His Robot Girlfriend (5 page)

When they returned home, Mike was exhausted
and took a nap. When he got up, he took a long hot shower. By the
time he returned down stairs, dressed, Patience had set the dining
room table for him. The Caesar salad, lightly breaded orange
roughy, and garlic new potatoes were all perfect. For desert, she
made a satin chocolate tart. Mike had eaten many good meals, but he
had to admit he was impressed. He didn’t think he had ever had
anything that good outside of a cruise ship or a fine restaurant.
When he said so, Patience smiled sweetly. Afterwards, Mike watched
vueTee, while Patience cleaned up the dinner dishes.

Mike thought he would be too tired for sex
that night, but the exercise actually added to his vigor. He felt
as though he performed like a twenty year old. When he commented as
much, Patience agreed with him, though this ended up irking him, as
the more he thought about it, the more he was sure that it wasn’t
true.

“
Are you going to get up
and do housework all night?” he asked her as she lay next to
him.

“
What would you like me to
do?”

“
Why don’t you spend the
night with me? I know you don’t need to sleep, but I think it would
be great.”

Patience smiled at him. “Alright.”

Mike woke up several times during the night
though. He wasn’t used to sleeping with someone else in his bed and
the center part of Patience’s body was warmer than he expected. She
was also always awake, as Mike had known she would be, and since
she didn’t need to be there and it wasn’t all that comfortable for
him, the whole thing just seemed a waste.

“
You can go ahead and get
up if you want to,” he said, at last.

“
Thank you, Mike. I would
like to begin cleaning the garage.”

Thursday and Friday were exam days at school.
That meant that for the students both days were half days of
strenuous testing, with free afternoons to recover. For the
teachers, the mornings were a scramble to get fourth quarter grades
completed, and the afternoons were a scramble to grade tests, all
the while attempting to get the classroom stowed for the coming
summer months. In the evenings, after a work out at the health
club, Mike would enjoy delicious dinners and relaxing evenings of
watching movies on vueTee. On Saturday morning, Mike woke with the
realization that not only did he not have to return to work that
day, but that the school year was essentially over. Only Monday
remained to finish make-up exams, clean up the classroom, and sign
out for the year.

Climbing into his recliner, Mike went through
Friday’s mail as he watched cooking shows on vueTee. There were a
couple of bills and a handful of ad flyers. At the bottom of the
stack was a white envelope that felt abnormally thick. He opened it
up to find a matching set of Visa cards—one in his name and one
with the name Patience D. Smith.

“
Patience!”

She came in through the kitchen from the
garage. She was covered in dust and dirt, but was otherwise
completely naked. As she smiled at him from the doorway, he felt
himself aroused.

“
How come you’re
nude?”

“
I didn’t want to get my
clothes dirty while I worked.”

“
Okay. How come we have new
credit cards?”

“
I thought we might need
them, at least in the short term. It is going to be a few weeks
before I can earn some extra money, and I don’t want to spend all
your savings.”

“
You’re creating more
questions than you’re answering,” he said. “How are you planning to
make money?”

“
I’m selling a great many
things on eBay. Then I will take that money and invest
it.”

“
I know I have a lot of
junk around here. Just make sure you don’t sell anything I want to
keep. I know you should have more clothes.”

“
The money is not for my
clothes,” said Patience. “It is for yours.”

“
Clothes for
me?”

“
Yes.”

“
Hmm. Yes, I suppose that
is a good idea. I don’t want to look like such an old fart if I
have such a beautiful, hot young woman on my arm. Why don’t we go
ahead and do some shopping at the mall today?”

Patience beamed.

“
So what is this name?” He
held up the Visa card. “You’re not my wife. You’re just my… well, I
guess you’re my girlfriend.”

Patience leaped across the room and jumped
into Mike’s lap. She planted her full lips on his and kissed him,
then pulled back and smiled.

“
I’m your
girlfriend?”

“
Sure.”

She kissed him again. This was all the
motivation that he needed. He pushed her up out of his lap, stood
up, and then took her by the hand. He led her upstairs to the
bedroom, where they spent the next half-hour, though Patience would
not get on the bed until she had washed the dirt and dust off of
her synthetic skin. Afterwards, Mike got up and went to the
bathroom. Just as he was washing his hands, he heard his phone ring
on the nightstand, and Patience answering it.

“
Hello.”

Her eyes flashed at Mike as he reentered the
room and she said. “Yes, Mike is here. May I ask who is calling?
This is his girlfriend.”

She stopped and listened for a moment. Then
she said. “Just a moment,” and handed the receiver to him.

“
It’s Lucas,” she
said.

Mike grabbed the phone. “How is my son the
general?”

“
Don’t start all that,”
said the voice at the other end. “Tell me all about this
lady.”

“
Well…”

“
Tell me. I think it’s
great you’ve got a girlfriend, Dad. She sounds young.”

“
Umm. She’s a
Daffodil.”

“
A what? A robot?
Huh.”

“
What do you mean
‘huh’?”

“
I don’t know. She didn’t
sound like a robot.”

“
She doesn’t look like one
either,” said Mike. “I keep forgetting that she is one.”

“
Well, I guess it’s all
good,” said Lucas. “Everybody’s getting one. I’m just glad you have
someone to take care of you. Can I tell Harriet?”

“
No! I don’t know what
she’s going to say about it. I’ll tell her when she gets back from
her trip.”

“
Alright Dad. Take care of
yourself. I love you.”

Mike hung up the phone. “He’s calling Harriet
right now.”

“
Which bedroom belonged to
Lucas?” asked Patience, in the car on the way to the
mall.

“
The one on the northwest
corner. Since we’ve been exercising, I’m thinking that we could
make it into an exercise room. The room on the northeast corner, on
the other side of the stairway was Harriet’s. I don’t know what I’m
going to do with it. I wanted to turn the south bedroom into a
study. I keep thinking I might sit down and write a book about all
the goofy things the kids at school do. So far though, it’s just
become a trap for all the crap in the house—kind of like the
garage.

It was an hour drive to the mall, because the
closest good one was in the nearby city of Pico Mundo. Patience
spent the entire drive holding onto Mike’s arm with both hands, and
pressing her face onto his shoulder. At the mall, the two entered
by the food court. Mike bought a smoothie, and they began to
circumnavigate the mall, stopping at each clothing store to see
what was available for either of them. Mike let Patience make all
the style decisions.

“
I would like to get my
ears pierced,” said Patience, as they stopped in front of a jewelry
store.

“
Are you sure that you want
to?” wondered Mike. “Your holes won’t grow closed if you change
your mind, will they?”

“
No. But would you like it
if I had my ears pierced?”

“
Yes, I think I
would.”

When they went into the store however, they
were turned out.

“
Humans only,” said the
woman behind the counter. This made Patience pout, which in turn,
made Mike smile.

They had quite a load of shopping bags, by
the time they made their final stop at the lingerie store. Mike sat
down and waited while Patience gathered her selections and then
stepped back into the changing booth. She stepped out again and
again to show off tiny lacy bras, thongs, and some very hot little
lacy things called tangas, as well as garter belt ensembles. With
her perfect body, her chiseled features, and bright eyes, Mike
thought she put to shame the giant photos of the models wearing the
same things plastered across the wall of the shop. By the time that
she was done, a sizable audience of men, some ignoring the women
that they had come in with, were gathered around to watch.

Mike decided that it was time to head home.
Gathering all of the items that Patience had tried on, he sat them
next to the register and, when the clerk had finished ringing
everything, he paid for them. Both smiling, they made their way out
of the mall and into the parking lot. The sun was going down. They
had spent the entire day shopping, and had spent almost four
thousand dollars.

“
I don’t think I’ve ever
spent that much on clothes in a year, let alone a single day,” said
Mike.

They reached the car and opened the trunk to
put away all of their packages. Then Mike heard a voice behind
him.

“
Give us the packages and
your wallet.”

Mike dropped the shopping bags and spun
around. Two men, both in their early twenties stood there. One was
white, the other Hispanic. They both had shaved heads and they both
carried butterfly knives.

“
Maybe we’ll have some fun
with your little girl, too,” said the closest one.

Mike snapped into action. He dived at the
punk who had spoken last. Mike hit him square in the chest, and
they both went down onto the pavement. As they did so, Mike felt
the knife blade penetrate his stomach. The punk hit his head hard
on the pavement, but he still managed to push Mike off of him. He
was already on his feet while Mike was still rolling around on the
parking lot.

Just as Mike was finally regaining his feet,
he saw Patience planting some kind of karate kick to his
assailant’s neck. The other thug was leaning against a nearby car.
It was obvious from the way he was holding himself, that she had
already dealt him some heavy blows. She was about to hit the second
one again when she saw the blood streaming down Mike’s shirt. With
a small squeal she rushed toward him. When she did, the two
would-be robbers took off between the cars as fast as they
could.

“
That’s right!” yelled
Mike. “Run, you pussies!”

“
Mike!” gasped Patience.
“You’re bleeding!”

“
It’s nothing,” said Mike,
his eyes starting to roll up into his head. “But I think I’m going
to pass out.”

Mike felt Patience guiding him to the ground,
so that he wouldn’t bash his head on the pavement.

“
Thanks,” he said, as
darkness spread across his world. “That’s my girl.”

* * * * *

“
That’s my
girl.”

“
Yes Daddy, I’m
here.”

He opened his eyes and looked up into the
concerned face of his daughter Harriet. He was on his back in a
hospital room. An I.V. was attached to the back of his right hand.
He reached up with his left hand and felt the bandages that covered
the left side of his stomach.

“
When did you get back?”
Mike asked.

“
I got home late
yesterday,” said Harriet. “Right about the time you decided to take
on a couple of desperados. The police said they haven’t caught them
yet, by the way, though the officer left his card in case you
remembered something when you woke up.”

“
Call him,” said Mike. “I
recognize both of those guys. Carlos Fernandez and Nathan Spencer.
They were in my class seven or eight years ago. I think Nathan’s
mother still lives down the block from me.”

“
Nathan Spencer!” said
Harriet, whipping out her phone, and stepping toward the door. “I
dated his brother! Officer Darling please…”

As Harriet stepped out the door, the doctor
stepped in to check on Mike. He informed him that he had been
operated on the night before-- a relatively small amount of damage,
all things considering. The knife had only nicked his descending
colon. Had Mike not been overweight and possessed of a fairly large
amount of belly fat, the knife could easily have caused much more
damage, perhaps even death.

“
Well, at least there is
one consolation to being fat,” said Mike.

“
On the other hand, I’ve
seen knife blades turned by a well-toned abdomen,” said the doctor.
“And of course there are other benefits to being in good
shape.”

“
Fine, fine,” said
Mike.

The doctor left and Harriet returned.

“
They’re going to get those
little bastards.”

“
They weren’t so little,”
said Mike. “How did you know I was here, anyway?”

“
Your girlfriend called
me.”

“
Girlfriend?”

“
Yes, your girlfriend,”
said Harriet. “You do remember her? Patience? Or do you have
amnesia.”

“
Oh, I remember her. I just
didn’t realize you knew about her yet.”

“
I heard about her
yesterday. From my little brother,” assured Harriet. “I was happy
to meet her though. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a Daffodil before,
let alone talked with one. She’s not like other robots I’ve
seen.”