Hanging On (27 page)

If a woman only came for one session, or if she came sporadically, she could still reap the benefits and not feel like she was missing something when she missed a session. Guilt wasn’t an emotion she was looking to add to anyone’s load.

Daniel provided the private room for the counseling and the training, but he avoided intruding on the counseling, correctly assuming the women wouldn’t talk with a man in the room.

Sophia was glad because she knew reliving the telling of her experience was just as torturous for him as it was for her.

Drew blinked at her. “Class? I thought you worked Wednesdays.”

“I do,” she said, finishing her sandwich. “I teach a self-defense class for women who’ve been victims of violence. It’s a free class, and we have a grant to pay for counselors to be on hand before and after. We’ve been able to find the money to provide child care as well.” That was the best idea so far, and she credited Daniel with it. Children weren’t a concern that ever crossed her mind. Last winter, Daniel casually

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mentioned he thought more women would come more consistently if they knew they could bring their kids and not worry about them while they’re doing what they need to do. He’d even researched the grants.

Alaina had been Daniel’s date. That’s how Sophia knew her. She was the new counselor who started in May. The new grant was tied into a research project headed by Dr. Alaina Miles. That’s where Daniel met her.

Sophia wondered if Alaina knew about Danny’s hidden depths, and then quickly jettisoned the thought. Even if she did, he’d obviously been nasty to her during the date. It was completely unlike Daniel, but every guy was entitled to a bad day.

During her musings, Drew stared, his expression carefully neutral. “You teach it by yourself?”

“Daniel helps. It’s kinda hard to demonstrate self-defense as a theory.” Daniel was her punching bag. He helped choreograph likely attack scenarios and Sophia showed the women that they didn’t have to be afraid of a man who was both bigger and stronger. Being her brother, Daniel didn’t spare Sophia, though he did find some of the scenes more uncomfortable than the others. Demonstrating how to fend off a rape was the worst for him, but he never complained and he never went easy on her.

With a brief nod, Drew pushed to standing and cleared away evidence of lunch. “If you ever need a counselor, that’s the kind of thing my mom loves to do. She used to spend a lot of time volunteering in women’s shelters, but now that she’s not practicing anymore, she’s not as connected as she once was.”

Sophia bit her lip to staunch an outright rejection. Miranda Snow was too perceptive by half. “Maybe she doesn’t want to be connected anymore.

It’s not an easy topic. Maybe she retired to get away from it.”

“Maybe,” he agreed. “Still, it never hurts to ask.”

“I’ll keep that in mind in case we run short on counselors.” Who was she kidding? The grant covered the fee of one counselor before the lesson and one after. Occasionally, they benefitted from a batch of doctoral candidates needing field time, but that was a seasonal thing, and it came with lots of paperwork for Sophia. Women weren’t victims only when service credits were needed. Every two minutes, someone in the United States was the victim of sexual assault.

Volunteers would be more than welcome.

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She needed to get over herself. This wasn’t about her.

Drew didn’t push the issue, and he let Sophia change the subject. She turned it toward his schedule for the rest of the week. With a string of appearances up and down the Pacific Coast, book signings, demonstrations, and parties, which he called meet and greets, he was going to be a very busy person.

When she kissed him good-bye, he admonished her to not spend all her time buried in paperwork.

“I like being buried in paperwork,” she said, defending her antisocial bliss. The contents of this office might give Ginny nightmares, but it was a pleasant dream for Sophia.

“I can see that.” He smiled. “However, you need to get out of the house.

How long has it been since you’ve had one of your girls’ nights out?” Cocking her head to the side, she looked at him quizzically. While she joined Sabrina and Ellen for a drink after Sabrina’s sessions, and she knew they got together with Ginny and Lara and frequently Jonas’s sisters for what they termed a “girls’ night out,” Sophia had never been part of that ritual. Sabrina didn’t usually schedule time with Sophia during those nights.

“I’m not really part of all that.”

He frowned. “Why not?”

“I work Friday nights.” Working Friday nights was how she knew about their monthly habits at all. Jonas used to work Fridays with her. He was always a ball of tension whenever his wife was out painting the town with Ellen. At the time, he was keeping his real job there a secret from Sabrina, and he was afraid Ellen would slip and tell her. Sabrina already knew and she had met Sophia, but nothing would have induced Sophia to reveal that piece of information. It wouldn’t have brought him any relief.

Drew’s frown remained. “I don’t understand. I know you’re not that close with Ginny, but I thought you and Sabrina were good friends.”

“We are.” This was the point where he expected an explanation of the nature of her relationship with Sabrina. That was Sabrina’s business to divulge, not Sophia’s.

After a minute, his nostrils flared as he realized she wasn’t going to say more. “You seem pretty close to Ellen. You’ve known her for a number of years, right?”

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“Yes.” She answered his concern in backwards order. “Ellen and I are friends.”

“So, you’ll call her and go out and have some fun?” Sophia’s brows scrunched together. Why did he care what she did while he was gone? Did he think she would stay at home and pine away for him?

“Drew, don’t worry about me. I promise I’ll be fine.” She was still shaking her head Saturday after she finished helping Daniel cover his classes. The same girl had developed a habit of skipping out on Saturdays. He was reluctant to replace her because she was very good.

“She has a new boyfriend,” Daniel said by way of defending her actions.

“It amazes me that she still has a job,” Sophia returned. “I can’t believe you’re seriously putting up with this.” He shrugged, rolling his shoulder as if the motion would push her away.

“If she does it again, I’ll give her a warning.” The acerbic reply died on Sophia’s lips in response to the ringing of her cell phone. It was Sabrina, so she gave up on Danny and took the call.

“Oh, thank God,” she breathed when Sophia answered.

The schedule on the phone’s calendar played through her head. A fitting was scheduled for today, but not for five more hours. Immediately, Sophia was worried. “What’s wrong?”

Her relief turned to a severe case of nerves. “Sophia, is there any way you could come by the house today? I really need to talk to you.” It was a good thing she hadn’t worked up a sweat. Sophia raced to Sabrina’s house without showering. The urgency in her voice didn’t hint at catastrophe, so Sophia didn’t think anyone was hurt, or that she’d lost the baby. But something was wrong.

When she arrived, Jonas was out front trying to remove a tree. A pest had attacked and killed it, so it wasn’t top-heavy with leaves. Still, it was a sizeable job.

She parked in the driveway and paused next to him. He was shirtless and sweaty, which wasn’t a new look since she usually saw him at the Club wearing only jeans and beads of sweat. Not that she meant to, but she mentally compared his physique to Drew’s. She’d always thought Jonas had a nice build. It was similar to Christopher’s, but Jonas was stronger and a little shorter.

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Drew was a little taller than Jonas, and broader in the shoulder. For the first time, Sophia realized a distinct preference for Drew’s bulkier muscles.

“Hey,” he said when he saw her. A gloved hand came up to brush his blond curls away from his face. “I called you yesterday.” She had listened to his message, but not until she checked her phone after work. She had returned Drew’s call, but not Jonas’s. “I’ve been busy,” she said. Indicating the tree he chained to Ryan’s truck, she added, “Looks like you’ve been busy, too.”

“Fucking thing doesn’t want to come out.” Eyeing the situation without sympathy, Sophia shrugged. “You don’t have the right equipment. Want me to call my dad? He can get it out, stump and all, in less time than you’ve already spent trying to move it.” He snapped his fingers. “That’s right. I forgot your dad did landscaping.

I’ve got a rich wife. By all means, hook me up.” In ten minutes, she had her father’s assurance that the tree would be gone by the time Sabrina got home from work on Monday. Jonas wanted the landscaping to look nice for the wedding, which they were having in the backyard. She would have suggested using her father’s full range of services, but she knew how much Jonas loved gardening. With a soft, proud eye, Sabrina had informed everyone that all of the flower gardens were the fruits of Jonas’s labor.

“Where is Sabrina?” If this were Sophia’s house, she would be out front helping with the work.

“You mean, why isn’t she out here getting dirty with me?” The grin on his face should have warned Sophia away from the topic.

She nodded.

“She doesn’t like dirt. When the lady of the house has sex with the gardener, she makes him take a shower first.” His grin grew. “Of course, she joins him and makes it a really, really fun shower, but she still makes him clean up for her.”

The dots took a minute to connect in Sophia’s head. She’d forgotten that Jonas liked role-playing as much as he liked having sex in front of an audience. The grin on his face left no doubt as to who did the washing in that scenario.

If Drew came to her sweaty and covered in dirt, Sophia would ravish him before, during, and after the shower, no roles necessary. For the life of

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her, she couldn’t imagine him with smudges of soil and grass on his clothes and chest. Marinara or Alfredo sauce, definitely. Those would need to be licked away. In the bedroom, she couldn’t imagine him being anything other than himself.

“So, what did you want?”

Now, he tilted his head to stare quizzically at her.

An impatient sigh zinged past her lips. “You called last night. Sabrina called this morning. She said she needed to talk to me. It sounded urgent.” His face assumed that guarded look she knew all too well. He lifted a hand to indicate she should follow him around the house. “Before you see Sabrina, you should know I haven’t told her anything about your past that you wouldn’t want me to tell her.”

“But?” It was there, dangling silently from his declaration.

“But she’s been asking a lot of questions, and she knows I’m not telling her all the answers. Drew called her yesterday and the day before. They talked for a long time both nights. She’s tried to get information from Ellen, but Ellen’s even better at stonewalling her than I am.” Behind him, Sophia tensed. “Jonas.” It was as close to a plea as she could manage.

He led her to a refrigerator in the garage and snagged two beers. “Help me finish these.”

She took the one he handed her, but she didn’t open it. The unused pregnancy test was still in her purse. Her period was late, but that wasn’t unusual.

Jonas twisted the lid from his and tossed it in an open trash bin.

“Sabrina’s in the pool. She always swims when she’s anxious. She’ll be out soon.”

“Why is she anxious?” And what the hell had Drew said to her? Sophia put the beer back in the refrigerator, exchanging it for water.

“I hear things are going well with you and Drew.” The look she gave him was enough to let him know the change in subject wasn’t going to last. “Yes and no.”

“No? Tell me about that.” He leaned against a workbench along the inside wall of the garage.

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“It’s none of your business.” Really, what did he expect? He used to be just as closed to new relationships. Just because falling in love changed his perspective didn’t mean it changed hers.

“You’re my friend.” That iron stare fell on her, but it wasn’t effective.

Sophia waited, but he said nothing more. “It’s still none of your business. I’ve been honest with Drew. I can’t help it if he’s stubborn and won’t listen to me.”

“Honest, how? I know you didn’t tell him anything significant.” He patted the bench next to him. Like a good girl, she obeyed his command.

She would have been upset with both the gesture and her response if he hadn’t made it obvious he only wanted her closer to have a quiet conversation.

“I told him I was mentally unstable, and he should get out now. I told him it wouldn’t end well, and that it would definitely end.” He chuckled softly, mirthlessly. “Then you kissed his cheek and sent him off to Los Angeles for four days.”

“I tried breaking it off, but it didn’t work.” She wanted to say he didn’t take no for an answer, but that wasn’t entirely true. He didn’t believe her when she pushed him away. Or his ego was too large to believe she could mean it when she rejected him. Or he was incredibly stubborn and single-minded. “I don’t understand what he would have to say to Sabrina. When he left, things were fine.”

A shadow caught her attention. Looking up, Sophia spied Sabrina standing in the open door to the garage. She wore a pink swimsuit, the serious kind, not the sunbathing kind. Over it, she had thrown some kind of white terrycloth wrap that was wet from her body. “Is this a private conversation, or am I invited?”