Hope Over Fear (Over #1) (34 page)

Will stands and shakes my hand as he laughs good-naturedly. “Please excuse my cousin. He makes it sound like I’m in ladykiller training.”

Will resembles a slightly younger version of Cain—so much so, they could pass for brothers. Cain reaches up to squeeze Will’s shoulder affectionately, and it’s obvious they have a close relationship.

“Well, he is the Cowboy Casanova. But I’d be careful about taking any advice from him, Will. You may end up with a black eye and bruised nuts,” Marlo says as she shoots Cain a smirk.

“Pipe down, princess. My satchel has, and always will, remain intact.”

“Satchel? Really? That’s what you call the jewels? That doesn’t sound very manly. It reminds me of a shriveled up leather bag—”

“Good evening, folks, and welcome to open mic night! We’re going to jump right in and get started, if y’all don’t mind. We’ll start the night with a little jazz ensemble. Please welcome Vanishing Nova!” The announcer exits the stage, and three men walk out carrying a trumpet, a saxophone, and a tuba.

“Just in the nick of time, if you ask me,” Alex mutters under her breath. I laugh and shake my head in agreement. Cain and Marlo have a knack for taking a conversation straight to the gutter.

Several other performers take the stage before Adam, and I feel my anticipation building. Being here, and waiting to hear him play, feels reminiscent of our first date, but with a depth and intensity that only time and intimacy can create.

When the announcer introduces Adam, everything seems to fall away. I only see him while everything else becomes white noise. He sits on a stool and gently strums his guitar, looking up at the audience with a devastating smile.

“Hey everybody, I want to thank y’all for coming out tonight. I hope y’all enjoy what I’ve got planned. Let’s start with a little Gavin DeGraw.”

Adam’s voice provides my soul the solace it so desperately needs. Whether he’s talking, singing, or whispering quietly in my ear, he calms and excites me in equal measure. He affects me in a way no one else ever has. And tonight is no different. The rasp of his voice is seductive, and his fingers expertly strumming the chords of his guitar is spellbinding.

Applause signals the end of his first song, although it feels as if he started playing only moments ago. He moves into his next song without introduction, and I recognize the tune after only a few notes. That particular American Authors song is burned into my brain along with the memories that are tied to it. My eyes dart to his, and his mischievous smirk tells me everything I need to know. Cain’s right—Lily and Gage have been talking about me. I return Adam’s knowing smile, and my heart warms at the thought; there might be a place for me in his family.

“Shit,” Alex’s hushed whisper wipes the smile off my face, and I follow her gaze. Mason and Natalie stand in the entryway of the patio as they survey the crowd. Mason’s eyes meet mine, and he breaks out into a smile and waves energetically. I return his smile and wave back. He leans in and whispers something in Natalie’s ear. She gives him a nod of recognition and finds me in the crowd. She gives me a genuine smile, and in that moment, my sins don’t feel quite so heavy.

I feel no jealousy. I feel no sadness. All I feel is pure, unadulterated happiness for them and hopefulness for me.

Mason and Natalie make their way to Melody’s table, and I turn to Alex and give her a reassuring nod. “It’s okay. Really. It’s great to see Mason. Nothing but good thoughts, okay?”

Before Alex can respond, Adam wraps up the song, and the crowd bursts into raucous applause. All my attention returns to him, and Mason quickly becomes a fleeting thought.

“I have one more song for y’all. It’s from one of my favorite bands, Green River Ordinance. The song is called “Endlessly.” Sara, this is for you, love.” Adam begins gently strumming his guitar while meeting my slack-jawed stare with fierce intensity.

As he tells of an all-consuming love, of undying affection, and of never-ending patience, I’m overwhelmed with emotion. All external sounds disappear, and I’m left with just the two of us. He stops my heart. He floods my senses. His loves surrounds and protects me. His song heals me one note at a time.

One minute. One hour. One day. I’m not sure how much time passes before his song comes to an end. I shoot up out of my chair with every intention of pummeling Adam right on the stage when someone or something blocks my path.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now? Your manipulation really knows no bounds. Weren’t you just cozying up to that paramedic last week? You make me fucking sick.” Melody’s poisonous words jolt me back to reality, and I look down to see her wicked eyes dancing with satisfaction.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Melody, so get out of the way and leave me the fuck alone,” I whisper calmly, trying to stay in control of my anger.

“Nobody rattled your cage, you little twit, so keep on walking!” Marlo shouts as she points a cheese stick at Melody.

“Really, Marlo? Do you think your ass can stand another cheese stick? The seams of your jeans are screaming for mercy,” Melody spouts viciously.

“Hold on there, girl. Nobody makes fun of Marlo but me, ya got me? And besides, your ass could use a cheese stick or ten. Take it from me; no man likes to fuck a bag of bones. Jeez, are you starving to death?” Cain stands to his full height, giving Melody an irritated glare.

“Guys, I have this, really. Just let me handle it,” I say, although it’s obviously falling on deaf ears.

“If everyone needs to make me the villain here, what-the-fuck-ever. But I am beyond tired of watching this train wreck barrel through every man in Providence. She’s acid … poison.” Melody’s voice is loud enough to gain the attention of surrounding tables, and embarrassment floods through me.

“I’m sorry, is there a problem here?” Adam somehow snuck up behind me and has decided to join in on this hot mess. I close my eyes and pray for everything to just wash away.

“Dude, I’m about to save you a world of hurt, and you can thank me later.” Melody points her finger at me and exacts her gaze back to Adam. “You need to run, and when I say run, I mean as fast as you fucking can, from this girl. She’s toxic; save yourself the heartache. Believe me, I know what—”

“Enough! That’s quite enough, Melody,” Natalie interrupts with Mason standing behind her. You’ve got to be kidding me right now. I’m waiting for Jesus himself to show up and weigh in on this argument.

“Natalie, this doesn’t concern you,” Melody hisses.

“That’s where you are dead wrong. The person this doesn’t concern is you. Everyone has moved on but you, Melody, and I’ve had enough of it. Mason? He’s happy. Me? I’m happy. Sara appears to be happy, too, along with her friend here,” Natalie explains, pointing to Adam. “The only person who’s unhappy is you. So why don’t you go take care of that, and leave Sara the hell alone!”

I can’t stand here and listen to my life splayed out for the world to see any longer. It’s getting hard to breathe, like I’m suffocating under the pressure.

“Please excuse me,” I whisper as I grab my purse and beeline for the bathroom, skirting tables and chairs as quickly as I can. I need a minute to myself.

I splash water on my face and stare at my reflection in the mirror. What the hell just happened out there? One minute, I’m ready to run into Adam’s arms and never let him go, and the next I’m playing referee between Melody, Marlo, Cain, and Natalie. And Natalie taking my side? That was definitely a shock … but I can’t deny it felt good.

I turn when I hear the bathroom door swing open, and Natalie stands at the entrance with a sympathetic look.

“Are you okay?” she asks.

“Sure, I’ll be fine. Thanks for taking up for me back there. I’m not sure why you did it, but … well, just thanks. I don’t know why Melody can’t let this go and leave me alone, but it’s gotten really old, ya know?”

Natalie crosses her arms and lifts an eyebrow. “Well, I may be able to shed a little light on that. You’re obviously not aware of this, but Melody has been in love with Jared since college. From what I understand, she’s still carrying a torch for him.”

“Wow, that’s
never
gonna happen,” I mutter under my breath. I can’t believe she has been spewing her hatred at me for a year over a man she will never have. You’ve got to be kidding me.

“You can say that again. Unless she magically grows a penis …” Natalie smirks and shoots me a knowing look.

“Wait, you know?”

“That’s Jared’s gay? Yeah, I know. I went to Tulane with his cousin, Mary. A big group of us stayed at Jared’s apartment in Dallas a few times for bachelorette parties and things like that over the years. He didn’t announce it or anything, but he didn’t put forth much effort to hide it. Small world, right?”

Realization sweeps through me. Now it makes sense that Natalie would take up for me when she saw Melody attacking me. She knows it’s all a lie. She knows I didn’t betray Mason like everyone thinks.

“Wow,” I say, with widened eyes and my head cocked to the side. “Wait, hold on a minute. Does Mason know … I mean, does he—”

“No, Sara, he doesn’t. I didn’t think it was my place to tell him. But I understand if you want to, and I have no problem with it.” Natalie is quiet for a moment, and then she reaches out and squeezes my hand. “I know it’s been hard for you, and I want to thank you for letting him go. You know, I love him with all of my heart …”

“That’s what he deserves,” I say quickly, my eyes filling with tears. “That’s all I ever wanted for him.”

“I know it is—”

The ringing of my phone interrupts Natalie, and I reach into my purse to identify the caller. Abby. She’s full term now, and we’ve been waiting for labor to start.

“I’m sorry Natalie, I have to take this.”

She nods in approval, and I answer the phone.

“Abby, is everything okay?”

“Sara, thank God! No, I think my water broke, and I’m starting to have contractions. I went the bathroom to clean up, and there’s blood, Sara! A lot of blood. I don’t know what to do!” Abby sounds frantic and breathless.

“Okay, Abby, just try to calm down. Have you called an ambulance?” I speak as calmly as I can, hoping not to further upset her.

“Yes, right before I called you. I’m so scared, Sara,” Abby confesses, and her voice breaks into a sob.

“I’m leaving for the hospital right now, Abby. I’ll meet you and the paramedics at the entrance,” I say as I run out of the bathroom, offering Natalie an apologetic wave. “I need you to tell the paramedics exactly what you told me, okay?”

“Okay.” I hear Abby inhale a deep breath. “Okay, Sara.”

I rush out of The Courtyard without telling anyone where I’m going. All I can think about is getting to Abby. Everything that happened tonight? Gone. There’s no room for any of it right now.

I start my car and shoot out of the parking lot as quickly as I can, only offering a passing glance to the bar as I drive away. And as I do, I see Adam standing at the entrance, watching me drive away … again.

“When a Heart Breaks” by Ben Rector

I ARRIVE AT the hospital just as the ambulance pulls into the emergency entrance, and I run as fast as I can to get to Abby. James jumps out of the front just as Mike opens the back door. I’m so relieved to see familiar faces and anxious to get an update on Abby.

“James, thank God. How is she? The bleeding?” I ask frantically as I approach the back of the ambulance. The bleeding could be completely normal, but it could also be a symptom of placental abruption. I try to keep my thoughts in the present and not let it wander to dark places. Abby needs me to be the voice of reason, not a frantic mess.

As they unload the stretcher, Mike gives me a quick update. “It looks more like blood tinged amniotic fluid than hemorrhaging, Sara, but that’s just my opinion. Contractions are about five minutes apart, lasting a about a minute each with moderate intensity. We started an 18G IV in her right hand and have fluids running.” He continues to give me all her vitals and other stats.

“Sara, I’m so scared,” Abby cries as I follow the stretcher into the hospital. I grab her hand while I try to keep up with Mike and James as we fly down the hospital hallways.

“It’s okay, Abby, I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere, okay? Let’s get you to labor and delivery,” I say, trying my best to reassure her.