Authors: Brittney Cohen-Schlesinger
“No she’s not, Jessen,” she slurred, pronouncing Jensen’s name awkwardly.
“Yes, she is. Now come on,” he said, bending down to pick her up.
“Drink! Drink! Drink!” she chanted, chugging her beer.
“Tory, you’re incredibly drunk. Please come inside with me.”
“Not unless you kiss me,” she winked, burping.
Oh, great.
“I cannot do such a thing. I’m sorry.”
“But I
need
you!”
“What you
need
is water,” he snickered.
“NO! I need
you
!”
I’ve had enough!
I came out from behind the giant rock, the wind fierce.
“Tory!” I yelled, projecting my voice louder than the roaring wind. “What is going on here?”
“Leave us alone!” Tory yelled back. “Jessen is
mine
!”
“No, he’s not.” I glanced at Jensen who looked concerned.
“You dun know’is feelins!”
“Trust me, I do.”
“How?” she squinted her eyes at me. I opened my mouth to speak when Jensen answered.
“I belong to Avalon, Tory. Not you.” Her face suddenly fell.
“He can’t love you!” she shouted, beer spilling from the bottle. “Because he loves
me!
”
Jensen stepped in between Tory and I. “Cool it,” he told her.
“Jessen, tell’er!” she growled, stumbling forward a bit. “Tell’er you love me! Tell’er you need me and wanna be with me!”
“You’re drunk,” I said, voice flat.
“I’ll take you inside,” Jensen said. “You need to lie down.”
“NO!” she shrieked, pushing him aside to get to me - aiming the glass bottle at my head. Jensen moved quickly in front of me, catching the bottle before it could hurt me. Beer poured all over his shirt but he didn’t seem to mind. He was more concerned about me.
“Are you alright, sweetheart?” he asked, spinning around to see my face, both hands on my cheeks.
“Yeah,” I said, a little shaken up. He held my hand firmly in his.
“You need rest,” Jensen told Tory. “You almost hurt Avalon.”
“I dun care! I need you!”
“You’re devastated over your breakup with Adam. You don’t want
me
.”
“But I do!” she exclaimed between violent, painful sobs. “I love you, Adam!
AdamAdamAdam
, I love you so much!”
I was in awe. This was the ultimate breakdown I’d been waiting for but never expected to see. Tory was always much stronger than this, stronger than me, stronger than anyone I’d ever known. She fell to ground, hands covering her face. She had completely fallen apart because of what Adam had done to her; and I couldn’t even do anything to help her, for fear she might gouge my eyes out with her acrylic nails.
“I’m not Adam,” Jensen told her. “I’m Jensen. Now let’s get you inside.”
She shook her head and sobbed in her hands. “I miss’m so much!” she cried. “Why’d he’avta cheat on me? And why do ya gotta leave, Ava?”
My heart broke for her.
“Leave?” Jensen inquired, looking at me. “What is she talking about?”
Crap, Tory. Thanks a lot.
I grew closer to Jensen and whispered, “I made that up in case something happened to us with this whole Shadow Angel thing. She thinks we’re moving to Houston, Texas.”
That will do for now.
Jensen’s eyebrow rose, then turned his attention back to my drunk friend. “Tory, come on.” He lifted her up and carried her across the sand, the moon lighting the way. I walked three steps behind him, mildly shocked at the circus that was performed in front of me. We went around the back way; bringing back scary memories from last year.
He
brought me up this way. But instead of us walking into my room, we dropped Tory off in hers. I was going to help her change when Jensen told me he’d just tuck her in and would be out in a minute.
Thirty seconds went by when I heard a thump to my right. The long hallway looked longer than usual. People danced, laughed and drank around me as I descended the hallway. It felt like someone was watching me. I peered over the banister to find many bodies dancing to a slow song. I drew my attention to the left where I saw a couple kissing. I refrained myself from staring by looking to my right. A dark figure slipped into a room at the far end of the hallway and slammed the door shut. My heart was about to climb out of my chest when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I flinched and yelped in response.
“Hey, hey,” Jensen said. “It’s me.” He hugged me tightly.
“I’m sorry,” I said into his shirt. “I’m just really jumpy.” His shirt smelled like Tory’s beer.
“I noticed,” he laughed.
“Must be the alcohol.”
“One beer got you like this?” he smirked.
I nodded. “I told you I’m a lightweight,” I said sarcastically.
“Yeah, you weren’t kidding.” He tucked my long hair behind my ear. “Are you relatively drunk?”
“Tipsy,” I responded. “How’s Tory?”
“She’s sleeping,” Jensen said. I felt like she was our child in this instance.
“Good,” I told him, staring at the floor. There were red cups all over the place.
Boy, did those cleaning ladies have a job ahead of them in the morning . . . .
“She was mumbling about Adam and some girl named Madeline.”
“That must be the girl Adam left her for,” I inquired, realizing Tory was hiding more things than she’d led on. The gory details.
“I wouldn’t doubt it.”
The party was still hustling and bustling all around us. I could smell the alcohol emulating off the walls. The noise was immensely loud - between the music and mingling people - I couldn’t concentrate. My stress level seemed to increase every day now. To be blunt I was getting sick and tired of it. This party wasn’t helping any, especially not with what I just went through with Tory.
“Ava,” Jensen spoke low, his mouth next to my ear, “come with me.”
Before turning to leave I stared back at the closed door down the hall; my paranoia worsening inside me. Silently, he took me into the room on the right side of the hallway, opening the window and letting the harsh breeze drift inside. A few green leaves fell in. Rain was pouring down now, heavy and thick. I could barely make out the figures dancing in the rain. The fireworks were barely going off; and everyone was frustrated.
“The Shadow Angel will be here soon.” My stomach was in knots.
“I know,” Jensen said. “There’s only a matter of time before he or she will arrive.”
“The weather’s getting pretty bad,” I commented, shutting the window.
“Avalon,” Jensen said, walking over to me, pulling me closer to his muscular body. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” I blushed as he kissed me. Not once or twice . . . but many times. That’s when we sat on the bed. The rain pitter-pattered angrily on the roof of the beach house, every second getting louder and louder. I tried drowning it out, focusing on Jensen’s lips upon my own. I clung to him, my hand gripping his hair as he climbed on top of me. Things were getting heated pretty fast and I didn’t care. I wanted Jensen, I needed him. If I didn’t do something now I’d never get the chance to. So I pulled off his shirt - momentarily admiring his perfectly chiseled abs - and continued kissing his soft lips. His breath was intoxicating, his perfection drawing me in.
His strong arms held me against him, firm and steady. I found myself trying to catch my breath on multiple occasions and this excited me. I loved Jensen with my whole heart, with every fiber of my being. That’s how I knew what we were doing was right.
However, Jensen didn’t think so. “I’m sorry, Ava,” he said fast, “I’m so sorry,” as he pulled himself off of me.
“For what?” I asked, appalled, upset that he pulled away from me.
“I was taking things too far.”
“You were making out with your girlfriend,” I corrected him, laughing.
“I was?”
“Yes,” I responded, pulling him to me again, kissing him.
“This doesn’t feel uncomfortable to you?” he asked, concern on his angelic face. His blue eyes were shining. I placed my hand on his cheek, feeling the auburn stubble beneath my fingertips.
“No. Why do you ask?”
“You don’t realize where we are?” His eyebrow rose.
I didn’t understand what he was saying. That was, until I looked around. The room looked different, bare. Only a mattress with a white comforter set was in here.
We were in
my
room. The one I’d been raped in last year.
Suddenly, my heart sped up and my breathing accelerated. “Why would you bring me in here? And on the anniversary of when it happened?” I gasped, losing feeling throughout my body.
“I didn’t bring you here to frighten you,” he said. “More to show you that it’s just a room…a room filled with a vile past. But it’s simply a room, nonetheless. There’s nothing to be afraid of anymore.”
“I can’t be in here. I have to go.” But my actions belied my words as I clung to Jensen.
“Avalon, calm down.” He held my face in his warm hands. “Everything’s going to be alright. I’m here. He’s not.”
I thought back to that night . . . in this room. Where it all happened. And shuddered violently. Jensen held me tight against him, a motion to reassure me that he wasn’t going anywhere.
“He’s not here,” he repeated softly. “I’m here to protect you.”
My body stiffened. “I don’t want to think about that night anymore.”
“You don’t have to.” Jensen cupped my cheek with his hand and kissed me tenderly.
A loud clap of thunder shook the walls, vibrating through the entirety of the giant beach house. The lights flickered on and off. Just then, the power went out. I felt Jensen’s body stiffen against mine as he rose from the bed, his back towards me as he headed for the window overlooking the bright moonlit sky. The blaring music no longer played, instead, many moans could be heard from the partygoers due to their disappointment. I heard someone say they’d search for some candles for the time being.
“Jensen,” I spoke his name. There was no answer. “Is something the matter?”
“No, nothing.”
“Jensen, talk to me.” I knew when he was hiding something from me. I could hear it in his voice.
He refused to turn around. Instead, he sighed heavily and said, “Avalon, have you ever noticed that your curiosity isn’t needed?”
“E-excuse me?” I stammered.
“And you’re always whining about something,” he added.
“I’m sorry, I -”
He cut me off with a loud laugh. It hurt my ears. “You’re so depressing to be around, too. Why do I even waste my time with you?” His tone was bitter and nasty. Tears began to fall. “Ugh, don’t cry,” he complained. “Clean yourself up.”
I sniffled, then wiped my eyes. What was up with him? It was like he was a completely different person.
“I’m leaving.”
“Jensen!” I was in disbelief. “What are you doing?”
“What does it sound like I’m doing?” he asked, as if it weren’t obvious. “I’m leaving you. Saying goodbye forever. I’m going to take care of myself.” He moved in front of the window. The light from the moon shone down on the house, allowing me to see Jensen’s figure.
“What?” My tongue, my lips, my voice almost went numb. None of this made sense.
“It’s like I’m speaking a different language here.” Although I could barely make him out in between the patches of darkness, I witnessed him rolling his eyes. “
Goodbye, Avalon
,” he said, waving his hand like a pendulum in a clock and turned to walk away.
“Wait!” I shouted after him. “So what are you saying?” I couldn’t form the words on my tongue. I walked over to him. “You can’t tell me you don’t love me,” I trembled, eyes watering and heart pounding so loud I could barely hear the sobs coming from within me. My weak arms shook against my body as I looked into the eyes of the man I adored - would die for - loved more than life itself. “Please,” I begged, “don’t tell me it’s true.” I couldn’t go through this kind of pain again. Not a second time.
My entire self had become immobile in response to his demeanor. His face - so beautiful and young - full of passion and life, seemed different. He looked lost and angry, showing no sign of remorse or denial as he said the four words I couldn’t bear hearing - “I don’t love you.”
“You-you don’t love me?” I couldn’t believe it -
wouldn’t
believe it. He’d told me over and over again how much he loved me, cared for me, needed me. Now all of a sudden he was going to change his mind?
“Did I stutter?” he spat, tone vicious. He stood as still as stone. His jaw line was harsh; dark circles lay under his eyes. His features were different - brooding and prominent; a stance Jensen never portrayed before. Just then, it hit me.