Heart Matters (19 page)

She developed a dull headache that she
presumed was the result of too much excitement and chose to down a
couple of aspirins and take a quick nap. It was late afternoon when
she woke up and began mechanically dressing up for the party.

The evening gown that she wore was a deep,
midnight blue velvet creation with a sparkling of sequence all
over. It was halter necked and left her back open to the small of
her waist. The soft velvet clung to her shapely figure and a deep
slit that ran to her thigh gave her a very seductive look. She
chose jewelry studded with diamonds that lent deep highlights to
her chocolate colored hair. She chose to wear her hair in a stylish
chignon and wore high-heeled shoes to give her a few extra inches.
When she looked in the mirror, she was aware she hardly looked like
a new bride, shy and full of giggles. Her make was light and done
up in subtle shades of copper and brown for a mature, sophisticated
look. She was sure that was the way Steven liked his women.

***

“No, stop! Don’t move!” Niki yelled on top
of her voice just outside the front door of Steven’s penthouse.
“Steve has to carry you over the threshold. Steve, Steven Hart!
Will you please get over here quickly?”

Steven arrived making his way through the
throng of guests who had already arrived. He looked so dashing and
charming in his tuxedo that Jessica once again felt a familiar tug
at her heart. He grinned at her and she blushed visibly. “Don’t
bother, you’ll get your jacket wrinkled,” she mumbled.

Steven’s arm went about her waist and before
she could react, he swept her off her feet and into his arms.
“Sorry, darling, it’s tradition,” he drawled before landing a sound
kiss on her lips. She laughed unwittingly and let him carry her
effortlessly over the threshold amidst loud cheering and applause
from their family and friends. Once inside, he made his way to the
lounge and set her down gently. He kissed her again, this time so
tenderly that a collective ‘aw’ rose from the guests.

He drew back, keeping his arm around her and
then began mingling with the guests accepting their best wishes.
Jessica somehow forgot her earlier skepticism and began enjoying
the reception party. It felt perfect for her to be next to Steven
as his newlywed bride.

She met Steven’s brother Sean for the first
time at the party. Although he had been Steven’s best man at the
wedding, she had not had the time to meet him personally. He had
been out of the country for a while and although Niki had spoken
about him often, Jessica had never met him. His resemblance to his
older brother was incredible. He had the same honey gold hair and
deep blue eyes, the only difference being the absence of the
harshness and cynicism that Steven often sported. He also did not
have that very appealing cleft in his chin that made Steven look so
devastating. Almost equal in height, Sean was on the slimmer side
with a lighter tan and an easy going manner. He looked so easily
approachable that after speaking with him for a few minutes,
Jessica felt she had known him a lifetime.

The party was in full swing by early evening
and with toasts flowing freely, Jessica drank much more than her
usual quota of champagne. She drifted in and out of conversations
with people, ate only sparingly and ignored the wild headache that
was beginning to turn vicious. She finally sank into Steven’s arms
for their first dance as a married couple.

Her eyes closed in an effort to shut out the
world and relished in the feel of his warm hands on her naked back.
When they had danced at Niki’s party she had been too tense to
actually enjoy herself but tonight was different. She was glad
Steven was a good dancer and let him guide her vaguely through the
other couples on the dance floor. She laid her head against the
firm wall of his chest listening to the reassuring thud of his
heart. When the dance ended, she was disappointed but put on a
bright smile and accepted Sean’s arm for the next dance.

She lost track of time dancing with one
partner after the other. Jeff claimed her for one of the dances and
she laughed gaily as he teased her about something or the other.
She drank champagne freely letting it go to her head and telling
herself that it was treating the headache by dulling her
senses.

It was well after two when the guests
finally left while the family left well after three in the morning
that too on Steven’s insistence. He was properly teased for it but
he didn’t mind it and gave sporting answers. When he finally closed
the door on them, he went in search of Jessica who seemed to have
disappeared long ago. He found her out on the terrace, stretched
out on a lounger. She seemed asleep, the moonlight throwing silvery
shadows on her vulnerable form.

Steven knelt beside her and traced a
delicate line down her cheek with his finger. The caress was
feather light but she sat up startled. She stared at him vacantly
for a moment before breaking into a sheepish smile. “I..I’ve had
too..much to drink. I..forgot who you were.”

He smiled back and she failed to see the
affection in his eyes. “You’ve had a long day. Come. I’ll take you
upstairs. You can take a hot shower. That’ll make you feel
better.”

“Y..yes,” she agreed haltingly and let him
support her to her legs that buckled as soon as she tried to stand
on her own.

“Whoa!” he exclaimed, his strong arms
sweeping her off the ground. “I think we will make better progress
this way.”

She giggled, her arms coming about his neck.
“My head’s..all..fuzzy. I..don’t know..if I’m awake.”

“I’d pinch you if my hands were free but I
guess this will do for now,” he chuckled, bending his head to give
her a quick kiss. He strode up the stairs that led to the upper
level of the penthouse with long steps and kicked open the second
door there. “Here we are.”

He went in and Jessica felt him lowering her
on the edge of a sprawling bed. With an effort she looked around to
inspect her whereabouts. They were apparently in the master bedroom
that was done up in shades of midnight blue and cream and supported
with contemporary furniture. Her head began reeling suddenly and
she sat up with a jerk. “Wh..ere’s the bathroom? I’m..going to be
sick!” She instantly felt herself being transported to a door in
one corner. Once inside she threw up disgustingly, all the while
aware of Steven’s hand soothing her back.

Later as she washed her face, she felt much
better. The fuzzy feeling had subsided leaving only a feeling of
sheer exhaustion coupled with a raging headache. “C..can I take a
shower now?,” she asked.

“Of course,” he said, directing her towards
a shower cubicle next to the bathtub. “Do you need help with
anything?”

“N..no,” she replied quickly then smiled
apologetically. “I’ll be fine. Thank you.”

He nodded moving to the door. “I’m shutting
this door but don’t lock it. I want to be around in case you fall
asleep in here.” She smiled and he went out closing the door behind
him. Right away, he heard a dull thud and his hand rested against
the door. “Jessica? Are you all right?”

“Y..yes. I’m fine, thanks,” she stammered
praying he wouldn’t come in and find her sprawled out on the
bathroom floor where her legs had given away. To her relief she
heard him move away. She stood up holding on to the washbasin and
after what seemed ages, managed to weasel out of her gown. She
removed her jewelry, slipped out of her undergarments next and then
entered the shower cubicle gasping with delight when the hot spray
of water hit her tired skin. She released her heavy hair and let
the water flow through it, relishing in the feel of it massaging
her scalp. Ten minutes later, she felt much better although she
noticed her eyes were red with sleep.

She found a massive terry towel robe on a
nearby rack and put it on since she had no intention of once again
wearing her elaborate gown. She thought she could ask Steven where
her clothes were stored and search for her nightdress.

When she came into the room, he was lying
back on the bed supporting the back of his head with his arms. He
had removed his jacket and left his shirt unbuttoned to the waist,
exposing his bronze muscular chest that was sprinkled with dark
blond hair that arrowed beneath his trousers.

Jessica drew in a shaky breath as he sat up
when he saw her approach. She had never seen him looking so
informal and now his bare chest and tousled hair caused her heart
to beat a nervous tempo. She was aware he was performing a close
scrutiny of her robe-clad figure and was glad its massive size hid
her completely to her knees.

As though comprehending her discomfort, he
rose to his feet smiling easily. “Well the shower seems to have
done you some good. I’ll take one myself.” He had to pass her to go
to the bathroom and when he was next to her, he winked at her
wickedly. “By the way, you look very sexy in my bathrobe.” She
blushed, hearing him chuckle all the way to the bathroom.

It was after he had gone that Jessica
realized she had forgotten to ask him the whereabouts of her
clothes. She looked around for the closet and when she found one
behind a door, she found they held only Steven’s clothes. Since
there weren’t any other doors to discover, she decided to lay off
the matter until morning and slid into the welcoming sheets of the
bed with the robe on. When her head touched the soft pillow, she
decided there was no place on earth like a comfortable bed. With a
sigh, her eyes closed and within seconds she fell into a deep
sleep.

Steven entered the room with a short towel
tied around his waist to find his bride fast asleep. He stood next
to her smiling to himself. Child-like with a hand curled near her
damp tresses he was suddenly aware she already meant something
special to him. He sat down next to her to place a kiss on her damp
forehead. She smiled in her sleep and he felt compelled to kiss her
lips.

Jessica sighed dreamily. She was having a
wonderful dream. She could feel sensuous lips caressing her face
and her hands crept up to lead them to her lips. They responded by
laying a kiss on her mouth before moving to her sensitive neck
where they laid tantalizing kisses. It made her gasp, sharp arrows
of desire running through her. Her hands reached out to touch bare
skin upon muscular shoulders, her nails digging in them as a tongue
licked out at her sensitive ear lobe.

The dream changed suddenly and she felt a
hand push aside her clothing and cup her breasts. She felt the hot
hands on her soft skin and a cold film of sweat broke out above her
upper lip. She felt the hands spreading against her stomach and
then going down. No! No!, she screamed in her dream seeing Jake
Wallace and then Adam. They were going to rape her! Ty, Ty, where
was he? Help me, Ty!

But Ty wasn’t there, it was Jake and Adam
taking turns with her! Jessica began struggling in panic. “Adam,
please!” she pleaded out aloud and the hands withdrew abruptly. Her
eyes opened in confusion and she saw the impenetrable blue depths
staring down at her. Her mouth fell open as she recognized Steven’s
furious face. “Steven? I..I..thought…”

“You thought I was your
lover
!” he
growled through his clenched teeth, his fingers biting into her
arms painfully as he shook her ruthlessly. “Will you be thinking of
him when I make love to you, Jessica, will you?”

Tears pricked her eyes. She felt thoroughly
ashamed of herself. Steven had tried to make love to her and she
had insulted him by calling out the name of a man who should have
no place in her life. But she had not done it intentionally. She
had not meant to hurt him. “I’m sorry, Steven, I’m so sorry. I
thought..I drank too much..it wasn’t intentional.” She knew she was
sounding pathetic but she had no idea how to go about explaining
her dilemma.

He released her with a disgusted look on his
face. “Of course it wasn’t
intentional
! But that doesn’t
make me feel any better! It shows you still think of him. You still
love him and I will not take what belongs to someone else!”

She sat up anguished, pulling the robe that
had fallen off her shoulders back over them. “I don’t
belong
to anyone, Steven. I..I..don’t know how to explain myself. Please
believe me when I say I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.”

“I’m not desperate, Jessica,” he said
tightly, going to his closet to rummage through it. He pulled out a
pair of clothes and headed for the door.

“Where are you going?” she asked near to
tears.

“I told you I won’t take you until you’re
ready, Jessica. Holler when you stop dreaming of him,” he gave back
sardonically before banging the door behind him.

Jessica kept staring at the door for a long
time not quite sure if she was awake or was having a nightmare.
Tears began rolling down her cheeks and she failed to understand
her own misery. Hadn’t she entered this marriage so that she
wouldn’t cry again? Then why was she crying over a man she didn’t
even love, a man she hardly knew? She lay down sobbing
uncontrollably. Somehow she no longer knew what was happening in
her life. She didn’t know why she had married Steven or why it hurt
to see him so angry with her. Why?
Why?

She hid her face in the pillows sobbing
bitterly. It was only in the early hours of the morning that she
drifted into a fitful sleep, the tears not quite drying on her
cheeks as dream after dream held her guilty of events she could not
comprehend.

Steven did not speak to Jessica the next day. After
having spent a sleepless night in the guestroom, he had risen early
and dressed for work while she was still fast asleep. He frowned at
her when he came into the room for his clothes. Her inert form
irritated him beyond reason. Why the hell was she sleeping so
peacefully while he felt like a complete jerk?