Hailey's Truth (44 page)

So why did he still feel wretched inside? Austin flicked a glance to the stairs. Because Hailey was upstairs and she wasn’t his anymore. Never would be. He’d killed her brother; Hailey would never be able to forgive him. “I need to get out of here, man. I need to clear my head for awhile.”

“It’s interesting you should say that.”

“Oh yeah?”

“We just accepted a new contract with the Feds. I need someone to check it out before I sign my name on the dotted line. I’m thinking about sending Jackson and Tucker, but I want everything seen to first. Our little adventure in Mexico will be the first and last time we take anyone’s word on accommodations.”

“Where?”

“Southeastern Kentucky.”

Austin’s brow shot up. “Kentucky? What the hell’s in Kentucky?”

“Appalachia, my friend. The first lady’s new pet project. She wants to pick up where Robert Kennedy left off, and the locals aren’t real happy.”

Austin shook his head. “You lost me.”

“Kennedy wanted to bring aide to the people of Appalachia. The poverty levels are shocking from what I’ve researched. The first lady is pushing for a three-year grant to bring teachers to the area—doctors, dentists, etcetera, etcetera. The goal is to get the place back on its feet. Drugs are rampant, the poverty, as I said, astounding, and several of the clans in the area aren’t thrilled with being the first lady’s project. They’ve already burned down a structure. Threatened to kill anyone who comes.”

“Three years is a long time.”

“Yeah, it is. I don’t expect our men to stay. I’m thinking six month stints, then we’ll cycle them out.”

“So, you’re happy with Tucker’s work so far?”

“Surprisingly, yes. For someone who almost got my wife killed, he’s done well. He completed all of the training at the top. Having another agent with a police background is a huge advantage for us. The clients he’s worked with are pleased. I can’t complain.”

“Good. I like him. He’s a good guy. Other than the part about almost getting Sarah killed.”

“I’ve chalked it up to police procedure. I’m mostly over it.”

“So, when do I leave?”

“Take a few days first.”

“No.” Austin shook his head. “I want to go as soon as possible.”

“You can run, but you can’t hide.” Ethan said in a singsong voice as he glanced at the ceiling.

“I need to smooth it out. I really messed her up.”

“Been there, done that.” Ethan slapped a hand on Austin’s shoulder in a show of support. “You guys’ll be all right. Go home. Get some sleep. Book yourself a flight. I’ll see you in a couple weeks.”

He and Hailey definitely wouldn’t be all right, but he left it alone. “E-mail me the details. I’ll leave first thing in the morning.” Austin piled his dishes, scooted back from the table.

“Get me some preliminaries. I’ll send Jackson along next week.”

“Sounds good.” He stood and walked over to Kylee. “Thanks for breakfast.” He kissed her forehead. “You’re a good cook.”

Kylee smiled.

Morgan and Sarah’s voices trailed down the hallway. Hailey wouldn’t be far behind. He wasn’t ready to see her. There was too much to say, too much on the line to get it wrong. He would take his two weeks, stay busy, and try to work it all out. Austin put the dishes in the dishwasher. “See you, man.”

“Your keys are on the hook in my office.”

“Thanks.”

Chapter 27

H
AILEY WALKED INTO HER APARTMENT for the second time that day. She shoved her keys in her purse and set her bag on the small entryway table as she glanced around at the boxes she’d packed throughout the morning.

Jeremy’s items sat in a corner for donation, except for the two or three things she was keeping. She twisted the pretty pearl ring she discovered among the loose change scattered in his top drawer—the one she’d treasured from her mother, the one she’d given to Jeremy with a promise she hadn’t been able to keep.

Among the debris in his closet, she found a tattered picture of she and him taken so many years before. She had stared at the photograph for a long time, studying the living room she remembered from her childhood; the seven-year-old boy with hopeful eyes and her herself, grinning, confident, ready to take on the world. Then she came across the three-by-seven family portrait, the last one taken before their lives were ripped apart.

Her mother had been so beautiful, so kind. Her dad so strong and sure. And their children: Hailey Roberts and Jeremy Kagan—two stunning kids—a testament to what good, loving people could do for lost souls. Or one anyway.

Over the last two weeks, Hailey had come to realize that as much as her parents tried, Jeremy had needed so much more of their time. He’d been broken, perhaps broken beyond what love was able to fix. Jeremy had been a sweet child, so full of potential, so capable of being more than he’d chosen to be. But the lights had gone out for her brother the day their parents met their fate on a dark, icy road. He’d stopped fighting the odds of being just one more broken kid in the system.

She hadn’t. Life had thrown her several cruel pitches, yet she made something of herself. Perhaps things weren’t turning out the way she wanted, but she would keep going because that’s what she did.

The time Hailey spent with Sarah and Ethan over the last several days put life back in perspective. She’d come to terms with her feelings about Jeremy. She would always love him—or the parts of him that saved family pictures and heirlooms, the boy that had been her little brother all those years before.

Hailey had picked out and arranged for a gravestone to be placed next to her parents. The marker would offer closure and symbolize her goodbye to the young boy she had adored with all her heart. She’d done all she could to try to save him from himself, but in the end, he’d been a grown man responsible for the life he made.

Ethan had helped her resolve her financial issues. She was officially back in the black. She still had her friends—the family she’d made with the Cookes and Phillips. She still had her job. Her college career was a big fat question mark, but Hailey was prepared to fight anyone who called her a thief.

That left Austin. He was the one dark spot in her life—the one person she couldn’t find any resolve for, any closure. Morgan and Sarah had assured her of Austin’s love, but sometimes love wasn’t enough. He vanished when they got home. She hadn’t seen or heard from him since he deposited her on her bathroom floor—not that she actually expected to.

How long would it be before she could think of him and not want him, not need him? Would she ever stop mourning what they would never have? She missed him, loved him, and could only be grateful for the sacrifices he made for her—for all of them.

She needed to thank him, to apologize, to try to make things right—make everything a little easier, at least. But he had to come back first.

With a long sigh, Hailey picked up the next empty box, wandered to her small shelf of flowery knickknacks, and got to work. The decision to move in with Ethan and Sarah hadn’t come lightly, but it made the most sense. She couldn’t afford her apartment without a roommate, and it would be easier all around with Ethan’s busy schedule and Sarah taking on jobs here and there.

She paused when she heard a knock on the door. She set down the sheet of packing paper, walked to the door, peeked through the security hole. Hailey’s heart tumbled in her chest as she stared at Austin. “Holy crap,” she muttered.

She wasn’t prepared for this. He wasn’t supposed to be home for a couple more days, or so Ethan had told her. Well, he was here now. “Okay.” Hailey shook out her hands, trying to relieve her nerves. “Okay,” she said again as she held a hand to her shuddering stomach, took a deep, calming breath. She pressed her lips together, twisted the knob.

“Hey.” Austin gave her a small smile and shoved his hands in his jean pockets.

“Hey.” Dear God, he looked good. His hair was wet from a shower. His muscles were so…mouthwatering. He smelled amazing. Hailey wanted to reach out to him, to hug him, but he was off limits.

“Ah.” He rocked back on his heels.

“Oh. Oh, come on in.” She held the door wider, rolled her eyes at herself as he walked through.

“You’re packing. Why are you packing? Where’re you going?”

She caught the hint of alarm in his voice, felt a small thrill. Maybe all was not lost. “I can’t afford to stay here by myself so I’m moving in with Ethan and Sarah for a while.”

“Oh.” He jammed his fingers back in his pockets and heaved out a heavy breath. “Hailey, can I talk to you for a minute?”

Wasn’t that what they were doing? “Yeah, sure. Take a seat.” She gestured to the loveseat. “Do you want something? I think I have some iced tea or water or…iced tea,” she finished lamely. God, she needed to get a grip.

“No, thanks.” He sat down. “Would you mind sitting too? I think it’ll make this easier.”

“Okay.” She rushed over to the arm of the small couch, plopped down, and sat rigid with nerves, fiddling with her fingers.

“Your lip looks good.”

She pressed her finger to the lip in question. “Yeah, it’s all better.”

“Your bruising’s almost gone too.” He reached up, skimmed his knuckle across her cheek.

She closed her eyes at the warmth of his gentle touch.

“Hailey,” he said quietly.

She opened her eyes. He’d moved closer. She gave him a nervous smile, eased away a bit.

“I have something for you.”

She cleared her throat, swallowed. “Yeah?”

Austin reached in his back pocket and pulled out a folded envelope.

“What is it?”

“Open it and find out.” He handed it over.

The university’s address was stamped in the left corner. She licked her lips, opened it, and pulled out a sheet of paper. Scanning the words, her eyes widened. “Oh my God. The university isn’t going to take my credits away.” She beamed at him, then kept reading. “Holy
cow
.” She pressed a hand to her chest. “They’re giving me credit for Project Mexico. I can’t believe this. I get to graduate next semester. How in the world…” She stared at him. “You did this. How did you do this?”

He shrugged. “The Dean and I had a discussion.”

“And? Is that all you’re going to tell me?”

He shrugged again and gave her a smile. “Pretty much.”

She smiled back. “Well, thank you.” For a moment everything felt normal between them—easy. Hesitating, Hailey sunk on the cushion, her thigh brushing his, gave him a hug. “Thank you.”

His solid arms wrapped around her, pulled her close. His hand settled in her hair, pressing her face to his chest. “You deserve those credits, Hailey. You were amazing.”

Closing her eyes, she held on to him. What could she say as her heart pounded in an unsteady rhythm, breaking all over again? She didn’t want to let him go, but he wasn’t hers, so she eased back. “You were—you were pretty great yourself.”

“Thanks.” He skimmed his finger along her jaw and stared at her lips.

Hailey’s stomach twisted in painful knots. She rushed to her feet, confused, unsure of where they stood. “Uh, I should probably pack.”

“Wait.” Austin snagged her hand as she started toward the remaining shelf of pretty knickknacks. “We need to talk, Hailey. I figured after you got my message, you would’ve at least given me a chance to explain.”

“Message? What message?”

“I left you a voicemail right after you left the apartment—in Mexico.”

And then she remembered. Austin had called, but she hadn’t been strong enough to listen. “I—I never heard it. I was going to wait until I got home, then I had to throw my phone overboard.”

Tension choked the room again as the yacht and everything that happened came to the surface.

“You texted Jackson before you tossed it.”

“Yeah. I knew I only had one shot.” She picked up a piece of packing paper, crumpled it, balling it tight, squeezing the wad as she vibrated with nerves.

“What does that mean?”

She shrugged. “It doesn’t really mean anything.”

“No matter how things were between us—are between us—were,” he corrected again, shaking his head, “I would’ve helped you, Hailey.”

She turned away, tossed the ball of paper on the floor, and picked up another sheet. “I couldn’t be sure.”

Austin rushed to his feet, yanked her around. “How can you say that?”

“What do you mean ‘how can I say that?’ Not even twelve hours before you’d told me we were through. You didn’t want anything more to do with me.” Sighing, she closed her eyes. Here they were again, even after some time. Any hope that they could work things out was quickly vanishing. “Look, it doesn’t matter anymore.” She removed her arm from Austin’s grasp. “You should go.”

He walked away a step, then turned. “I’m not leaving. I have things to say, things I should’ve said before but didn’t get the chance.”

“Then say them. I have stuff to do,” she snapped. Shaking her head, sighing, she pressed her fingers to her temple. “I’m sorry. That was rude. I’m out of sorts. The least I owe you is the opportunity to speak.” She took her seat on the loveseat again.

Austin sat as well, massaging his fingers over his chin. “I don’t know how to start, so I guess I’ll start with an apology.”

She frowned. “An apology? Why? You saved my life.”

“And took your brother’s.”

She stared at the hardwood floor, struggling with her torrent of swirling emotions. “I miss Jeremy.” She grabbed Austin’s hand as he tried to move away. “I miss the little boy I lived with so long ago. The sweet brown-eyed boy who had so much love to give, so much kindness in his heart.” She met his gaze. “But he’s gone. He vanished the night I left him alone in the hospital.”

“Hailey.” He moved closer.

“No, let me finish. I’ve had a lot of time to think.” She pressed her lips together. “I didn’t have any choice back then. I had to go, had to leave him. I was only fourteen, but I never got over the guilt, never got over the pain of losing my entire family in one night—in one way or another. I wanted to pick up with Jeremy where we left off. I wanted to believe that was possible, so I overlooked so many things. Too many things.” She squeezed his hand. “And lost everything that was truly important.”

He stared at her, gripping her fingers. “I don’t know where to go from here.”

“I’m not sure either.” She pulled free of his hand.

“Maybe we could start with friends.”