Holding Out For Skye (26 page)

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

“It’s really coming down, isn’t it?” Tyler’s voice sounded from behind her.

Skye turned from her perch on the window seat to stare at Tasha and Tyler, who were standing at her bedroom doorway. It was the next day and it was raining again. It had all the makings of a thunderstorm. Skye could see the flashes of lightning and hear the rumble of thunder in the distance.

The gloomy weather suited her mood perfectly.

Still in her blue pajamas, she had a dark-blue blanket wrapped around her to keep the slight chill away. She’d woken up to the dreary day and mostly whiled away the morning staring at Mother Nature’s spectacle.

Last night Skye had gone to bed early, praying that sleep would provide her with at least a few hours of oblivion but not holding out much hope for it. Surprisingly enough, she’d fallen asleep. She must have been both emotionally and physically drained. Or maybe it had been the rain. The sound of falling rain had always soothed her.

Kiera had stayed over and was around in the apartment somewhere.

“Can we come in?” Tyler’s eyes were filled with concern.

Skye nodded. Kiera must have called them. Tyler reached her in three long strides and wrapped his strong arms around her in comfort. She let herself rely on his strength for awhile.

“Hey kiddo, how are you doing?” he inquired softly as he pulled back.

“I’m okay.”

“That’s good.” Worry filled him when she lifted her lips mechanically in what passed for a smile. He took a seat on the bed.

Tasha sat down on the window seat, facing her. Skye watched her warily. Was this going to be like the Thea episode all over again? She knew that Tasha considered Cian a close friend.

As if reading her thoughts, Tasha said, “Kiera told me about Thea.”

“Oh.” Skye tightened her fingers around her blanket, bracing herself for more painful words. Kiera had erased the tape from the answering machine last night and unplugged the phone.

“Thea was completely out of line saying all those things to you,” Tasha pronounced angrily.

Skye blinked at her in astonishment. “Wh—what?”

“You know, it’s insulting that you’d think I’d react the same way. If you weren’t already so down, I’d box your ears for it.”

“Thanks… I think.”

“You should be,” Tasha retorted.

“But… why?” Skye asked, still baffled.

“Why I’m not ripping one into you over breaking up with Cian?”

Skye nodded cautiously, eyes still wary.

“Because I figure you have your reasons for doing it. Both of you are special to me and I know neither one of you would want me to choose sides over this. So I’ll just be here for you guys whatever either one of you need.” Tasha gave her a hug. “And Skye, no matter what, I’ll always be your friend.”

Skye’s eyes filled with tears at her words. “I don’t know what to say except that I’m so lucky to have a friend like you.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m the bestest.”

“Hey, what about me, Skywalker?” Tyler protested.

Skye gave him a smile. “You’re the bestest, too.” She turned back to Tasha. “Tasha, I’m so glad Ty met you. You’re the best thing that ever happened to him.”

“You’re stealing all my lines, you know,” Tyler teased.

The girls ignored him.

“He’s the best thing that ever happened to me too,” Tasha said, a look of contentment in her eyes.

“Jesus, can we stop with the mushy stuff now, please?” Tyler gave a groan, hoping to make Skye smile at him again.

Tasha rolled her eyes at him. “So, Skye, how about we settle in for some games and pizza today?”

“Guys, I appreciate you being here for me, but I can’t do this now. Not yet. I need time to just be. To just, I don’t know,
adjust
.” Skye stared at her blanketed hands.

Ty started to object but Tasha gave a small shake of her head.

“Okay, sweetie. Give us a call if you need anything.” Tasha hugged her again then stood up.

“Yeah, use that blue contraption you carry around in your pocket all the time that you call a phone,” Tyler retorted as he hugged her too.

“Very funny, Ty.”

It pleased him to see Skye roll her eyes at him. Her pallor still worried him though.

“Call us,” Ty ordered her.

Skye heard them talking to Kiera before they left. It had taken all of her control to keep her emotions in check and hide her pain from her friends. It was exhausting to act as if there wasn’t a hole inside of her.

She saw Kiera’s reflection on the glass of the window as she came up behind her.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m okay,” Skye told her reflection.

“Skye, you know you can’t stay cooped up like this.”

“I just need time. To think. To get my energy back.” Skye rested her head against the glass. “I feel so depleted.”

“Is that a ploy to get out of helping me clean the house? Because I can tell you it’s highly effective.”

A ghost of a smile touched Skye’s lips. “Should have thought of that as an excuse.”

“Oh, hon.” Kiera squeezed her in a one-armed hug. “I get it, Skye. What do you need from me?”

“I just… I need some time… by myself.”

“Are you sure you’ll be okay all by yourself?”

Skye could hear the worry in her voice. “I’m sure. And I know all I need to do is call you and you’ll be here.”

“You better.” Kiera straightened up. “There’s leftover food in the fridge. Try to eat some okay?” Though she had a feeling the food would just stay frozen. “Everything will be okay, sweetie. I’ll lock the door after me.”

“Thanks, Kiera.” Skye watched as with one last hug, Kiera left. The moment the apartment door closed behind her, she turned back to the window.

Skye stared at her reflection on the glass. It seemed apt to see the rain washing through it, washing her life away. She only wished it could wash away the excruciating pain as well.

CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

Life went on even when your world was crashing down around you.

Skye wished she could stay at home forever but even though the thought of seeing Cian almost broke her down, she couldn’t miss work.

So day after day, off to work she went. Their office was hushed nowadays, the silence almost deafening. No more arguments escalating between her and Cian, no more amused bouts of laughter from Nick and Thea.

Cian was almost eerily quiet now. They spoke from time to time yes, politely so, when it concerned their work. True to the promise they’d made to Marina, they didn’t let their personal feelings affect their work. Because of that promise, Skye couldn’t even request a change of teams.

Thea was barely civil to her, her voice as cold as ice whenever she couldn’t find a way to get out of talking to her. The rest of the time, she satisfied herself with giving her the cold shoulder.

Skye got the message loud and clear. That friendship was officially over. Thea’s apparent dislike for her burned like acid.

Nick didn’t seem to blame or hate her for that matter, god knew why. He treated her as he normally would, for which she was utterly grateful. He refused to let Thea stop him from speaking to her. He was unbearingly gentle with Skye; the sympathy in his eyes almost her undoing.

It hurt, god, it hurt
so bad
! It tore her heart to pieces all over again to see Cian every day, to be within touching distance of him and be unable to do so.

At least she could be grateful for small favors—she and Cian were no longer partners. To pick up the slack during Thea’s absence, Marina had absolved their partnership. Skye remembered laughing at how Cian had complained about not being able to get her ‘up close and personal’ anymore. But now she was glad for it. Being in the same office with him was already killing her, having to work so close with him would have annihilated her.

Marina knew they had broken up. She made no mention of it, though Skye could see the sympathy in her eyes. What she did do, was give them different clients which kept either Cian or Skye out of the office with her, so at no point in time were the two of them together in the office for long.

Skye could try to get another job but good ones were hard to come by. She’d been lucky to get the one she had.

The only thing she had any control over, the only thing she
could
do was limit the time she spent in the office when she wasn’t with Marina. The moment the clock struck twelve, she was out like a shot and didn’t get back until lunchtime was over. She mostly just hung out at the waterfront, staying in the deserted areas, more comfortable in her solitude.

By the time five o’clock rolled around, Skye got out of the office like an inmate who’d been let out of prison. Since officers had the choice to either keep late hours or bring their work home, she preferred the latter.

These days when she got home, Skye buried herself in work to the point of exhaustion. When she finally turned in for the night, it was only to lie there in bed, staring at the ceiling. She couldn’t drum up the energy to do anything but lie there like a corpse, unable to sleep.

So, she stuck the earphones of her iPod in her ears and turned the music on loud, drowning out her morbid thoughts until she finally fell asleep.

Skye knew she was falling apart at the seams but she couldn’t seem to do anything about it. At least her inner breakdown wasn’t visible on the outside.

She knew that her friends were worried about her, but she couldn’t talk about this. She couldn’t seem to care about anything. But she tried. Oh, how she tried to get over her pain. It was so hard. Her eyes were dry and yet her tears seemed to drown her inside.

Skye understood now how a person could die of heartache. She would never have wished it on anyone. So, in the end, she did the only thing she could do to survive.

She locked it all away.

Her love for Cian, the pain over breaking up with him. She shut it all away and wrapped the shattered pieces of her heart with ice, encased
herself
in ice, not letting anything in or out.

Skye blocked it all away, keeping herself busy.

She buried the sexy blue shoes Cian had bought for her to the back of her closet. She hadn’t worn them even once yet but she couldn’t bear to look at them. Not without thinking of him.

Her friends didn’t ask her any questions or urge her to talk about Cian. They let her be but didn’t leave her alone. They seemed to understand that she needed to keep her mind occupied, that it was the only way she
could
cope. So they went out of their way to help her stay busy, giving her the comfort of knowing they were there for her, for whatever she needed.

She let Ash drag her off sometimes to spend her lunch hour with him, checking out DVDs. He made sure she ate something. She no longer had any enthusiasm for anything but she did her best to hang on even when she could feel her feet sinking in quicksand. She let herself be carted off to shopping trips with Kiera and Tasha, pretending to be fine but she knew her I’m-back-to-normal attitude didn’t fool them one bit.

Ty came over as often as they did and they hung out playing video games. He didn’t talk much other than swearing at the screen when the game didn’t go as he wished it to, which used to make her burst out laughing all the time. Now, the normalcy of it comforted Skye. He gave her the solace of his company, not demanding any questions and letting her be.

Crystal tried her best to help her by calling her often to make Skye listen to her even if she couldn’t open up to the painful feelings inside of her. Kiera had told her what had happened. She made her smile by relating the latest antics of her eight-year-old son, Dylan and how she and her husband had their hands full with him.

Skye would eternally be grateful for their unshakable support. They didn’t give up on her and it was their love that gave her the strength to keep going.

One day she was at the waterfront on one of her lunch escapades, sitting on a bench staring at the sea when Alastor found her there.

“Well, well, look who we have here,” he said gleefully when he saw her.

Skye inwardly groaned at the sight of him. “What are you doing here, Alastor?”

“It’s a public place, isn’t it?”

“What do you want?”

“I heard you dumped Cian. So how about we have a little fun together?”

Skye understood his meaning clearly. Just the thought of it made her want to puke. She knew exactly what his ulterior motive was, to hurt Cian. As if she’d let that happen.

“When hell freezes over.” Skye let him see the utter disgust on her face at which his turned mean. She stood up to leave but he grabbed her arm, stopping her. “I suggest you remove your hand right now,” she ordered in a frigid voice.

“Think you’re too good for me. You don’t have Cian to protect you today.”

“I can protect myself just fine.” Proving it, she slammed the heel of her palm upwards, connecting with his chin. His head snapped back. He swore in pain as he stumbled and let go of her arm.

“Bitch,” he hissed and tried to grab her again.

Skye pulled back her arm and decked him. She missed his nose and hit his cheek instead. He swore again. She managed to get in a punch to his stomach and he doubled over. Maybe she should have cut her losses and ran away at that point but she felt reckless, throwing caution to the wind and exulted in the satisfaction of hitting him, of letting out some of her frustration over her break-up with Cian.

She’d known the self-defence classes would come in handy one day. If Alastor thought she was easy pickings, he had another think coming.

He tried to get hold of her arm again but this time, she let him pull her into the move. Using his momentum, Skye caught his arm and flipped him on his back. He landed with an ‘
oomph!
’

By this time, people had gathered around them.

“What’s going on here?” a man called out.

“Miss, do you need help?” someone else said.

“Looks like the missy’s got it under control,” another man said. “Want me to call the cops, missy?”

Skye blew out her breath and turned to the man. “No. But thank you.” If Cian found out about Alastor trying to get his hands on her, who knew what he would do?

“I hear Thea and Nick are back together,” Alastor taunted.

Skye’s eyes widened as she understood what he was insinuating. “It was you? You told Thea’s father about them? You freaking bastard!” She reared her foot back to kick him, then stopped. He just wanted the satisfaction of knowing he’d gotten to her.

“You stay the hell away from them and from me and Cian,” she snapped at him.

As she walked away, Skye became aware she was shaking. Reaction was setting in. Of all the
stupid
things to do! It could have easily gone the wrong way for her, she could have been hurt. She’d been very lucky to have gotten off unscathed.

Skye thought of Cian as she always eventually ended up doing and wondered how she’d managed to have one more thing to hide from him. Good thing she was wearing long sleeves today. It would cover the swelling of her knuckles.