Honored Vow (15 page)

Logan nodded.

“That’s very interesting.”

“I thought so.”

“Did anyone happen to mention to him that Mikhail’s straight?”

Logan tipped his head, and I watched my sylvan reach out and curl a long piece of hair around Danny’s right ear. He then squeezed his shoulder and smiled. And when you got the real deal from reticent, aloof Mikhail Gorgerin, when you were gifted with a sparkle in the shining midnight-blue eyes and saw the wicked curling lip along with the arch of the dark-brown eyebrows… you were good and gobsmacked. The man glowed, and Danny nearly swooned as Mikhail brushed by him. I watched for a minute before I checked to see what Crane was doing.

He was smiling at everyone, and then he turned funny and winced.

“You okay?” I held my breath.

“I’m fine,” he sighed, stepping around Delphine to walk over to me. Without thinking about it, he rubbed his chin over my shoulder before he sat down at the table with a huge plate of eggs and steak and biscuits. “Is anyone gonna talk to me?”

They descended on him like locusts: Delphine and Markel and Yuri and Koren. When Mikhail sat down, he took a seat on Crane’s right and put a hand on his forearm as they spoke. The closeness soothed Crane; the sylvan touching him was good. They were friends, and I had no idea when they had become close. Koren stepped up behind him, hands on his shoulders, and Crane patted his hand as Delphine put a large glass of juice down in front of him and Markel followed with a steaming mug of coffee. Taj came in last, having been outside checking the grounds as was his routine.

His eyes lit up when he saw Crane. He pulled the beanie off his head, walked over to Crane, and put it on him, rolling it up so it fit, so all you saw was my best friend’s bruised face, not where the thick wavy mane used to be.

“Thanks, man.” He smiled up at one of the members of the Shu cats, the deadliest panthers in the world, those that reported directly to the priest of Chae Rophon.

Taj patted his back, and I realized that in a very short time we, the household of the semel-netjer, had mauled the distance out of him. He was no longer standoffish, no longer cold and quiet; he was a part of our tribe. I doubted that he would want to return to Egypt even if he were called.

Logan cleared his throat softly, so only I would turn and look at him.

“He can’t scent-mark you, I won’t allow it.”

He had noticed Crane scraping his chin over my shoulder.

“I’m his, too, Logan, we—”

“No.” He cut me off, kissing my forehead. “When cats catch your scent, after yours, they should only smell me.”

I watched as he slid his cheek over the same shoulder that Crane had marked. “Don’t pee on me, alright?”

He chuckled as he turned to leave the room.

My hand on his bicep stopped him.

“You gave me a task,” he reminded me.

“I wanna sit down with you and talk about the sepat. We have to make plans and strategies, and we have to start training and—”

“Love,” he said, smiling at me, hands sliding up my arms to rest on my shoulders, “you need to focus all your energy on Crane, because as your beset, he must accompany you. In two months you’re going to have to decide if it’s going to be him or if you’ll appoint another.”

I nodded quickly.

“Along with Domin, he’s going to be in the pit with you during the trial of the heart.”

“I know.”

“Come here.”

He slowly turned me around and walked me out of the kitchen and into the living room, where there was a fire blazing away, warming the large polished wood and leather furniture-filled space. When it had been his mother and father’s home, apparently the house had looked much different, but now there was a strong masculine feel to every part of Logan Church’s home. I loved that the man’s presence could be felt throughout the mansion.

“Look at me.”

Tipping my head back, I met the man’s amber-colored eyes.

“We’re all learning this as we go, Jin. I can’t remember even hearing of a sepat being called, can you?”

“No.”

“See, so, Ammon’s father was never challenged, or his grandfather, but now he is, and the priest is giving me these rules that are supposed to be finite but make no sense at all.”

He looked worried, and I put my hands on his chest, resting them there, to comfort him.

“I mean, there’s a law that no reah may ever fight in the pit, and yet the law of Bast, which you yourself have called, allows a mate to take the place of their semel during a challenge. And now the priest tells me that having a nekhene cat in the pit would be an unfair advantage, so he may need to blindfold you or—it’s a mess. And the sheseru is supposed to do the trial of the blood, but the law also states that no sheseru who is protector of a true mate will be placed in the path of danger. So that means Yuri can’t stand as my champion for the trial of blood, but—”

“You’re going in circles.”

“Yes, I am,” he sighed heavily. “It’s—I mean, sometimes I understand Russ’s old argument with me, because some of the rules are completely antiquated and barbaric, and someone does need to update them, and—”

“Did you ever think maybe that’s why all this?”

“What are you talking about?”

I shrugged. “Logan, maybe it’s you. Maybe you’re the man who’s supposed to bring the panthers that have been lost back into the fold by accepting that a semel could take, even as a yareah, a male for his mate.”

He squinted at me.

“Maybe you’re supposed to do that.”

“Jin—”

“And maybe panthers who love people, regular human people—maybe they should be allowed to do that without fear of reprisal.”

“What’re you—”

“I’ve traveled all over the country, and I’ve met a lot of panthers who have left their tribes, run from them for one reason or another, but the one thing they all have in common is how much they miss being a part of a community. Panthers need other panthers, and maybe this is what you’re supposed to do.”

“Jin, honey, there’s no way that—”

“Maybe you’ll be the semel-aten who appoints a council to rewrite the law, making it, finally, understandable for everyone.”

“But I’m not anyone special.”

“You are, though, Logan; you have gifts that others don’t.”

“Oh yeah?” He leered at me. “I have gifts, do I?”

“Knock it off,” I snapped at him. “You’re the strongest panther I know, and I don’t mean physically, Logan, I mean your heart.”

The look I was getting was all love.

“You could be semel-aten.”

“I never wanted to be anything but yours.”

“I know.”

“I just want to be the semel who found his heart, Jin, that’s all. Just semel-re.”

I shook my head. “You’re supposed to be more.”

“Love, I am not the—”

“How do you know?” I cut him off, taking his face in my hands, staring into his gorgeous amber eyes. “Really, Logan? How do you know? The laws are ancient, they need changing, and who’s to say that you’re not the man to do it?”

He stared at me. “Do you realize what you’re talking about? You’re talking about me being semel-aten. Me. Do you have any idea what that means?”

“I think so, yeah. It means that you rule Sobek and the people who live there, and that you’re in charge of relationships with every tribe in the world, and that you and the priest of Chae Rophon are best buddies for life. You would be a king.”

“Which I don’t want to be.”

I smiled up at him. “Which is probably why it should be you.”

He took a deep breath and grabbed me, holding me tight. “Whatever happens, as long as we’re still us, I’ll be okay.”

I hugged him back, laying my head over his heart. “We’ll always be us.”

“But you can’t get tired; you never get to say that this isn’t what you signed on for, because right this second, you’re promising to stand by me, as my mate, forever.”

“I already did that,” I groaned, shoving away from him. “For crissakes, Logan, it’s you and me until one of us is done here and the other follows. I don’t plan on being here without you.”

He nodded fast. “Me neither; I’m not strong enough.”

I stared up into his eyes, and he held my gaze without wavering. Always, I saw the love there, always his granite resolve, the strength and his will. But there was also that piece no one else saw, his absolute, drowning need. Blessed with finding the other half of his soul, he could not be expected to live without me.

I was the same.

It was the only scary part about finding your true-mate: the inability to live without them. Others who weren’t semels or reahs could never be expected to understand.

“Okay, so.” I took a breath. “What? When do we have to know about Crane?”

He reached for me, and I took a step back just beyond the tips of his fingers.

“Come here.”

I shook my head, smiling, retreating behind the couch.

“What are you doing? I’m not gonna chase you around the living room.”

But he lunged at me, making his words a lie, and I moved away just as fast. His expression was priceless.

“What?”

“I don’t know,” I teased him, putting more space between us. “I’m just trying to talk to you; you’re the one that’s all touchy-feely after you said you weren’t gonna be.”

He scowled at me, crossing the room so there was only a loveseat between us.

“Tell me, who’s going to Mongolia to be with you?”

“You.” He went to grab me, but I was faster, looking for it, walking backward and hitting the wall between two windows.

“And?”

He came around the piece of furniture, stalking me, ready to bolt any way I did.

“Yuri.”

“And?”

“Mikhail and Domin.”

“Who else?”

My mate closed in on me, and I noticed that his eyes had heated, changed to a beautiful warm gold, just that trace of a hunt firing his blood. The man so wanted to run me down and make me submit. Just the idea of it, I knew, flushed heat through his blood.

“Stay there.”

“Why? You so want me to take off just so you can catch me.”

I saw the muscles in his neck cord, saw his jaw clench.

“You’re kinda twisted there, Church.”

His brows furrowed.

“What?” I asked him.

“I want something, but it has to be okay with you, and I don’t want you to say yes unless it’s really okay.”

“What is that?” I waited for him to explain.

He stepped in front of me, and his hand went to my throat, closed, and his thumb slid under my chin, tipping it up as he bent toward me, his breath feather-light across my face. “I want you to take my name.”

My eyes flicked to his.

“You can’t wear a ring because of how fast you shift and––”

“No panther can wear a ring, Logan; everyone shifts too fast to remember to take it off.”

“I’m talking about you right now.”

I was silent.

“You already bear my mark, but it’s not enough. I want everyone to know, not just werepanthers, that you belong to me, with me. It’s important.”

I could see that it was from the look on his face. “You want me to be Jin Church?”

“Yes, very much.”

Our eyes locked as he waited.

“I need to think about that.”

He nodded.

“Is that okay?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” I smiled up at him.

He made a sound in the back of his throat.

“What’s wrong?”

“When you see me again, I’ll be this wild creature that you’ll have to tame. Eight weeks in panther form will take its toll.”

“I know,” I told him, pressing forward, my hands sliding up under the lightweight cashmere sweater to touch hot skin and rippling muscles. The man was so beautiful, utterly edible, and I was ready to make a feast of him.

“It’s part of it, part of the trial of the heart—the mate taming the semel.”

“Yes.”

“If you can’t even do that, then you—”

“We both know I can do that,” I told him, lifting my eyes slowly to meet his. “Logan.”

“I don’t want to hurt you. The priest says that in the history there are accounts of semels ripping the throats out of their mates in their werepanther forms before being ordered to shift back to panther form, never being semels again, never knowing they slaughtered them, nev—”

I chuckled. “Ripping their throats out, really?”

“Jin, this is—”

“Stop, you know I can tame you, Logan Church. In whatever form you are, you’re mine.”

“But we’re not even allowed to shift back into men until after the trial of the heart is concluded. So when you’re done with your trial, I get to be me for a day before I meet the semel-aten in the pit. We go from panthers to our werepanther form. I won’t even be able to talk to you. They lock us up at night and—”

“It’s okay.”

“And if Yuri fails, or Mikhail, or you, then I never get to talk to you as a man ever again!”

“Logan—”

“Jin, if the semel kills his mate, he is immediately ordered back into panther form and never allowed to shift back again,” he said, his voice strained and cracking. “You spend your life as an animal that dreams of being a man.”

“Kiss me.”

“Jin.” His voice cracked on my name.

“Please.”

He exhaled sharply before he bent and kissed me.

There was the press of his lips, his mouth melting over mine, slow, sensual, utterly claiming, and so hot. I trembled in his arms, lifted mine, wrapping them around his neck to hold him tight and close. I wanted my mate. The desire to strip away all his clothes, have him naked and heaving in bed, both of us slick with sweat and come, was almost overwhelming.

He whimpered in the back of his throat.

“I love you,” I told him, easing back for a moment before I reclaimed his mouth.

The kiss was endless, and breathing became a secondary consideration.

“Your scent, Jin… you’re gonna make me forget all my plans today.”

It was what I wanted but not what was best for my mate. He would be leaving soon, and he needed to make sure that everything was set before he left. For his own peace of mind, I had to let him go.

“It’s gonna be soon.”

“What is?”

“They’re coming for me and Domin at the end of the week.”

I reached up for his face, and he closed his magnificent eyes as he gently shivered under my touch. “That’s okay, everything’s okay.”