I Can Make You Hot! (31 page)

Gr-r-r-anola

My Favorite Cereal

I’m not a big fan of cereal, and I literally feel fat when I read what’s on most cereal labels. But I can’t deny my girls this classic childhood breakfast, so I came up with my own cereal concoction that contains everything I love and everything my body needs to do what it’s supposed to do in the morning. Make the mixture in advance and store it in a jar or Ziploc bag for up to two weeks to cook up whenever you want. Add the dehydrated fruit just before serving.

MAKES 8 SERVINGS

7 cups quick-cooking oats

1 cup wheat germ

1 cup wheat bran

½ cup honey or agave nectar (
footnote
)

½ cup water

1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon (optional)

1 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg (optional)

1 teaspoon fine sea salt

2 cups dehydrated blueberries and strawberries

Preheat oven to 275° F.

In a large bowl, combine the oats, wheat germ, and wheat bran and mix well.

In a medium bowl, combine the honey and water. Mix in the vanilla, cinnamon, nutmeg, and salt. Stir the honey-water mixture into the oat mixture until it is evenly moist. Transfer to a large, shallow baking dish or rimmed baking sheet.

Bake for 45 minutes, stirring every 15 minutes, until lightly brown. Add the dehydrated fruit and serve.

Scrambled Eggs with Spinach–Teddy’s Breakfast of Champions

This is my younger daughter Teddy’s favorite breakfast. She always asks for it on her birthday. Putting the frozen spinach directly into the hot eggs allows it to melt but not turn to mush. It’s delicious. You really need to try it.

MAKES 2 SERVINGS

4 large eggs

2 tablespoons soy or coconut milk

One half of a 12-ounce package frozen spinach, thawed

Spray an 8-inch frying pan with organic nonstick cooking spray and heat the pan over medium heat.

While the pan is heating, beat the eggs and milk together in a bowl. Pour the eggs into the hot pan, lay the spinach on top, and scramble.

always use a nonstick pan

When you use nonstick pans you also use a lot less oil, which means a lot less fat in your food.

Extra-Easy Oatmeal

When I was looking for more fun recipes to try with my girls, I came up with this one—it’s about the easiest recipe on earth. The kids have been eating it every morning before going off to camp ever since. It’s also great if you’re cooking in a college dorm, or if you’re working twenty-four hours a day and don’t have time to actually cook breakfast.

MAKES 1 SERVING

²
/
₃
cup 100% stone-ground oats (not steel-cut and no quick-cooking stuff)

Water to cover

¼ cup dehydrated blueberries

¼ cup dehydrated banana, or other fruit of your choice

Ground cinnamon (optional)

Put the oats in a large bowl and add enough water to cover it completely. Cover the bowl and refrigerate overnight (if you don’t, the fruit could start to ferment). The oats will soak up the water and in the morning you’ll have a ready-made bowl of cereal.

The following day, add the dehydrated fruit and cinnamon to taste, if you like, and eat the cereal cold or nuke it for a minute or two if you prefer to eat it hot.

My Favorite Pancakes

I’m not the greatest pancake maker, and I probably never will be. But what I am very good at is thinking of unusual things and then doing them. We have apple trees on our front lawn, so why not make apple pancakes with our own apples? My girls picked the apples and almost fell out of one or two trees—I’m assuming intentionally since every kid is supposed to do that, right? Our three dogs were barking madly and it was a scene out of a movie: wild hair, barking dogs, children screaming with laughter, and the overprotective and worried mother shouting, “Stop. You guys, stop!” Needless to say, we picked more than enough apples, made them into apple pancakes, and I still had enough left over for a pie, which I will save for a sequel to this book called
I Can Make You Fat.
When in pancake doubt, have fun, add fruit, and see if pancakes can be a vehicle for creating great memories for your family.

MAKES 4 SERVINGS

1½ cups all-purpose flour

3½ teaspoons baking powder

1 teaspoon fine sea salt

1 tablespoon sugar

1¼ cups unsweetened coconut milk, soy milk, or any milk of your choice

1 large egg, beaten

1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

3 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

2 diced apples, sliced bananas, or dehydrated fruit of your choice

In a large bowl, sift together the flour, baking powder, salt, and sugar. Make a well in the center and pour in the milk, egg, vanilla, and melted butter; mix until smooth.

Heat a lightly oiled griddle or frying pan over medium-high heat. Pour or scoop the batter onto the griddle, using approximately ¼ cup for each pancake. Cook the pancakes until lightly browned. When bubbles appear on the tops, flip the pancakes and brown on the opposite side. Serve topped with the fruit.

VARIATION
: Instead of (or in addition to), the fruit, top your pancakes with agave nectar (see
footnote
), honey, cinnamon sugar, or jam.

Iguana I Wanna–Cornmeal Pancakes

These were inspired by some pancakes I had in Tulum, Mexico. I know Mexico isn’t known for its pancakes; however, these were the best I have ever had in my life. They were thick, like a corn cake, and I wound up ordering them for breakfast every day after my run on the beach.

Bradley, my BFF hairdresser, was with me on the trip, and one morning as we were enjoying our pancakes, I spotted an iguana who was cozying up to our table. Bradley jumped out of his seat in terror, and once I stopped laughing, I began to feed the iguana some of my pancake. He loved it. So that’s how I came to have an iguana for my dining partner instead of my friend.

MAKES 4 SERVINGS

1 cup cornmeal

1 cup Bisquick

2 large eggs

1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1 cup soy milk

1 banana, sliced

Combine all of the ingredients except for the banana in a mixing bowl.

Spray a griddle or a large frying pan with nonstick cooking spray. When it is hot, add the batter, a ladleful at a time depending on the size of the pancakes you want. When the batter begins to firm up, add some banana slices to each pancake. When the corn cakes are browned, flip and brown the opposite sides. Enjoy—with or without an iguana.

So Smooth Smoothie

My mom loved smoothies with almonds. She was very active and always a light eater, so even though we were Midwesterners through and through, she would sneak in some “new food options,” which became the root of my own “healthy options” today. Thank you, Mom, for always taking me on a run, never criticizing me for my athletic build, always wanting the best for me, and for pushing me to be better than I thought I could be. Here’s your smoothie, which I now make for my girls (but without the almonds). Sorry about that, but I never really liked almonds in my smoothies—Just not, well,
smooth
enough!

MAKES 1 SERVING

3 sliced fresh strawberries

2 handfuls fresh blueberries

¼ cup freshly squeezed orange juice

1 ripe banana

1 tablespoon of BaNilla low-fat yogurt

5 ice cubes

Ground cinnamon, for garnish (optional)

Put the strawberries and blueberries in a blender. Slowly pour in the orange juice through the top as you blend. Then add the banana and yogurt, and finish with the ice cubes. Garnish with a sprinkle cinnamon, if desired.

don’t drink your fruit

I believe that eating fruit is a lot better than drinking fruit juice. Fruit has a lot of fiber; drinking juice is really like drinking a big glass of sugar. So, as a general rule, my advice is to eat your fruit; don’t drink it.

Smoothies, the one above included, are made with a lot of real, whole fruit, so you can drink your fruit and have it, too!

Gr-r-r-anola

If you make this in advance and store it in an airtight container, you’ll always have a healthy breakfast on hand for days when you’re in a hurry.

MAKES 6 SERVINGS

3 cups rolled oats

1 cup wheat germ

1 cup slivered almonds

1 cup dehydrated banana chips

1 teaspoon almond extract

1 teaspoon ground ginger

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

¼ cup plus 2 tablespoons agave nectar (see
footnote
) or an equal amount of honey or maple syrup

¼ cup vegetable oil

Preheat the oven to 250°F.

Combine all of the ingredients in a bowl. Spread out the granola in a large baking dish or rimmed baking sheet and bake for 1 hour, or until golden brown. If you like smaller pieces, stir once or twice while baking. I happen to like mine chunkier, but it’s up to you.

Soups and Salads

Jimmy Achoo’s Chicken Soup

Rich and Skinny Cauliflower Soup with Kale Chips

Kelly Green Salad

Supermodel Salad

Kelly Beet Salad

If You Like Piña Coladas Salad

Watermelon Salad

Christmas Salad

Ivy League Chopped Salad

Warm Quinoa Salad

Kelly’s Undressed Salad Dressing

Vogue Salad

Jimmy Achoo’s Chicken Soup

Jimmy Choo is, of course, a famous shoe designer, but for some reason, whenever I or one of my friends used to get a cold, we’d joke about sounding like
“jimmy a choo.”
This soup got its name because of the longstanding relationship between chicken soup and curing a cold. I’ve added cauliflower, which I love, love, love. While everyone else seems to be trying to conceal their veggies for maximum food love, I’m putting mine out there, front and center. In fact, this soup is filled with veggie exploitation.

MAKES 10 SERVINGS

3 quarts cold water

One 4-pound chicken, quartered

2 packets Goya seasoning with cilantro and achiote

6 large carrots, thinly sliced

3 large celery stalks, sliced

3 small parsnips, peeled and sliced

1 large onion, peeled and cut into 8 wedges

2 tablespoons fine sea salt

¼ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

6 small red new potatoes, boiled in their skins

1 large head cauliflower, cut into florets

Pour the cold water into a large stockpot, add the chicken, and bring to a boil, skimming the foam as it rises to the surface. Add the Goya seasoning, 4 cups of the carrots, the celery, parsnips, onion, 2 teaspoons of the salt, and the pepper. Simmer, partially covered, until the chicken is cooked and beginning to fall off the bones, 1 to 2 hours.

Transfer the chicken to a plate, and when it is cool enough to handle, remove and discard the skin and bones. Shred the meat and set it aside.

Add the remaining 2 cups carrots and the remaining 4 teaspoons salt to the soup and simmer, covered, for 5 minutes. Add the potatoes, cauliflower, and shredded chicken, and cook until heated through.