Hard To Love (24 page)

On the day that our son, Jaxon, was born, a tragedy befell our
family. During the hours of our son’s birth, Mason wrapped his
Ferrari around a lamp post and died on the way to the hospital. He
had been drinking . . . unable to get his demons under control,
instead letting them control him.

The funeral was a few days later, and with heavy hearts we
lined up in the room to accept empty sorrow-filled hugs from
people who had known him. Sadly, he would never know how
many people loved and cherished him, including me. Jaxon had
woken and started crying, so I left the room and sat alone in an
empty visiting room. Tears streaked my face.

“Oh
, Mason. Why didn’t you ever ask for help?” I sobbed into
the Kleenex.
“Because I was stubborn,” he said, and my head shot up. I
looked around. No one was in the room. “He is beautiful.” I turned
to find Mason standing over my shoulder.
“Mason,” I cried. “Why?” I felt the coldness of his caress on my
cheek.
“I couldn’t get past my regrets.” He looked away. “I’m good
now. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my chest. I didn’t mean
to wrap my car around a post. I was being stupid, yes, but I was so
angry that I didn’t think.”
“We miss you.”
“I know.” He knelt placing his hand on mine. “I’ll be around.
He has a real guardian angel now.”
“It would have been better to have you here for real.”
“I’m truly sorry, for everything, for every pain I ever caused,”
he replied.
“I know.” I sighed.
“Bye.” He waved, and then disappeared.
“There you are.” Nick came walking around the corner.
“Hey.” I looked up as he bent down to kiss me, rubbing the
back of his fingers over our son’s cheek. “You want to go?” He
asked.
“No, I’m okay. I think Jaxon needed some space,” I replied.
“Or mama did.” He kissed me again. “I’ll be back.”
“Yes, go. I’m fine. We’ll be in here.” When he disappeared, I
looked up to find Matt, my father and Mason all standing there,
watching us. Then one by one they disappeared, and I whispered
goodbye.

Watching them lower M
ason’s casket into the ground was hard.
Only his immediate family were there. They allowed all of us one
by one to shovel a pile of dirt into the hole. When everyone was
done they walked away but I couldn’t leave. I wasn’t ready to say
goodbye. Jaxon was sound asleep in my bosom and I held a red
rose in my free hand looking down into the hole.

“Let’s go babe.” Nick kissed me his back to the grave, tears
weighing heavy in his eyes. I nodded then tossed the rose in the
grave.

“Good bye, Mason.” I said l
ooking up as his ghost appeared. He
stood with his hands in his pockets. I nodded, he nodded and I
turned leaving him behind.

Sabrina Ross has a passion for writing and creating an alternate
universe in her work. She has been writing since she was a child
and always dreamed of becoming a published author. She is a selfpublished author of the
Immortal Island Series
as
SL Ross
currently available online.