Heart of Steele (19 page)

“Three days.”

“Huh?” She coughed through her yawn. “Three
days? And you’re already talking about a future?”

“We’ve met a few times, talked some, and
worked together.” Even to him, it sounded like he was moving too
fast.

“I’d guess you’re asking for too much from
her, and that’s why she’s ready to bolt.”

“I don’t want to let her go.” It was selfish,
but he’d keep her here any way he could.

She patted his hand. “Okay, I’ll help as much
as I can.” She cleared her throat. “Be sure to open up to her. Be
honest about things.” Her voice sounded odd.

He studied her face. He could tell she was
hiding something. “Like what?”

“Like everything.” She stood and walked to
the fridge, opened it, then slammed it shut. She spun around and
glared at him. “Like Ryder, goddamn it. He’s your brother, my
brother, Dad’s youngest child, and he won’t come to see Dad because
he doesn’t want to make you angry.”

Steele scrubbed a hand down his face. “Aw,
hell. Ryder doesn’t belong here.” It was too public. People would
question his presence here and someone would start digging. “Once
Dad gets home, he can visit...”

“What if Dad doesn’t come home.” Val took the
chair across from him. “Doesn’t our brother deserve the opportunity
to talk to his father? To say goodbye...” She broke down
crying.

Steele jumped up, sat next to her, and pulled
her against his chest. “Dad’s going to be okay. I can feel it.”

“What if he’s not?” She sniffled.

He pulled three tissues out of the box on the
table next to him and handed them to her. “I don’t know what to
say.” He could see her point, but it went against everything he
felt in his gut. If this story broke...

“Shit.” That was his main concern? His
goddamn reputation in the music community? When did that take
priority over his family? “Does Dad want to see him?”

She nodded and blew into the tissues. “He
hasn’t returned my calls. I thought at first he might be on a plane
or just ignoring me since he told Dad he wasn’t part of the family
any longer.” Her voice rose to a squeak and another burst of tears
rolled out of her.

“Okay, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.” She looked at him, red-eyed
and wet-cheeked. “I didn’t want to tell him over the phone, so he
doesn’t know Dad is ill.”

Guilt and loyalty to his father and more
guilt pressed in on him until he knew what the right thing to do
was. “I’ll call him.”

She tipped her head. “You will? Oh Steele,
thank you.”

“Don’t thank me, yet. The jerk might have
blocked my number already.” He pulled out his phone.

Val dug in her purse. “Here’s mine, just in
case you can’t get through on yours.” She handed her phone to him
and headed for the door. “I’ll go check on Dad. You don’t want your
sister to hear you being nice.” She gave a watery smile. “Might
ruin your reputation.”

“My reputation could use a little polishing.”
Especially with Tracy.

Steele sat in the hospital waiting room, his
father’s intensive care room just yards away, but he couldn’t go
back in there until he made things right with Ryder. Well, maybe
not right, but a temporary truce.

His finger hesitated over the dial button
next to his half-brother’s face on his phone. It wasn’t a good
feeling knowing he could yell at his brother easier than he could
apologize to him. How had things gotten so bad?

He pressed dial. It rang three times.

“What!” Ryder practically yelled it.

“I was wrong to say the things I said to you
earlier.”

Silence.

Steele sucked in a breath. “I’m not ready for
you to go public with this whole ‘family’ thing, but I didn’t mean
for you to stop seeing Val and...Dad.” It was the first time he
acknowledged their shared paternity.

“Is this a joke, Steele? Because you didn’t
give a shit about my relationship with them a few hours ago.”

“No joke. It’s deadly serious.” He bit back
the emotion that clogged his throat. “Dad collapsed tonight. He’s
in intensive care and they’re running tests on his heart.”

“No.” It was a whisper.

“He wants to see you. Will you come?”

“It was my phone call, wasn’t it. He had a
heart attack because I called.”

“He wasn’t feeling right all day.” His father
had admitted it to him after Val had left the room. “It’s not your
fault. Fuck, it’s my fault for keeping this damn feud going.”

“It wasn’t a feud, it was a vendetta.” Ryder
sounded stronger. “I expected to be assassinated at any time.”

He let a single laugh escape him. “Why the
hell didn’t I think of that?”

“Yeah, would have saved us both a lot of
time.”

“Listen, I can send my jet for you if—“

“I’m in Paris. The one in Texas. I was
heading home to Natchitoches. I’ll check out of the hotel and be
there in a couple hours.”

Ryder’s ranch in Natchitoches, Louisiana was
just getting started in the bucking horse business. His brother
spent a lot of time there. A hell of a lot more time than Steele
spent on his ranch.

“It’d be just as fast to send my jet.”

“Nah, I don’t want to leave my truck here.”
He coughed. “And it would make me crazy sitting here doing
nothing.”

“Right.”

Silence.

Steele didn’t know how to end this. “Okay.
We’ll be here.”

“Yeah. Thanks. For calling.”

Too many words collided with each other in
his brain but none felt right. “Yep.” He hung up. They’d find time
to talk when he got here.

Val opened the door and leaned in. “Is he
coming?”

He nodded. “In a couple hours.”

She knelt on the chair next to him and hugged
him sideways. “Thank you.”

He rested in her arms. “I can’t promise it
won’t be uncomfortable when he gets here.”

She smooched him on the temple and he pulled
back. “Yuck.”

Val kissed him again then wrapped her hands
around his neck, squeezing lightly. “Behave yourself, for Christ’s
sake.”

“I’ll try.”

A nurse walked in. “If you’re finished with
your family reunion...” She smiled. “The doctor would like to see
you.”

****

Nearly two hours later, Steele sat on the
waiting room couch. He’d dimmed the lights. Tracy slept with her
head on his lap, her body stretched out on the couch, and a blanket
covering her. She’d been amazing all night...or morning. Sitting
with Val or him while the other was in with Dad, running for food,
gathering toothbrushes and toothpaste for each of them.

The talk they’d had with the doctor earlier
was good news, but concerning. Angus was in excellent health for a
fifty-five year old man, but they couldn’t determine what had
caused his collapse.

They were keeping him in ICU and running more
tests in the morning, so Steele told Val to go home. She resisted,
but with Tracy’s encouragement, she finally left. Her home was a
few blocks away, and she could be there quickly if needed.

Steele twisted a piece of Tracy’s hair around
his finger. Soft and strong. Just like her. He rolled his eyes. He
was getting punchy from lack of sleep.

How much did he want to tell Tracy about
Ryder? He couldn’t ask his family to keep it from her, but did he
want to reveal everything? His own inner demons? His rank
behavior?

Loud footsteps sounded in the hallway. It had
to be cowboy boots. The noise level increased until Ryder looked in
the door.

Steele slid out from under Tracy and replaced
his thigh with a pillow.

She fussed a little, then went back to her
slow breathing.

He stepped out into the hall and closed the
door.

Ryder looked like mold on shit. His too-long
dark hair was sticking out everywhere, and his green eyes looked
dry and worn out.

“You made it.” It had to be the stupidest
comment he’d spoken in a long time.

“Long drive.” He nodded toward the closed
door. “You and Tracy, huh?”

“Yep.” He didn’t ask how Ryder knew Tracy;
half the world had seen that damn video, but he wasn’t in the mood
to give details. “Val went home. She was exhausted. She’ll be back
at eight.”

Ryder gestured to the bright area at the end
of the hall. “He’s in there?”

“Yep.” Steele led the way and they stood
outside the glass walls of their father’s room. Strange, he hadn’t
let himself think of Ryder as his brother until now. “Damned odd
how a crisis like this can put things into perspective.” Right now,
that was as close as he’d get to making amends for his bad
behavior.

“Yeah.” Ryder shoved his hands in his
pockets.

“You can sit with him for a while, long as
you don’t wake him up.”

Ryder looked at Steele. “I’ll take a shift.
You take Tracy...are you staying at the ranch?”

“Yeah. Okay. I need to call a ranch hand to
pick us up, so it’ll be—”

“Take my truck.” Ryder dug in his pocket and
pulled out his keys.

Steele just blinked at him. He’d been in
Ryder’s big rig, before the whole brother-thing happened. It was
his baby. “You sure?”

“I’m sure.” He looked at Angus. “I’ll be here
a while.”

“I’ll get a ranch hand to bring it back here.
If that’s okay.”

“All right.” Ryder nodded toward their dad.
“He looks so different...like this.”

“Uh huh.” The larger-than-life man looked
small and frail with all the wires and tubes connected to him.
“Doesn’t seem right.”

Ryder slowly shook his head.

Steele felt the pull to ask him—part common
courtesy, part wanting to start making things right between them.
“So, there’s room at the ranch if you want to...”

His brother’s head jerked to look at him, as
if he’d been smacked. “Thanks, I really appreciate it, but Val said
I could stay with her.”

“Right. Okay, thanks.” He jingled the keys.
“Call if anything...”

“I will.” He slid open the door, stepped
inside, and slowly closed it. Ryder caught Steele’s eye and nodded
once before walking over to stand beside the bed. He reached out a
hand to their old man and Steele had to turn away.

Steele’s actions had caused Angus to
collapse. He could have killed his father by letting anger
determine his actions. He swallowed hard and walked away. Now
wasn’t the time to think through this whole mess. Not when he felt
dog-tired and had a woman who deserved better than to be sleeping
on a hospital couch.

He looked in the window of the waiting room
door.

Tracy was sitting up, yawning and looking
around.

He pushed open the door. “Ready to go?”

She smiled and nodded.

Steele’s world was grounded once again.

****

It took over half an hour to reach the
McLairn ranch in a really sexy, tall red truck. Tracy had to force
her eyes open a few times. The heated black leather seat cocooned
her and almost lured her back to sleep, but she didn’t want to miss
anything Steele said.

He talked about what the doctor had told
them, how odd it was that they hadn’t found anything wrong with his
father, and how his father asked him to look after the ranch while
he was in the hospital.

Steele said nothing about Ryder or the reason
his father had collapsed.

When they turned onto the driveway leading to
the house, Tracy caught her breath. In the moonlight, the two-story
massive home glowed white, the wraparound porch called to her in a
way that made her wish this could be her home.

He parked the truck in front of a big
separate garage and got out, coming around the truck to open her
door. He left the keys in the ignition and an alert had sounded
while his door was open. Funny, she’d never lived anywhere that you
could leave your keys in your car.

She popped open her door before he could
reach her, but she let him help her down from the seat. “How old is
the house? It’s beautiful.”

Steele wrapped an arm around her shoulders
and led her up the steps onto the porch.

“My grandfather built it in nineteen-fifteen.
It’s been remodeled a few times, but it was built solid.” He opened
the door for her.

The foyer opened into the living room, full
of cushy-looking furniture and a big-screen television. He took her
hand and led her into the kitchen. “Hungry?” He pointed to a plate
of homemade cookies on the counter, covered in plastic wrap.

“No, thank you.” The hospital food wasn’t too
bad, but it was heavy, and she should watch what she ate. Those
cookies looked delicious, though. Her mouth watered, and she knew
she was in trouble. “A glass of water would be nice, though.” She
switched her focus from the cookies to the cute kitchen.

The room was old country charming with plenty
of honey-colored wood cabinets, lace curtains, and knickknacks on
shelves.

He drew a glass for her from the faucet,
handed it to her, and gestured to the stairs. “Bedrooms are up
there.” They passed a big mudroom, and he grabbed the luggage and
bags he’d had delivered.

At the top of the stairway, the hallway
branched right and left. “Dad’s room is to the right. Ours are to
the left.”

To Tracy, it sounded like they wouldn’t be
sharing a room, which was fine with her, considering the situation.
Situations. His father lying in ICU, and her uncertainty about her
relationship status with Steele. She’d planned to say goodbye at
the first appropriate moment, but after hearing about why Steele
had such an intense problem with Ryder, she wasn’t sure any
more.

Maybe if she and Steele could talk it out, if
he could explain why he felt the explosive anger he did, she could
help him work through his emotions and learn to accept the things
he couldn’t change. Maybe the relationship between Steele and her
could work out, too. But he had to start trusting her. Had to let
her into his life.

He set his bag in the first bedroom on the
left. “My room. Just as I left it when I was seventeen.”