Going Rogue: An American Life (49 page)

Going

Isaac’s parents.
Yes

I thought.
My name

Sarah,

my

band isn’t

His name is Todd!

Unlike the Satah of old, though, I couldn’t laugh with delight. Not yet.

I didn’t want to tell Todd on

phone, so I concentrated instead on my role ar the conference for rhe rest of the rrip. I discussed with representatives of orher oil-and gas-producing states what

needs are and how we can become energy-independent. I also assumed chairmanship of the Interstate Oil and Gas Compact Commission, where I could help influence Congress and the White House on energy and security issues. After my New Orleans speech, I headed home but missed Todd, who had gone straight from Canada, where he was visiting a workforce development program with my commissioner of labor, back to the Slope. Between my job and his we kept missing each other, so it was a few weeks before we were in the same room and I told him abour the baby. He was ecstatic. For him, it’s always been the more the merrier, and he especially wanted boy.

We kept our news

ourselves. We had always been private

about our pregnancies. We didn’t tell anyone about Piper until I was five months along. Our lives were an open book in virtually every other way,so for us rhis was just a special, sacred time, the one thing it seemed that just we two could know and enjoy together.

Later, I saw my doctor, Cathy Baldwin-)ohnson, at our Health Care Commission conference, where I had appointed state offi_

cials and private professionals to discuss freemarket solutions ro the state’s health care problems. I addressed the group and then looked for Cathy, whom we called “CB).” She had been named the Family Physician of the Year by the American Academy of Family Physicians in 2002 and had also launched a facility for •

17.3

•

SARAH

PALIN

sexually abused children. She was admired by many

rhe

counrry for her extraordinary skills and especially her compassion for patients. I had witnessed thar firsthand. B’etween Willow and Piper, I had had a second miscarriage. But instead of treating our loss as if ir were something ro ignore, CBJ had been so kind, so caring; she even cried with me when she had ro deliver the news that we’d lost the baby. After that loss, in my own heart, 1’d also noticed a change. My first miscarriage had sent me into a valley of despair, but 1’d made ir through ro the other side. Like everyone else, I coped differently with each episode of grief. I grieved when I had that second miscarriage, roo, but with so many people now depending on me, I had to react differently. Life does roughen up your reactions ro devastating news.