Halfling (Black Petals Book 1) (17 page)

“Never mind,” I correct myself with embarrassment. I thought I’d done my weird little rant in my head, apparently I said Jesus crunching crap nuggets out loud. He probably thinks I’m nuts. “So, how are we going to fix me?”

“Well, Megan,
actually
, it’s your lucky day.”

“What do you mean?” I demand. How in the
hell
is this my
lucky
day?

“I am a man of many things. Compulsion just happens to be one of my talents.”

It takes me a moment to gather myself. “You can fix this?” I point to my head. “You can fix me? You can do stronger compulsion than my father?”

He nods and grins. “It sounds like you doubt me. I can assure you that my compulsion is far stronger than your father’s.” A sexy smirk takes over his face.

He’s right. I do kind of doubt this, but I don’t really know why. There isn’t any reason for me to think that Aiden isn’t as strong as my father. “Well, what are you waiting for? Why haven’t you fixed me? Do it now! How long have you had these suspicions anyway? You couldn’t have brought this up sooner?” I ramble off, still pointing excessively at my head like it’s somehow going to help.

“A mind is a very intricate and personal thing, Megan. I wasn’t about to invade your privacy like that. Though some people have low morals, I am not one of them. I do not access one’s mind unless they give me permission or circumstances are dire. Too much compulsion in so little time can screw someone partly human up. I’ve been watching making sure that I was correct in my observations. It’s not safe. I had to be sure, before I went poking around in there.”

“This
is
dire.” I argue. Now that I know I’m missing a part of me, not feeling is making me feel strange.

“I have your permission then?” he asks, one eyebrow cocked.

“Yes, fix my head, Aiden,” I plead, staring up into his dark, ominous eyes. “Fix it now.”

His lips quirk, and he tilts my chin up with his fore finger, so I’m staring directly into his eyes.

Though I know I don’t black out, I don’t remember anything from this time until what must be minutes later when he finally removes his gaze from mine.

“How’s that?” he asks skeptically, taking in my expression in full.

Suddenly there are a lot more thoughts running through my head than I’m used to, and I begin to feel dizzy. It’s like a New York subway in my head. Thoughts rush around like they’re late for meetings or something. Oh my gooey meatball tin sandwiches.

“Megan?” Aiden asks, concern taking over his features. He grabs my shoulders and helps me sit down, before I fall down.

A million emotions flash in front of me, as I try to sort them out. Anger, sadness, stress, confusion, hurt, and anxiety only to name a few. These emotions weren’t completely taken away from me before, but they were definitely numbed to a great extent. This makes me angry, irritated, and pissed off at my father for doing this to me.

“Megan?” Aiden tries again.

This time my eyes flash to his.

He stares back sympathetically and
worried.
“Are you alright?”

I nod one quick nod. I’m not alright, but I’ll be alright, once I have the chance to sort through all of this pent up emotion.

“Megan, you’re alright. I’m here,” he attempts to soothe me, grasping my hand in his and squeezing tightly.

Aiden
. Has he become my new Crispen? Have I come to care about him just as much as I do…or
did
Crispen without realizing it, maybe even more? New emotions regarding Aiden filter into me that I couldn’t really feel before. I’m definitely no longer numb.

Aiden has taken care of me, taught me, helped me through all of this while Crispen never came for me, and when I went to him, he tried to kill Aiden, then he put me on his hit list with the demons.

“Aiden?” I whisper.

“Yes, Megan?” he answers, curiously.

“Thank you.”

“Thank you for what?” he asks, curiosity deepening.

“Thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”

“You don’t need to thank me. I should thank you for giving me company. Are you sure you’re alright?” The glint in Aiden’s eyes tells me that he sees the difference in me that I feel. A special kind of warmth arises in his expression, and his arm droops over my shoulder to comfort me. “I can’t believe that it took me this long to figure it out. I’m sorry. I guess I’m just used to hanging out with humanity-less assholes. I feel like an idiot.”

“What are you sorry for?” I ask him, tears welling in my eyes, as I become overwhelmed with emotion.

“I’m sorry for not bringing back your humanity sooner. I
knew
something was off, but it took me too long to recognize the signs. I thought maybe something made you so emotionless while you were human. I should’ve guessed Blayne would have done this to you.”

So he blames my father too? I wonder just how well he knows the guy. He’s only come up in conversation a few times, because I hate talking about him. I’m not a daddy fan, especially not now.

“It’s not your fault. I blame my father. I hardly know the man, I’ve only really spoken to him once that I recall, and I know enough to know that he’s an ass.”

“You have that right, though I’d never tell the guy that to his face. He has quite the temper.”

We begin walking back to the house. As we walk, I struggle to keep my vision clear of tears. I’m a wreck. I
knew
that I should be freaking out more. I knew I should’ve freaked out more when this entire world was first introduced to me by Crispen. I knew something was wrong. It took me nearly six weeks to get over the fact that I was kidnapped by Blayk and Landon, yet finding out that demons and hunters exist barely made me bat an eye. Knowing that someone has messed with your head without your permission is not a good feeling. In fact, I feel violated and outraged.

“How do you feel about Crispen now?” Aiden asks, and I’m confused by his question. Why does he care how I feel about Crispen?

His question
does
make me think though. I’m still
pissed
at Crispen and
hurt
. I’m on his hit list for hanging out with a demon who is actually one of the nicest people I’ve ever met? It makes no sense. I remember Crispen telling me that the hunters have an intense need to kill and are pulled to demons by instinct. I wonder if his instincts are over ruling his common sense. Is he so wrapped up in instinctively wanting to kill demons that he can’t even give them a chance to prove their innocence?

I’ve met a few demons. I’ve met far more demons than hunters if you count all of the guards and servants here at Aiden and I’s home. Some like my father, Blayk, and possibly Landon are complete assholes, but Aiden is no different than any human. Terry neither. My books tell me that pure bloods aren’t capable of many emotions, grief being one of these, but have I not seen Aiden suffering from the loss of his daughter? I
know
he feels grief, which means that I know the books are wrong.

Most of the guards are friendly and the servants as well. None of them have threatened to kill me, not even my father has done that, yet Crispen has. Again, I’m not saying that I’m on the demon’s side, but I’m not saying that I’m on the hunter’s side either.

“Megan?” Aiden asks, and I realize that I haven’t answered his question.

“Sorry. I don’t know how I feel about Aiden. I’m…angry at him, but I’m mostly hurt that someone I care about so much, and I thought cared about me just as much, has sent me a death threat for no reason.”

“That’s why you’re crying, isn’t it?” he wonders as if he’s unsure.

“I’m crying because there’s a lot going on in my head right now. Crispen is definitely part of the reason, but so is the fact that I’ve been living with a demon for two months, and it didn’t bother me at all.” I use my sleeve to wipe some more tears from my face.

Aiden looks a little sad. “So you’re crying because you’ve been living with a demon, or because you’ve been living with a demon and it hasn’t bothered you?”

Living with Aiden still doesn’t bother me now that I have my emotions back. I’ve gotten to know Aiden well, and I consider him not only to be an excellent mentor, but a very close friend as well. I’ve seemed to have skipped most of the shock of all of this and gone on to acceptance instead. I’m not going to cripple in emotional pain, but I am very strongly feeling the pain of Crispen’s threat. I
love
him as my best friend.
Loved
him, maybe is more appropriate. How can you love someone who wants to kill you? The pain of losing someone you love is gut-wrenching.

“I’m not about to snap on you, because you’re a demon, Aiden. I’m not going to lose it about that if that’s what you’re wondering. I’m not suddenly on Crispen’s side. I still think he’s wrong,” I blab through a sob. “I’m just so shocked that I wasn’t shocked and angry and so much more the last two months.” What if my father actually
helped
me by using compulsion on me? Has he not saved me emotional pain in doing so? I skipped right over the terrified-to-death stage and skipped on to acceptance. I was able to listen to everything Aiden had to say about demons, and I was able to learn about them without being scared out of my wits and rebelling. I would have tried to run away. My father clearly compelled me to stay, to not be terrified, and to listen to Aiden. None of these are bad things. If I’d have run, I’d have been caught. Being terrified doesn’t help a soul. Listening to Aiden has helped me, not hurt anything. I’m so confused. I don’t know what to think.

Aiden sighs in relief.

“There’s also this thing where I’m either going to have to give up my soul or commit suicide,” I point out. This is also playing a large role in my tears.

“Yeah, there’s that,” he mutters. “There is a third option, but it’s no better. At least I don’t think so. Since you have human blood in your veins you
could
become a hunter and kill demons, hunters retain their souls. You’d be hunted, but if you stuck around Crispen you’d probably be safe. Not many demon’s choose to take his family on. They’re too strong.”

He’s saying that by choosing Crispen’s side and becoming a hunter, I could live and get back on good terms with Crispen and his family, but I’d have to kill. I’d have to kill demons like Aiden for the rest of my life. I’d have an inescapable urge to attack every single demon I sensed. This doesn’t seem like much of an option either. Plus, why would I want to choose Crispen’s side after all of this? Why would I want to team up with him?

I don’t realize that I’ve stopped walking until Aiden stands in front of me, places his hands on my shoulders, and kisses my forehead lightly. His last action surprises me a little, but I’m too upset to question it. “I’ve only known you for a couple of months, but if I know one thing about you, Megan, it’s that you’re strong.”

“I might have been strong before you gave my emotions back, but I’m not anymore.”

He shakes his head. “No, you’re still the same person, just more human. That’s a good thing, not a bad thing. Don’t forget that. Emotion is strength.”

I’m not so sure. How can I be strong when my life is about to end or change drastically in the next few months? I’ve jumped a lot of hurdles in my life, but this one is by far the highest one yet.

“Master! Master!” one of the guards shouts while running around to our side of the house. It’s Terry. Aiden’s eyes dart from mine to the guard, as he turns. I see worry flash upon his face.

“What is it, Terry?” Aiden bursts, his tone changing from soft and caring to business-like. He must feel the tension that the guard has brought with him as I have.

“Hunters. Hunters are here. Get into the house for safety until we eradicate the problem.” The guard and Aiden share a look that I don’t understand.

“How many are there?” Aiden asks, hesitating.

“I believe there are four, sir. They’ve been spotted outside the grounds and will be reaching the front gate at any moment. You should hurry. One of the guards mentioned that they could be the same hunters who have been killing all the demons in the area lately. They’ve nearly killed three hundred, Mr. Castile, sir, go now or you could be next.”

I’ve never seen Terry so worried. He and Aiden share a strange look almost like they’re have a silent conversation. Aiden nods as if he gets the message that Terry is trying to send. I have no idea what either of them is trying to say to one another.

This is news to me. Hunters have been attacking demons around here? Is that normal? It doesn’t sound like it. I know that Toronto is one of the biggest hubs for demons. Many live here, because one of the five gates to hell is near here.

“Terry, secure Megan in the house, I will take your position out front. I believe I know exactly what these hunters have come for.”

Terry, technically being owned by Aiden, is not able to refuse Aiden’s demands. He looks to Aiden with a look of confusion and worry and then comes forward to usher me into the house. He seems to notice then that I’m crying and offers me a black handkerchief. I take it thankfully and wipe my face as we run into the house. I like Terry. He’s been good company. The three of us, Aiden, he, and I play a game of cards almost every night. He’s very professional though, he won’t talk much about his personal life, unless I push which I don’t like doing.

“I won’t be long,” Aiden promises, shooting me a half smile and sprinting in the opposite direction. By sprinting, I mean running at a human’s sprinting pace, not a demon’s.

“Come, lady Caplan,” Terry instructs and holds the door open for me. Once inside, I gaze out of the window searching for signs of the hunters. Part of me wonders if the hunters arriving are Crispen and his family. He did say in his letter that he’d give me until tonight, but why would he attack a place guarded to heavily just to kill me? It doesn’t make sense.

“I would suggest you stay away from the windows, ma’am. It isn’t safe.”

I don’t listen to Terry. I can’t even see anything. After a moment, I watch Aiden appear at the front of the house with the other guards. In a matter of seconds, Aiden is thirty or forty feet ahead of the guards, his arms appearing to be crossed. I look ahead of him and four figures dressed in pure black stand before him. I see the glint of knives in their hands and suck in a breath. Terry comes to the window after hearing my reaction and clears his throat.

“Four hunters is many. They are trained in ways that we are not, given instincts that we’re not, but we have many guards, and Aiden is a very well trained fighter. Twenty-four against four is the same as six against one. They do not stand a chance,” Terry reassures me, but he looks uneasy, and I wonder if it’s because Aiden has decided to take his place outside. I wonder why Aiden’s done this. It doesn’t take me long to come up with an answer. Aiden said before that he wished not to have all of these guards. He probably feels badly that they are all risking their lives for his safety. I know I would feel that way. My two guards Hermus and Vandike are out there right now. If I die, I feel like their blood will be on my hands. Panic starts to wash over me.

“What is he doing?” I ask. Terry knows that I’m referring to Aiden.

He shrugs.

I shake my head at Aiden’s actions. I don’t blame him for doing what he’s doing, but I’m still worried about his safety. “Many of Aiden’s guards have fallen at the hands of hunters, but Aiden’s always survived. Do not worry for his safety, Megan, but I hope for everyone else’s sakes that these hunters are not the same ones who attacked last time or any of the times before. I have just recently been assigned to Aiden in the last few months. He goes through guards like…like crazy. Many changelings give up their lives protecting him.”

I gulp. That doesn’t sound good. From what I’ve learnt, it’s apparent that when someone is made into a changeling, they feel a sense of loyalty to pure bloods in general, but especially to their maker or
sire
. They guard or serve their sire until death. If their sire dies before they do, then they are thrown into a pile and distributed to a new ‘master’, or they pick a new one by choosing the first pure blood they lay eyes on. A changeling must listen to their master no matter what. It’s engrained in them like a compulsion to obey whoever they are assigned to. The only person who can overrule a master’s word to their changeling is the demon of purest blood. The strongest demon alive at this time is some guy named Lucian, who kind of seems like an ass from what I’ve read.

“How many guards were there last time Aiden was attacked?” I ask wearily.

“Eighteen. There were eighteen guards.”

“So there are six more now?” I ask for reassurance.

Terry’s face drops a little. “Well, this is true, but there was also one less hunter. I see that there are four outside as we speak.”

“I thought you said that they didn’t stand a chance,” I state confused. My tears have stopped falling now, because I’m distracted by the scene in front of me.

“I did, yes. Those hunters
don’t
stand a chance, not unless they are the hunters who have been after Mr. Castile nearly all his life. There are only three of those hunters.”

“What makes
those
hunters so special, more lethal?” I ask, still not understanding what he’s saying.

“The hunters that attacked last time and many of the times before, they were the original hunters. The first to be made. You would be correct in assuming that they are
lethal,
ma’am. They’re nearly unstoppable,” Terry says grimly, a dramatic tone in his voice. He’s talking about Crispen’s family. They’ve been after Aiden his entire life? Why? I mean obviously because he’s a demon, but why after years of obviously failing, are they still after him? Why haven’t they given up if they haven’t killed him yet?

“Why have they been after Aiden all this time?”

“He’s their step brother. Well, sort of.”

No, that can’t be right. There wasn’t another sibling. I go back to the stories that Crispen’s family told me months ago. Not once was a step brother ever mentioned or a ‘sort of’ step brother whatever that means.

“Are you sure?” I ask incredulously. “How is he a demon and they hunters then?”

“The Ranchiller’s father Thomas Desmond was married once, before he married their mother Anna. The woman he was married to prior to his remarriage, had an eight year old son who was not biologically his. The boy Aiden had no known relatives to care for him after his mother’s murder, so Thomas raised him for his deceased wife. Thomas married Anna, then Crispen, Mason, and Aria were born. Aiden was raised alongside the Ranchiller children as their older brother. Of course, the three hunters were human at the time and Aiden’s true heritage was unknown by everyone except for himself. Aiden’s mother told him what he was when he was young, she had to of course as human children and pure demon children are far from alike. He played the part of human until his distant demon relatives found him and took him away from his human family, killing both Thomas and Anna in the process. Aiden was 26. Little did Aiden know his entire life, that he was part of a royal demon family, his mother escaped with him after giving birth to him, because she wanted him to have a better life out of the demon world. I suppose that the original hunters blame him for their parents’ death.”

I glance to Terry who looks deep in though, then I look back outside. Like Aiden trained me to do, I watch closely, ready to follow any move that’s made. Focus is the key to tracking the hunter and demon’s quick movements. If you don’t pay close attention, it looks like they’re disappearing and reappearing magically that’s how fast they move. I notice that Aiden doesn’t seem to have a weapon and this bothers me. How is he going to fight?
What is he doing?

If Aiden was once like a brother to Aria, Mason, and Crispen and Crispen killed Aiden’s daughter, then that’s almost like Crispen killing his own niece. I remember the tortured pain in Aiden’s eyes when Crispen told me he’d killed Aiden’s daughter. He looked like someone had just stabbed him in the chest. Now I realize that it wasn’t just the pain of Crispen killing his daughter, it was the pain of his own brother killing his daughter. Uneasiness rolls in my chest, as I become sickened by the mere thought of Crispen. If I ever had feelings for him, they’re completely and irrevocably gone in this instant. I cannot care for someone so heartless. How did I not see the real him in all of the time I spent with him? Demon or not, I could never kill my own niece.

“How can a child hide being a demon for so long?” I ask Terry. “What about his eyes?”

Terry chuckles. “When pure humans see a demon’s eyes, they look like regular human eyes, Megan. As for behavior, demons mature faster than human children. At age eight, Aiden was more mature than many human adults are. Plus, many things like a demon’s special
talents
don’t appear until they consume their first soul. The need to consume a soul comes after they make their first kill.”

Outside, Aiden looks to be conversing with the hunters, and I have no doubt that Crispen is one of the four. The thought of him being so close to me makes me want to run outside and kick his ass, though I know I wouldn’t even stand a chance.

As my attention wanes, I realize that I’ve missed movement out front. Aiden is no longer facing the four in black. He seems to be missing completely. The front door opens, and he struts into the room tossing a long knife around like it’s not sharp. I know for a fact that it is very, very sharp.

“Megan, get away from the window, please,” he instructs, minor panic on his face when he sees where I’m positioned. It’s more alarm than panic.

“I suggested that she move. She didn’t listen,” Terry informs him quickly. I step back from the window.

“I was right. Crispen is here, and he seems to be here for you and not me this time, though I’m sure he’d like to have us both,” Aiden says and then sighs with frustration. “You’ll be fine as long as you stay inside. I won’t let them past me and into the house. I can promise you that.”

“Master, would you like me to go outside now and fight with my brothers?” Terry asks hopefully, as if he doesn’t like being cooped up in here while they fight for their lives.

Aiden debates this, glancing from me to the door, as if he’s torn between fighting and staying with me. “Yes, please, Terry,” he decides.

How can Aiden stand all of these people fighting for him, risking their lives for him? It pains me to know that the guards are risking their lives for
me
. I’m not in any way special. My life isn’t worth any more than their own, not by my standards anyway.

“Megan, you need to go into the spare bedroom at the end of the left wing. In the closet is a cellar door. Stay down there, until I come get you when it’s safe. I’m going to make sure that no one gets through the door,” Aiden says in a rush and points in the direction he wants me to go.

“I’m not going anywhere, Aiden. I’m not going to let twenty-five people risk their lives for me. That’s just nuts. I’ll go out there and give myself up,” I say before even thinking about it. It’s the truth. I can’t let these people die for me. Especially not twenty-five of them that’s not even including the servants around here, and surely their lives are also in danger.

Aiden seems almost surprised by my rebuttal, like he didn’t expect me to argue. Of course he didn’t. I
never
argue with him. I’m pretty sure that I was compelled not to.

“These guards live for this, Megan. This is their life, their duty. They were all assigned to me by head office. If they weren’t assigned to me, then they’d be assigned to someone far more terrible. They train years for this. It’s their life. They choose protecting people like us over being a servants. You saw Terry, they all
want
to do this, they need to do this,” Aiden tries to convince me. I know he’s right. It’s the main purpose for their existence. It
is
what they live for. It’s why changelings are a thing, why they exist. I’ve read enough about them to know this.

Aiden senses my confusion. “Haven’t you read enough books to know this?” he asks, a small smile peeking through. He’s always making fun of me for reading so much. It’s not my fault that there’s so much to learn. “They will instinctually die for a pure blood without even thinking twice about it. They’re honored to fight and give their lives for us.”

I’m not technically a pure blood, not yet at least, but since I was born with demon blood in my veins, I have the potential to become a pure blood simply by letting go of my soul. Changelings have no demon blood, they just lack a soul, this is what makes them lower than pure bloods and myself.

I have the pure demon gene, but it will remain dormant until I lose my soul. No ritual needs to be done for me. If Aiden ever slipped up and accidentally pulled out my soul, that’d be it for me, I’d be a demon.

Aiden was born without a soul. How unlucky. He never had the choice that I have. I never really thought about this before. I’ve never thought myself lucky for getting a choice.

As I’m wasting time debating all of this stupidly, things outside must get intense because someone dressed in black comes flying right through the front door, just missing Aiden and ramming into a wall, knocking picture frames onto the floor and smashing them. I gasp, and Aiden turns to greet our guest. Holy mother of Jesus.

Mason stands, wiping himself off and pulling a blade from his thigh like it’s nothing. “Christ, what are you feeding them guards, hormones?” Mason spews, spitting out what I presume is dirt, though it could very well be wood from the splintered door, onto the ground.

“Get out of my house, Mason, you’ve only been in here a mere moment, and you’ve managed to destroy the place,” Aiden mutters, sounding bored and annoyed.

“
Whaaat?
You didn’t miss me?” Mason pokes. “That’s alright, I haven’t missed you much either.” Mason moves impossibly fast, positioning his dagger above Aiden’s head. He’s about to bring it down when Aiden easily kicks his legs out from under him, knocking him to the floor with a bang.

“You know you’re no match for me, Mason,” Aiden groans. Instead of attacking Mason further, he watches him get up.