He: (Shey) (Modern Classics (Penguin)) (19 page)

‘“My hunger for painting is far greater than the hunger of my stomach,” said Sukumar.

‘Nitai said with some sternness, “You’ve never had to prove that yet—you’ve never had to earn your bread.”

‘His father’s words fell harshly on his ears, but all the same, Sukumar smiled and said, “You’re right—I should prove my words.”

‘The father thought his son would now settle down to the law at last. Sukumar’s maternal grandfather at Barishal
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is a rather eccentric old man, and Sukumar resembles him in both looks and character. The two were the best of friends. They discussed the matter between them. Sukumar received some money, and slipped away abroad before anyone knew it. He left a letter for his father: “You don’t want me to study painting. Very well, I shan’t. You want me to learn a trade, and that’s what I’ve set out to do. When my training is complete, I’ll come to you for your blessings. I hope to receive them.”

‘But he had told no one what trade he intended to learn. A diary was found in his desk. From its contents, his family realized that he’d gone to train as a pilot. I brought away a copy of the last pages of his diary. He had written:

‘“I remember embarking upon a journey from one end of our terrace to another, on my faithful winged horse Chhatrapati, to rescue Pupu-didi from the land of the moon. Now I’m setting off to tame a mechanical winged horse. In Europe, they’re preparing to send an expedition to the moon. If I get a chance, I’ll put my name down for it. For the moment, I’m content to hone my skills by flying round the earth. One day, Pupu-didi laughed at the picture I’d painted in imitation of her grandfather’s. From that day on, for ten whole years, I’ve practised painting. I’ve never shown anyone my pictures. I’m now leaving behind two I drew recently for her grandfather. One is about the unity of earth, water and sky; the other a portrait of my grandfather at Barishal. If Pupe’s Dadamashai can make her take back that day’s laugh by showing her the two pictures, well and good. If not, he should tear them up and throw them away. This time, it’s not impossible that my horse’s wings should break halfway on the road to the moon. If they do, I’ll reach the Land of Truth in the blink of an eyelid—my journey round the sun will end in my melting into the earth. If I survive and become adept at paddling my boat across the sky, I hope one day to take Pupu-didi with me on a journey into space. I seem to remember that in the Age of Truth, what you wanted was exactly what happened. I’ll try to train my mind to see desire as result. Since childhood, I’ve had the habit of gazing idly at the sky, filled as it is with the million wishes of the earth-bound. I wonder what use these fleeting wishes are in creating new worlds. Let the unspoken wishes that float upon my sighs drift in that sky, the sky I am myself about to fly in today.”’

Pupu-didi asked in distress, ‘What news of Sukumar-da now?’

I answered, ‘It’s because there isn’t any that his father’s going to England to look for him.’

Pupu-didi’s face fell. Quietly, she went to her room and closed the door.

I know Pupu-didi has hidden away those childish drawings of Sukumar’s in her desk.

I wiped my spectacles and went off to Sukumar’s house. The broken umbrella was no longer on the terrace, neither was the half-burnt stick.

¹¹⁵
Nandalal-babu
: Nandalal Bose, a famous artist, who at this time was the head of Kala Bhavan, the art department of Tagore’s university, Visva-Bharati.

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Barishal
: a district of Bengal now in Bangladesh.