Hanging On (19 page)

“No, it’s just Danny and me. We’re ten months apart. Irish twins.”

“I’m Irish on my mother’s side.”

“My parents are both Italian. Mom didn’t think she could get pregnant so soon after giving birth. She made Dad get a vasectomy right after I was born.” She fished in his cupboards for red wine and cinnamon. Without consulting him or measuring in any way, she added them to the sauce. It was the way her mother taught her to make tomato sauces. She didn’t even think about the consequences of messing with the contents of a professional chef’s pot.

They talked as they cooked, their movements falling into perfect synchronization as he ceded control of the sauce. She barely noticed as he guided the conversation to the kinds of stories about the past that reveal things about who a person is deep inside. Before she knew it, Sophia told him about how she used to put makeup on Daniel while he was asleep and the way her family still gathered together the last Sunday of each month for a huge dinner and a gluttonous quantity of dessert, which they had both before and after the actual meal.

She couldn’t remember the last time she felt so relaxed around anyone.

With practiced panache, Drew plated the meal and they dined, sitting on the high chairs at the counter. He had a ton of wine in his fancy wine rack, and a large wine cellar in the basement, but he poured water for them both.

She didn’t question his action, deducing he saved the wine for special occasions.

His Hawaiian Chicken was delicious. It was more than chicken smothered in tomato sauce and garnished with pineapple. She didn’t see everything he did to it, but there were a lot of steps. She couldn’t imagine making it after watching a half hour tutorial.

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The expression on his face morphed from trepidation to surprise pretty quickly. “This is perfect.” He lingered over the next mouthful, analyzing the sauce with his taste buds. Finally, he looked at her. “It’s the wine. It gives the sauce a tanginess that goes well with the sweetness of the pineapple.” She nodded slowly. “It’s how my mom makes spaghetti sauce.” He kissed her, hard. “I knew there was something I liked about you, other than the embers that shimmer from you every time you look at me.” They cleaned up after dinner. Mostly, Drew told her what to do, and she did it. If she had known her way around his kitchen a little better, she would have bristled under his direction.

Then again, maybe she wouldn’t have. He was a natural leader, exactly the type of person Sophia usually avoided. There were so many things about him she liked, both in and out of the bedroom. It should have scared her more than it did. She felt the subtle shift in her psyche, the temporary easing of her need to be in control.

He asked her to trust him. Little by little, she was giving him pieces of something she kept locked inside, safe from the world at large.

This wouldn’t last.

Dressed only in his thin, blue robe, he made the trip out to her car to retrieve the bag she left on the floor of the backseat. He’d asked her to stay in the kitchen. She nursed a cup of the mint tea with honey he insisted she have instead of the coffee with lots and lots of sugar she wanted.

Before too long, he returned. One by one, he laid out the selection of toys on the counter. “You must have planned to stay for a week,” he muttered.

She might have taken offense if he hadn’t sounded so pleased about it.

“A week? Who would feed my imaginary cat?” He laughed and rubbed nervously at his shoulder. She was adept at reading that kind of body language.

“Drew? You never answered my question earlier.” Glancing up, he raised his brows. “If we’re keeping score, you avoided several of my questions, too.”

She sipped her tea to cover a grimace. “Mine was in regard to Christopher tomorrow,” she prompted. “Did you want me to get him started before you come over, or do you enjoy watching me dominate someone else?”

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He shrugged, his eyes never leaving the array of toys spread on the counter. “As long as you don’t fuck him, I don’t care what you do to him before I get there.”

“Drew? What’s wrong?”

He picked up a short toy with a bulbous head. “I’ve seen vibrators before, but I have no idea what this one is. It doesn’t look like the one I pulled from Livia’s ass the other night.” With a gentle smile, she rounded the counter and explained the selection she brought. She hadn’t chosen them with any degree of care. Running short on time forced her to dump an entire box into her carryall bag. The device Drew held was a clitoral stimulator, as were several of those on the counter.

Others were regular, no-frills vibrators. Then there were combination toys, vibrators with clitoral stimulators.

“What’s this?” He handed her a combination toy. The parts that were the phallus and the clit stimulator were easy to identify. Another spike curled away from the base, one-inch beads stretching the length at intervals.

“That’s for anal stimulation.”

He regarded it thoughtfully. “Have you ever used this?” Sophia shook her head. For all the kinky things she did to her submissives, she was a virgin when it came to many of them.

Next, he lifted a set of adjustable straps. “What’s this?”

“That’s for the strap-ons,” she explained, pointing to several phalluses that lacked battery power and to a couple that were dual use.

He quirked his eyes at her. “That was thoughtful, honey, but I come equipped with the built-in model.”

She ran a suggestive finger down his chest, loosening the front of his robe until it hung open. “That’s for me to use on you. I don’t think you know how much the idea of fucking you from behind turns me on.” Reaching between her legs, she dipped a finger into the wetness there and raised her fingertip, full of thick cream, to his lips.

Without hesitating, his mouth opened. He sucked the evidence of her arousal from her finger, scraping it clean with his teeth. He released it to answer her challenge. “It probably turns you on as much as watching you masturbate makes me have to strain not to come in my pants, or my robe, as the case may be.”

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Without breaking eye contact, she eased herself onto the cold marble in front of him. It was a split-level counter. The side at which she had been seated, sipping tea, was higher. The side where Drew arranged the vibrators was hip level for kitchen work.

She settled her rear on the higher counter and braced her feet on the lower one. Licking her lips to moisten them and drive him crazy, she tugged at the tie on her robe. The pliant silk slid from her shoulders to lay forgotten behind her.

Using both hands, she pushed her knees apart, spreading them as far as they would go. Drew wasn’t breathing, and his dick stood at attention.

“Put your hands on the counter,” she said. Without hesitation, he did as she directed. “Good. If you lift them or move them at all, I will stop.” He didn’t move or speak. She wanted to love that he was so well trained, but she had a sinking suspicion that he would be compliant only as long as it suited him.

With one hand, she fingered the folds of her pussy. Drew’s attention centered there, watching as if she had ordered him not to move his eyes. She moved her other hand along the length of her inner thigh, caressing the sensitive skin there. Fingers splayed, she continued up her abdomen to cup one breast. She pinched the nipples lightly, tweaking them to peaks with a gentle pressure.

She brought herself to the panting point before letting her hands drop away.

Drew made a sound of protest, which she quickly silenced by reaching forward and snagging a pink silicone vibrator. She held it next to his hard-on, comparing sizes. Drew’s dick was long and thick. While the vibrator was comparable in length, it wasn’t as thick. She replaced it and selected another, one as close to his size and shape as she could find.

The one she ultimately chose was bright blue. Drew’s eyes smoldered, and the thick, corded muscles of his neck and shoulders stood out with the effort it took to keep his hands still.

The tube of lubricant was out of reach. She would have to abandon her pretty pose in order to get it. With the tilt of her head, she indicated it.

“Would you be so kind as to hand that here?”

“You said if I move my hands, you’ll stop.” He sounded as if he had just run a marathon.

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Visually, she remeasured the distance. There was no way he could reach it with his mouth. “One hand for this one purpose.” He held the tube out to her, unscrewing the cap with his thumb and forefinger, as if she needed a reminder of how good he was with his hands.

She held up the length of blue silicone while he squeezed the clear gel along the shaft.

With slow-moving fingers, she spread it, thoroughly lubricating the entire thing. The excess found its way to her entrance. She rubbed the edges of the little, pink hole until she gasped involuntarily, and then slid her slippery fingers inside, though she didn’t really need the extra wetness. The look on Drew’s face was reward enough.

Sophia’s vibrators were her best friends, quiet lovers that did exactly what she wanted without questions or expectations. More than that, she loved the feel of them inside. She rubbed the slippery, pulsating tip around her clit before plunging it deep inside with one powerful stroke. Both of them stopped breathing.

Drew’s fingers curled, pressing into the hard, flat surface until the tips turned white. Strain showed on his face. She positioned the shorter arm of the vibrator against her clit and turned the dial to medium. Drew’s lower lip disappeared into his mouth. Knowing the exact extent as to the magic skills residing there, she envied that lip he bit and sucked.

She moved the phallus around inside her, concentrating the tip and the vibrations against the places that made her knees tremble and sent electricity through her synapses. Her breaths came faster and shallower as her hips thrust harder and faster. Bracing her weight behind her on one hand, she let her head fall back.

“God, Sophia, you are so unbelievably beautiful. Delicate and strong, fragile and tough. You’re open to me, yet completely off-limits. I want to spend the rest of my life peeling back your layers, discovering all your secrets.”

His voice was low and reverent, tight with need. The tone drove her higher, though the meaning of his words wouldn’t penetrate until much, much later, when it would be easy to dismiss them as the ramblings of an aroused man.

The heat spiraled out of control, coiling her body tighter and tighter until she cried out. Rigid, and in the throes of an orgasm, Sophia didn’t

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protest when Drew reached for her. Strong hands gripped her hips as he lifted her closer. One hand cradled her head, fingers threading through her hair to hold her still while he nipped at her docile lips.

The other hand brushed hers away from the vibrator, which he now controlled. Turning it to a higher setting, he pushed it into her steadier and with more force than she had been able to muster. Her senses overloaded, and she beat against Drew with her fists, fighting for control.

Kisses rained on her temple and brow. “Don’t fight it, Sophie. Hang on to me, and let it come. I’ve got you, honey. I’ve got you. All you have to do is hang on.”

That kernel of trust she loaned him earlier returned, bigger and stronger because he hadn’t abused it. She buried her face in his neck and dug her fingers into his biceps. Colors exploded behind her eyelids, and she screamed.

Feeling left for a little while, but she was hyperaware of certain sensations. Drew’s arms were around her, stroking the hair at her temple as she quivered against him. He murmured words against the top of her head, nonsense about her beauty and strength. His chest was pressed against hers.

His erection waited patiently against her thigh.

Finally, she lifted her head and kissed him slowly. She meant it to thank him for using her trust well, but it morphed into something more. If she wanted to face facts, he was telling her with every fiber of his being that he loved her. But she didn’t want to face facts. They were cold and hard and led only to devastation. She had survived a betrayal of these proportions before, but she didn’t have it in her to do it again.

Still, her traitorous body returned his affection until she finally broke the kiss.

Drew regarded her with a lopsided grin, and he held up the strap-on harness.

She wasn’t overly surprised. He was bisexual and a switch-hitter. The kinds of sex they’d been having for the past two weeks wouldn’t fulfill all of his needs.

“Are you sure about this?” She wasn’t hesitant, but she did want clear consent.

He nodded. “If you’re going to be everything to me, then I want you to be everything to me.”

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She stepped into the straps of the harness and secured it around her legs, hips, and waist. He handed her the dildo he wanted her to use and turned, positioning himself against the counter.

“By that logic, you’re going to want to do the same thing to me.” She managed to sound composed, but in reality she was nervous. She enjoyed his touch at her back entrance earlier, but it was a relatively small intrusion.

“Yes, but not until you’re ready.”

He sounded so sure, so confident about something she had done to others, but she had never allowed to be done to herself. Not even one of the plentiful back-door pleasure vibrators still arrayed on the counter had been inside her own anus. She was thankful he hadn’t caught the shock on her face. “Tell me how you want it, Drew. Tell me what you like.”