Having Nathan's Baby (12 page)

He was going to drag this out,
I realized, half-excited and half-impatient. I watched carefully as he lifted my leg and passed it in front of him so that he could slide my panties off the rest of the way. I felt a rush of cold air against the moisture between my legs. My sex quivered in anticipation, his erection just a breath away from me. I couldn’t stop myself from angling towards him suggestively.

“Not yet.” His eyes were dark on
me as he moved from the bed.

He knelt on the floor and pulled
my legs towards him. I closed my eyes and leaned back. I knew what was coming. My whole body tensed in anticipation. The first sensation was his breath against the folds of my sex. Then a gentle stroke from his sure fingers. He opened me to him, and I felt the first touch of his mouth. After that, I was lost. My head angled back, I gripped the cotton covers between my hands as I felt the first wave of intense arousal pick me up and carry me away. I lifted my legs instinctively, anchoring myself to the bed. His mouth was hot against me. Each suck and each thrust of his tongue stoked the fire. I felt myself being lifted higher and higher, further away from reality, upwards and upwards until I was spiraling and out of control.

Almost, but not completely. Not yet. And then it stopped.

I opened my eyes and blinked a few times. My body thrummed with arousal. Glancing down, I saw Nathan standing at the foot of the bed. Totally naked and aroused, he was watching me with intense scrutiny. He touched his erection, stroking himself very slowly, his eyes running down the length of my body. When his gaze settled between my legs, I knew the moment had finally come. My legs widened instinctively.

He climbed on to the bed. Still stroking himself, he kept a careful watch on
my reaction as he leaned down, ready to enter me. His free hand slid under my bottom and he lifted me as though I were made of nothing. I could scarcely breathe; when I did, small panting sounds emanated from my throat. I felt his hand between my legs. Then the unmistakable thrust of his penis against my folds. I was so wet that he slid inside easily at first. I watched his expression. His control collapsed for a moment, halfway inside of me. I was tighter here and my muscles clenched around him in response to the arousal I could see reflected on his face.

I
widened my legs further and relaxed my muscles. With one hard thrust, he was fully inside of me. I felt a stab of arousal so intense I thought I might be having an orgasm. My body buckled and he stilled; I held on to him until I felt the sensation slide into a more bearable thrum in the background of my consciousness. Then he was moving, slowly at first, easing in and out as though he were reveling in every inch of me. I gasped, unable to contain the building pressure gathering at the junction between my legs. It felt so right to have him inside of me, filling my like this. I didn’t want it to end.

I
drew him in further, dragging myself against him, urging him on until he was thrusting faster and faster. And then I wasn’t really aware of either of us anymore, just the sensations in my body. He felt solid and hot and heavy, inside of me, on top of me. We were travelling on the same wave of desire, heading for the same goal. I felt him tense just before he reached it. My body reacted in kind: my muscles clenched and then a shaft of sensation pinioned my entire body like a lightning bolt. He moved only once, heaving against me and then breaking against the shore of my orgasm with his own shuddering release.

I woke the next morning feeling stiff. I lay still for a moment, adjusting to wakefulness. Sunlight streamed in through bare windows. I heard the distant thrum of traffic, and other sounds of the city; snippets of voices, joggers’ feet pounding on asphalt and, in the distance, a lone bird. Everything was muted, but it was so quiet in the room that I could make out each individual audible detail. I shifted and then winced. My cheeks flushed as I recalled the lengthy and intense lovemaking I’d shared with Nathan the night before. My body was still throbbing from it.

My
hand passed across my swollen belly. My heart rate eased somewhat when I felt nothing untoward, though what I’d expected to find, I wasn’t sure. A second pregnancy? I could be forgiven, I decided, for wondering if that had been a motive last night. Nathan hadn’t been able to rest. I’d often heard the term ‘insatiable’ used to describe keen sexual desire, but last night I’d truly understood it for the first time. He’d been like a starving man granted a last meal. I’d hungered for him in the same way. I experienced mental flashes of his raw determination to thrust into me again and again. I recalled the heat, and the scent of him, the burning compulsion to draw him in. The sheer obliviousness of it had been close to insanity.

Had
we both sensed that this was perhaps some kind of closure on our relationship finally?

I
felt a pain in my chest and discarded the thought the way one might drop a burning coal. I’d think about that tomorrow. Or next week. We hadn’t been getting on recently, and there seemed no way to continue with the relationship as it had been, but it seemed morbid to focus on that when everything felt so right this morning. I was still warm from the embers of a night of deep intimacy; I wanted to revel in it a little longer.

I
moved my head, finally. He was still asleep. My chest contracted on seeing him there. He was facing away from me, his body in a semi-fetal position. The covers were low on his hips, and I was afforded a long, sensuous view of his lean upper body. Tattoos, some as dark as his hair and others faded with age, decorated the taut flesh. Even in repose his muscles seemed poised and ready for action. I turned on my side and ran a light touch from his shoulder and down his side. I rested my hand against his hip. He felt solid and warm against me, like an anchor.

He stirred but didn’t seem to wake.
My mind drifting, I continued my forage, moving the covers back to expose his buttocks. They were perfect; I trailed a finger across them in appreciation. Lazy humor stabbed my cheeks and forced a smile from me as he stirred again, this time uttering a low, definitely irritated moan. So, suddenly he didn’t want me touching him – was that it? The notion only emboldened me further. I inched closer to him until my body slid against his back like silk draping across a hard, immovable object.

He exhaled.
I could hear his breathing become more irregular; he was waking up. I felt a quickening in my lungs. Like this – while Nathan was sleepy and pliant and suggestible – I was in control, but I knew that was an illusion. Awake, he was stiff and hard and retractable, and probably just as hungry for me now as he had been last night. It was like awaking a beast. My heartbeat began to speed up.

Should
I lie still and let him sleep, or should I continue with my exploration? My sore body was telling my one thing, but another less definable emotion was urging me on.

There
was no real conscious decision to be made. I closed my eyes and breathed the scent of him. My wandering hand inched across his hip, past that smooth, unyielding and yet sensitive skin over his groin. His hair tickled the soft skin on my palm. I felt his penis flinch against my hand, the appendage waking independently from its owner. I smiled at this, teasing him with light fingers.

His legs shifted. He eased into a straighter position. His body turned towards
me, the movement as natural and instinctive as a plant moving towards the sun. I accommodated him by making a little space in the middle of the bed, but my focus was elsewhere. His eyes were still closed, his handsome features relaxed and his mind only semi-conscious. Now, I could see the full glory of his naked body in the unflinching light of the morning and my breath caught. The daylight cast shadows across his body’s valleys and ridges. He was very, very hard already. My body answered with a swift and callous throb right at the apex of my thighs.

Unable to resist,
I licked his neck and chest. I tasted the skin, slightly salty with sweat. My lips trailed a slow path down his flat stomach, enjoying every slight stir he made. All the while my hand drew careful and predatory circles around his groin and his thighs. The covers shifted and eased under his awakening. An artless groan rumbled in his chest. My mouth closed around his erection in a slow slide. As though he’d been punched in the stomach, he flinched, bent in the middle and gasped aloud. When I looked up, his eyes were wide open, so dark they seemed to be absorbing the light.

“I thought I was dreaming.” He fell back. “God,
I … what are you doing to me?”

I
smiled, easing my hands up his chest. I felt tiny rivets of sensation appearing all across his body. His erection jerked against my sensitive breasts; I eased down again and took him back in my mouth.

The breath left him as though he were plummeting down into a crevasse. He covered his brow with his hands, an
other groan grating against the still morning. I reveled in the feel of his hardness, and more keenly, in the power I had over him. He’d awoken with a false start but now he was rendered utterly incapable of resisting. I eased my mouth slowly up and down his shaft, teasing him and drawing out the pleasure. It wasn’t until he finally reached down and hauled me up against him that I realized he’d endured more than he could take.

He flipped
me over, his body rearing up on top. He was panting; like he’d stopped running, he rested for a moment and considered me with dark rapacity. He didn’t kiss me. He didn’t even try to move to touch me. The moment throbbed between us. I could feel an acute thread of sharp longing tearing through me like a sore nerve. He was – adjusting, I decided. Trying to regain control. Had I disoriented him?

Then his head lowered. Surprisingly, he didn’t kiss
me. He rested his head in the soft valley of my breasts for a moment, and breathed, slowly and almost gratefully. My heart beat with such a heavy thud that I thought I might actually have an attack of some sort. The blood seemed to pulse in my neck erratically. Emotion was coming off him in waves. It was enveloping me. When he lifted his head; his gaze was so tender on me that I felt the world dissolving away around me. My body seemed to melt away, too, until it was just Nathan. I existed solely in the thrall of the tension between us.

“I love you.”

At first I wasn’t sure who had said it. I wasn’t even sure anyone had actually uttered the words, or whether it had sprung out of the ether between us. It was as if emotion had forged our souls together and evoked the phrase from nothing. Then I felt a spurt of moisture behind my eyes and I realized what that meant.

“I love you, too.”

He kissed
me now. It was a gentle touch, no more than a breath, a promise. His head dipped and he wrapped me in his arms, cocooning me in his welcome weight. I slid my limbs around him. If I could have climbed inside of him at that very moment, I would have. I’d never felt closer to another human being, ever. I’d never known it was possible to experience this level of wholeness, a sense of being one. I felt his heart beat against my chest, and then wondered if it was actually my own. I felt so fused to him it could have been one and the same.

“We’re having a baby,” he said.

I buried my face in his strong neck. It was strange, but I felt like I’d been waiting for him to say those words ever since I’d told him about the pregnancy. Or rather, it wasn’t the words, but the emotion behind them. There was a sense of unity threading through them. We were having a baby. Not just me, but us. We were in it together.

He lifted his head. He was smiling now. His eyes searched
my face as though he were seeing me for the first time. There was a long pause. “I’m also really, really glad,” he said, his voice low, “that you came to your senses over the no-sex rule.”

Humor pulled the figurative rug out from under
my feet. “Who says I have?”

“Well, I’d say waking up to find my erection in your mouth is a bit of a giveaway.” He kissed
me slowly. “I thought I was going to have a heart attack.” He released a laugh on a slow breath. “But what a way to go… Now you know how to get rid of me if you ever want to.”

I
didn’t want to. I would never want to, I knew, as I continued to meet his warm, heady gaze. There was no question remaining in my mind that he would be in my life for as long as either of us existed. As he eased his body against me again, I wondered how to express that to him. He was still rock hard; his expression settled, his features tensing as he slotted his hips snugly inside mine. It seemed the brief confessional interlude was over, so I tossed the complicated emotion aside. I closed my eyes and focused on the much simpler escapist sensation of pure desire.

The sound of the doorbell was a
unwelcome surprise to both of us. He cursed; he flailed an arm across to the bedside table and grabbed his watch.

“What time is it?”
I asked.

“It’s after eleven.” Humor warmed his eyes again.

My jaw slackened. I hadn’t slept until after eleven since college. Probably not even then.

He tossed the watch away,
and uttered a not-very-generous comment towards the innocent bell-ringer. “If it’s urgent they’ll ring again,” he said. His mouth dipped and he caught mine in another light kiss.

I
warmed like kindling under a desert breeze. It took just the slightest shift in his hips for my desire to explode again. A guttural sound emanated from deep in my throat. I slid my legs up the length of his, burrowing him deep between my thighs. I felt his arousal kick up a gear. His body tensed. He moved against me, positioning his body to join with mine. I gasped against his neck and I felt the tip of his erection graze against my sensitive folds.