Heroine: The Husband's Cologne (9 page)

In the end I opted for a pair of tight black silk pants, a white blouse and a short black jacket: the corporate look.  To round it off, I made sure my lipstick was light and subtle. 

“Where shall we go?”  Erich asked me an hour later, at the wheel of his Jaguar. 

This surprised me; usually he knew exactly which restaurant we were going to beforehand.  After driving around a little we ended up in downtown Cologne, at a small tavern that happened to be serving some dinner.  Somehow things had gotten to be more natural between us.  I let him know that I didn't need to be whisked off to a luxurious restaurant every night, and he agreed, saying that he, too, found it delightful to stop off in a casual bar and just talk on occasion.  So that's what we did.  Until 11 that evening, we just hung out, drank a few beers, chatted about everything under the sun, but never once touched on the events of the last time. 

It was only on the way back to my apartment that I told him in passing that my husband would be in California for at least three weeks, and that I felt terribly alone at home.

“So why don't you move in with me for the time being?” he asked me.

I flinched, without knowing why.  But why shouldn't I move in with him after all?  I could always call Daniel from Erich's place, and wouldn't feel so alone in the meantime.  Besides, when I was alone with Erich I felt safe, and the sex between us was something peripheral anyway, and apart from that...

He waited down in the car while I went up and packed a few things.  I could always come back later and get anything else I still needed.  I scribbled a brief note to my landlady, telling her that I would be travelling for a few weeks.  It was 1 o'clock when we got to the place I would call my new home for a while.  We went straight to bed, but confined ourselves to a few cuddles, and soon I was fast asleep.

That night I had some vivid dreams, and as I awoke the next morning to find myself horny and wet. I remembered what the dreams had been about.  I was in the midst of a jeering crowd, tied to a vaulting horse.  My legs were outstretched so far above me that I couldn't see my feet anymore.  Horst was standing before me fucking me relentlessly, over and over again, and the dream had aroused me so much that I had had an orgasm in my sleep. 

The memory of the other night surfaced again so strongly that I masturbated in the shower.  Erich watched me with relish.

The next few days followed the same pattern. By the third morning I felt that we were almost carrying on like a married couple.  In the evenings we would sit awhile in front of the TV, then crawl into bed.  From time to time he would pleasure me with his tongue or his finger, and then we would cuddle each other to sleep.  It was my shower rituals in the mornings that he insisted on watching.  We spent the weekend on a vineyard in the Ahr region, where he evidently knew the owner.  We drank more than our fair share, but had a lot of fun.

I called Daniel every day like clockwork at 5 p.m., around the time he was getting into his office in Palo Alto.  Mostly he spoke of how thrilled he was about the sunshine and the work, the unhurried lifestyle and the gorgeous surroundings, little of which he actually got to see because of his schedule.  He was to spend the following weekend with a friend who was showing him around a new area, and promised to tell me all about it. On Monday he would call me in the afternoon, which always surprised me a little because I was usually in class. 

He was ecstatic about the areas he was visiting.  They had seen the Pacific Ocean, driving along an endless highway southward, ending up in a former monastery on Mount Carmel. I thought to myself
near the Sinai Peninsula? 
No, he said, Carmel was also a place in southern California, but was actually called “Carmel by the Sea.”  On Sunday he was in San Francisco, doing the whole tourist thing.  The Golden Gate Bridge, China Town, and the city and the  trolley  tour, just as we had seen it on TV.  He was so enthused about it that for a moment the distance between us seemed to vanish. I was happy for him. 

But, as I put down the phone, feelings of loneliness and longing welled up inside me again.

On Tuesday, Erich had business to attend to, and asked me to go to class on my own.  Up until then we had always left the house together, and he had stood waiting for me after my lectures.  On this occasion, after I had finished the lecture, I took the subway and the bus to his place, to which he had given me a key.  As I entered, it was eerily quiet, and I became a little afraid. To distract myself, I began looking around the various rooms.

“You can use any of the rooms that you wish, and look around all you want.  I have no secrets from you.  The only thing I ask is that you don't make a mess in my office,” he told me before we parted and after he had given me a long kiss. 

Well, he's clearly not the suspicious type
, I had thought, chuckling when he had said that to me. 

Considering that he had given me permission, I proceeded to snoop through every room.  I was already well acquainted with the kitchen, dining room and living room.  His study on the upper floor looked like a paper landfill. The place was covered with all manner of blueprints, sketches, documents and metallic objects. The furniture was made of cherry wood, and in the center of a lavish writing desk there was an inlaid dark-green leather panel with gold trimming. A door led into a smaller room, still larger than my entire apartment, in which stood a file cabinet that reached up to the ceiling. How it was possible to make any more of a mess than there already was in these two rooms was beyond me.  But it was sacred to him, so I didn't touch anything and moved on.

I found some other rooms that were intended for guests, then some more bathrooms, storage rooms and finally an extensive library. I remembered having been here with Erich, and proceeded to open the wood carved doors of those cabinets, which didn't contain academic books.  There I found a Danish-made stereo system, which looked to have cost as much as his car.  Next to it was an equally extravagant TV set, a DVD player and several other items.

Suddenly, I heard the door being shut downstairs and the sound of footsteps entering the house.  I was startled, until I heard Erich's voice calling up to me. 

“I'm up here in the library,” I replied, as I hopped my way down the broad staircase.

He met me halfway on the stairs, took me into his arms and kissed me at length with his tongue, which got me little flustered.

“What do you say we do a little cooking for ourselves?” he asked, looking at me with his puppy dog eyes.

“Great idea,” I answered, “what would you like me to prepare?”

“Let's make something together, after all you're not the house cook,” he laughed.  It was a comment that heightened my affection for him.

He was a remarkable cook, I must admit.  I could only have prepared a basic dinner myself. Erich on the other hand, conjured up something truly exquisite.  An hour later we were we sitting in front of a complete menu and a bottle of red wine.  Both of us preferred this to eating in a fancy restaurant, and even so there was no shortage of candles and flowers on the table, all of which made for a lovely dinner.

“You feel like relaxing a little?  How about a swim and a sauna?” he inquired, after we had cleared away the dishes. The rest would be taken care of by his maid.

“A swim?
  You mean you also have a pool in your house?”

“Sure.  Didn't you find it earlier?”

“No, where is it?” I asked, looking up at him.  I was astounded.

“Come with me, I'll show it to you,” he said, grinning.

“But I don't have a bathing suit with me,” I protested without thinking, to which he gave a hearty laugh.  It took me a few seconds to realize the absurdity of my remark and we both chuckled.  I called Daniel quickly, who, judging by his offhand reply was very busy.  Just a day ago this would have hurt me, but now I was in much better spirits.

Erich grabbed another bottle of Champagne from the fridge and two glasses from the cupboard, and we made our way down the wide steps to the basement.  On the way he stopped to pick up a plastic bag that stood before the kitchen, and then proceeded fully loaded down the staircase.

I had seen both the gym and the sauna, and now was curious to visit the pool.  Erich led me around the sauna and then, to my surprise, there was another staircase going down farther. We descended the steps and finally, amid the flood of lights that Erich switched on, I saw the blue sheen of a swimming pool.  It wasn't particularly big, but big enough to swim laps in.  My mouth hung open. 

Along the edge there were six or seven white lounge chairs, and a bench took up one entire side of the wall.  Erich took some terrycloth towels and two bathrobes from a nearby cupboard.

“For later,” he said winking at me. I giggled like a girl.  He placed the Champagne and the glasses on a small white table and then began undressing.

“I'll be right back,” I said and raced up to the bathroom in order to shower.  When I got to the steps I turned back quickly and grabbed a bathrobe.  A few minutes later I came back with soaking wet hair and my bathrobe demurely closed.  Underneath I had nothing but my high heels on. 

Erich was already in the pool, naked of course.  Oddly, I found myself feeling shy, as if I were about to do something forbidden, and I averted my gaze.  Plucking up my courage, I then opened my bathrobe. 

Erich's eyes took on a lustful look which I had become familiar with and I suddenly thought of a way that I could entice him even more.  I didn't untie the knot of the robe for the moment; instead, I turned my back to him and let the robe slowly glide off my shoulders and down my back.  Just as it was reaching my behind, I stopped short, and then let it fall off completely.  I then bent over as if I were adjusting something on my shoes, so that Erich got an eyeful of my entire posterior, which was always to his liking. 

The expression in his eyes confirmed this as I turned back around.  He was horny, and had he not been impotent, his erection would surely have made waves.  But for the moment, that was wishful thinking.  I hopped into the water at the shallow end, without shoes, of course, having kicked those off to the side. 

Erich swam over to
me, hugged me and after a lingering kiss, he whispered in my ear:

“That was fantastic.  I'm crazy about you.”

I want to have a kid with this man,
the thought flashed through my head before my conscious mind was able to catch up and dismiss it as nonsense.  In that moment, I think I would have yielded to any man present in the hopes of fulfilling this wish.  The warm water, the soft lights, the quiet lapping of the waves at the edge of the pool; I felt as if I might dissolve into thin air at any moment. 

Erich continued to caress me. I closed my eyes, reclined onto my back and proceeded to float around him in slow strokes.  I heard Erich splashing awkwardly through the water in my direction.  Then I felt his strong hand under my back.  I let myself sink and he carried me gently through the lapping waves, as they rippled over my stomach. I lost all sense of time and place, and could barely tell where I began or where the world ended.  It was divine. I lay in his arms for a moment, like a young girl; shutting my eyes, my head nestled in the crook of his arm; I took in the arousing odor of his manliness. 

A long, probing kiss woke me from momentary trance.  I opened my eyes and looked up into his dark pupils.  I wanted to become one with this man, to belong exclusively to him, impotence be damned.  And who knows, we might always find a means to solve the problem. 

“Let's get out of the water,” he proposed in a whisper.  I nodded, half-dazed, and he placed me gingerly at the edge of the pool. 

“How long were we in the water?” I asked him, as I was on my feet again. 

“Almost 30 minutes,” he replied.  I raised my hand to my mouth in shock.

“You carried me that way in the water for the entire time?”

“Yes, but you weren't that heavy.  This water contains salt from the Dead Sea.  You practically float by yourself.”

“You're lying,” I squeaked in mock anger, and he laughed uproariously.  I took him in my arms and laid my head against his chest. 

“C'mon, let's get you dried off and then I'll rub some oil on you,” he proposed.  With a look of gratitude, I let him lead me to the line of benches along the wall.  From the cupboard he got a few blankets and a pillow, and I lay down on my back.  I heard him rummaging around a little, and watched as he placed a number of small candles all over the room, lighting each one as he went.  He walked over to the stairway and switched off the main lights, leaving only two of the underwater pool lights on, which projected a spectacular display of patterns onto the white ceiling.  I felt as though in heaven. 

My lover proceeded to heat up some oil with the aid of a candle, as I had seen him do at our little party the week before.  Then he poured the scented lukewarm ointment on my body and spread it leisurely and delicately over my skin.

“Turn over,” he whispered in my ear.  I obeyed and turned over onto my stomach. He could have demanded anything of me in that moment, I was his.

He resumed his caresses, starting at my feet and moving slowly upward.

“I have a surprise for you,” he whispered in my ear.  “Can I show it to you?”

My interest piqued, I raised my head up and looked him in the eyes: