Hot Southern Mess (Hide Your Crazy) (32 page)

Chapter 32:  So that’s it, I’m leaving.

I spent the rest of the night silently crying into the hard pillows on the couch. The pride in me wouldn’t let myself walk back to his room to apologize. We both said some nasty things that couldn’t be taken back, and then, well, he confessed he was in it all for me.

So why couldn’t I just forget it all, gi
ve up the past, and move forward? We had both come completely clean with each other, so what was the issue now? Why did I let my past dictate the future? The possible future I could have shared with him.

The bus s
topped at Madison Square Garden, and I quickly scampered off. I didn’t want to see any of the guys this morning. My heart couldn’t take the words that would be spoken about last night, because I know they all heard it. The bus wasn’t soundproof, and both of us screaming at the top of our lungs basically made the entire conversation hearable.

I hurried to the crew bus and grabbed the remainder of my bags and Simon, and wandered back to PD’s old tour bus. Knocking on the door, I waited for someone to open it up.

“Eager to get going?” Brantley greeted me at the door.

“Just
want to make a good impression.” I shrugged, silently praying that the total devastation on my face was not too obvious.

“Come in;
I’ll get the guys up,” he offered, reaching out to take my bags.

Our hands brushed each other’s as I handed them over. Pains shot through my body, knowing damn well there was never any coming back from what happened with Reid earlier. Never again would I feel his touch, or hear his voice telling me good morning. Just when I thought life was finally turning around, that the karma gods had decided to stop punching me in the damn face, the epic blow out happened. My happy ending shattered right before me. I really needed to start believi
ng what I had claimed all along: some stories just don’t have happy endings after all.

We were back in Seattle, making great headway on the tour. Political Downfall was scheduled for a twenty –six stop tour that was departing in less than a week. Our first stop was Spokane, Washington; where we would pick up our opening act, Pleasure Revenge.

Things were falling
in place perfectly, except for my still breaking heart every damn time I thought about Reid. It didn’t help that I worked for a company where they were one of the biggest contracts. Reid’s face was all over that damn office, and each time I turned the radio on I swear his songs were stalking me. The pain didn’t lessen with each day that passed. I truly believed that he was the one for me, but he walked away because I was afraid to take a chance. Chances suck, but if I had to do it all over again, I would have gladly took that risk.

“Hey, do you have a tampon?” Megan came into my office and asked.

“Yeah, I think so………………” I replied, reaching for my purse under my desk. I pulled one out and handed it over.

“Thanks, I completely forg
ot to pick some up this morning.” She sighed.

“I’ve got a couple in here if you need it. My period hasn’t started ye…………………………………….t.”

Holy fuck me, I’ve haven’t had my period. My heart started racing while my breathing became erratic. How in the world did I not know that I hadn’t gotten my monthly visit yet? Shit, when was the last time I had one? I racked my brain trying to remember.

“You okay
, Molly?” Megan questioned, giving me a concerned look.

“Yeah, I just need to get a bite to eat,” I stumbled, quickly pushing myself away from my desk.

“I can get it if you want.”

“No, I need some air
, anyway. I’ll be back in an hour,” I mumbled, quickly dashing out the damn door to the elevator. This can’t be happening. I was always careful about not letting a man go bareback, that this had to be a fluke.

Shit, Reid.

Reid never wore a condom each time we got caught up in the moment.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit,” I grumbled while smashing my key card into the elevator reader. There was a corner store down the
block; I just needed to grab a test to ease my mind. Life had been too cruel lately, that this couldn’t happen. I couldn’t be pregnant with the man I was head over heels in love with that wanted nothing to do with me anymore.

I placed the test on the back of the toilet
and started chewing on my nails. I had sixty seconds till peace of mind was handed over. I overreacted sometimes, and this was just one of those instances. My heart thumped loudly in my chest, as I continued to sweat out the remaining few long agonizing moments of my life.

Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath and leaned over the toilet. Opening my eyes
, I let out a small gasp. “Really…………………….”

My phone beeped in my pocket.
I couldn’t stop my body from trembling as I pulled it out.

*I can’t tell you that it’s going to be easy. But I can tell you that I’m worth every fucking struggle tha
t we would go through. I’m sorry. I miss you. Call me please. Reid*

The En………..No,
wait. It’s just the beginning.

Watch out for:

“Cheap & Classy”

Book two of the

“Hide Your Crazy” series,

Coming Spring 2014.

About the Author

              T.A. Hardenbrook currently resides in Spokane Washington, with her husband and two young boys. She has a degree in Early Childhood Education, as well as her license in Cosmetology.

                Her days include being the family chauffer and referee, all while trying to become the perfect domestic goddess one strives for. Her family of four also includes a very loving American pit bull terrier, a corn snake, and several American Cavies (Which her oldest son shows at ARBA/ACBA events).

              Being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in 2013, life became a struggle and she found learning to adapt was not an easy task. Luckily with the help of daily medication, life is slowly returning back to normal. Having the opportunity to write a novel at that time was a huge boost of confidence in dealing with the disorder, being able to use her hands and type, was therapy for the soul.

Please remember to never let anything stand in front of your dreams.

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