How I Became Lotus Raine...the Porn Star (6 page)

The kiss broke and I smiled, giving him a little nod. I turned away and placed a shaky hand on the handle, fear of what lied on the other side taking over. He then placed his over mine, and whispered in my ear from behind. Goose bumps raised everywhere his breath touched, igniting my body all over again. My mind and body needed to get their shit together. My body had got hers and it was now time to leave.

“Follow me.” I stepped over, making way for him. He linked our hands together, then unlocked the door and flung it open. The thumping of the music filled the small space as we quickly stepped out. People were yelling, and I chanced a glance. No one was even paying attention to us. They were yelling at one another over the music. I let out a breath I hadn’t known I was holding.

He held my hand tightly up until we pushed through the front doors. The sudden chill of the air hitting me energized me, making me feel fully alive. In that moment, I didn’t regret that I had just come too close to sleeping with a stranger. I was rejoicing in it. I just wasn’t sure if it was because I refrained or because I had given in to an extent. I had expected the general experience to make me feel dirty, but it didn’t.

A hand wrapped around my waist, turning me into him, face to face. I hid my giddy smile I knew was creeping up. It made me feel like a total teenage girl. I shouldn’t have felt so silly about something so trivial, yet so liberating.

“Come back to my place,” he said as he grabbed my hands, lifting them to his lips and placing kisses on them.

I pulled my hands away. Just because I was feeling a new sense of freeness in that moment didn’t mean I wanted to expand on it. Or, even if I did, didn’t mean I should. I accomplished more than enough for the night, and I thought it’d be smarter if it ended there.

“I can’t.” I turned my head, needing to break away from his comforting gaze that’d eventually have me giving in.

“You can and you want to,” he pleaded a good case, I give him that.

I looked back up at him, needing to end it. “I enjoyed tonight. Really, I did.” I touched his face with the back of my hand and watched it move down his defined cheekbone. “What happened can’t happen again. Thank you for the candy and the…experience.” I rubbed my thumb across his bottom lip, remembering what it felt like between mine. I quickly turned around and waved down the first cab I saw before my strength dissolved and I left with him instead.

“SO, EVEN THOUGH you actually enjoyed the short time you had with him, you ran away instead of seeing where else it could go?” Shepard asks and I just nod. “Why is that? Were you not interested in any type of relationship? Have you had bad luck in the past? Tell me to shut up if you don’t want to answer these questions. I’m just trying to figure out why a woman as gorgeous as you wasn’t taken already.” He pries but in a non-evasive way.

I take my time thinking about his questions as I rub my hands along the arms of the chair. The fabric is a rough paisley material. Not soft and suede like you’d find in the other offices around here—the ones these chairs actually get used in.

“I’ve had past relationships. The typical high school and then later on college boyfriends. They ended on mutual terms as each of our lives were going different directions. I was more into school and my future than the party scene or being up their asses all the time. Even after I moved here, I dated a couple different guys. But having a boyfriend was never a top priority. Neither was sex. That’s why I had never been into just going around screwing random strangers. I was happy and somewhat content with how my life was going. If anything were going to be changed, it would have only been the assignments I wasn’t receiving while working here. I never expected one guy to come into my life out of nowhere and whip everything I thought I was and wanted into a beautiful mess.”

“So, how’d you feel after that experience? Did it change you in anyway? Did you guys exchange names or any sort of contact information?” He scribbles some more on his paper.

“I felt like a giddy girl. I couldn’t believe I was so close to going through with it, but couldn’t stop thinking about it and remembering how he had felt. The only thing I had started to regret about that night and throughout the weekend was the fact that I didn’t take him up on his offer. And no, we never exchanged names. He knew how to find me.”

“Did you ever run into him again?”

I laugh. “Boy, did I.”

THAT ENTIRE WEEKEND, my mind was on him—the guy that fingered me into oblivion. The first thing I did Saturday was call Reggie to set up a lunch date. I had to tell her what I had done. She was going to be so proud that after two years of knowing me, I had finally drawn a line on one of her items she placed on the list we came up with together.

“Oh my God! You were finger fucked by a hot guy in the club’s bathroom?”

I nodded with my hand over my mouth attempting to cover my silly smile.

“Holy shit! It’s about time.” She sat back in her chair, deep in thought—mostly disbelief. She quickly sat back up, leaning into the table. “Wait. When did that happen? Where was I?”

I eyed her, cocking my brow as I did. “Umm, you were too busy with that on again off again ex of yours.”

“Oh shit. I’m an awful friend.” She admitted with a slight look of regret on her face.

“No, you’re not. You’re just my overly horny friend,” I teased.

“Apparently, I’m not the only one. You little minx you.” She reached across the table and playfully slapped my arm. “How’d you manage to keep from going any further? Because once you’ve already compromised the way you were, talking your mind and body out of going through with the deed is damn near impossible.”

“No idea. Not that I didn’t want to go further with him. I just couldn’t go through with it that way.”

The waiter brought our food over and we finished our lunch date with typical conversation. She ranted about Chance and how good he is in the sack, but how she’s afraid that’s where it ends. Then she jumped to her job working as a make-up consultant. It truly is the most fitting job for her. Far better off than if she would have stuck it out here. She’s way too much of a people person to be confined all day in an office. Me on the other hand, I enjoyed alone time.

The rest of my weekend went by in sort of a blur. I tried to keep my mind off of Friday night and what was going to happen at work on Monday. The nerves were starting to settle in since I had no idea what to expect. Usually the research is discussed in our weekly meetings. And it was never discussed on Friday. So, not knowing what I was about to be diving into had me more than antsy.

I walked into work Monday morning with my head held high. My life was about to change for the better. I was going to prove to Mr. Callahan how valuable of an asset I was—without having to give my knees rug burn in the process.

“Why are you so fucking chipper?” Rachel stopped in front of me, accessing my mood. I took in her appearance. Her deep red hair stopped right above where her breasts protruded from her top. The silver chunky necklace that dangled between the crack of them only directed the eyes of everyone around right to where she wanted them. I looked up at her face realizing why she’d rather have people staring at her boobs.

Rachel is an attractive woman, underneath all the makeup and slutty attire. The things people do to get noticed. It was sad really. And pathetic.

“I have my reasons,” I said, trying to walk around her.

She put her hand out, stopping me. “Did you get fucked this weekend? Is that why you can’t stop smiling?” She wore a mischievous smile like she had just found the Holy Grail or hidden immunity idol.

“It’s really none of your business, Rachel.” I rushed past her, refusing to allow her to dampen my good mood. And plus, she was half-right. But I definitely refused to let her revel in that fact.

Shortly after I made my way into my office, Mr. Callahan walked in holding a few papers and some sort of binder.

“Here are the details to your assignment.” He dropped the papers on my desk and took a seat.

I read over the details with wide eyes. Surely it was wrong. It had to be wrong. I mean what in the world kind of book did the author need that kind of information for?

“A porn star?” I looked up, catching a slight glimmer in his eyes. He nodded, not speaking. “I have to go and follow a porn star around for a week?”

“Yes. Well, a former porn star who is coming out of retirement. And if you keep reading, you’ll see that we’ve arranged an apartment for you both to stay at during that time. You know, so nothing gets missed on your end.” He gave me a full-blown smirk.

What an asshole. He had the perfect assignment for me alright.

“I’ve even included a questionnaire in there that the author wants answered. And the full details of what is expected from you.”

Holy shit. I thought I was going to die. I couldn’t live with a porn star for a week. I doubt I could even interview one here in my office with a straight face. How in the world was I supposed to be around one twenty-four-seven?

“This is a once in a lifetime chance, Lucy.” He stood, looking down at me with a serious face. “But if you’re not ready for this, I can find someone who is more…willing.”

“No.” I bolted up out of my chair. “I got this.”

“Good. Then you need to go ahead and head home and gather what you’ll need for the next week.” He pulled a key out of his pocket and held it out for me to grab. “Your assignment starts today.”

I grabbed the key and formed a fist around it, holding it tightly in my hand. I held it so tight I could fill the ridges biting into my skin. But I didn’t care. That key I held was going to either make or break me.

With determination, I stuck out my empty hand, shaking Mr. Callahan’s large hand. “I won’t let you down,” I said with an unwavering voice.

He let out a heavy sigh while tightly shaking my hand before releasing it. “I know you won’t.” He held out the binder for me to take. “You’re going to need these.” I gave him a confused look not understanding the plural-ness of that statement, but knew I’d find out soon enough.

Placing my laptop, charger, and the papers and binder Mr. Callahan had given me into my bag, I glanced around my office one last time knowing I’d see it again in a week, before turning off the light and shutting the door behind me. I turned around almost walking right into Rachel. The unexpected close proximity surprised me, causing me to drop the key I had in my hand.

“Didn’t mean to startle you,” she said with amusement in her voice as she bent down to grab the key. She slowly eased her way back up as she methodically rotated the key in her hand, curiously staring at it. Before I could ask her for it back, she whipped out her factory smile and held her hand out for me to grab it. “You’re welcome by the way.”

“Thanks,” I mumbled as I placed the key in my pocket. “If you wouldn’t have been standing behind me all creeper like, I wouldn’t have dropped it in the first place.”

She flipped her hair back, before letting her hand glide down her collarbone, fingering the dangling necklace she was wearing. “Oh, that’s not what you should be thanking me for.” She let out a laugh.

I was getting tired of her games. The thought of pushing her crossed my mind. If anyone asked, I’d say she tripped. I mean, it was bound to happen at some point wearing the hooker heels she always wore, right? Well, that’s what I thought and it would’ve been my story—if I would’ve pushed her. But the goody-goody in me kept me from pursuing drastic measures. The goody-goody in me always had me over analyzing everything. Kept me making safe decisions. I was beginning to wonder how beneficial it was. To never just throw caution to the wind and say screw it and go after something new and exciting. And push Rachel down while I was at it.

Maybe the week interview I was about to embark on would be the eye opener I needed. Being around a porn star was going to either turn me into more of a recluse or somehow emerge me from the rock I had dug myself under.

She rolled her eyes in annoyance at my hesitation to prompt her for an explanation. “You can thank me for that key in your pocket and the assignment you were handed.” She leaned in, causing me to inch my head back. “I’m not into gay porn stars,” she whispered with a smirk. And with a look of sheer satisfaction, she smiled and turned away, basically skipping her way down the hall.