Hidden Mortality (25 page)

Chapter 27

Seth lay in the back of the van as they drove away. His body ached as if it would never be whole or free from pain again. Looking up, he saw Cara glance back over the seat at him. The rage he felt when he entered the cellar and found Vincent had been overpowering. Matcher had run to Cara, but Vincent threw the boy across the room like a rag doll.

The urge to rip Vincent limb from limb was strong, but it wasn’t enough. Hurling Vincent into a wine rack and seeing him collapse to the floor, wasn’t enough either. When he turned to Cara, Seth accepted he was too late. She was bloody and lifeless, a knife impaled in her heart.

As he pulled the dagger free, he knew what had to be done. Vincent would die and so would he. It would all come to an end. It had been foolish to ever expect more. Overpowering Vincent was easy, too easy.

As he plunged the dagger into the other man’s chest, the darkness of death drew Seth too. A voice he hadn’t heard in so long called to him. It was Rosie’s telling him to return to Cara. He remembered floating above his dead body with Rosie’s ghost next to him. He’d watched Cara cut herself and paint his wounds with her blood. What had he done to deserve such love? This wonderful woman made his heart soar with affection for her

She loves you so much, Seth. Don’t leave her like this.

I’m sorry I couldn’t save you, Rosie.

You have. He’s gone and I’m free.

Cara had breathed life into him. He watched as a beam of light shone from her and attached itself to his floating form. She was drawing him back. He could sense in her mind how much she loved him. His lungs felt as if they would explode as he was drawn back into his body with a jolt. His body arched off of the floor in pain. It meant he was alive.

Seth’s head ached as things came into focus. He must have passed out. He was in some kind of moving contraption that made a strange burring noise.

“We’re almost home,” A woman said. She reached down and grasped his hand. Did he know her? It was dark in the vehicle and he couldn’t make her face out.

Home, a picture of a cottage with a forge came to mind. The vehicle stopped and they made their way inside a large building and upstairs. He had expected home to be the cottage. The woman helped him to the bedroom and sat next to him on the bed.

He couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer. “I need to go home. Take me home.”

“Later. First you need to shower and then rest. It will be all right, Seth. We’ll go home tomorrow.”

She knew his name. She had eyes like Rosie. One blue, one green but she wasn’t Rosie. He had a feeling something bad had happened but the thoughts were just out of his reach as he blacked out again. He stood in the cubicle as the water sprayed him. Everything was strange. The way the water flowed, the lights. His mind struggled through a haze to make sense of it. Peering in the mirror he saw fresh cuts on his body. They were the same cuts he had seen on Rosie. What was happening here? He made his way to the bedroom and hoped sleep would bring some answers.

Cara slept for a few hours after her shower washed away the blood from her body and hair. What she needed now was food. Seth didn’t stir as she got up and left the room. Rachel was in the living room and Cara wasn’t surprised. If she were Matcher, she would have wanted some closeness and normality around her. When he saw her, Matcher said Daniel was on the way over with Jeff and wanted to know what happened.

When the other men arrived, Cara told them everything and was amazed they actually believed it. It was official. Her friends were now as crazy as she was. The phone rang. Cara picked up the receiver and listened, then agreed. After she hung up, she said, “That was Inspector Seps. Says he needs to talk to me down at the station. This is going to be interesting.”

Seth felt as if he’d been pulled backwards from a dream to wakefulness. A woman perched beside him on a bed. She smiled at him. He didn’t know her, but she had a beautiful smile and reminded him of Rosie. If he hadn’t been a married man, he could have been tempted by a smile like that. Then, it all came back to him. His wife was dead and Rosie was missing.

Where was he? He should get himself home, sober up and find Rosie before something happened to her. He would never forgive himself if it did.

A light shone above him. It was like nothing he had seen before. A white globe glowed with no evidence of a flame. What was this place? Who was this woman?

“Where am I?” He saw the look of concern pass over the woman’s face. She had expected him to know her.

“What do you mean, Seth? You’re at my flat.” She reached out and touched his arm.

He pulled away. How did she know his name?

“Who are you?” He watched tears form in the woman’s eyes.

“What do you mean? I’m Cara.”

The name triggered pain. Agony coursed through him. He curled up in a ball, hoping the sensation wouldn’t tear him apart. Flashes of memories came to him, disconnected pictures. One thing he remembered was his home, his cottage. He remembered Rosie coming to him in a vision. She was dead. He turned to Cara.

“Can you take me home?”

Through silent tears, she nodded.

Cara was glad Jeff agreed to ride Seth’s bike back to the cottage. Seeing it out in front of the block of flats for the past month had been like having Vincent twist the knife he stabbed into her all over again. Jeff looked well now. It was fun to see Daniel find out something new about his partner. She could see them both out riding some big bike now.

Daniel had driven the van out to the cottage. Janet showed them where to park the bike around the side. She had been polite. She offered them tea and her famous cookies, but Seth stayed in the forge.

“He rarely comes out. Then again, he never did much before. He said he remembers me. At first. I didn’t think it was true but now it’s different. Maybe my cooking has brought back some memories.” Janet shrugged her shoulders.

Cara thought being at the cottage would help the anguish, but it made it worse. How could he not remember what they had together? She wished this was a dream, but she never seemed to wake up. Janet kept talking to Jeff and Daniel. Cara couldn’t focus on what they were saying. Maybe, if she ran out there and threw herself into his arms he would recall something. A hand touched hers. It was Janet.

“I was just saying. I don’t know how you managed to get him home that day. I struggle to get him in the car. He used to love that bike. Don’t know if he’ll ever ride it again now. He acts like he’s never seen a car or bike before.”

Cara heard a door slam outside. Her heart beat wildly even if her brain told her differently. There was no point in getting her hopes up.

“He knows you’re here. He won’t come in. He goes to ride Dart about this time every afternoon. Then, he goes back to the forge. I’ve told him he’s a fool. He was lucky to find someone like you, but he doesn’t understand. If I was him, I’d be locked up by now I’m sure. A person isn’t meant to live as long as him.”

Cara needed to go, but had one more thing to do. She reached inside her handbag and pulled out an envelope.

“Can you give him this? I’ve written down everything. Maybe, it will trigger something. If it doesn’t, then at least I tried.” Cara didn’t bother to keep back the tears.

Janet walked around the table and hugged her. “I don’t think I should be half as calm as you, my dear. I’d have grabbed a rolling pin and smashed some sense into that stupid head of his.”

“I would if I thought it would work.”

As they walked over to the van, Cara couldn’t ignore the sound of a horse galloping nearby. She remembered the first day they had been together. They had watched his beautiful warm blood running around the field. It seemed like another lifetime. She was a fool but couldn’t draw her gaze away from the field near the cottage. He pulled the horse to a halt at the gate.

Their gazes met for a moment. Cara wanted to fool herself, but she couldn’t. There was no look of recognition there. If anything there was anger.

Sitting in the van, she fumbled with her seatbelt. Why did it choose now not to work? She turned to Jeff and Daniel. “For God’s sake. Get me away from here.”

Chapter 28

The world was at her feet. Well, hers and Daniel’s feet to be more precise. The business had been all that kept her going this last six months. She had accepted that she would never have another man in her life except Merlin. She would become a crazy old cat lady. Her silly old cat had lived through all her traumas blissfully unaware. She would do spells and watch Seth in her mirror. After a while she stopped. She realized she was doing herself more harm than good and had to move on.

She’d spent long hours organizing menus, cooking, and arranging staff and equipment for their functions. They routinely did large gatherings now. In a strange way, all the new business had been a blessing.

Everyone mothered her for a while, until she screamed and told them to back off. She had survived losing a baby, almost dying, and an incredibly old serial killer trying to murder her. She would survive living without Seth. At least she’d keep telling herself that. Perhaps one day she might actually believe it.

Inspector Seps had come around to see how she was getting on. He said they accepted Vincent had been the killer. No one was sad that someone had knocked him off. The investigation into who had killed him wasn’t getting much attention. There was always some new job on the horizon. He was definitely looking at retiring and had bought a little cottage in the South of France. The experience had made him realize life was too short and he needed to enjoy it.

Jeff had invested in the company. They didn’t have to prepare food in their apartments anymore. They had a base now, a small failed restaurant. They were purchasing equipment that in the long run would save them on hire fees.

Daniel was still trying to convince her to go into the wedding business. So far she had managed to fend him off. The thought of seeing happy couples tie the knot wasn’t something she could cope with right now, unless it was Jeff and Daniel of course.

Matcher took their bookings. He was becoming invaluable at organizing things. It meant paying him more, but he was worth it. Cara still tried to do as much preparation as possible especially for the small meals. Their prices had gone up with their increase in bookings, but none of the clients complained.

She and Daniel sat at her breakfast bar. They were discussing options for a meal for her mother and father. She had managed to put them off for months. The idea of driving past Vincent’s house was almost as bad as going to Seth’s cottage again.

Why did her stomach still turn over at the thought of Seth? At heart, she knew she was a hopeless romantic. She had foolishly believed life would turn out well.

The phone rang. She jumped. It was stupid. It wouldn’t be him. It never was. This time it was perfect Peter Connor from
The Evening Post
. What on earth did he want? Even while he attempted to listen in, Daniel continued to pretend to check on menus.

“That was Connor,” Cara said when she hung up. “He wants us to do lunch for him at
The Post
on Thursday. He has a TV executive coming that’s doing a series on local chefs and their businesses. He wants to include us.”

Daniel was reaching for his mobile phone as she spoke. He would be texting Jeff no doubt. “That’s brilliant, Cara.”

“I’m not so sure. He mentioned that it tickled the fancy of the TV executive that we cooked a murderer his last meal. I’m sure he only suggested us because he thinks there’s a story in this. I want to leave that behind, Daniel.”

“This is too good a deal to pass up. Vincent’s old news now.”

Cara stiffened at the mention of his name. Daniel was right though. This was what they had been striving for. She just didn’t have the heart to tell him she didn’t care anymore. Then again, if she didn’t keep busy with work, she might give up altogether.

“Okay. I didn’t say I wouldn’t do it, did I?” Cara answered.

Another three months and still no phone call.
Stop waiting, you fool
.

The TV program had been filmed. Jeff, Daniel, Matcher and Rachel were coming around to watch the show with her.

Cara had two bottles of bubbly in the fridge. She thought they would be used for drowning sorrows rather than celebrating. She knew she had come over badly. Daniel shone as usual. She had to swallow her words. They all came over well, even when she had been asked about her most famous meal for the notorious slasher-killer.

Daniel came in with a funny line. “You could say our meals are to die for.”

The presenter laughed and replied, “Well, if this was my last meal, I’d be going as a happy man. Who knew turkey and pheasant pie could taste so good. That Dingle Delight is a winner too.”

After the show, the first bottle of champagne went down easily. The second was following quickly on its tail.

“Before we all get too merry, I want to say something.” Daniel stood up.

“Yeah, we know you’re the best chef in the world,” Matcher called out.

“That’s true. It isn’t what I wanted to say. Surprise, surprise. Two years ago we started this business and it’s gone beyond what we imagined. I know the sky’s the limit. I also know we’ll all pull each other down, if we get too big for our boots.”

“Get on with it.” Cara teased sticking out her tongue at Daniel who did the same in return. “So mature.”

“It’s just that we achieved this while losing someone close to us. We’ve been through more than people deserve to go through. Anyway I’ll stop rambling. I know Cara will agree with me. I wanted to raise a toast to Shona.”

They all raised their glasses but Cara could only sip as they cheered. He knew how to make her smile and hugged her.

“Also to all of us, and the fact that we’re still sane, well sort of, I think,” Daniel said.

“Are you sure you are?” Rachel giggled.

“And another toast to you, Cara. I don’t know where you get your strength from, but we could all do with some.”

Cara smiled. She didn’t feel any strength at all, just a numbing loss she covered with work.

“I think that’s enough from you for one night.” Jeff grabbed Daniel’s arm and pulled him back down beside him. “Now, there’s something I’d like to say.”

Daniel looked confused which made Cara smile. Jeff took Daniel’s hand in his.

“Daniel, I want to ask you something that’s been on my mind for a while. I wanted to do it with our friends around. I’m hoping I’ll get the right response.” Jeff got down on one knee. “Daniel Peter Kenner, will you marry me?”

Daniel’s mouth hung open. It was the first time Cara had seen him speechless. It was wonderful. Rachel looked like she was going to cry and Cara would join her.

Daniel still hadn’t said anything. Jeff raised an eyebrow in a questioning look.

“Yes. Oh my God, Yes.” Daniel hugged and kissed Jeff.

More champagne was opened. For the first time in a long time, Cara thought she had something to look forward to.

“Can I be a bridesmaid?” Rachel asked, causing Matcher to shake his head.

“Only if Tecquin will be an usher?” Daniel said, grinning at Matcher.

“Is that your first name? It’s lovely. Why don’t you use it?” Rachel asked.

“Got whacked too many times at school. It didn’t exactly fit my image. Yes, I’ll be an usher, but you’ll pay for that, Daniel.”

“I’m really happy for you both,” Cara said. “That doesn’t mean I want to do the catering. I expect to be guest of honor though.” She hugged them so tight. It was good to have nice things happening. It called for more bubbly. To hell with the hangover champagne always gave her.

The phone rang and she jumped as always. She would have to stop this. It was silly to keep thinking it would be him. Tonight showed life was changing. That was the way it would go.

“Hello.” Someone was talking. Cara couldn’t hear who it was over the noise of everyone celebrating

“Janet, is that you? Just one minute.” She didn’t need to say anything. The room went silent.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to interrupt you, Cara. You sound like you’re having a party. I just wondered if you could pop over and see me.”

“See you?” Cara felt dumb repeating the words.

“I’m off to Paris soon to stay with Henri. I wanted you to see something before I go.”

“Will Seth be there?” It hurt to say his name out loud.

“His buyer is coming from London the day after tomorrow. He’ll be out all day.”

“It’s just…”

“I know dear, it’s hard. I don’t know how you’ve coped.”

“I’ll see you then.” Cara had to stop the conversation before the tears came.

Cara picked up her keys and put them back down again. Why had she agreed to go today? No good would come of it. She would just rub salt in an old wound, which was a silly thing for a chef to do. She would phone and tell Janet she wasn’t coming. It was the past, better left there.

As she picked up the phone, the intercom went. It was Matcher. She let him in the apartment, made him coffee and they sat down.

“Cara, I need to talk to you about the night you saved Seth before you go there today. I would have said something the other night, but I think we were all a bit too pissed to say the least.”

“Go on.”

“I saw your auras combine and it was about the only good thing I observed that night. Seth had always looked grey before. When you breathed into him, it was as if the air you put in was coming out of his mouth as a glowing mist. I mean you were shining like a bloody beacon. It was good for you. Because when I walked into the cellar, you had no color in your aura at all. Whatever happened to you while I was out cold worked wonders?”

She had never told anyone about Rosie. She wasn’t sure why.

“The lines on his body you touched glowed like sunlight. Both of you were shining. Light shone out of you and pulled his spirit back. Your bodies were so white, it hurt my eyes. I saw your physical bodies. Above them were, well it was the two of you and you were entwined. You were like beautiful white ghosts I could see through. It was hard to see where one of you started and the other finished. Even Inspector Seps saw it. I don’t think he would have gone along with all the crazy shit otherwise.”

“That’s wonderful, Matcher. It doesn’t change things. He still can’t remember.”

“All I’m saying is, don’t give up. If there’s such a thing as a person having a soul mate, he’s yours. I saw it that night.”

She wanted to believe what Matcher said but it would mean a few hours of hoping and then nothing. A person could only cope with so much nothing.

“Okay. I’ll go, but don’t expect miracles.”

Cara couldn’t stop shaking. Parking outside of his cottage made it all so fresh again. It brought back memories of the first day when she’d seen him here and they admired the roses. How could they have gone through so much and yet he couldn’t remember anything? Rosie had warned her this could happen. She had told her to try and make him remember. She had with the letter but it hadn’t worked. What was she supposed to do? Beg someone who thought she was a stranger.

Looking at the bush surrounding the gate she thought about Rosie. She said they would have time together, but couldn’t say how long. In truth, Cara thought, she had nothing. She had a memory, but he didn’t even have that.

What was the point in beating the bad guy and going through everything if she didn’t win something, anything? She was supposed to get the guy. That’s what happened in stories, only this was real life.

That was it, she decided. She couldn’t face this. She didn’t want to be around anything that would remind her of Seth. She turned back to the van. Whatever Janet had wanted to show her, it didn’t matter.

“Cara,” Janet called out, as she beamed at her from the front door of the cottage. “I’m glad you’re here. Come inside.”

Cara slowly smiled back. Did it matter if the owner of the cottage thought she was some stranger who rambled on about insane things? Things like great sex? Someone who had actually said he loved her and for the first time in a long time, she had believed it. He had even made her start believing that she loved herself.

The kitchen was as always a comfortable place to be. Janet put the teapot down and opened the tin containing her cookies. Every step hurt, seeing this place and not holding Seth, or kissing him. He had made her smolder. She wanted those emotions back, but that wasn’t possible.

“I saw you on the television the other night. You’re a natural in front of the camera, you know. I think some of those chefs put on an act, but not you.” Janet poured the tea.

“Everybody was probably yawning away. Did Seth see it?”
Stupid woman, why are you asking? If he had, he obviously didn’t pine for you and rush to the phone.

“I told him when the show came on. Like most evenings he spent the night out there. After what happened, he may have changed in some ways. As to being a sullen, grumpy loner, that hasn’t changed. Before I take you out there, I need to talk to you.”

Janet glowed. She might be sixty, but she was animated. At twenty-nine, Cara felt tired and jaded. She had been wrong to come here. “Listen, Janet. I’m sure that you’re well-meaning, but…”

“Don’t ‘but’ me anything. Honestly, I think you are as stubborn as he is sometimes,” Janet scolded.

“Okay, I’ll listen.” Cara stared into her mug.