Hard to Handle (12 page)

And she didn’t want to look any needier (if that was possible). The last blow to her stinging ego would be Aiden rejecting her again. She could hear it now:
Are you
still
trying to get me to sleep with you?

Aiden sucked in a breath and rolled over, his hand sliding over his flat stomach, then down to the impressive bulge hiding beneath the confines of his underwear. He adjusted himself and Sadie stared, mouth open, hand clutching her throat. She bet that part of him was as glorious as the rest of him. Oh, how she’d like to see it. Just once. She licked her lips and his hand moved away, his slightly amused voice slicing into the air.

“You keep looking at me like that and you may get more for breakfast than you bargained for.”

Sadie’s face went hot. She stood and wrapped her robe tighter, her movements jerky, and beelined for the sanctuary of the kitchen. “Want some coffee?”

Aiden caught one of the ties on her robe and pulled her onto his lap, where the part she’d been ogling earlier pressed against her hip. Keeping his hand fisted in the slippery material covering her, he watched her for a few agonizing seconds before his lips, rimmed in a sheen of sexy stubble, formed the words, “I’d love some coffee.”

He released her and Sadie scuttled away like a frightened crab.

She popped the individual plastic coffee container into the single-serve maker and pressed a button, lamenting not having extra steps to busy her hands. The task of pulling out a filter, counting scoops of coffee, and measuring out water would have helped distract her from the fact there was a sexy, aroused man in the other room.

As it was, she could think of nothing but.

Were mornings after always this awkward? Seemed unfair to have an awkward morning after if she didn’t get an exhilarating night before. How did anyone endure this unnerving, skin-vibrating tension?

Get the good part now
, a newly awakened, wanton part of her crowed. Her pragmatic side agreed. She could return to the living room, drop her robe into a pool at her feet. Aiden was obviously ready to go. No doubt he’d be a willing participant in extracurricular morning activities.

Though, things might get weird after…when she had to shower and get ready for work. When he gathered his clothes and tried to make forced conversation as he backed toward the door.

Maybe it was for the best they hadn’t had sex. Made love.

Whichever.

The coffeemaker finished its sputtering and she stared into the dark brew for a few seconds, recalling the morning she and Aiden had shared last summer.

“I take it black.”

She turned to find Aiden standing in her kitchen, feet and chest bare, jeans riding low on his hips. And she was staring. Again. “I remember.”

She slid the mug across the breakfast bar. He brushed his hand against hers as he took it. “Thanks.”

Sadie’s fingers tingled as she made herself a mug. She stared at the brewer rather than allow her eyes to parade around Aiden’s incredibly beautiful bare chest. She didn’t know how much longer she would last. This man was distracting to the nth degree. “You work today?” he asked.

“Yes. Yes I do.” She emptied approximately a gallon of creamer into her mug. “You?”

“Yeah.”

She blew on her coffee, took a sip, drummed her fingernails on the porcelain. Five seconds passed, then five more, circling them like sharks around an injured harp seal.

Aiden broke the tense silence. “Coming into Axle’s?”

Ah, relief. A topic. “For a little while. I want to finish the display.”

“Dad is dropping off my nephew around lunchtime. Care to join us at the park for a little while?”

“Park?”

“Yeah. Cordoned outdoor area with trees, grass, and the occasional jungle gym.”

“Smart aleck.”

Aiden smiled the sexiest smile she’d ever seen. And she bought
People
’s annual Sexiest Man Alive issue religiously. “He likes to play football. He’s only five, but the kid’s got an arm already.”

A park. A park sounded harmless. Especially with a munchkin chaperoning them. She didn’t have plans for lunch, other than eating a container of Yoplait and wrestling her hormones into submission.

“Sure, why not.” She was trying to act casual, but as she lifted her mug and peered at him over the rim, she reconsidered her safety.

Five-year-old or not, with Aiden, a park was never just a park.

A
iden’s rambunctious nephew Lionel, Lyon for short—how cute was that?—tackled Aiden to the ground and roared in triumph. The kid had energy like he’d eaten a bag of Pixy Stix for lunch rather than the half a turkey sandwich and apple slices Aiden had brought for him.

Lyon may have his late mother’s mocha skin and dark hair, but the unique blue-green color of his eyes resembled his uncle’s. Man, he was gonna be a heartbreaker when he grew up. Aiden rolled out from under Lyon and waved his nephew farther out before he threw the ball. Sadie admired Aiden’s strong legs, the sprinkling of fair hair, and the way the cutoff gray sweats cupped his butt.

In spite of the cool air, Sadie fanned herself.

“Sadie!” Lyon hollered, bounding over to her and interrupting her R-rated, heading for NC-17, thoughts. She replaced them with Disney-like dancing bears.

“Yes, sir,” she said, “What can I do for you?”

“Catch!” She didn’t think Lyon ever uttered a phrase that didn’t end in exclamation points.

“You bet,” Sadie held out a hand and caught Lyon’s throw smoothly. She lined up her fingers and drew back to throw, feeling Aiden watch her, an eyebrow cocked curiously.

“You don’t look like you need help with that pigskin,” he said, lifting his hands to catch a pass.

Sadie pulled her arm back and tossed the ball, watching the impressive spiral slice through the air. Aiden had to back up a few steps and lift his arms over his head to catch it. His shirt to rode up, flashing a stomach abbreviated by a damn sexy belly button. God bless her twenty-twenty vision. She would have hated to miss that sight for a pair of imperfect peepers.

“She’s awesome!” Lyon hollered, throwing himself to the ground again.

Aiden jogged over to where she stood. “Yeah, I know.” His eyes flickered to her mouth and her lips tingled. “Where’d you learn to throw like that?”

She shrugged a shoulder. “Oh, you know…”

Lyon tugged on Aiden’s shirt, breaking their intense eye contact. “I’m throwing it,” Lyon instructed, pointing at the ball. “You tackle Sadie, Uncle A.”

“It’s not nice for boys to tackle girls,” Aiden said, casting Sadie a sideways glance.

“I don’t know about that,” she said. That got his full attention.

Lyon ran back, ball in hand and turned. Aiden bent, hands on his knees, and Sadie narrowed her eyes at him and prepared to catch it before he did. Lyon’s throw was short. The football hit the ground, wobbling in three directions at once.

Sadie reached the ball first, but as her hand grazed one pointed tip, Aiden lashed an arm around her waist and fell to the ground, bracing her fall with his body. The air whooshed from her lungs, and Sadie laughed. Before she knew how, Aiden had rolled her onto her back in the grass and straddled her.

Her laughter ebbed into a soft
hmm
.

“Gotcha,” Aiden said.

She’d say.

Aiden lowered his head, taking her waiting lips in his. Sadie went loose beneath him, darting her tongue out and tasting the Coca-Cola lingering on his lips. He pulled away from her, something intense dancing in his eyes.

“Sadie,” he murmured. “I—”

“What are you doing?” Lyon interrupted.

Aiden rolled to one side, leaving Sadie like a tree split by lightning. Sadie sat up and brushed grass from her hair and skirt.

“I, uh, was tackling her like you told me to,” Aiden said. He stood and offered Sadie his hand. She took it, loving the buzz of electricity that shot up her arm on contact.

“Looks like kissing to me,” Lyon grumbled, clearly unimpressed.

“How do you know what kissing looks like?” Aiden asked, winking at Sadie.

“Daddy kisses our neighbor sometimes,” Lyon said with a shrug.

Aiden made a funny face and Sadie cracked up, holding her stomach as she laughed. She couldn’t remember a time she’d felt lighter.

She wanted the feeling to last as long as possible.

They walked the short distance from the park to Axle’s, Lyon insisting on walking between them, his hands in theirs. Aiden cradled the football and Sadie carried the food bag, and every once in a while, Aiden would look over Lyon’s head and smile at her.

She wondered if she would have moments like this with her own niece or nephew when Celeste had the baby, or if the gaping distance between them would only widen.

In the parking lot, Aiden crossed to a car and a man got out. He was Aiden’s height and build, with longish mostly gray hair and a scar on the side of his face. Lyon let go of Sadie’s and Aiden’s hands and yelled, “Grampa!” The man embraced Lyon, a proud grin on his rugged face.

“I’m going to go in.” Sadie gestured toward the store.

“Not yet.” Aiden clasped her hand and tipped his head in his father’s direction. She tensed as they approached and Aiden must have noticed. He squeezed her hand and pulled her close. “Dad.”

Sadie couldn’t tell if the older man was happy about his son holding her hand or not.

“This is my dad, Mike.” Aiden nodded at his dad. “This is Sadie.”

Mike’s face split into a smile, and the scar on his face pinched beneath his sunglasses.

Sadie tried not to stare. “Nice to meet you.”

“Never thought I’d meet you,” Mike said with a sideways smile reminding her of Aiden’s.

“He means he’s glad to finally meet you.” Aiden shot his dad a warning look.

“Yeah. Was sorry to miss Shane’s wedding. Couldn’t make it down.” He pointed to his face. “Freak muffin tin accident.”

“Dad,” Aiden mumbled.

“I kid.” Mike’s mouth curved. “It was a pizza cutter.” Sadie allowed herself a laugh. Clearly that was Mike’s goal. Before Aiden could reprimand him again, he said, “I hear it was a nice wedding.”

“Very,” she agreed, feeling guilty all over again for the way she’d ignored Aiden. A fresh wave of embarrassment crashed over her when she recalled how much she’d drunk, how she’d asked Aiden to undress her. He’d not only undressed her, but redressed her and tucked her in. How could she have been so mean after all he’d done for her?

“You’re as beautiful as he said.” At Aiden’s penetrating stare, Mike only shrugged. “Just tellin’ the truth, son.”

Four hours later, Sadie was sorting through the final box in the warehouse when she caught a glimpse of Goliath out of the corner of her eye. She tipped her head and smiled at the mountain before her. “Hi, Axle.”

“Window looks good,” he said.

“Thank you.” While digging in the warehouse, she’d found the mannequin’s missing arm and a female mannequin wedged in a corner behind some old signage. Sadie arranged the now fully limbed male and his new mate next to the custom Harley, placed a map on the seat, and drew a path with red marker. She accessorized with matching helmets and a stack of Midwest parts recommended for long-distance travel.

She wasn’t sure if the burst of inspiration had come from finding the discarded mannequin, or the fact that hanging around Aiden reminded her how much better everything was with a partner. Either way, the display finally felt right. Complete.

“Well,” Axle said. “Bye.”

With that, Axle Zoller, man of few words, made his exit. Sadie followed him as far as the store when Aiden stopped her in the hallway. Something in his eyes warned her he meant business. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

“Um…no?” She smiled hopefully.

He tipped his head in silent reprimand and turned, walking into Axle’s office at the end of the hall. Never one to chicken out, Sadie followed. Even though she was pretty sure this so-called talk had nothing to do with work. She entered the office and found Aiden fidgeting with a stress ball he’d found on Axle’s desk.

“Shut the door for me?”

Panic pinged around her stomach like ricocheting BBs. She thought back to the park as she closed the door with a
click
. There’d been a moment, a tangible, meaningful moment when Aiden had looked into her eyes and started to say something. Something that started with
I
. She could only hope he wasn’t planning on finishing the phrase with
you
and sliding a four-letter word in between.

I love you
in any form was frightening, but an
I love you
from Aiden would be terrifying. Admitting her feelings when she wasn’t sure what they were would make her more vulnerable to him than ever.

“Lyon’s adorable,” Sadie said to fill the void in the room.

“Yeah, he is a very cool kid.” Aiden looked proud for a second, then his smile dropped. “About last night. I thought…maybe I should try to explain.”

Oh no.
Worse than the park thing. What did he regret? Staying? That she’d eyed him the way a hungry lioness would meat on a hook?

Aiden licked his lips and opened his mouth to speak. Sadie interrupted before he could.

“I know I was aggressive,” she said. “I shouldn’t have…” Shouldn’t have what? She’d kissed him, unsnapped his jeans, asked him to stay. “Been so needy.” She realized that was an apt description.

“No. No, that’s not—”

“I just felt so sure, you know? I mean, I wanted it. I
really
wanted it.”

Aiden gave her an anguished look.

Nervously, she continued. “It was the first time I’d ever—” Oops. Back up. She hadn’t meant to go
there
. “I think I was overly excited.”

“Sadie, I—”

“But propositioning you was wrong. Especially when you weren’t interested in”—she gestured at his crotch with a wave of her hand—“you know. I can understand if you don’t want to—”

“Sadie,” he interrupted again, this time sternly. His expression softened, his eyebrows rising. “Please let me speak.”

Well. She’d tried to head him off. She nodded her reluctant agreement.

Aiden ran a hand through his hair, looking none too happy about whatever he was about to tell her, which made Sadie more nervous. Maybe he’d decided he didn’t want to see her any longer. What if he’d had a change of heart since the park?

“I want to.” Aiden pinned her with a deadly serious look. “Trust me. Where you’re concerned, there isn’t much I
don’t
want to do with you.”

Sadie’s heart beat double time. She reached for her earring, spinning the stud in her ear and trying not to faint. That…might have been the best news she’d heard today.

“But…”

Or not.

“…I promised myself…ah, I sort made a decision.” Aiden dropped the stress ball on the desk and pointed an accusing finger at it. “That thing doesn’t work.” He sent her a sickly smile before sitting on the edge of Axle’s desk and closing his eyes. “I made a decision,” he said, his voice dipping an octave. “That the next time I make love to a woman, she will be the last one.” He opened his eyes. “The last one ever,” he clarified.

Sadie felt her brows lift. “Like…”

“She’ll be my wife,” he said.

“Oh.”

“That probably sounds stupid, doesn’t it?” Aiden stood and paced the short distance from desk to door in Axle’s office. “I went through a lot of crap over the last year. And I thought maybe I’d try to do everything right instead of”—he threw a hand into the air—“effing it all up. I just…kind of wanted to start over.” He winced.

Sadie was going to cry. Or laugh. Or laugh until she cried. “You’re a…a born-again virgin?”

Aiden palmed his neck, looking uncomfortable with the label. Uncomfortable about everything. “Yeah, I guess.”

Sadie laughed, a short, high bark she staunched by clapping a hand over her mouth.

Aiden’s face pinched. “Thanks a lot.”

“No,” She touched his arm, which was as rigid as a steel pipe. “I’m not laughing at you.” But that didn’t stop her from giggling.

Her life was pathetically funny.

“Right.” Aiden turned the doorknob. “Sorry I brought it up.”

When he would have made his escape, Sadie said, “It’s just ironic.” He paused, turned his head. She swallowed and forced herself to continue. “That you aren’t ready. And I am. Finally,” she added quietly.

He narrowed his eyes as if trying to figure her out. Great. Just what she needed, Aiden seeing through her like a recently Windexed windshield. “What do you mean ‘finally’?”

She gulped. “I—nothing. I don’t even know why I said that.”

He released the doorknob and walked over to her. “You mean you wanted to sleep with me at the wedding, but you are finally allowing yourself to admit it?” he asked, arriving at a very wrong conclusion.

“That’s not what I meant by f-finally,” she stammered, lifting her long hair off her neck. “It’s hot in here.”

“Then what did you mean?”

Sadie let go of her hair and flipped it over her shoulder. “Just that I’m ready”—
just say it
and get it over with
—“to have sex.”

“With me,” Aiden said, a smile tickling his lips.

“With anyone!” she said a little too loudly. She picked up a manila folder and fanned her face. Wasn’t she too young for hot flashes?

”Anyone at all, huh?” But Aiden didn’t look offended. He looked amused. The bastard. She fanned harder. She could tell by Aiden’s expression that he thought she was busting his balls, keeping his ego in check.

Sadie
so
wanted to stop having this conversation. And leave Axle’s sweltering office.

“You don’t have to spare my feelings.” Aiden took the folder from her and leaned in. “I get it,” he said, his voice low. “You’re a sexual person.”

“Shh!”

“You have needs.” His lip curved. “And here I am, unwilling to be your boy toy.”

“Dammit, Aiden,” Sadie snatched the folder and slammed it on the desk. Go big or go home, right? “That’s not what I meant.”

Her stern expression knocked the smile of his smug face. Aiden’s lips flattened. “What
do
you mean, Sadie?”

With a Band-Aid-esque tear, she told him the painful truth. “I meant I’m finally ready to sleep with someone for the first time. Ever. In my entire life,” she reiterated to be crystal clear. “And I was hoping that someone would be you.”

Aiden had tried to speak once, twice, but only managed to emit a thin wheeze. He felt as if his throat had been lined with cotton batting, his tongue barricaded by bags of sand.

Was she saying…?