum claps her hands together and breathes in theatrically. “I know the
perfect
place! How about the bandstand? I've planned many wedding ceremonies and photo shoots there, so I've got a contact. I can sort that out for you. There's a sea view
and
privacy. Alex can have whatever soundtrack he wants! Elliot will love it.”

This is the exact reason why my mum was the perfect person to ask. She knows anyone and everyone when it comes to planning parties.

“Sounds amazing! We can decorate it and make it look all Pinterest-perfect! That would be so great—thanks, Mum.” I throw my arms round her and kiss her on the cheek. “Do you think we can make it happen for next Thursday?”

“That's soon . . . Let me see what I can do. But this is a
big
favour—maybe I can ask for something in return?”

“Of course! Anything!”

“Help me out here tomorrow? Jenny's still not feeling well and Saturdays are my busiest days . . .”

I hesitate, but only for a moment. I really am OK with being here in the shop. “Sure, Mum. That's fine.”

She smiles at me. “It's so good to see you like this, Penny. You seem back to your normal self. Your dad and I have been so worried about you since . . . since you got back from
Paris. You know we both liked Noah very much, but also you do know you can talk to us any time, don't you?” She cups my face and kisses my nose.

“Yes, I know. I'm all right now. I wasn't before, but if it wasn't meant to be then I can't force it. It was so hard, and if it's
that hard
—”

“Then it's not right.”

“Then it's not right. I think I just needed a bit of space in order to figure out what I really wanted, you know?” I rest my head on her shoulder and she brings me into a hug.

“You're a very strong young woman, P. You must get that from me . . .”

We both laugh, and I thank my lucky stars that I have such amazing and supportive parents who stand by me through everything.

I text Alex.

The only piece of the puzzle left is the fact that I need to plan a distraction in order to have Elliot in the right place at the right time.

Alex has been brave.

Now it's my turn.

“Mum, can you grab our lunch while I send an email? It's an important one.”

“Sure thing! I'll pop out to the deli and get us both some sandwiches. Sausage baguette with scrambled egg, like always?”

I nod, and start a new email on my phone.

From: Penny Porter

To: Miss Mills

Subject: Photography Showcase

Dear Miss Mills,

Thank you for your note about Noah. I'm sorry I didn't reply sooner—I've been living under a rock recently. I feel like I'm doing much better now, though. How are things going with the school showcase? Actually, I was wondering whether it was too late for me to join in? I'm trying to take steps to be brave, and I think this might be a good first step.

Yours,

Penny

Once I send off the email, I absentmindedly open my Twitter feed. I catch sight of a headline that's been retweeted by someone I follow—it's about Noah, but I'm pleased to notice that my heart doesn't twinge
quite
as much as it did even yesterday.

My heart might not twinge, but I still can't control my fingers. I click on the link, which leads to an article on a trashy gossip website called
Starry Eyes
. There's a dark, grainy picture of Noah and Blake walking out of a club somewhere in Europe. Blake is caught in the middle of his normal punching-the-air pose and Noah is just behind him. His face is half-hidden by shadow, but his mouth is downturned and he looks like he's frowning. There are two girls walking next to them, both with bright blonde hair. One looks like she is holding Noah's hand, but it might just be the angle of the photograph.

It is strange to see Noah not looking as fresh and happy as I thought he would. Seeing the girls doesn't make me angry, or even incredibly sad—I just feel empty.

The article continues.

Will rising superstar Noah Flynn find another English rose when he's back on UK soil? Recently confirmed to be playing the PARK PARTY festival in London this weekend, Noah Flynn is set to rock the socks off the English capital. But will these lucky ladies spotted out with him and his band mates
in Stockholm be coming with him? Starry Eyes will have all the gossip . . .

I decide to put myself out of my misery and quickly close the browser window. Instead, I open Pinterest, and start browsing ideas for decorating the bandstand. I scroll past photographs of beautiful weddings and engagement photos galore, but my heart isn't in it. Everything looks beautiful, but also generic. If this is going to work for Elliot, it needs to be personal.

My phone pings with an email. It's from Miss Mills.

From: Miss Mills

To: Penny Porter

Subject: RE: Photography showcase

I thought you'd never ask!

Of course you can still display your photographs in the showcase. It would be an honour. Drop them off at the school when you can.

And I meant what I said, Penny: I'm proud of you.

Miss Mills

I can't believe I'm really doing it. I'm finally going to show my photographs to the public.

Chapter Fifty-One

I am knee-deep in leopard-print wallpaper.

It's my first day back in To Have and to Hold, fulfilling my promise to Mum, and I'm tackling my favourite task: the window display. There are two huge bay windows on either side of the door, and Mum always has a new theme to draw in customers.

Last week was an underwater theme with a mermaid-blue dress, lots of shells dangling from the ceiling, sand on the ground, and a tiara that was full of the most amazing blue and green gemstones.

This week, though, it's a safari theme: a completely new one for Mum! She definitely gets top marks for originality. The dress we are centring the theme on is lacy with a subtle zebra print on the underskirt. It's pretty, but not exactly my cup of tea.

I'm clearing out a giant seashell and replacing it with an oversized stuffed toy of a leopard (Mum found it at a car-boot sale and finally has a place to put it) when Alex walks in.

“Penny—What on earth is that?” Alex almost jumps out
of his skin as I spin round to greet him with the giant leopard under my arm.

“Don't ask. It's for our safari theme this week, and of course Mum has a life-sized stuffed leopard that would look perfect.”

He laughs and grabs my hand, helping me out of the window. “I just dropped in to go through plans for Elliot's surprise. Everything OK?”

“All good! Mum confirmed this morning that the bandstand is free on Thursday night, so it's all systems go.”

“He doesn't suspect anything, right? And you're OK to distract him for the evening? The sun doesn't set until later, so you'll need to make sure he doesn't go home early . . .”

“Stop worrying! He suspects nothing. He thinks he's going to the photography showcase to look after me, so he won't leave me. This will totally be the best surprise he could ever imagine. I can bring him to the bandstand at nine o'clock. I'm so excited. This could bring Alexiot back together and then the world will feel right again.”

“I really hope so. But there is still a chance he could hate everything and never want to speak to me again.”

I reach out and take Alex's hand. “We'll try to do everything possible to make sure that doesn't happen.”

“Penny, that's just it—I think there's something missing. But it will involve asking you another huge favour, and I feel like I've asked too much of you already.”

“No, please ask. This is the biggest thing in your life right now, and, if I can, I want to help you in whatever way possible. Unless you're asking me to rob a bank or something to pay for a giant diamond—”

“No, nothing quite like that!” He squirms awkwardly and beams at me, showing off all his teeth.

Now I'm starting to feel a bit nervous. What could Alex possibly want me to do that is making him go all awkward? I really hope he's not going to ask me to do a weird naked photo shoot of the two of them or something.

“You know how ‘Elements' is my and Elliot's song? I just wanted to check that it would be OK for me to play it on some speakers at the bandstand? I know how you feel about Noah, and I know it could bring up a lot of pent-up emotions, so I just wanted to check . . .”

I feel a huge sense of relief that I'm not going to have to see Alex in his birthday suit. “Of course, that's fine.” I smile, especially seeing my look of relief mirrored in Alex's face. It will mean a lot to Elliot, I know—it was the song that was playing when I took that photo of them.

“Elements” means so much to so many people. I've seen Noah play it so many times onstage and I've seen the effect that is has on the audience. It's the perfect song for anyone who is in love.

I let out a long sigh, and now it's Alex's turn to try to comfort me. “What about you, Penny? Is there no hope for you and Noah?”

I shrug. “I don't know. I really doubt it. We haven't spoken at all since we broke up.”

“Well, you will never know if you don't
try
to speak to him. Even if things don't work out, you need closure.”

He's right, of course. I have to speak to Noah at some point. I've tried to block out the reality for so long, but seeing Alex doing all this for Elliot is really pulling on my
heartstrings. We may not be together, but maybe we could be friends?

But would he even want to talk to me now? He's doing a good job of respecting my last wish not to be contacted—too much of a good job. Maybe he's really angry at me for leaving. Does he still think I was making up the whole Blake thing? There are too many unanswered questions, and I'm not even sure I want to know the answers to them. But, if there was ever an occasion to be brave and bite the bullet by speaking to Noah, it is now, before he jets off on his World Tour and I lose the chance—maybe forever.