Haeven (35 page)

I spent a good portion of my morning looking
over our summer photos but that only made me feel Evan's absence
even more acutely. So I tried distracting myself by studying for my
driver's test and catching up on my laundry and so forth. By
mid-afternoon I had run out of diversions and decided it might be a
good day to give Ares a bath. I hadn't seen him for a few hours and
wondered where he had gotten off to. He was too big to overlook so
after a quick check of the downstairs I wandered back up and
eventually found him in Evan's room lying beside his bed and gazing
longingly toward the doorway.

He looked so mournful that it brought a few
tears to my eyes, "Yeah, we all feel about the same buddy."

Ares picked his head up and wagged his tail,
happy I guess, just to have someone talking to him. I sighed and
rather than tormenting him by following through with my plan for a
bath I sat down beside him and absently stroked his belly. I had
never really spent much time in Evan's room and just now seemed to
notice how many things he had kept from his youth.

Most of it was standard stuff you would
expect to find in a guy's room; a baseball and glove, trophies,
pictures of sports heroes and so forth. There was a picture of him
and I together on his nightstand that I picked-up and took a
cursory glance at. We were so young and I guessed it must have been
taken close to around the time when I...

"I what?" I wondered. "Did I run away? Did
someone take me? If someone did why did they send me back? Or did I
escape?"

They were all questions I thought about from
time to time, never with much persistence, though. Sometimes it
seemed like I shouldn't remember, that if I tried to remember or if
I did actually learn the truth that it would have been much more
painful than the not remembering. While I was having these thoughts
I stopped petting Ares and he soon decided that my break had been
long enough. He wiggled out from behind me and stood up while
shaking and stretching himself.

He went to the door and glancing over his
shoulder he looked at me imploringly.

"Outside?" I asked.

Funny how one word can have such an effect on
a dog. He bounded back to where I was still sitting and urged me to
get up. As I did something in Evan's closet caught my eye. It was
an odd little, hand painted box latched closed with a tiny, luggage
style lock. I don't know why but seeing it made me smile and
instead of taking Ares out like I planned I went to the closet and
brought the box down.

I searched all the places I thought Evan
might have hidden the key and after several minutes with no success
decided to go ahead and pick it. I knew it was wrong but I was
absolutely determined to know what was in the box. I went
downstairs and after searching through my father's junk drawer went
back to Evan's room with a miniature screwdriver and forced it into
the lock.

Ares seemed to know that I was up to no good,
either that or he was just determined to get me to follow through
with my promise to take him out. I shooed him from the room and
closed the door. He took a strong exception to the snub and started
scratching at the door.

"Emily? Are you in there?" I heard the
doorknob turning and guilty tucked the box back into the closet.
"What are you doing?" my mom asked as she poked her head in.

"Just missing Evan," I nervously replied.

"Well, somebody is missing you it seems," she
ruffled Ares ears. "I think he wants to go outside."

Ares spun around excitedly and raced down the
hallway to the top of the stairs and back.

"Yep," I smiled, "I think you're right."

I took one last, quick glance at the box and
suddenly felt all the shame for what I had been about to do. It
seemed very wrong and very disrespectful.

"It's not like I can't just ask him about
it!" I scolded myself as I left the room. "He'll call and when he
does I can just mention it somehow in passing. I bet I won't even
have to ask and he'll just go ahead and tell me."

I forgot all about it until the day of my
driver's test. I was so nervous that I couldn't eat. My mother
drove me to the DMV and when it was finally my turn I was sent to
one of the computer stations where I logged on and took the written
exam. It would have gone by or should have gone by a lot quicker
but I was so determined to pass that I went over every question
multiple times to make sure I absolutely got it right.

Since there was no sense in taking the road
test without first passing the written, the results came back right
away. I was thrilled when I saw that all my studying had paid off
and that I had gotten every single answer correct. I went back to
the waiting area where my mother congratulated me then we sat and
chatted together until one of the testers was available to take me
on the road exam.

After about 15 minutes or so I was summoned
to the counter and told where to go to meet the person who would
give me the actual driving test. He was very gruff and spoke
without bothering to look at me or anything really, other than his
clipboard. I did everything by the book - took the driver's seat,
checked all the mirrors, etc. then started the car.

As we went the tester gave me step by step
instructions for everything he wanted me to do; merge into traffic,
change lanes, left turn, right turn and so forth and so on.
Everything he asked I did confidently and correctly until it came
time to parallel park. My mom had a fairly small car and I had
practiced parking dozens of times so it should have been quite
easy. I don't know what came over me but I didn't get it on the
first try, or the second. By then I was so nervous and ashamed that
I barely managed to accomplish the feat on the third try but the
tester seemed satisfied.

"Good enough," he grumbled. "Take this left
and head back to the building."

I thought for certain that he would fail me
but apparently my inability to park didn't make me a hazardous
driver. My examiner handed me a form at the end of the test which I
took to the counter. After waiting in line for another handful of
minutes I found myself standing in front of the camera with a
tremendously giddy grin. A snap and a flash, another short wait
then I was called up to the counter one last time and handed my
license.

I triumphantly held it up for my mother to
see.

"Just like that," she smiled.

"Just like that," I snapped my fingers in
emphasis.

When we got home I immediately phoned Evan to
let him know. My call went straight through to his voicemail so I
left a brief message and asked him to call me back when he had a
chance. Midway through dinner he returned my call and apologized
for not getting back to me sooner. He told me he had his phone in
airplane mode so it wouldn't distract him during class then he
never remembered to switch it back.

"Anyway!" I could hear the excitement in his
voice. "You did it, huh? Got your license and now you can come
visit me."

"Yep!"

"Well, let's make some plans then. How about
this weekend? I'm not sure what's going on but I
am
sure
that something will come up...something always does!"

"Sounds great!"

"Good. There's a decent hotel nearby, I'll
give you the address."

"Oh, but I thought..."

"Trust me, you don't want to stay with me in
the dorms. You probably wouldn't even want to come anywhere near
them, at least I wouldn't if I were you. You can just tell Mum that
I'll be staying with you so she won't worry."

"I will but you're welcome to stay, you know,
if you like."

"We'll see," he sounded uncomfortable with
the suggestion.

We made our plans and though I had forgotten
to ask the first few times we talked since he went back to school I
finally remembered the box.

"Hey, Ares was in your room the other day and
when I found him there I saw something in your closet and couldn't
help wondering what it was."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Some kind of box with a lock."

Evan laughed a little, "My treasure chest! I
haven't looked in that for years. Why don't you go get it and have
a look?"

"No..." I quickly refused even though I was
thrilled at the prospect.

"Yeah, go ahead. I doubt there's anything
worthwhile in it. Probably some old coins or my," he coughed
suggestively, "my magazine collection."

"Eww!"

"Hey, what's a boy to do, you know?"

"OK, you've said more than enough now."

"Actually...you know what, I think there
might be something of yours in there."

"Really? What?"

"I don't know. Some necklace or charm or
something. I found it in your room the day we realized you were
missing. I took it and hid it before the police came and...wow...I
guess I just didn't want them to take it. I can't believe I
remember all that!"

"Well, maybe I'll have a look before I go to
bed tonight."

"You should. It was actually quite pretty
whatever it was," I thought I heard a girl's voice calling to Evan
in the background. "Listen, I've got to get going. Call me before
you leave and I'll meet you at the hotel and help you get
settled."

"Will do."

We said goodbye and afterwards I just sat
there for a while thinking about what he had said. Now that I had
his permission and he had told me what I could expect to find I
wasn't so sure I wanted to look in the box. It was one of those
strange reactions you get when you're suddenly given exactly what
you want only to find out that it wasn't what you wanted at all. I
decided to put it off. The box wasn't going anywhere and neither
was I, at least not until the weekend. It could wait.

Over dinner I told my parents about my
conversation with Evan and my plans to visit him. My dad was very
open to the idea but my mother had a million and one questions. She
didn't seem satisfied with any of my answers and towards the end of
dinner I thought she would either ask me not to go or simply tell
me that I couldn't. I just looked at her and shook my head.

"Mum," I began. My dad tried to interrupt
sensing that whatever I had to say would lead to either an argument
or at the very least a very unpleasant disagreement between my
mother and I. I gave him a long look then turned back to my mother.
I tried to sound understanding and apologetic but determined, too.
"I am going to visit Evan. I am going to stay at a hotel near the
campus and if he doesn't have plans Evan is going to stay with me
but I doubt very much that that will be the case. I am sorry if
that worries or upsets you but it's my decision and it has already
been made."

I nodded to both my parents, collected my
plate to put in the dishwasher and headed upstairs to my room. I
went back down an hour or so before bedtime and though I could tell
my mom was still angry with me I sat down beside her. Together we
watched a show she had recorded the day before. I knew it wasn't a
very poignant effort but I hoped it would at least serve as a first
step towards breaking the ice between us.

When the show was over I said goodnight and
called to Ares. After a quick walk we went upstairs and got ready
for bed. I felt terrible for upsetting my mother and knew I would
have a hard time falling asleep. Though I said I wouldn't and still
felt like I shouldn't I decided to get Evan's box down and open it
up like he suggested. After collecting the chest from Evan's closet
I brought it to my room and using my dad's mini-screwdriver I
jimmied the lock open.

Much to my surprise it was virtually empty.
Just a few scraps of trash as far as I could tell and not much
more.

"Well, that was anticlimactic!" I thought and
wondered if he had made the whole thing up just to see if I would
actually fall for it.

I decided I had better not mention opening it
to Evan just in case. Then full of disappointment I slammed the lid
closed and started towards my door so I could put it back where I
had found it. When I did though I heard a strange noise come from
inside the box, like something had fallen from the lid to the floor
of the case. Frowning I opened it back up and there was the
necklace he had told me about resting on the bottom of the box.

The lid had a hidden door built into it with
a ½ inch thick secret compartment behind it. I realized that it
must have gotten jarred open when I slammed the chest closed.

"Huh," I cautiously picked up the intricate
chain and held it in front of my eyes while I watched the strange
charm sway and spin for a moment.

I couldn't imagine ever wearing anything like
it. It didn't seem like me, or what I knew of me, at all. I looped
it over my head and beneath my hair then went to the mirror to see
how it looked. It was actually kind of cute I decided and tucked my
hair up on top of my head to get a different perspective. 
 The jewel-like orb centered in the middle of the charm was
very odd and its vibrant red color seemed to shift and change like
some kind of liquid when it caught the light. I decided it must be
some strange illusion made by the gem itself as I tentatively ran
my fingers over it.

"Interesting," I mumbled.

When I was done with my inspection I took it
off and hung it on one of the bedposts. I laid down and rolled to
the side and watched it dangle while I tried to fall asleep.
Looking at it made me feel a little sad for some reason and I
reached out once or twice to touch it or to run my fingers over the
strange smooth, orb again. It was rather soothing, almost hypnotic
and despite all the tension I was feeling I fell asleep not long
afterwards.

The conversations between my mother and I
were terse and to the point for the rest of the week but when
Friday afternoon finally came and it was time for me to leave she
broke down and apologized. She gave me a dozen or more different
precautions and made my father do a thorough inspection of the car
before I left. I smiled at and patronized all that she had to say
and do before she finally hugged me goodbye. My dad was much less
dramatic and simply shook my hand, pulled me closed and urged me to
be sensible and cautious.