At this Papi got real angry and cut short the conversation. “Basta! I don't want to hear that kind of talk. It's a fact that you cannot take care of yourself, even if you think you can. Understand? Now, that's all there is to it.”
I had felt so angry and humiliated that when Papi reached out to make up, I had stepped away from him and left the room. Remembering all of this, I realized I just had to learn to handle things by myself.
My one and only ally, when he came out of his own world, was Tio Jorge. Last Thursday, for example, when I was watching T.V., Tito walked into the living room and switched the channel without even saying one word. When I tried to turn the dial back to my program, Tito started a fight. Right away he shoved me, but I shoved him right back. Luckily Tio was there and came to my rescue. “Get out!” he told Tito. “I don't want you in this room. Don't you dare touch your sister.”
Tito had looked mean, like he was going to give Tio Jorge a hard time, but he thought better of it. He knew that if he misbehaved with Tio Jorge he'd have to account to Papi. I was real pleased when he shut his mouth and left the room. But usually that's not what happens. Usually Tito gets his way.
I looked over at my clock radio, a present my parents had given me last Christmas. It was already six o'clock. I was feeling bored, and even though I had decided to wait till tomorrow to tell Gigi about my trip, I was really tempted to telephone her right away. But then I heard a knock on my door. “Come in,” I said.
The door opened slightly. “It's me, Tio. May I come in?”
“Sure.” I was surprised. Tio Jorge hardly ever came into my room. He shut the door and sat next to me.
“Felita, are you happy to be going to Puerto Rico?”
“Oh, yes, very happy, Tio.”
“Good. I'm glad because I want to be able to teach you about nature. I can't teach you about those things here. You will learn about all kinds of trees, flowers, and birds. You'll also see life in a different way in our village.”
I knew Tio had come in to cheer me up. But he seemed sad, even unhappy. “Tio, aren't you happy to be going?”
“SÃ, of course I am happy.” He smiled. “I'm going home, Felita, that's where I want to beâhome in the countryside where I belong, in my village of Barrio Antulio, where I will be close to nature. That's where I was born and grew up, where I'll spend the rest of my days, meet my maker. I'm not at home here in this country, and I never was. Now, Abuelita, your grandmother, that one liked it here. She enjoyed the city. That's how come we stayed as long as we did. Now I'm going back....” But he still sounded sad to me.
“Well, Tio, I can't wait to go and I'm real happy that I can stay with you for the whole summer.” I put my arms around him and gave him a hug.
“Good.” He got up slowly and left.
I looked out the window and saw that the snow was coming down heavily. Sometimes the flakes fell in bunches, separating in midair like white powder. The lampposts, stoops, cars, and sidewalks, just about everything, were covered with snow. Long dark silver shadows stretched out over the whiteness. Usually I prayed for a storm so that school would be shut down and we could all play outdoorsâhave snowball fights, build tunnels, and just hang out, not having to worry about classes or taking tests. But this evening I wanted the snow to stop so that tomorrow I could tell all my friends about my trip to Puerto Rico.
Chapter
2
The next day I met Consuela and Joanie down near the corner of the large intersection. As usual we all walked to school together. It was routine that we met every morning, because too many tough kids can pick on you if you walk by yourself. There was safety in numbers. I was so happy to see my wish had come true: the sun was shining and melting the snow away. Some kids were busy hollering, sliding, and jumping all over the place, trying to have snowball fights. But the snow was so powdery that most of the balls fell apart even before they got thrown.
This morning I had gotten permission to go over to Gigi's house after school. Gigi's mother is the most easygoing mother I know. I am welcome to visit them anytime, just as long as I get Mami's okay. Gigi's mother even takes me shopping with them and buys me treats and lunch. I call her by her first name and so does Gigi. Before I used to call her Mrs. Mercado, but last year she insisted I call her Doris. When I had told Mami that, she said she thought it was disrespectful, and that Mrs. Mercado must think she was Gigi's sister instead of her mother. But I don't care how Mami feels. I love being with Doris and Gigi because I can be myself. I can say whatever pops into my head and not have to worry about getting an argument back.
When we got to class, I sat next to Gigi and whispered the good news about my trip. Then I added, “Can I come over to your house after school? I got permission.”
“Great.” She nodded.
I could hardly keep my mind on my schoolwork, and when lunchtime came around, I was practically jumping out of my skin. We have our tight little group in school. There is Gigi, Consuela, Elba Thomas, Lydia Cortez, and Vivian Montañez. Today we all sat together like always. I waited for just the right moment, after everyone was settled and munching away.
“Guess what, everybody? I'm going to Puerto Rico for the whole summer!” I announced.
“Wow!” said Elba.
“Really? That's great!” Vivian said. Right away everybody became interested.
“When are you going exactly?” asked Lydia.
“Not until school is over. We're all leaving early in July. My parents and brothers are only staying two weeks, but I'm going toâ”
“Oh, man, look! There he is. There's Vinny!” Vivian interrupted me, and everyone turned away to look at Vinny Davila as he walked by and waved at us.
“He's so cute,” Vivian went on. “I just love his eyes.” She kept on waving at him longer than anybody else with a smile stuck on her face and her teeth hanging out. I tried to get back their attention so I could talk about my trip, but now there was no way they would listen. Everyone was more interested in Vinny, the new boy from Colombia, South America. He had registered at our school only at the beginning of last month. His real name was Vicente Davila, but he had asked everyone to call him Vinny, which he pronounced “Veenie.” Naturally we all knew he meant Vinny, but that Joey Ramos and his dumb gang of friends took advantage of him and made fun of him. They imitated his accent and called him “Beenie.” That really made me mad.
Vinny's English was so bad that they put him back. That's why even though he's a year older than our group, he's in our grade. I heard he's the oldest of five kids. He lives right on my block so I usually see him walking to and from school, but so far I've never seen him hanging out. He has jet black hair and fair skin with freckles. All the girls think he's real cute. And even though I never said it, I gotta admit he's a very handsome boy. But I'm glad he's not in my class. You see, I really can't stand it when all my girlfriends act so silly over boys.
Like right now, for instance, here I am trying to say something important about my trip, and they all don't even care.
“Like I was saying,” I went on. “My brothers are leaving early, which makes me happy. My Tio Jorge says we'll be going for hikes and to the beach andâ”
“Oh, look, here he comes again. Look!” Vivian cut me off a second time and began to giggle. “He's coming our way. Oh, I can't stand it!” She kept right on grinning at him.
“I think you're the one he's looking at, Vivian,” said Elba.
“I sure hope so.” Vivian sighed. “Like who cares if his English stinks. I could teach him how to talk better real quick.” All the girls began to laugh and were now grinning at Vinny like fools. All except Gigi. She just looked at me and rolled back her eyes. By now I was pretty furious. It was like what I had to say was not the least bit important because Vinny came around. All right, I thought, just wait until they all have something important they want me to hear. I'll show them.
“I guess you all are not interested in my trip or care about what I was saying.” I looked directly at Vivian.
“Felita, you ain't even going until the summer,” she said, “and we all got plenty of time to hear about your trip.”
I was so annoyed at her. “Hey, I'm not twisting any arms, so you all don't have to listen. I only figured as my very best friends you'd like to hear about my good news. That's all!”
“We are interested, Felita,” said Elba, “go on and tell us.” I remained silent until they all had to ask me again.
“We're all ears,” said Lydia.
“All right, then.” I was too happy thinking about my trip to stay angry. But there wasn't much time left before lunch was over and we had to get back to class.
After school Gigi and I went over to her house. Last year her parents had bought a big apartment in a development that was a twenty-minute walk from school. It was drizzling out and the leftover snow was turning into rivers of brown mush and disappearing into the drain holes and sewers. The dampness and cold made us shiver. Gigi and I linked our arms and huddled together to keep warm. We walked so fast that we were practically running.
“Imagine, living in a place where it never gets cold,” I said.
“I can't imagine,” Gigi said. “Not on a day like today.”
When we got to Gi's house, Doris gave us hot chocolate and cookies. The three of us sat in the kitchen, where it was warm and cozy.
“Bueno,” Doris said, “what a lucky girl you are to be going on such a long vacation to Puerto Rico.”
“I know.” I sure was feeling pleased. “I already heard so many stories about P.R., ever since I was little. My abuelita told me that everything is so beautifulâthe flowers, mountains ...”
“It's beautiful all right, but it's also changed a lot since your grandmother's time,” said Doris. “I know because when I went there for a visit eight years ago, I found things were a whole lot different than when I was young.”
“Oh, but you see, my Tio Jorge says that we'll be living in his village and that not much has changed there.”
“What's the difference? I know you'll have a great time anyway, Felita.”
“I wish I could go with Felita,” said Gigi.
“Someday we're all going, but we just bought this apartment and you know your father and I can't afford any trips now. But we will have a family reunion in Puerto Rico one day, and you'll meet all your relatives there, Gigi. I promise.”
“Great, Doris.” Gigi kissed her mother. “When is Daddy coming home?”
“Thursday of next week. He wrote that he's bringing us something special.” Gigi's father is a merchant seaman who is away for many weeks at a time. But when he comes home from a trip, it's so much fun, almost like having a celebration. He brings all kinds of pretty things for their home and gifts for Gigi and Doris. Sometimes he gives me something too. Last time I got a bottle of toilet water that smelled like roses.
After we finished eating, Gigi and I went to her room. She has such a big room. It's at least three times the size of my cubbyhole. They even have two bathrooms in their apartment. Would I love to have two bathrooms in my house! Everybody is always fighting to get to the toilet first, or waiting to get in. I can never sit down in peace without somebody banging on the door. In her room Gigi has her own portable color T.V., and last month her father got her a new cassette player.
“You are so lucky, Gigi. I wish I had some of the things you have. Especially my own T.V. Do you know what a pain it is to watch programs everybody else likes except you? When my brothers take over with their sports programs, it's like nothing else matters.”
“But it must be so nice to have two older brothers. It gets lonely being an only child, you know. Nobody to talk to or play with.”
“Are you kidding? Who talks to my brothers? Or plays with them? All they do is boss me around and tell me what to do. Mostly we fight.” I looked around her room. “I wish I was an only child so I could have all these great things for my very own private use.”
“I don't know, but sometimes I would trade in all of this for a brother or sister. When I was little, I always used to ask my parents for a baby sister or brother. First they used to tell me that in the future God would bring me one, but as I got older and kept on asking, they finally told me the truth. There was not gonna be any more kids in this family, they told me. Like I was it. They said that this way they could afford to give me the best of everything, and that they just couldn't afford no more kids.”
“That sounds like a good idea to me. I could do without Tito, even Johnny sometimes, and in that order.”
“Well”âGigi shook her headâ“I still wish I had a sister.”
“But you and I are sisters. Don't you remember the pact we made in first grade? We agreed then that we would always be sisters, and so we are.”
“True.” Gigi looked real sad. “I'm gonna miss you so much, Felita. I wish I could go with you.” Now we both became quiet and sad, thinking about being separated.
“Wait a minute. I'm only going for the summer and I'm not even leaving till July, and it's only March. So why are we feeling so sad?”
“Right!” Gigi laughed, and we hugged.
Â
Gigi walked me part of the way home. I had to get back before five. It still got dark out early and Mami always worried and became nervous if I wasn't home on time. But I also don't like walking home by myself, especially when it's dark out. Sometimes a smelly bum all dirty and drunk comes over to ask for money or some tough kids try to start an argument.