Holier Than Thou (The Tome of Bill) (39 page)

“I’ll take that under advisement.”

“Do so. Alas, I cannot see to it myself at this time.”

“Oh yeah, you had mentioned something about departing,” I said offhandedly, the sarcasm zooming way over her diminutive head.

“Yes. I must leave for home. The Alma have made their first strike against my forces. It was repelled easily enough, but I do not doubt they were simply testing us. I wish to be there to ensure they are laid low like the dogs they are. The rest of my people are securing transport even as I speak.”

“How’d they fare?”

A look of irritation passed through Gan’s face for just a moment. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t take some amusement from it. “One of the Magi, perhaps two, escaped. There is no sign of them. My assassins are well aware of my
displeasure
at such.”

Well that was just fucking great. “Shit really is starting to pile up.”

“Crude, but apt. Indeed it is. Do not fret, though. I shall return when it is time for my beloved to fulfill his destiny.” She took my silence as cue to go on. In reality, it was because I was confused. “I had thought that the eve of his glorious fate was upon us. I have since come to the conclusion that he needs further maturing. His destiny is still yet to come.”

She stopped as her eyes focused on something leaning against the wall behind my desk. I knew exactly what she was looking at.

Without invitation, she walked around me. Gingerly she reached out toward it, but then pulled her hand back without touching it.

“The Icon’s sword?”

I nodded. “I figured it would raise too many questions if the cops found it. Besides, it’s an antique. Seemed a shame to leave it behind.”

“I am surprised you could touch it.”

“I can’t, at least not without my hands blistering to all hell. Fortunately, Remington didn’t need his trench coat where he was going. It made for an excellent oven mitt.”

“Interesting,” she said, strolling to the front of my desk, a thoughtful look upon her face. “She will no doubt want it back when the time comes to face my beloved in their final conflict.”

I guess she had missed that part earlier about the Icon buying the farm. “I hate to burst your bubble, but you might want to consider that the whole prophesy was nothing but bullshit.”

“Why?”

“Wasn’t it foretold that Bill would kill the Icon, or the Icon kill him. Well it didn’t happen.”

“I know. That is obviously still to come.”

“Newsflash, sweetheart - since you missed the show - but the Icon is dead.”

“No, she is not.”

“Yeah, she is. I was there. She took a fifty-caliber slug to the face. You don’t get up from that.”

To both my surprise and undying irritation, Gan actually started to giggle. It quickly turned into a full-on chortle. I looked to her companion for some clue, but he just stood there silent and stoic. Lot of fucking help he was.

“Oh, I thank you,” she said after a few moments. “I have not laughed like that in some time.”

“Am I missing something here?”

“Indeed, child. Tell me, was your weapon consecrated in the sacrament of the Black Tngri?”

Black what? My only reply was a blank stare, not understanding a word of her gibberish.

“My apologies. It is known in the West as the Ritual of Baal.”

Yeah, like that helped at all. “Never heard of it,” I replied, reaching up to twirl an errant strand of hair that had fallen out of place.

“That is not surprising. Very few of our kind have. Even during the days when Freewills and Icons waged war openly on the battlegrounds, it was a secret known only to a handful. Still, I would have thought the other vampires would have come prepared with sanctified weaponry. Odd they did not.”

“I’m not following.”

“To put it simply, if it were so easy to kill the Shining Ones, they would not be considered the great threats they are. We would have merely launched volleys of arrows at them from afar and been done with it.”

My mouth dropped open. She couldn’t be right. Wouldn’t James have known about this? I could understand Colin being in the dark, but I found it unlikely one of the Draculas wouldn’t know. What the hell was going on?

“To that end, I shall leave Monkhbat here when I depart.”

“Huh?” I muttered, entirely distracted by her revelation. The phrase
holy shit
didn’t begin to do it justice.

“I
said
I shall be leaving Monkhbat behind.”

What? “Not even gonna try hiding that you’re spying on us, are you?”

“No,” she replied smugly. “He shall remain here as my eyes, but I do not leave him as a burden to you. He shall be entirely at your disposal. Use him as you will to help rebuild your coven.”

“And he’ll be reporting in to you at every step of the way?”

“Of course.”

I considered this. It irked me, but perhaps the devil you know is better than the one you don’t. Before then, we hadn’t even been aware she was keeping an eye on us. Now at least...

“Entirely at my disposal?”

“Yes. He shall serve you loyally. Albeit take care...”

“Let me guess, don’t cross the line or he’ll turn on us?”

“No,” she replied, looking slightly offended. “I simply wished to convey that you should keep your commands simple. His English is not so good.”

“Oh.”

She turned to leave. “Farewell, Sally. We shall meet again.”

Sally? What happened to whore? “Wait a second. You said you stopped by to see me, not Bill.”

“Ah yes,” she replied, addressing me over her shoulder. “I had almost forgotten. I wished to convey to you my respect. You have proven yourself far more capable in this endeavor than I had foreseen.”

“Thanks...I guess.”

“Dr. Death has chosen well for his second. He could do far worse. I am comfortable leaving, knowing he has you to guide him.”

I was nearly stunned. That was the closest the little witch had ever come to being remotely civil with me.

“I’ll do my best,” I replied, finding myself at a loss for a wittier comeback.

“I know you shall,” she replied before once more turning to leave. “There is just one more thing.”

“Yes?”

“Have a care, whore. Bill is still mine. Should I perceive that your intentions for him are anything more than the physical services you provide, I shall kill you without a moment’s hesitation.”

With that, she walked out.

Motherfucking little bitch!

* * *

I finally put down the phone. Several hours had passed since I had ordered Starlight to get me the numbers of every morgue in the city. Gan’s warning had completely freaked me the fuck out.

After Bill had run off, the rest of us had gotten off the roof ASAP before the authorities could arrive. I hadn’t even given consideration to Sheila’s survival. Hell, I had seen Remington plug her at close range with a silver bullet. Something like that would have put down a vampire of even James’s power. It was nearly inconceivable that someone could take that and live.

Now, having made call after call, I was forced to reconsider. No one even remotely resembling her appearance had been delivered to any of the bone houses I had contacted.

* * *

Two hours later, my questions were at least partially answered. After sending Monkhbat out on a bullshit errand to get him out of my hair, I had turned on the police scanner. Turns out an ambulance had gone missing shortly after our battle ended. It had just been found parked in an alley in northern Manhattan, the driver unconscious. There had been nobody else on the scene. Nothing had been stolen except for the driver’s coat.  The address the ambulance had been en route from when it disappeared: the office.

My feelings were decisively mixed. On the one hand, I was sort of glad. She gave Bill hope and I didn’t want to see that die. The flip side of that, though, was she was also a distraction for him, a dangerous thing in these times. Her survival had been Bill’s -
our
- goal. Everything we’d gone through over the past few days hadn’t been for naught after all, but it also meant all of those fucking prophesies were still in play. Fate wasn’t finished with us. That was perhaps the most frightening thought of all.

Then there was that ritual Gan had mentioned. Had James purposely kept Colin in the dark, letting him send those vamps on what was surely a suicide mission? In that I had more questions than answers.

Either way you looked at it, things were just beginning. I stepped to the window and surveyed the darkness beyond. The weather had let up a little, but I wasn’t fooled. If anything, this was the calm before the real storm.

“Bill, where are you?” I said to myself more than anyone.

“Any sign of him yet?” a voice asked from behind me, Starlight.

“No, but he’ll be back.”

“How can you be sure?”

“He always comes back,” I said with more certainty than I felt, the burden of leadership finally beginning to weigh on my shoulders. “The dopey little fuck is full of surprises.”

She was silent for a moment, but then asked, “So what do we do now?”

I smiled. That part at least was easy. Freewill or not, this coven wasn’t rudderless. Not to toot my own horn, but I could keep the fires burning until he got back. “We do what we need to. We rebuild and recruit.”

“I thought we weren’t supposed to...”

“There’re bad things coming, Star, and I want this coven up to full strength again. I don’t know what’s out there, but I don’t want us caught with our pants down again.” A small grin tugged at my lips as I said that. It was something that Bill would have had an assholish reply to. Amazingly enough, I actually missed the sound of his voice.

“And then what?”

“And then we hold tight for the Freewill to return.”

“To lead us into battle?” she asked, repeating the oft-said prophesy.

“Maybe,” I replied, keeping my true feelings on the subject to myself.

“But what if he doesn’t?”

“He will,” I said, silently adding
I hope
to that. A thought then hit me. With it came a smile and even a little chuckle at the irony of it all.

“What’s so funny?”

“Bill will be back and maybe things will even turn out okay in the end.” I turned and put a hand on Starlight’s shoulder. “We just need to have a little...faith.”

THE END

Bill Ryder
might
return in:

Goddamned Freaky Monsters
(The Tome of Bill, part 5)

Can’t wait for more Bill? Follow his ongoing misadventures on Facebook at

http://www.facebook.com/BilltheVampire

About the Author

Rick Gualtieri lives alone in central New Jersey with only his wife, three kids, and countless pets to both keep him company and constantly plot against him. When he’s not busy monkey-clicking words, he can typically be found jealously guarding his collection of vintage Transformers from all who would seek to defile them.

Defilers beware!

Rick Gualtieri is also the author of:

Bill the Vampire
(The Tome of Bill, Part 1)

Scary Dead Things
(The Tome of Bill, Part 2)

The Mourning Woods
(The Tome of Bill, Part 3)

Bigfoot Hunters

The Poptart Manifesto

To contact Rick (with either undying praise or rude comments) please visit

http://www.poptartmanifesto.com

Bonus Chapter

Devil Hunters

A Tale of the Crypto Hunter

The golden eagle soared effortlessly above the frozen landscape - its wings barely moving - held aloft by the updraft that preceded the storm front. A clap of thunder sounded in the distance, but the mighty bird paid it no mind. It was preoccupied, as was its norm, with the search for prey.

Something on the ground caught its sharp eyes and it banked its impressive six-foot wingspan to investigate. It moved with the easy grace of a super predator, sure in the mastery of its domain. Soon it spotted what had caught its attention: a fresh kill. Perhaps wolves or even a bear had brought down the great antlered beast below. It did not matter to the eagle. It had few qualms with facing down either opponent over meat. It knew it had little to fear from even the largest of terrestrial predators.

In the fading sunlight, the storm’s approach quickened. The great bird began to circle, slowing descending towards the appetizing prize awaiting.

Movement suddenly registered in its sharp vision from down below. A flash of pale yellow appeared and then it saw something step from the brush surrounding the kill. Like many predators, the eagle did not outright fear a lone human; however, its instincts commanded it to be wary of the two-legged things. It continued circling, waiting to see if the intruder would move off. That was when something else caught its eye.

The eagle had no fear of any creature that walked the land. What came from the sky, though, was a different matter. Though it knew instantly that the newcomer was still far above it, the shadow it cast on the ground below dwarfed its own.

Bringing its wings to bear, it made a sharp turn. The prize on the ground wasn’t worth it. The creature that had entered the eagle’s airspace was an enemy against which it knew it could not win. With one last shriek, the eagle headed west, hoping to try its luck elsewhere.

* * *

“What the hell are you doing?” came the voice from the Bluetooth headset.

“My job,” Danni Kent replied, stepping out from the hunting blind and approaching the dead moose that lay before her.

“That’s why we set the bait.”

“Give me a break, Derek,” she said. “This thing’s already taken two kids from that village and it’s started going after the adults too. It’s a man-eater and you know it. The bait isn’t going to attract anything more than the normal scavengers.” Danni, rolled her eyes. It had been nearly a year since she had joined the team and he
still
acted like she was some kid he needed to be over-protective of.