Here With Me (Paloma's Edge) (17 page)

“Cindy,” Beth said breathlessly with her phone in her hand. I swooped right in and took the container of what had to be food from her and I walked to put it on top of the counter. Pierce stormed through the small kitchen and braced his hand on the door as Beth talked to her mom.

With a hopeful expression on her face, Bri went to the fridge and took out her tray of flans for everyone. “I knew she’d want to spend Thanksgiving with Beth,” she whispered to herself.

The turkey was cooling down and Gavin slid the sweet potato casserole into the oven. “What did you do, Bri?” Gavin sounded exasperated.

Bri put the tray on t
he counter, next to the container Cindy had brought with her. “I saw her at Agata’s Coffee Shop yesterday. I told her that she could spend Thanksgiving here with her daughter.”

“Without consulting with me first?” Gavin lifted one bushy eyebrow.

“It was a spur of the moment thing,” she said as she inhaled. “This turkey smells delicious. Doesn’t it, Hunter?”

I gave her a nod of my head when we saw Beth and Pierce welcome Cindy inside. But Pierce had done so apprehensively.

***

BETH AND CINDY WEREN’T
talking much, but they were sitting next to each other without any trace of animosity. Perhaps, Bri had made the right move by inviting Cindy over here. I knew that everyone else had written Cindy off, including Beth herself. Cindy’s presence made up for Chase having to go to an away game with his team.

Gavin finally took a seat at the table, after he’d insisted on serving everyone their second and third portions. Not even Cindy, his senior, had been able to persuade him to eat his food when it was hot, like we all were. I saw Beth snap her head up and look at each of us until we were meeting her gaze. “Jake and Mariska just text me to tell you guys Happy Thanksgiving and that they’ll escape from their families during the Christmas break.”

We all told her to tell them that we said Happy Thanksgiving too.

“If they’re in as great company as all of you, then them two have got a tough competition to contend with,” Cindy commented, surprising everyone at the table. The side conversations stopped.

“We hope you’re having a good time,” Bri said. “And that you’ve got room for flan.”

With a smirk, Cindy shook her head. “I am stuffed. And I am not like all you young folk. Every bite I eat sticks to me now. I’d have to work up a serious sweat on the treadmill to melt the pounds away.”

Beth bristled. “You don’t need to deprive yourself, Cindy.”

Nodding in agreement against the crook of Pierce’s neck, Bri offered, “I’ll give you a thin slice. You didn’t get to eat the potato salad you’d brought.”

Pierce and I shared guilty looks. It was the one thing Bri and Gavin hadn’t made.

Cindy waved her hand. “My friends in the dining staff at the Paloma showed me how to do it. I didn’t know how quick and easy it is to fix up,” she re
sponded.

“It is,” Gavin concurred. “That’s why Bri and I eat it all the time.”

The ringer on my phone was on loud and it disrupted the flow of conversation. Seeing that the number was blocked, I immediately knew it was my mother’s number. I excused myself from the table. When I was in front of the house, I plopped down on the concrete steps, and answered her call.

“Happy Thanksgiving,” I greeted her.

I heard a masculine voice clearing his throat and it put me on edge. “I wish I could say the same to you, Hunter.” An older voice as deep as my own said. And for seconds I was transported back to the time that I was five years old and had been caught drawing a little girl who was watching her mother garden in front of their house. Dad had given up the goal for both Chase and I to be star football players in the future. He’d then decided that I’d have success as a lawyer, since I most certainly didn’t have the natural talent for sports that Chase had.

“Did you hear what I said?”

“Why are you calling me from my mother’s phone?”

He let out an audible breath and I was anticipating that he’d argued with mother about her talking to Chase and I again, when I knew he was the one who’d forbade her to talk to us years back. “Because she won’t be calling you anymore.” I thought he’d hung up, but then, after minutes of heavy silence, he continued. “She’s gone.”

“What do you mean? How? Is she sick?” I voiced the questions one after the other with one pause in between.

“She looked fine this morning, but when I went up to our room to see if she wanted to go out …” His voiced trailed off. “Doctors say that she’d had a stroke. It just….happened. She had a clear bill of health for her physical this year. I called Chase first, but he didn’t answer. Her wake will be Saturday and Sunday. Then we’re having her funeral on Tuesday.”

“You didn’t miss a beat planning everything,” I bit out, feeling scared and angry. All this time I thought I was doing her favor by staying out of her life. Since she’d called me this summer, I’d secretly waited for a call from her, even a missed one. Or to hear from Chase that she’d asked about me. Now, I didn’t even have that.

“She’d arranged everything with the funeral home early this year. Your mother had her affairs in order,” Dad shouted into the phone, his words echoing into my ear. “So don’t you tell me that again!”

The sound of Gavin’s door opening brought me back to reality. I was in front of his house, so I had to keep the volume down. Beth walked with Cindy to her car and when Beth gazed at Cindy’s car driving farther and farther from here, she and floated over to me as soon saw she saw me. She joined me on the steps and, somehow, she understood that I had to tell her something. I didn’t want to break the news to Chase. Yeah, I was a chicken shit. I thought he’d handle it better if Beth told him. Telling him myself made my mother’s death true. I didn’t want it to be.

“I’ll book flights for you and Chase.”

“You don’t need to do that, Dad,” I said, heaving in a breath. “We’ll do that ourselves.”

“Okay. Then you guys will stay here. At the house.”

“I’ll get back to you on that.”

Chapter 22

Mariska

“ARE MOM AND DAD mad at us?” Pete asked me as I wiped down the table after our long and tense Thanksgiving dinner. I’d figured that he’d blame Mom’s scowl on her tiredness, but he was more perceptive or becoming more aware of social vibes than I’d given him credit for. Dad wasn’t a usual conversation starter, however, when he’d barely eaten the delicious turkey, stuffing, and the other side dishes that Mom and I had labored over—without having spoken a word to each other, thanks to years of carrying out the same exact process every year—it’d been impossible for Pete not to have caught on. Mom and dad had acted like I’d chosen to be with Hunter over them.

“They’re mad at me,” I corrected him. “And I am trying to make up with them, but sometimes resolving problems takes more than one night.”

“But what did you do?” He sounded puzzled as he reached out his hand to my wrist and I realized that I’d been cleaning the glass table until there were streaks on them. Stopping, I veered my eyes to him, unable to leave him hanging.

“I was dishonest and I did something they didn’t like,” I answered as simply as possible. I didn’t want him to worry about it any more, yet, I also knew that he’d ruminate over what could have caused a rift between Mom, Dad, and me. Before he could ask any more questions, I re-directed our conversation. “So, do you know what books you’re going to read to me tonight?”

“I read three stories to you last night,” he protested. “Besides, Mom said I could talk to Reid tonight, since I haven’t gone over my minutes.”

I nodded. “Go wash up now, or else your call will be cut short if you don’t do it before bed time.”

A distracted expression crossed his face. I laid the washcloth down with the others on the hanger, and heard Pete’s retreating footsteps.

I answered Beth’s incoming call, knowing that she was thankful for having Chase in her life, but wishing that he could be with her now.
 

“Oh, thank God you picked up the phone.” Her voice came out anxious.

“You sound like you’ve been crying—”

“Hunter needs you,” she cut me off. “His Dad just delivered some bad news; sometime this morning his mom died, Mariska. He’s not talking or doing much really. Chase, him, and I are going on the 11 am flight. This is the only direct one from Miami to Burlington. The next flight is on Saturday, and that’s the day of the wake. I am checking out the seats available for tonight’s flight. I can reserve you a seat.”

“Do it. I’ll pay you back.”

Beth blew a breath of relief. “Okay. And I’ll forward you the flight itinerary.”

“I’ll throw some stuff in my duffel bag and drive as safe and fast as I can to the airport,” I said, as I jogged up the stairs to my room in record time.

“Don’t forget your passport, and to talk to your parents about it now.”

“Oh, there’s that too,” I grumbled, feeling pressed for time as I threw clothes and toiletries into my duffel bag. Chase came to my mind. “How’s Chase handling it?”

“He’s in denial. Hunter is too. Chase is in a taxi. If we’re all on the road within twenty minutes, we’ll be at MIA at around the same time
. Call me if you can’t make it.”

“You won’t get that call, Beth. What do I say to Chase and Hunter? I-I can’t imagine—”

Beth interrupted, “I know that their heads will explode if another person offers them his or her condolences.”

“Thanks for giving me the heads up. And for taking care of Hunter.”

“I know it’s not easy to defy your parents, so thank you for doing this. Bri and I didn’t talk about Hunter with you yesterday, because we knew not being with him for days has been hard on you. And him.”

Beth hung up the phone and I was about to get up and go to my parent’s room, but when my gaze landed on the door, my parents were standing in the doorway, looking at me blankly. However, I knew Dad was irate by how white his knuckles were from his vise grip on the knob. I didn’t know if they’d listened in on the entire phone conversation I’d had with Beth or not.

“Pick up your stuff when you get back,” he said.

“But this isn’t what you—”

“Are you going to Burlington?” Mom cut me off.

“Yes, but it’s because their Mom died. He shouldn’t go through this by himself.”

“Have we misunderstood something?” He said factitiously. “He has his brother, and Beth. And maybe there’s a Dad in the picture or some other relatives they can lean on, but you’re squandering money and will be behind in school. For what? So he won’t fall off the wagon, because his mom died?”

“Think the worst of Hunter all you want,” I spat out and hoisted my duffel bag strap across my chest as I stood up. “He’ll be strong and he’ll be weak. I can’t predict the future. But I believe in him.”

They made room for me to pass through the door. Checking the time on my phone when my feet were on the last steps, I made a dash for the door. I was running late.

Hunter

I’D COLLECTED DOCUMENTS WITH my personal identification and grabbed the most formal items of clothing I had in my room. Beth had gone above and beyond to ensure that Chase and I were here for the 11 am flight to Burlington, Vermont. She’d called Annette and arranged for her to feed and walk Riley until Wednesday night. And Manny had told me to take as much time as I needed.

Chase had arrived in the waiting area ten minutes ago. His face was puffy and it looked like his eyes wanted to close but he willed them not to. He released Beth and sauntered over to me. We were standing in the middle of our aisle by the seats.

He wiped the tears from his face and then peered up at me. “I thought we’d always had time to see her one day again.” He sighed softly. “She’s really dead, Hunter.” He dropped his head and I gave him a hug, even though he initially withdrew.

Who could blame him? I didn’t give him a hug—ever. Not when Nana had died. Not when I’d passed out at a party from snorting too much coke and almost died from an overdose and had been there to take me to the hospital. We hadn’t been there for each other most of our lives, because we hadn’t known how to when we’d lived our own lives since we were young. I slapped him on the back, again and again, until I felt his breathing begin to even out. Beth was smiling sadly at us, but it wasn’t out of pity. And when I looked down straight ahead, Mariska’s long dark hair flowed in the air. I’d wanted to talk to her after I’d found out. Beth was supportive and very understanding that I needed my space. During the limited time of reflection I’d had, I’d thought about Mariska too. Beth had somehow convinced Mariska to come here, even though her parents probably forbade her to.

Chase raised his head and moved away from me. Giving me a quick nod, he then slid his hand in Beth’s proffered one as Mariska dropped her duffel bag. Hesitantly, she trotted toward me. My feet picked up speed and I found myself closing in on the physical distance between us. I didn’t give her time to express her sympathies. I brought her in my arms and she dove her fingers through my hair. She put her feet on top of mine, so she was closer in height to me. Surprisingly, a smile curved the corner of my lips as I devoured her mouth with my own, tangling our tongues to the point that I couldn’t see straight. My reward was her breathy moan and her other hand clutching onto my ass in a possessive grip for anyone to see. I’d gone without Mariska for days, but I hadn’t lost her. She was mine. In the way I held her gaze. In the command I had over her body. Even if she made a choice not to have me again.

***

I DIDN’T FEEL A sense of home as the cab stopped in front of the townhouse, and I knew that Chase didn’t either. We came here, because we wanted to be in the last place our mother had been at before she left this earth. Chase and I had sat far from Beth and Mariska during our six-hour flight. We’d been lucky to have gotten seats on the plane to begin with, but now as I looked at the place with some fond memories of Nana and Mother, going inside somewhat made her death real. Mariska lightly bumped my shoulder and I started for the house, since it didn’t look like Chase was going to do it. Shit, I didn’t even want to do it. I wanted to rewind time, make my way back into my mother’s life.

All of the windows were open as we walked inside the spacious house that felt double the size that it was. Dad’s coffee was on the table, but, otherwise, everything else was orderly. A note was stuck on the refrigerator door, addressed to Chase and I, and our guests. Dad had called me after I’d told Beth about our Mom’s passing, because there’d only been seven seats left and he’d urged me to reserve the seats. Beth had taken the phone from me and had taken charge from then on.

Beth and Mariska knew that Chase and I didn’t want to talk. Chase went to his own room with Beth. Unpacking and getting refreshed was unimportant to me at this moment. I knew that Chase liked to follow his rituals, no matter where he was. Despite being estranged with him for over five years, I knew what his habits.

I left my book bag against the wall in the hallway and I laced my fingers with Mariska’s. Mounting the steps until we reached the second floor, she accompanied me into my mother’s room. The door was wide open. My eyes zeroed in on the unmade sheets on her bed, something that wouldn’t have happened if she were alive. She’d been particular about that. I whirled around when I couldn’t stay in her room for one more second and Chase stepped inside with Beth. I owed him his own time to be in our mother’s room like I’d been.

After we’d left Chase alone with Beth in our parent’s room, we showered and dressed in my childhood bedroom.

“You’re smiling,” Mariska commented softly, breaking the silence we’d maintained since we’d gotten here.

I gave her a nod. “Those tie-dye pajamas you’ve got on are uglier than the ones you have in your dorm.”

She rolled her eyes. “The colors are just louder than my other tie-dye stuff.” She was under the covers of my bed, and patted the opposite side. Under normal circumstances, this situation would’ve gone in a different direction, and even though I knew that I wasn’t going to get any sleep, I sank down on the bed and winded hands around her waist. As she passed her fingers through my hair, we looked at each other
, until her eyes fell closed.

***

WHEN I MARCHED INTO the kitchen to brew some fresh coffee, Chase was already sitting at the table. I nodded my head at him and he tried to give me a slight smile but he was crushed, just like I was. I didn’t know how long he’d been here, and I didn’t ask. He had the same clothes on from last night and I doubted that he even washed his face or showered like I’d thought he had earlier this morning.

At the counter, I took three mugs, since Beth didn’t drink coffee, and I started the coffee machine. Dad had gotten one similar to what I had in my house. Then, I opened the refrigerator and eyed all of the vegetables and lean meats mother had already cooked. In the center, there was a huge uncooked turkey. I tried to ignore it, but it was right smack in my face. Mother loved to make a big feast on Thanksgiving Day, despite the fact that we hadn’t had any family or other guests over after Nana had passed away. I thought cooking helped her escape, but she hadn’t had it in her anymore to be hospitable to guests. I didn’t want to dwell on the general state of melancholy Mother seemed to have always been in. I took the slices of bread and the mozzarella cheese out of the fridge. I started making what I’d learned was Chase’s preferred version of grilled cheese sandwiches at the end of this summer.

“Beth’s asleep?” I asked him about a half an hour later. Chase had told me that Beth was an early riser. I figured it was enough time for him to wake up from the four cups of coffee he’d had. The plate in front of him with four grilled cheese sandwiches were untouched.

“Nah,” he grunted and swallowed more of his coffee. “She’s emailing her professors with an explanation about why she’s going to miss her classes.”

Turning off the stove, I slid the last grilled cheese sandwiches onto Beth and Mariska’s plates and left them by the stove. “We should do the same. I’ll tell Mariska to do that too.”

Chase shrugged his shoulders indifferently, when Dad appeared at the entrance of the kitchen in his button down shirt, argyle sweater and dark slacks. He had dark bags under his eyes as well. Chase didn’t blink an eye, but it’d always startled me how light Dad was on his feet. He was taller than us and twice as broad as Chase and I. He made for a pretty intimidating looking lawyer.

“You look like shit,” Dad said, with his eyes on Chase. “People can barely get passed that scar on your face. You can’t look like a bum, too.”

“Yeah, well. Tough shit. If I am too indecent for them, then they can go fuck themselves.” Not sparing Dad a glance, Chase got up and poured himself more coffee. “When’d you get in
anyway? I didn’t hear you.”

“I was in my study. Make yourself look presentable. People will be stopping by to give their condolences.” He paused and sighed deeply. “I can’t believe I am saying this but take after Hunter.” He exited with an air of arrogance like he’d done in many instances.

Mariska

A
TALL OLDER MAN, whom Chase and Hunter bore a striking resemblance to, brushed against my shoulder in the hallway. I said good morning and apologized, thinking that it was due to my clumsiness, but I didn’t think he heard me.