Hero by Night (5 page)

But out of all the ­people in Independence Falls, the man with the panty-­melting smile didn't see it that way. Sitting here, eating a sandwich that desperately needed more jam to justify the label PB&J, her dog relaxed at her side, she felt as if who she was might be enough.

For now.

Tomorrow? She'd like to wake up one step closer to normal.

A plan formed in her mind as she took a sip of water. “Are you going to do it? Settle down?”

“I'm not interested in leading someone on who is hoping for a ring in a few months,” Chad said. “But I need to do something.”

“Helicopter logging means that much to you?”

“Yes.” There was passion and fire behind that one word. “I told you about my dad, right?”

She nodded. The man had been his hero. His words stuck with her because her father was a Hero, capital H, to most ­people, but he'd never been hers.

“Flying a helicopter was his dream. But when he left the army and faced the fact that he had four mouths to feed, he stuck with the family trucking business. He still found a way to take me and my brothers up in a helicopter and teach us the ropes.”

“You could enlist,” she said. “The army is always looking for pilots.”

Chad shook his head. “Logging is in my blood. This place, this land—­I love it here. I know it doesn't sound like much of a dream, flying around the forest and hauling out trees, but it's mine.”

Who was she to challenge a person's hopes and dreams? Lena slid another quarter of the more-­peanut-­butter-­than-­jelly sandwich out of the bag and took a bite. Her goals for the future included finding a job and maybe, if she could push past her fears, accepting a Silver Star for serving her country.

And finding her way back to that moment last night, when she'd hovered on the edge of an orgasm . . .

When he'd touched her, awakening her desires with his words, this charming man had offered a glimpse at what the future could hold for her. Maybe she was finally starting to recover from the shattering trauma of surviving in a war zone. Or maybe it was this man, and his wicked demands, that had delivered her one step closer to normal.

“What if you knew it was just for show? What if it was clear from the start that rings and promises were not part of the deal?” She lowered the sandwich to her lap, her gaze fixed on Chad's chiseled, too-­good-­to-­be-­true features. “What if I pretend to be your girlfriend?”

“A fake relationship?” Chad blinked and stole a quick glance at Hero as if checking in with her canine companion to see if she'd lost her mind before looking back at her. But her dog remained focused on his toy.

“We could go out on dates and hopefully change this town's perceptions of you. At least until you find a copilot.”

“Lena, I appreciate the offer. But I'm not sure that's the best idea—­”

“It is,” she said. “Everyone sees me as damaged and untouchable. They would never guess it was just for show.”

His brow furrowed. “You really want to do this? Go out to dinner with me and let Independence Falls think we're dating?”

“Yes. But I have an ulterior motive.” She drew a deep breath. “I want our relationship to be real at night. When we're alone.”

 

Chapter 6

C
HAD FOCUSED ON
the smudge of peanut butter on Lena's cheek. Nine times out of ten, he could read a woman's signals and follow her words, even if she said one thing and meant another. But with Lena, he needed clarification. It was like flying over a logging site. A little bit to the left led to trouble when you had a giant metal hook hanging down and a person on the ground trying to grab it.

“I'm going to need you to spell out what you're asking for,” he said.

She looked him straight in the eyes. For the first time since he'd met this mysterious, intriguing woman by Eric's pond, he saw a soldier. The wealth of determination in her expression blew him away.

“I know last night didn't end well—­”

“You're the first woman who has ever pulled a gun on me in the sack.”

“You're the first man to touch me and leave me wishing for more in nearly eighteen months,” she countered. “More if you count the fourteen months I spent in Afghanistan.”

“Wow,” he muttered, his mouth full of fake meat. What the hell else was there to say to that? “Wait, you think I healed you?”

Because if she thought last night had ended well . . . shit, what the hell had her sex life been like before she'd gone to war?

“No. But you made me think I'm closer to normal,” she said softly. “And that's my dream. I love Hero, but I hate the fact that I need him. And—­”

She drew a deep breath, her gaze dropping to the blanket. He had a feeling there was so much more she wasn't telling him. “And we have chemistry. I want you to touch me and whisper dirty things in my ear.”

Chad let out a slow breath, running his hands through his hair. “Lena, I'd like to help you. And for selfish reasons, I'd love to take you up on your offer. I want to fly almost as much as I want to breathe. But I'm not so sure I'm the right guy. I don't know the first thing about what you're going through. I never served. And aside from hanging out with Georgia, I don't know anything about PTSD.”

“I'm not asking you to be my shrink,” she said. “I have one of those. I want you to be my lover, or at least try. And I'll do my best to convince Independence Falls that we're dating. Of course, if the thought of sex with me turns you off—­”

“No.” He wanted to agree to her plan. It was as crazy as flying blind over a forest, but part of him wished he could make Lena
his
.

“If we do this,” he said, in his best no-­nonsense voice, “I don't set the limits. You do. Understood?”

She nodded.

“I'm game for anything. I want you, Lena. But I think we both know this is shaky ground. Promise me, you'll tell me no whenever you need to say the word. I don't need a reason. And I swear, I'll always listen.”

“I promise.” She held out her hand, her fingers trembling. “Then it's a deal?”

He gave her a gentle, quick handshake to seal their crazy plan before pulling back, allowing her space. “Deal. But I need you to promise me one more thing. When I'm in your bed, the gun is unloaded.”

She smiled. “No loaded weapons in bed. I can do that.”

He shook his head. Part of him knew this was wrong. She was hurting and he wasn't the man to help her. But part of him flat-­out
wanted
her. “We might both regret this, but how about dinner tonight? I could pick you at five?”

“It's a date.”

C
H
A
D
H
A
D
S
P
E
N
T
more nights than he wanted to admit in the apartment over the barn. But he'd never knocked on the door holding a bunch of flowers and a gift bag. And he'd never been nervous.

“Hi.” Lena opened the door wearing the same long dress she'd had on earlier. She'd added lip gloss, but one look told Chad he'd overdone it with the flowers.

“Hey.” He offered his trademark smile, the one that made most women melt. Except Lena. She drew her brows together, studying the offerings as if they were part of a foreign ritual she didn't understand.

“I'm ready to go,” she said, still eyeing the flowers.

“May I come in first?” he asked. “Put these in water?”

“Of course.” She stepped back from the door and turned to the stairs.

“What did you do this afternoon?” He followed her up to the studio. They reached the top step and Hero paused on the landing, glancing back at him. Chad smiled at the dog, but as with his owner, it didn't exactly lead to a doggie smile. The retriever just studied him for a moment longer before stepping into the studio.

“I spent the afternoon job hunting online at the library. And it was . . . discouraging.”

“Not much out there?” he asked, knowing the answer.

“No.”

They reached the apartment and he held out the bouquet. “Maybe these will brighten your day.”

“I didn't realize fake relationships came with flowers and presents.” She took the colorful arrangement, waiting for him to hand over the bag.

“This is just a little something to get us started,” he said, holding it out of her reach. “For your side of the bargain.”

She held out her hand. “Hand it over, Chad Summers.”

Hoping he wasn't making a huge mistake, running their deal into the ground before they left his family's property, he gave her the pink gift bag. She set the flowers on the two-­person table and pulled out the tissue paper. Then she reached inside, her blue eyes widening as she removed her present.

“You bought me a vibrator?” Lena turned the pink silicone sex toy over in her hands. “Thank you. But—­”

“Lena.” He reached out, careful not to touch her as he took the vibrator from her. “Let me show you why.”

“Now?”

He nodded, his courage building. The way she looked at the toy in his hands, she wanted the pleasure it promised. After hearing her desperate moans, her pleas for a release that had remained out of reach because he hadn't known the rules of the game last night, he wanted to send her soaring. But this time, he refused to scare her.

“What about dinner?” she asked.

“We'll get there. The night is still young. And since I'm grounded until we find a copilot, I don't have anywhere to be at the crack of dawn tomorrow. Do you?”

“No. The library is not open on Sunday.”

“Then we have all night,” he said, making a mental note to offer the computer at the house for her job search. But he didn't want to distract her now, not when she was focusing on his hands. “Is your gun unloaded?”

“Yes,” she said. “It's in my purse, but no bullets. And I can put Hero in the bathroom.”

“That would be good.” He glanced at the golden retriever sitting practically on his mistress's feet. Later, they would also talk about why she carried a revolver with her to dinner—­and everywhere else. He had a long list of questions. Some she might not wish to answer, and that was fine by him. But he'd like to know if she had a permit to carry a concealed weapon.

After he found out what noises she made when she came.

“Once he's settled, come sit on the bed.”

Lena obeyed, leading an unhappy Hero to the studio's bathroom. “Stay,” she murmured to the dog through the hollow wood door. The dog whined as she crossed the room, selected one of the chairs from the two-­person table, and positioned it in front of the door.

“In case he tries to break out,” she said.

“Good thinking,” he said. “Tomorrow, I'll fix the lock.”

Lena walked over to the bed and sat, every muscle in her body visibly tense. She might as well have been settling into the dentist's chair.

“You don't have to do this now,” she said. “We can go out first.”

“Lena, right now, ” he said, his voice low. “I'm going to make you come so hard you see stars and then I'll feed you.”

“You do this for all your dates?” she asked, her tone laced with sarcasm, her gaze fixed on the toy in his hands.

“No. Now close your eyes.” The lights were off in the small space, but the late afternoon/early evening sunlight poured in through the windows. And he welcomed it, wanting to see her and gauge her reactions. “I'm not going to touch you yet. I promise.”

“OK.” Eyes closed, her shoulders relaxed.

He stood in front of her, out of reach, but close enough that she could hear every word as he turned the vibrator over in his hand. “I'm not going to lay a hand on you tonight, Lena. But I'd like to finish what we started. I want to watch your beautiful face as you come, see your body bend and arch from the pleasure. And I want to know I brought you there, even if I have to do it with a toy between us.

“Tell me no, tell me to stop if it is too much, and I will. But right now, I want you to keep your eyes closed and lift your skirt. I want you to tease me with your long legs, beautiful.”

Eyes closed, head tilted back, her fingers clutched the fabric of her dress, slowly drawing it higher.

“That's it. Draw it out, make me want you,” he murmured, his gaze fixed on her bare skin. “Tonight. Right now. This is for you. But know that I want you, Lena. Looking at you, the thought of giving you pleasure, hearing you cry out, it all makes me hard.

“Now lift your hips,” he ordered. “I want your skirt at your waist.”

Lena rocked back on her elbows, her hips lifting high off the bed, her breasts thrust upward as her body formed a plank. That position—­
fuck
—­if only he could toss the toy aside and run his hands up her legs, touching and exploring her.

“Like this?” she asked, lowering her hips to the bed, her long skirt hiding the curve of her slim waist. Her soft voice, devoid of fear, told him she was with him. Ready.
Wanting.

“Yeah. Like that.” His gaze narrowed in on her white lacy underwear. “Did you wear those for me? Hoping I'd catch a glimpse under your skirt?”

“Yes,” she gasped.

“Good answer. Now slip them off.”

Raising her hips again, she wiggled the slip of lace off, kicking her panties away. Naked from the waist down, she leaned back on her elbows, her knees pressed together and her eyes closed.

Kneeling at her feet, he pressed a button and the vibrator moved in his hand, shaking and rotating. “Spread your legs, Lena. Let me see you. Spread them wide.”

“Chad—­”

“Take your time. I'm not going to touch you. Not with my hands. I just want to look at you. See if you're wet and ready. If you are, then, beautiful, I'm going to tease you with your new toy, let you feel the movement, waiting until you want more, until you ask for more,” he said, spelling out his game plan, hoping to dispel her fears—­and turning himself on in the process.

Slowly, her thighs parted, her feet heel-­toeing apart. And, oh yeah, she was wet and ready.

“You're so damn beautiful, Lena.” He inched closer, still on his knees. Fighting the urge to press his hands against her and bury his face between her spread legs, he touched the vibrator against her right thigh. She gasped, her back arching, her ass pressing into the bed as her legs moved together.

“Easy, Lena,” he murmured, mesmerized by her movements. He couldn't remember ever taking a seduction this slow, watching his partner's desire unravel piece by piece. It might be unusual, but it sure as hell worked for him. His cock agreed, pressing against his fly.

“Keep your legs apart,” he said. “Unless you want me to stop.”

“Don't stop,” she said, obeying his instructions, her knees falling open again. He rewarded her, slowly moving the toy up her thigh until the rotating head was poised at her entrance. Running the tip over her, up and down, gently at first, and then with the slightest pressure, he teased her. He learned where she liked to be touched, listening to her moan as the vibrator toyed with her clit before moving lower.

“More,” she said, that one word riding the boundary between command and plea. Her hands moved to her breasts, squeezing and pinching her nipples, as if trying to push herself closer to release.

“Oh hell, yeah,” he said, his voice a low growl. He welcomed the help, loving the way her body responded to her touch.

He pressed the vibrator inside her, watching the first inch disappear, then another, and another. Easing it in and out, he mimicked the thrusting motion his hips would make if he were inside her. Part of him wished it was his cock making her moan, her fingers falling away from her breasts and digging into the blankets. But damn, he loved watching her.

“I'm going to make you come now, Lena.”

S
H
E
C
LUNG TO
his words, wanting to believe him. Chad had stayed true to every promise he'd made her so far. He hadn't touched her, using the low, gravelly sound of his voice to connect the pulsing sensations racing through her body to the man kneeling between her splayed legs. But it was his respect for her boundaries, more than his dirty talk, that allowed her to open up, and really, truly feel the pleasure, the stirring of an orgasm, bigger and bolder than one delivered by her fingers.

Her world had been divided for eighteen long months between the things she could have and everything else. And now, with his words inciting her senses, and the vibrations whipping her body into a frenzy, her world was a riot of rushing, blending feelings.

Her hips bucked, seeking more. And he gave it to her, quickening the pace of his thrusts.

“That's it, beautiful, let go,” he murmured. “Come for me. I'm dying here, waiting to hear the sounds you make when you explode.”

She moaned and arched, feeling her muscles tense around the silicone penis as it shook inside her. He pulled it back, thrusting it in one last time, holding it there as she fell apart.