Heart in the Field (15 page)

           
Yet he knew he might never have what
he wanted. And that would equal the pain level when he actually discovered that
his parents couldn’t care less about him. So why was he torturing himself?
Answer: because, whatever his sane mind told him, he couldn’t stop himself.

           
Serena lifted her hips and shifted
imperceptibly away from him. She was staring straight ahead, and he noticed a
few stray hairs she had missed pinning up whispering against her neck. He
wanted to place his lips there and sip the nectar of her. The way he had on the
picnic table bench. Remembering that interlude was anguish, because he knew how
she could respond. He had never felt this way about a woman before, and he
restlessly slid across the seat and lounged into a corner. He’d thought it
once, he must think it again: a moment of lust with this woman could sabotage
him and his career.

Chapter Nine

Serena was
relieved when the Lincoln
slid into her driveway. She had stayed up too late. Her last drink, the brandy,
tasted stale in her mouth. Her stomach didn’t feel particularly stable. And her
feelings toward Nick were entwined inside her like a ball of wool that had been
tangled by a kitten.

           
Also, there was everything else that
had happened this evening. Had she really almost seduced Nick in the kitchen
then later told him that he reminded her of her father? And had she actually
heard Pat tell her that the employees of Steel referred to her as the Ice
Maiden? Had she really promised Pat that she would give Nick a chase and thus
veer him away from Juliette? She now didn’t think this action would be
necessary, judging by Nick’s earlier non-enthusiasm for Juliette.

           
Gerry turned off the engine and
Reeva
said, “Now we’ve trapped Nick’s car into the
driveway. Serena, maybe it would be wiser if he stayed the night anyway. We’d
never forgive ourselves if anything happened to him.”

           
“That’s up to Nick.” Serena was sick
of all the ups and downs her emotions had been through since she had first
heard Nick Fraser’s name the other afternoon. The thought of him sleeping in
her other spare bedroom put the seal on the most desperation she would ever
feel. She felt like clawing her way through the roof of the car and running
away.

           
“Nick is pretty tired and he
wouldn’t mind staying,” Nick said.

           
She glanced at him through the haze
made by her outside light. For most of the evening his expression had been
pretty open, as if he’d pulled aside a curtain to expose a part of himself for
the party. Now he looked more enigmatic. She began to suspect that Barbara was
right, and there was more to Nick than a handsome face.
      

           
She actually felt a pang of sympathy
for him and conceded to her mother’s suggestion. “I have another spare room.
You’re welcome.”

           
“Thanks.” His smile was perfunctory.
“I did kind of belt back the beer at the beginning of the party.”

           
“Then stay. We wouldn’t want you to
get pulled over.
Especially when you’ve been out with a city
politician for the evening.”

           
“Also it would be bad publicity for
your new show,”
Reeva
added.

           
With that settled, everyone went
inside the house to congregate in the kitchen. Serena held Pascal in her arms,
feeling a letdown restless sensation throughout her entire body. She hadn’t
wanted to stay at the party, but she didn’t feel ready for bed either. She was
almost relieved when
Reeva
discovered the bottle of
wine that Nick had brought her this evening.

           
“It’s not very cold,”
Reeva
said. “But let’s add ice. Serena do you have any
glasses?”

           
Serena let Pascal go and retrieved
the glasses from the cupboard. Nick opened the bottle. Gerry found the ice
cubes in the freezer. Nick poured four glasses.

           
Reeva
perched on a kitchen chair, holding the glass. “Ah, this is nice. So cheers,
everyone.
To Serena and Nick’s new show.
We hope it
goes splendidly. Don’t we, Gerry?”

           
“We sure do.” Gerry smiled. “You
make such a great couple. Cheers and good luck.”

           
They polished off the bottle of
wine, dissected the party, and Barbara and Don’s home, and then
Reeva
and Gerald retired to their room.

           
Her head reeling from the late hour
and the wine, Serena watched herself rinse the glasses. They were expensive
crystal with a gold rim, and too good for the dishwasher, so she would wash them
properly in the morning. She stood them carefully in a row and the gold
shimmered before her eyes. She touched her forehead to stop the dizziness.

           
“All right?”
Nick asked.

           
When she turned from the sink he was
right in front of her. “I feel dizzy.”

           
He smiled. “You’re looped. That’s
why.”

           
She shook her head. “Am I? How about
you?

           
“I’m feeling fine. And I want to
feel yours.”

           
She laughed, and he placed his hands
on the edge of the counter until she was trapped by him. Her fingers caressed
his waist and his head dipped to claim her mouth. This is what she had wanted.
Serena closed her eyes as his kiss lulled her into a mist of desire. The only
sounds she could hear
was
their breathing. All she
wanted was him.

           
She ran her fingers down his thighs
to discover he felt as muscular as he looked. His tongue, hot and seeking, was
inside her mouth now. She battled him with her own tongue. The part of her that
wasn’t involved in his embrace wondered what she was doing.

           
His hand slid upward, between her
top and her skin, and she sank lower into him. He began to move his hips in a
thrusting movement, into her. She felt his fingers explore her nipples and she
was going to explode with feelings. She wanted to wrap her legs around him, but
he removed his mouth and his body, leaving her sagging against the counter.

           
“I want you sober the first time.”
Nick had a definite shake to his voice as he adjusted his belt and raked his
fingers through his hair. He rubbed the side of his jaw, as if feeling for the
stubble collecting there. “I want to be sober as well.”

           
“I didn’t think there was going to
be a first time.”

           
“There has to be if we continue like
this.”

           
She reached up to her hair and found
that it had loosened and was straggling down her neck. Her veins were beating beneath
her skin. She felt open and vulnerable. “Didn’t we talk about this earlier?”

           
“Talking isn’t helping what we feel
for one another.”

           
He sounded so desperate. She must
affect him the same way as he affected her. What was between them was like a
physical explosion. She shuddered. “I want you as well.”

           
He seemed
more
calm
now. “Thank you for admitting that.”

           
She ran her finger along the curved
edge of the counter. “I have a reputation at Steel? Have you heard?”

           
He shook his head.

           
“Apparently I’m an ice maiden.”

           
“I don’t believe that.”

           
“Well, it’s true.” Serena smoothed
the silk down her hips. She felt more composed now. “I’m not ready yet, Nick.”

           
“Me neither.
If
I’m honest.”

           
“Good
Because
it’s better if we don’t.
Working together.
Like I said before.”

           
“Yeah.”
He
glanced at the microwave clock. “It’s pretty late. We should get some sleep.”

           
“I have to lock up.”

           
“I’ll help you.”

           
Serena went to locate Pascal who,
with the living room out of bounds, and the kitchen too noisy and occupied by
strangers, had been sleeping on the cushions on the wicker sofa in the sunroom.
He managed a yawning stretch to greet her, and rolled up into a ball once more.
All the time Nick followed her, pattering behind her like a puppy she knew he
wasn’t. He was a tiger, dangerous and raw. She felt his presence in every one
of her bones and all through her veins. When he was around her she experienced
a sensation like being connected to him physically. She didn’t like it. She had
always been a loner, like her father.

           
That sudden realization hit her like
a vehicle ramming against a brick wall. If she was like her father then she was
like Nick. Was that why she was so attracted to him on one hand and skittish on
the other? Did she see herself in him? Did she see a person who actually
preferred to be alone because it was safer for the psyche, a person who had a
low threshold for pain? And yet she wanted passion.
At least
her body wanted passion.

           
Serena tapped open the door to her
other spare room and flipped the ceiling-light switch. “This is your room. You
can use the bathroom across the hall.”

           
As Nick passed by her into the room
she caught in a breath while he was close, and barely let it out again as he
looked around.

           
“It’s great.” He gave her a serious
look. “You must think you’re running a B&B tonight.”

           
“I do, rather. But it is safer that
you stay than drive home all that way. It’s only for a few hours anyway. It’s
pretty late.” That was the way she’d reconciled his reasons for staying at her
house.

           
“It’s early morning, to be exact.”
He sat down on the edge of the bed and tested it.
“Nice and
soft.
Great.”

           
“Good.” She was agitated with their
relationship. She felt like screaming and tearing out her hair.

           
He patted the top of the black and
pink duvet. Then he stood up again and began unbuttoning his shirt. “I’m going
to have a few hours sleep.”

           
Serena’s throat ached. She could
close the door, cross the room, press her fingers to his smooth, golden chest,
lift the shirt from his shoulders, unbuckle his belt, feel how hard he was and
take that hardness inside her own softness. She wanted him to plunge and plunge
inside her until she was taken completely out of herself and out of her mind.

           
He slipped out of the shirt and
touched his belt buckle. “Goodnight, Serena.”

           
Mutely she stepped back. “I’ll leave
towels on the rack in the bathroom for you.”

           
“Thanks.” He smiled his clean white
TV smile. The smile reminded her of who he was and what she was actually
contemplating, a relationship with no conclusion. But it was a smile that hid
his true feelings. And she was the same way.

           
“Then I’ll leave you.” She backed
out of the door and closed it.

           
By now Pascal had wandered into the
hallway. Serena scooped him up and carried him to the kitchen, where she poured
herself a glass of water. Carrying cat and water, she went to her own room.
While Pascal settled down for the night, Serena stood under a steaming shower,
disregarding the fact that it was gone three in the morning. She just knew that
she was wide awake and in a terrible situation. To put it simply, she had to
work with a man she wanted to sleep with.

           
When she eventually stopped thinking
about Nick she began to worry about the new show and wondered how she was ever
going to cope with the volume of work. With that anxiety attack under control,
it was five thirty, and Pascal was clawing her rug letting her know he was
impatient for his breakfast. She fed him and slumped back into bed and fell
asleep. The next time she woke up she could smell strong coffee, and she heard
voices in her house.

•

           
Nick liked
Reeva
.
The same way he liked Barbara. And although he received messages from
Reeva
that she might think things about him that were
different from her exterior platitudes, he still found her entertaining. Poor
Gerry barely got a word in edgeways, but he didn’t seem to mind. If his
expression was anything to go by, he adored
Reeva
,
and was just pleased to be her husband.

           
Luckily Nick had thought to put his
battery shaver, a change of briefs, shirt and a pair of jeans into his car before
he’d left yesterday. Not that he’d expected to stay at Serena’s house, but just
in case he might have stayed anywhere, be it at Don’s or at a highway motel.
That it was Serena’s had made the night just a trifle more restless. He’d spent
most of the time aroused and trying to dismiss that she could become a serious
problem.
Which is why he made an effort to keep cool now,
when she walked into the kitchen where he was sharing coffee with
Reeva
and Gerald.

           
Serena wore a robe of midnight-blue
silk to match her eyes. The material rippled in the sunlight streaming through
her kitchen window. Her hair, ruffled from sleep, was like strands of gold, and
her features, without make-up, totally alluring. She carried Pascal snuggled
against her breasts.