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Chapter Twenty-Nine

Josh

I rubbed my eyes then blinked against the tiredness dragging at me. I hadn’t stopped driving since leaving downtown LA. Glancing at the clock on my dashboard, I quickly worked out that I was six hours down and had about fifteen to go. There was no way I could pull a second all-nighter. I had to stop for some rest.

I hated that idea.

I was worried that stopping would bring it all back home, make me feel stuff I didn’t want to accept.

Would I ever be able to forget that look on Rachel’s face when she told me to
just go
?

It cut worse than anything. At least when my dad and Aunt Lindy died they weren’t leaving me by choice. I hadn’t asked them to be taken from me. If bombs and cancer hadn’t been involved, they would still have been there.

Rachel had the chance to come back…and she didn’t take it.

I gripped the wheel, wanting to yank the damn thing off.

Why! Why didn’t she want me!

Flicking on the radio, I turned up the volume then rolled down my window. I wanted to get one more hour under my belt before finding a place to rest. The music and air would keep me awake for that much longer. It was a dangerous way to play, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t stop yet. Not yet.

A woeful song about heartache was playing. I rushed to change it and was pleased to hear Jack Ingram singing “Love You.” Perfect. That was exactly what I needed to hear right then…a song that basically told my woman where she could stick it.

The anger spiking through me felt good. I pressed down a little harder on the gas, wanting to put as much distance between Rachel and me as possible. She could have her damn club and demeaning career if that was what she wanted.

I drove on, into the darkness, trying to convince myself that I was better off without her…trying to pretend I didn’t notice how skinny she’d gotten while she’d been away and the slightly hollow look in her eyes.

I gave her an out and she hadn’t taken it. That wasn’t my problem.

Turning up the volume, I blasted the final chorus, fighting myself the entire way. Part of me felt justified for thinking like that, while another part of me wanted to yank on the wheel and drive back, throw Rachel over my shoulder, and bring her home where she belonged.

But she didn’t want me to, so I gripped the steering wheel a little tighter and kept moving forward.

Chapter Thirty

Rachel

It was a bumpy, painful ride in the back of that truck. I had no idea where I was going or how long it would take, so I closed my eyes and clenched my jaw. I hugged my knees like they were my favorite teddy bear and fought tears the entire trip.

What was I going to do when the truck stopped?

Would the man haul me to the police station? Who would I say to come get me?

I couldn’t call Josh. I’d seen his face as he tore me to shreds with his bitter words. I couldn’t call Uncle Amos either. I was too ashamed to admit what I’d done. That only left Parker or Aren, and I definitely couldn’t call them.

I’d messed up so bad. There was no out.

The truck slowed, I assumed for traffic lights. It’d been stopping and starting a lot as it traveled through the city, but then a high-pitched beep sounded and the truck shifted backwards. We were stopping.

I tensed, fear injecting my muscles with renewed vigor. Still crouched behind the drawers, I awkwardly shifted to my toes and waited. The breaths pumping out of my nose sounded noisy as the beeping stopped and the air in the truck went still. The cab door opened then slammed shut. The man started talking, and I assumed he was on his phone. I couldn’t make out what he was saying, but he was moving to the back of the truck.

Should I just shoulder him out of the way as I dashed past?

What was the better move? Attack first, or hide in the shadows?

The latch on the door clicked and the metal screeched as the door shot up. I held my breath, squishing myself against the wall.

“Not a problem, ma’am. I’ll bring that up for you right now.” He hung up on the call. “Geez, a piece of work all right,” he muttered to himself, shifting the coffee table and walking further into the truck. He was going to turn around and spot me at any moment. What the hell was I going to do then?

I gripped the edge of the dresser, ready to launch myself at him if he turned, but he didn’t.

He snatched a bubble-wrapped piece of artwork and tucked it under his arm, turning for the door without glancing my way. My body shook with relief as he jumped down from the truck. A new voice started speaking, a lady this time. Her staccato words and demanding tone told me she was the piece of work the guy had been referring to.

With my breath on hold, I eased out of my spot and inched toward the truck door. They were still chatting, but when I glanced out, they were moving into the house. I took my chance. Jumping down from the truck, I landed with a hiss. My feet were scraped raw from running barefoot, and they weren’t appreciating the impact of the hard road.

Bracing myself against the truck, I limped away from discovery, breaking into an awkward run once I no longer had the truck to rely on.

I didn’t know where I was. There was a hint of salt in the air that I couldn’t figure out. Nipping to the right, I stumbled along, not sure where to go or what to do. Buildings loomed on either side of me, and I was transported back to the first night I ran away…that feeling of utter desolation as I second-guessed my every move. All I’d had was my guitar, a small bag of clothes, and a pitiful wad of cash.

I didn’t even have those things now.

I’d never felt so vulnerable.

My body throbbed, my face swollen and aching. It was hard to see out of my left eye. It’d puffed up during the truck ride. I gingerly fingered it when I stopped to catch my breath against a brick wall. In spite of the fact it was summer, the air had a cool nip to it. I was wearing next to nothing, and when the breeze tickled my naked skin, goosebumps rippled over me.

I had to find shelter.

I had to think like I used to.

Closing my eyes, I forced my brain to focus.

Maybe sheltering behind a dumpster in an alley would be enough to get me through the night. I couldn’t think about the morning. I just had to survive the darkness.

Sucking in a shaky breath, I eased off the brick wall and limped a little further down the street. A road was ahead, the whine and buzz of traffic shooting past. Maybe I could hitch a ride somewhere.

The thought made me pick up my pace until another, scarier thought stopped me.

Whoever picked me up would see my face, my torn clothing. They’d no doubt figure I was beaten, possibly raped, and force me to a hospital. The police would be called in. They’d ask questions.

Most normal people would probably think that was a good thing.

But it was no normal situation. Aren was the kind of man who could lie his way out of assault charges. He had the charm of a prince. The police would give me straight back to that asshole, and I didn’t even want to think about what he’d do to me once I was in his clutches again.

I spun away from the road, darting right and discovering a narrow alley. There was no dumpster in it, but I walked down it just the same. Music played from the building on my left, wafting into the air and dancing softly around me. The building on my right was silent, dark…empty. Trailing my fingers along the wall, I finally came to an old wooden door. The handle was a little rickety when I tried it. To my despair, the door was locked. I tried the handle again, desperation making me stupid. Tears shook my belly as I rattled the knob, begging it to open. It didn’t, so I had to walk away. Stumbling down the alley, I figured I might as well get as far from the street as possible and huddle in the corner for the night.

That’s when I saw the window.

It was small, but so was I.

Frantically running my hands around the edge of the frame, I saw no easy way to open it…unless I smashed the glass. I couldn’t exactly crack my elbow through that thing, so I dropped to my knees and searched the area for anything to help me. I got lucky and snatched a fist-sized rock off the ground. With a grunt, I threw it at the window, guilt spiking through me as the glass smashed. I didn’t wait to see if any lights came on behind me. I didn’t want to deal with shouting voices and questions. Instead I launched myself through the narrow space, slicing my shin on a jagged piece of glass. I ignored the sting, hauling myself through and falling to the floor. Blood dripped onto the concrete. I wiped my leg with my finger. The slice wasn’t too deep but would still bleed a little. I needed to find something to stop the flow.

Clutching the wooden shelving beside me, I groped my way off the floor and hobbled across the room. I’d landed in some kind of junk area. It was piled high with rejected furniture and boxes that smelled like they’d been sealed for years. It was hard to find my way in the dim light, and I stubbed my toe a couple of times but eventually found the door.

I discovered a bathroom across the hall and wiped myself up with some paper towels. I didn’t want to turn any lights on and give myself away. Probably a good thing. I was guessing my reflection was an ugly one. I wasn’t ready to come face to face with it.

Backing out of the bathroom, I crept down the corridor, took a couple of turns and eased out a side door that led me into a cute little theater. It looked old but smelled freshly painted, like someone was trying to revive it to its former glory. Running my hand along the edge of the stage, I supported myself around the curved structure, trying to find a good place to hunker down for the night. Everything felt too open and exposed, so I ended up dragging myself back to the junk room.

Exhaustion tugged at my shaking limbs and I fell to the floor, shuffling back against the wall and using my bent arm as a pillow. In spite of my weariness, I doubted sleep would find me quickly. A cool breeze wafted through the shattered window, so I eased myself out of its draft and closed my eyes.

That was when I picked up the faint tune from above me. It was coming from the apartment across the alley, sounding way louder than it should have and piercing my very soul.

Tears eased out of my eyes as I listened to the words of a song I’d heard a few times before—“Best I Ever Had.” It was impossible not to think of Josh then. His beautiful, Thor-like face, so strong and in command. I’d broken it. His bitter words couldn’t hide the pain radiating out of his eyes. He’d never look at me the same again. He wouldn’t be able to forgive me.

I’d left him to turn myself into something I hated. I’d always thought there was something better for me, but there wasn’t. Josh
was
the best, and I’d walked away from it.

And now I’d left Aren, and Josh was going to pay for that, too.

I wanted to crawl back so bad and beg Josh to forgive me. He said he always would, but why should he?

I couldn’t.

Chapter Thirty-One

Rachel

My head pounded in my sleep, making me dream nightmares throughout the dark hours. As the sun lit the edges of the room, I finally dropped into a dead slumber. I don’t know how long I slept for, but a soft whistling pulled me from the darkness, slowly rousing me…but not fast enough.

The door flew open, along with my eyes.

The whistling was cut short, replaced with an expletive. “Bloody kids,” a man muttered in an accent I ain’t never heard before.

He stepped further into the room and my time was up.

His eyes hit me, rounding with shock as I scrambled up against the wall and pressed my back into it.

Breaths were spurting out of me, fear-induced ones that sounded loud in the room.

“Whoa, okay.” The man raised his arms, his gaze softening as he took me in. “I’m not going to hurt you, all right?”

I nodded, swallowing quickly. My eyes darted to the broken window as I calculated whether I could make it through without the guy catching me. I had no idea what kind of man he was or what he’d try doing to me. He had a rugged, unshaven look about him. He was wearing board shorts and a worn-out T-shirt, a pair of flip-flops on his tanned feet. I didn’t know what to make of him, although there was a kindness in his eyes when he smiled at me.

“Don’t worry about the window. We can replace that.”

I frowned at him. Why wasn’t he yelling at me?

“I’m Leo. I run this theater, and you need help.” He pointed at me.

I shook my head, sucking in a sharp breath and flinching when my tender back scraped on the rough, concrete wall.

“Are you running from someone dangerous?”

My lips trembled and I tried to shake my head again, but it didn’t really work. Tears built in my eyes, blurring my view of the nice man.

He crouched down in front of me, gently touching my knee. I jerked and shuffled away, knocking into a shelf that started to waver and tip.

“Whoa.” He jumped up and steadied it before it could tumble on top of us. “You’re like a skittish rabbit. I’m not going hurt you. I promise.”

I wrapped my arms around my knees and pulled them against my chest. The movement made me wince, my throbbing body feeling the effects of my previous night.

“It’s okay.” Leo crouched down again but didn’t reach out for me. “Let me take you to the hospital.”

“No,” I gasped. “I can’t… He can’t find me.”

Leo’s head drooped. “Aw, shit, you really are in trouble, aren’t ya?”

I slashed at my tears, my vision clearing in time to see him run a hand through his hair and blow out a slow breath.

“So, I’m guessing the police are out of the question, too, then, huh?”

“He’ll lie,” I croaked. “He’ll make me go back.”

“Is he, ah, your…” Leo ran his thumbnail over his bottom lip. “Your pimp?”

“I ain’t a whore,” I snapped. But my fervor quickly faded, and I admitted in a broken whisper, “But he wants me to be…and I can’t do that. He hired me to sing and dance, nothing more.”

“Okay.” Leo nodded. “Okay, well, I still think you should go to the police. He’s obviously beaten you pretty badly. You need to get patched up.”

“I’m not going.” I struggled to my feet and made a move for the window, despair creeping through me as I thought about climbing the shelves.

“Wait, don’t go. Let me help you.”

A spike of old fear charged through me. I’d had that offer before. Nice boys putting on a show and then expecting me to do things for them…to them. I scowled at him, shaking my head and gripping the edge of the shelving. No, there was only one man I trusted on this earth and he lived in Payton.

“Leo! Where are you?” A female voice made me jerk.

My head snapped toward the man and he lifted his hand again, calling over his shoulder, “In the storeroom, foxy.”

That’s when I noticed his wedding ring. That shouldn’t have necessarily made me feel safer—married men could be assholes, too—but it was the way he said the word ‘foxy’ that got to me. There was a soft affection in his tone that froze me to that shelf.

“Da-da!” a little voice squealed.

Leo’s face lit with a grin. I understood why the second a chubby baby with golden curls and bright blue eyes toddled into the room. “Hey, cherry blossom.” He lifted her high before kissing her cheek and nestling her against his side.

“So, I’ve only got an hour before Angel’s due at playgroup. What do you want to—” A gorgeous blonde stepped into the room, her words disappearing when she saw me. “Oh my gosh.”

“Day-dee boo boo.” The little girl pointed at my face.

Her mother gave me a shaky smile before gently taking her daughter’s hand. “That’s right, cupcake, she’s got a boo-boo. Should we put a Band-Aid on it?”

The little girl nodded, looking very solemn.

My eyes welled with tears again. “I should just go. You shouldn’t have to—”

“No, it’s okay. Let’s, um, get you cleaned up.” She stepped toward me, stretching out her arm like a mother hen, ready to gather me to her side. Her sweet expression reminded me of Mama, in spite of the fact this woman looked to be around my age. I had to resist the urge to crumple against her and start howling like a newborn.

I let go of the shelf and turned to face the little family.

“I’m Jody.” She smiled.

“Rachel.” I choked out my name and sucked in a shaky breath.

“Well, our apartment is only a few blocks away. I can take you there and…get you some clothes, and some painkillers.”

“Dan ban-ai,” the little girl piped up.

Jody giggled. “That’s right, Angel, and a Band-Aid.” She winked at me then took my hand and gently guided me out of the room.

“I’ll keep Angel with me.” Leo trailed us out of the room.

“Good idea.” Jody looked at him. “Don’t worry about playgroup. Let’s just skip that today. I’ll come back and get her soon.”

“No, don’t worry about it. We’ll do some cleaning and be home in time for lunch. Isn’t that right?” He bounced his daughter in his arms. She giggled, an infectious sound that had me grinning until a pain tore through my lip and I was forced to put my bland face on.

Leo started humming then broke into a gusty rendition of “Do You Love Me,” starting with the line about working. He danced to the stage, wiggling his hips and making the girl cackle with laughter again. It was the sweetest sound I’d ever heard.

Jody squeezed my hand with a chuckle and pulled me up the main aisle of the theater.

I followed her out to the car, unable to speak as I slid into the passenger side. It was impossible not to wince. Jody gave me a sympathetic smile as she started her car.

“So, what got you so knocked around?” Her eyes stayed on the road, and I was grateful for it. I didn’t want anyone looking at me. I hadn’t seen a mirror, but I was a mess. It was taking every ounce of willpower not to fall apart on the spot.

I couldn’t find any words, so I ended up shrugging. Tears were clogging my airways anyway. I sniffed and gazed out the window, flicking my hair over my shoulder to hide my face from the passing pedestrians.

“I know you probably don’t want to talk about it. I’m just trying to figure out if I’m putting my family in danger by helping you.”

“No.” I spun to face her. “I won’t stay. I just need some clothes and maybe a little money, and I’ll be gone. I swear, I’d never do anything to hurt you or your precious family. You three are like…you’re beautiful.”

“Thank you.” She beamed. “I never thought I could possibly get this lucky.”

“How long you been married?”

“About three weeks.” She chuckled at my surprised expression. “We just went to a local courthouse and did it quietly, but we’re going to Australia for Christmas so I can meet Leo’s family, and we’ll have a proper celebration then.”

Australia. So that’s why he talked so funny.

Jody’s lips were still playing with a smile. “It’s weird. I always thought I’d want a big wedding with the white poofy dress, but when you meet the right guy, you’d be willing to get married in a sack, you know what I mean?”

I did. I mean I think I did.

I’d never been that romantic about marriage. My daddy was an awful husband to Mama, and I didn’t know why anyone in their right mind would choose to enter into a binding agreement like that. I cringed.

You mean like you and that contract?
I berated myself.

A fresh wave of tears stung my eyes. I blinked and sniffed, trying to deny them.

“You must feel like total shit,” Jody murmured.

A pitiful laugh shook my belly, and I rested my head back against the seat. “Yeah, I really do.”

Jody patted my knee. “I know you’re not ready to talk about it, but everything’s going to be okay.”

“No, it’s not,” I whispered. “I chased the wrong dream, and now I’m going to lose it all.”

The car slowed to a stop outside an old brick building. Jody walked me inside, a pained expression on her face as we rode the elevator to the top floor. She let me into her house, and I followed her through to the bathroom where she turned on the shower and placed a towel on the vanity.

“Throw those rags out the door, and I’ll bring some fresh clothes in for you.” She laid her hand on my shoulder. “Once you’re clean, I’ll patch you up, and you’re going to tell me everything.”

The command was a strong one, but it was said in such a nice, soft voice that I wanted to do it. I wanted to spill my guts to the woman, because there was something about the look in her eye that told me she’d get it.