Hate Me Today (Save Me #3) (5 page)

Vanessa

I sink to the floor, the water still pouring over me and fist my hands into my hair. What the hell is wrong with me? The tears roll down my cheeks but they’re washed away instantly and the sounds of my sobbing are covered mostly by the sound of the shower.

That isn’t how I pictured tonight going at all. All I wanted to do was go out and have some fun, get my mind away from everything that’s going on. Which I was doing a good job at until something crawled up Jason’s ass and he hauled me out of the bar like a caveman.

Maybe everyone is right and I can’t handle this shit.

I strip off my soaked clothing, wrap a towel around myself and search for something dry so I can get out of here. Once I drag on my clothes, I stumble out of my bus, hailing the first cab I can get.

Pulling up in front of the hotel the rest of the crew is in, I pay the driver and rush through the doors. The elevator isn’t going fast enough for me and when the doors finally spring open, I rush to find Mandi’s room.

I’m surprised my incessant banging on the door doesn’t draw more attention than Mandi when she finally flings the door open.

“What the hell happened to you? Why the hell are you all wet?” she asks, pulling me into the room and closing the door behind us.

Should I tell her? Probably not. As much as I want to, I know that I don’t want Jason running off at the mouth about what just happened so I should probably keep my mouth shut too.

I push the wet hair behind my ear and shake off the numb feeling I’ve had since Jason left me alone in the shower.

“Nothing happened, I’m wet because I took a shower.” I cock my eyebrow at her, trying to work around my nerves. “Is that allowed?”

She’s qui
et for a minute, just staring at me. “Mmmhmm. Sure it is. So since you’re going to lie to my face, let’s try this. Where did you run off to? I went looking for you when Tyrone said you weren’t on the bus but couldn’t find you so I came back here. I’m getting tired of the disappearing act.”

I fiddle with the hem of my shirt. “I went to have a drink.”

Her eyes widen, “Oh, just to have a drink. No big deal... except you went without telling anyone where you were and you didn’t take any security with you! In a city where you don’t know anybody but everyone knows you! Are you crazy?”

“I guess I didn’t think of it that way. Sorry.”

She turns and climbs back onto the bed. “Christ, what do I have to do, microchip you?”

I chuckle, falling into bed next to her. I cover my mouth as I yawn, suddenly tired. “That’s probably a good idea. Add in a shock collar for when I do something inappropriate.” I probably should have had one of those tonight.

“You know you have your own room right? I booked it, that’s how I know. But somehow you always end up here so I’m not sure why I bother.”

I don’t say what I really want to. I don’t tell her that I usually come to her because the only time I feel like I’m not in a bubble by myself is when I’m with her. I definitely don’t tell her that I ran to her tonight so I didn’t chase Jason down. That wouldn’t be good for any of us.

She must notice that something is off because she grabs my hand. “Hey, if I didn’t want you here, I wouldn’t answer my door every time.”

“Thanks,” I whisper as she flips the light off, drowning me in darkness. 

Jason

I've been avoiding Vanessa like the plague since I booked it off the bus last night. I know I'll have to deal with the repercussions sooner or later but personally, I’d rather it be later.

I figured
with the way I ran out of there she would be banging down my hotel door to scream at me, but she didn't. I didn't even hear her come back to her room that’s right across from mine, not that I was waiting for it or anything.

I let her get under my skin and it's driving me insane that I actually let shit get that far last night. I plan on making it very clear when I do see her that it will
never happen again.

I don't get a chance to talk to her though, because the first time I see her since I left the bus last night is on the wing of the stage right before we are supposed to go on. She pretty much ignores me, other than telling us that we need to check the set list because she added something.

The look in her eyes burns when she stares at me for more than a second. I can feel it like daggers in my skin and I know I have to do something to make it known that last night was a fluke.

I grab the first groupie that catches my eye, pinning her against the wall. Her leg hitches over my hip as I grind myself against her. She's hot
; easy, but hot. Then again, most of the chicks that come back here are like that.

Grabbing ahold of the backstage pass around her neck, I pull her closer to me, letting my lips graze over hers. Her eyes drop closed as her hands drift over my shoulders.

“Hey, lover boy! It’s stage time!” Devon snaps his sticks against my ass as he yells over the noise of the crowd.

I wink at the chick, making my way out onto the darkened stage. This is the best part of what I do. The rustle of the crowd settles my thoughts, pushing out everything that has happened, not just last night, but ever out of my mind.

Devon counts us in as the graphics light up behind us, sending the crowd into a frenzy. They begin screaming for Vanessa just as her voice blows through the speakers. We make it through six songs and a wardrobe change before the new song Vanessa tossed in last minute is supposed to be played.

“Have you guys ever done something that you wish you could go back in time and tell your stupid self not to do?” Vanessa says as looks back at me, smirking before turning back to the screaming crowd. “Well
, I’m glad I’m not the only one. We’re gonna do a song tonight that’s perfect for us screw ups and I better hear every single one of you singing along with me!”

She starts into
"Undo It" by Carrie Underwood, I try hard to fight back my smile because I know she’s doing this to try to get to me. She turns back to me toward the end of the song, stalking toward me as she sings. It reminds me of playing on stage with Abby the night she figured out who Jameson was. She did the exact same shit, fighting him with the words to the song.

Climbing the stairs to where I’m standing, she gets closer to me than she ever does when we’re on stage. Rocking her hips back and forth to the beat, singing directly to me for the last few words before spreading her arms with the last
two words, and falling backward off the edge of the platform with the last beat.

For half a second
, panic hits me because we never ran through this and I’m not sure if someone was supposed to catch her. I might not like her, but right now she’s my meal ticket. If she gets hurt, I don’t work. Devon and Jack start into the next song. I figure she must be fine and follow suit.

Once we finally finish up, I’m more than ready for another drink and possibly the chick I left in the wing before the show. I wipe the sweat off my face, sign a few autographs before some hot blonde named Mia introduces herself and her friend Kaitlyn, who just happens to be the woman from before the show.

The way Kaitlyn slides her arm around Mia’s back, resting on her hip, tells me that there is more than just a friendship there. I can work with that. We chat for a minute before I ask them if they want to come back to the bus with me. When they agree, I slide myself between them, wrapping my arms over their shoulders.

Once we’re through the doors of the bus
, I shove one of them against the counter, dragging her shirt over her head while the other one drops to her knees in front of me. Mia, I think it’s Mia anyway, slides back onto the counter, shimmying out of her jeans as she goes.

A wet, scalding mouth wraps around my throbbing dick as I swipe my tongue across Mia’s clit. Two of my fingers slide into her, working in time with my tongue and the bobbing of Kaitlyn’s head. Dropping my dick from her mouth, Kaitlyn tips her head back, licking my fingers as I slide in and out of her friend’s pussy.

Pushing away from both of them I drop down onto the couch, fisting my dick while the girls go at each other.

“As much as I like the show, if I don’t get my cock inside one of you soon, I’m going to have to find someone else.”

Kaitlyn’s the first to jump up, sliding down onto my cock after I get a condom on. Mia stands next to us like she’s unsure what to do so I grab her hand, pulling her so she’s standing above me. She rests a knee on the back of the couch, bending over me and I suck her clit back into my mouth, her friend diving right in along with me as she rides me.

Just as we’re getting into it, I hear the door open. It doesn’t matter though, I don’t stop what I’m doing. I’m loving the noises coming out of the girls and I’m pretty sure I know who’s climbing the stairs anyway which just make this even better.

“Its fine I’ll be there in a few minutes. I’m just gunna grab somethi-” Vanessa’s words are cut short when she spots us and being the asshole that I am, I turn my face so I can see her without stopping and wink at her.

Vanessa

What. The. Fuck.

Ten seconds, that’s all I needed. I just had to grab my phone and I’d be gone. What I didn’t need was to walk onto the bus, my home and see Jason with two groupie whores. One riding his cock like she’s trying out for the Olympic whoring team. Riding the same damn cock that was inside of me last night. The other girl is practically smothering him as she sits on his face, and that asshole, well, that fucking asshole actually has the nerve to wink at me like this isn’t anything new.

I think I’m going to puke.

I guess if I wanted to know where I stood with him, I figured it out real quick.

Rushing back toward my bunk, I grab my phone and a change of clothes, knowing I won’t be coming back on this damn bus tonight. Shaking my head in disgust, I try my best to ignore the moaning and skin slapping coming from the couch.

I flip Jason off as I step down the stairs, slamming the door behind me.

“Arg!” I yell, stomping away. I’m not sure why I’m letting him get to me, it’s not like there is anything going on between us.

“You al
l right?”

I spin, clutching my phone and clothes against my chest to where the deep voice came from. Even though it’s dark,
with the only light coming from the street lamp above us, I know who it is. The cowboy hat and baritone voice pull me back to when I was sixteen, breaking my heart all over again.

“Zach?” I ask, already knowing the answer.

He nods, pushing off the truck he’s leaning against. Instinctively, I wrap my arms around myself, remembering how much he hurt me before. Guess singing "Undo It" went out to two people tonight.

“Hey darlin’, how you been?” 

“I- uh, I’ve had better nights.” I run my free hand through my hair, turning my head to search for where the hell Mandi went so I might be able to go there too. “What are you doing here, Zach?”

“Honey, you’re in my town now. I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to see your pretty face again.”

He steps closer to me and for the first time with him, I don’t step into him. He messed me up so bad last time when he told me he “couldn’t handle” being with someone so sick and not knowing what the outcome was going to be.

I hold my hand up so he
will stop walking toward me and he does, but not until he’s close enough that I can feel his exhale against my skin.

“You left me. You couldn’t handle it. Now you think that just because I end up in the same town that you happen to be in, that it’s
OK for you to just pop in?” I can’t help the venom in my voice.

“Darlin’,” he starts but I walk away. His long strides have him caught up to me in no time. “Darlin’
, stop.”

I slap the hand he has reaching out to me and glare at him in the glow from the street light. “Don’t you darlin’ me, assface. Don’t use the southern charm or the Georgia boy good looks to get your way here.”

“OK,” he concedes, holding his hands up. “I just wanted to talk to you. Catch up. You know… like old times. No funny business, just you and me, the way it used to be. You remember how good it was back then.”

I make the mistake of looking into his eyes and just like they always used to, they make me do stupid things. Something about the way the blue pulls me in, makes me believe everything he says. I agree to give him one chance. Leading me to the door of his truck, he opens it and helps me in.

I text Mandi as we drive in silence to some tiny diner on the other side of town. Zach slides out and just like the southern gentleman he always has been, opens the door for me, allowing me in first. We place our orders and I have to break the silence before I go crazy.

“What did you want to talk about, Zach?”

He talks about some random stuff, filling the gaps of silence with random facts about what he’s been doing since I last saw him before dropping a bomb on me. “I was an idiot. Straight up stupid to walk away from you back then.” I force the tears back when he reaches across the table for my hand. I don’t pull back from his grasp because for the first time since I got sick and started touring, part of me feels safe again and I can’t help but think it has something to do with him.

“You left me when I needed you most. When my entire world came crashing down around me and the only thing that made me feel better was seeing you, you walked away.”

Without letting go of my hand Zach slides from his side of the booth and sits in next to me, his knee pressing against my thigh. Reaching up he cups my cheek, his thumb sliding back and forth as he rests his forehead against mine.

“You will never know how sorry I am for leaving back then.”

“What do you want from me,” I sniffle.

Leaning in, he presses his lips against mine and I fully cave in, kissing him back. Like always with him, he gets what he wants.

“I just want another chance at being happy with you. I wanna be there when you need me, even if it’s hard, which I know with what you do, it will be. But I wanna try. Just give me a chance to make it right.”

I think about it for a minute. Think about all the stuff that’s happened that he’s missed and all the stuff I’ve done lately to piss people off. I think about Jason and all the ways I’ve messed that up lately.

“One chance. Please don’t make me regret it.”