Heavy Hearts (2 page)

I
rise off the bathtub edge and take a look at myself in the mirror. My brown hair is in desperate need of a haircut, it hangs low, split ends dangling right above the small of my back. My face looks pale and tired. My green eyes look dull under my mascara lacking eyelashes and I realize that if I’m going to be spending my evening with a millionaire playboy then I should at least put a touch of makeup on. I never liked to wear too much cause I always felt like everything was heavy and fake, but on occasion I would slap on some blush and mascara. Especially when my eyes are looking so sunk in, must have been the nerves.

As I exit the bathroom back into the party I once again hear my name being called, but this time it is not my grandmother, it’s not even a female voice. No, it’s definitely a male voice… a male voice that I distinctly recognize because it’s not a voice that I would normally hear, not in America anyway. I slowly turn toward the voice knowing who it is going to be before I even see him. Once he is in full view a wave of memories comes crashing down in my head as I remember my summer in London, my time in
Southwark, and my affair with Simon Basford. 

Chapter 2

I landed in Heathrow
airport on June 4
th
, three days before my eighteenth birthday, and four days before I would meet Simon. London was exquisite, and I couldn’t have been more excited to spend the summer with my two best friends in such a magical place. Adam Prinz and Suzette Mitchell, the two best people I’ve known since freshmen year of high school, and the absolute cutest couple out there.

We have been the three tightest friends for four years by then, and I knew from the beginning that those two were destined for each other. I didn’t really know my own stance on the whole destined to be together thing, but if anyone in this world were soul mates it was Adam and Suzette.

They didn’t officially start dating until junior year when Adam got down on one knee and asked Suzette to accompany him to the prom. A little over the top for my taste, but then again I was just the jealous best friend. Although, jealousy wasn’t really the right word. I couldn’t even put into words how happy I was for these two, they gave me hope, but I still felt a hint of envy towards them and even to this day in the back of my mind I wonder why he chose her and what was wrong with me. My jealousy would never be voiced aloud however.

Back to London now; three
young rich kids in a foreign country away from any parental supervision. The ideal way to spend a summer after four long years of perfect grades and endless track meets.

Upon leaving the airport we hailed a cab to take us to our hotel. We st
ayed in the heart of London, and I’d go through all the details of the sights we saw, the places we visited, and the people we met… but I’m telling you the story of Simon; not my vacation.

****

It was the morning after my bi
rthday, and we were all so hung-over. We spent the night dancing and getting smashed at a club called White Heat in central London. I woke up with a splitting headache and that feeling in my stomach like I was going to lose everything inside.

“Can someone please shut the drapes? Why are they wide open anyway?” Suzette mumbled beside me from underneath her pure white pillow. I was relieved to at least see that we were back in our hotel suite at The Savoy, and not chained up in some hostel. I couldn’t recall everything that took place the night before, but I did remember Adam standing in front of the windows butt naked and shouting “You’re welcome London!” Then everything after that was blank and I must have fallen asleep. At least I knew the mystery behind the reason why the sun was blinding us.

“Your boyfriend was showing the city his junk in front of the open window, don’t you remember?” I explained to Suzette. She peeked out from under her pillow, her eyes all squinty, and I could see the look of remembrance on her face as she burst out in a fit of wild giggles. Her laughter was contagious and soon we were both consumed as we recalled some of the events from our wild evening out.

“Where is he anyways?” She sat up shielding her face from the light with her long pale fingers.

Suzette isn’t beautiful, but she is pretty. She was born and raised in Austin, Texas, until her snob of a mother divorced her father and moved her to New York, so she has that country girl demeanor; sweet as cherry pie, but tough as nails if she needed to be. Her short dark brown hair framed her narrow face and her hooked nose. The rest of her was very tall, thin, and lanky; her arms and legs so long that she always looked as though she was made of rubber. I was always teasing her, calling her stretch and tugging on her as if she was one of those Stretch Armstrong dolls.

Right on cue Adam walked through the door, holding a tray with three cups of coffee. “
You looking for me?” He smiled as he walked to the shades and pulled them closed, saving us from the torturous afternoon sun. He walked over to the king sized bed that Suzette and I had sat up in with the overstuffed down comforter draped over our laps.

Adam was already so bright and cheery. After the night we had one would think we would be recovering for days, him especially. I had never seen someone th
row back so many pints of lager. I remembered him getting into a macho match, with an older English man, to see who could drink the most; I couldn’t remember who won. But there he was right in front of us, freshly showered and looking as cute as ever.

Adam was the typical boy next door; s
andy blonde shaggy hair, piercing green eyes, tall enough to tower over Suzette, and built enough to put all the other boys in the locker room to shame.

He handed us each a cup of hot coffee and kissed Suzette on the forehead. “Well, don’t you girls look comfy?
Suze, you know we had our own room on the other side of the suite right?”

“Oh, yeah… I don’t really remember even choosing. Certain events from last night are trapped in this haze” she explained. “Why are you so
chipper? Shouldn’t you be hugging a toilet right now, you drank the two of us under the table.”

“Control my
dear… and greasy breakfast foods,” he uncovered a couple room service trays to reveal plates piled high with French toast, poached eggs, and plump sausages. Plus some colorful fruit that made my mouth water.

After gobbling down my meal I was feeling better and a shower was needed to wash away any excess grime and hangover. The water felt so nice on my skin that I never wanted to get out.

The bathroom door was slightly cracked open and I could hear Suzette’s cackling, most likely Adam was tickling her, which was the only time she would ever laugh so hard that she began to snort wildly. I thought of the two of them and the love that they shared and I stood there under the scalding water thinking how alone I had been lately. I knew that I was only freshly eighteen years old and I had plenty of time for love, but since Finn I hadn’t even been on a date… that was almost a year ago now.

He was the very first love of my life, but I needed to move on; after all… he did. What I needed was to get out there, find someone, and fall in love a million times over. I thought to myself: I’m young and in London, and I shouldn’t be sulking in the shower, I should be out there right now making memories that I would never ever forget.

I emerged from the bathroom, smelling like mint and ginseng, wrapped in a plush blue cotton towel and the happy couple turned to me and let out a few cat calls. I walked into the closet and tossed the towel on the bed as I hid behind the door smiling at them as their calls got louder. As down as I could get when I was with them, and that green-eyed monster started to show, they always knew how to get me to smile again, and it cheered me right up.

The three of us were back in the bed again, only this time we were all lying under the covers. We decided to stay in the room the rest of the day and get back all our energy to have an adventure tomorrow. We talked all evening about our futures, what schools we wanted to attend, what careers we wanted; just life in general. It was nice.

The two of them would be off to Yale University in Connecticut after that summer. They had both received full academic scholarships; although all our parents have enough money to be able to send us anywhere, but it was that sense of pride you got from winning a scholarship that was the reason we all fought so hard for it. I received a full academic scholarship to New York University, my dream school. Suzette would study to be a writer, like me, and Adam strived to be the next best defense lawyer just like his father and grandfather. Parting was hard, but we remained close friends.              

That was the real reason we were on that trip. Because we knew after the summer was over, and we all had to return to our lives of academia, that we wouldn’t have much time for friendships. So I had to fill them in on my plan to find a beautiful English boy that I could fall in love with for the summer so I could get a little taste of what they had, even if I knew it wouldn’t last.

“Are you sure you want to do that? I mean what if you seriously fall in love and have to choose between NYU and a guy?” It wasn’t hard to tell that Adam was worried. He always had that overprotective big brother thing over me… sometimes it could get annoying.

“Well, if I completely
fell head over heels, and I was one-hundred percent certain that he was my one and only, then yes. I would figure it out. But I’m just looking to have a summer fling.” I tried to explain myself, but I could see the disapproval in both their eyes.

Adam began another sentence, but Suzette chimed in before he could speak, “
cause that worked out so well with Finn.” She was right, my summer with Finn was magic, but it came to an end and she was the one that was there to put me back together when my entire world shattered into a thousand pieces.

“Yeah, I know, but
Suze this time will be different. I’m going into it knowing it can’t last. I’m not going to let myself get as attached. Finn left under horrible circumstances and I didn’t know how to handle it. You really can’t compare the two situations.” I pleaded with them to just go with it, and I finally got them to agree. I knew the risks, I knew the chances, but I also knew what I was doing… or at least I thought I did.

“That settles it; tomorrow we hit the streets of London to find Miss Lucy Whitten a strapping young bloke!” Adam said in what could be the worst British accent I have ever heard, but I was enjoying his enthusiasm.

The next morning I woke up alone. Suzette made it to her own bed with her own beau last night leaving me feeling a little empty. But that morning I was confident and excited. Adam’s words spun around in my head and I was glad to have been able to get them on my side.

I climbed out of bed and slipped into the soft pink slippers at my bedside. Before exiting my room I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and turned back. I somehow
seemed different. I didn’t know if it was the London air, or my newfound look on life, but I appeared healthier.

My brown locks were bouncy and created the perfect waves that fell right in between my shoulder blades. My skin was incandescent, but in a good way, like glowing porcelain. I had never been the tallest thing, only about five foot six; mostly legs. Pretty average, but I was not complaining. Running track in school always kept my body thin, but a fit kind of thin
with definition.

I examined my face which at the time seemed flawless. I had always been lucky enough that I never had very much acne, so I rarely wore any kind of foundations or powdered
makeup. I pulled a tube of mascara out of my purse sitting on the vanity across the room and glided the brush over my lashes, making my eyes shine the brightest green they had ever been. I rubbed some light red lip stain over my pudgy bottom lip and smacked it against my thinner top lip. My intrepidity was really showing through, and I loved it.

After dressing in a cute little black sundress that stopped right above my knees, I slipped on some black and silver gladiator sandals and headed out of my room over to
Adam’s and Suze’s. I froze in my tracks though when I could hear the faint noises of passion bleeding through their door and I decided to just start my day without them. The three of us had been together since landing; I thought it would be nice for them to have some time alone. So I grabbed my laptop and decided to go find a small café to sip some tea and polish up a short story I had begun working on pre-London.

Being alone in a foreign city I decided it was best to hail a cab. When I asked
the driver to be taken to a quaint café he knew just where to bring me. Soon I was dropped off in front of an adorable little place called Café Chutney in Covent Garden. There was plenty of open seating outside, but I wanted the coziness of the indoors. I ordered my tea and found a seat on an ornate black stool with a soft red velvet topped cushion.The place was pretty crowded, but I was able to find a nice spot in the corner all to myself. I booted up my laptop and began to edit.

Everything about that place was overwhelming. From the smell of cinnamon in the air to the stunning Indian paintings hanging on
the walls I felt so relaxed, soon I found myself sipping on my third cup of Earl Grey Tea, and almost an hour had passed. As the waiter poured my tea I saved my work and pulled out my camera's memory card to upload some of the pictures we had taken so far.