I Want Candy (50 page)

“Probably,” Eric agreed. “All I know is…my life’s a disaster – girl after girl, drink after drink – getting high. Just last night I was at a party smokin’ weed. I was drinkin’ like a fish. I was torn up. I was depressed because I messed up my life so bad. I don’t have you anymore. I don’t have my job anymore. My money’s low.” Eric struggled to talk.

“Shhh. Stop speaking,” Candy said as she patted his forehead with a cool cloth.

“No, you need to hear this. I did you wrong. I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve it. You were a good wife, a good woman. I took my issues out on you. I was…jealous.” Eric’s eyes watered up. “I wanted what you had because…I wanted to be able to be the provider. I hated you for somethin’ I should’ve been proud of you for. I was livin’ in your house. I wanted to build you a house that…was ten times better than that. Then…I live with the guilt every day…” Eric’s eyes filled with tears. One by one, they rolled down his face. “…I live with the guilt every day that I accidentally killed our little girl.” He gripped Candy’s hand tightly. Candy turned away, still holding his hand, as she cried silently.

Eric whimpered. “My pride got in the way. I’m an alcoholic, an addict, and a stupid man.” He continued to cry.

“Eric, please stop it. This isn’t helping right now,” Candy urged as she turned back to him.

“I wish I could have you back, but I know that bridge has been burned. I’m sittin’ here with two broken ribs. God was on my side because the car’s wrapped around a tree. I should’ve been dead. I was speedin’. I could’ve killed someone. I wish I had died.” Eric shoved his head back in the pillow and began to wail as his crying increased. He gripped Candy’s hand tighter. Two nurses ran in, pushing Candy out of the way as they checked him.

“His heart rate has dropped,” one of them said quickly as she paged the doctor. Candy stood back horrified. She exited the hospital room and went back to the lobby to join Eric’s family. Diane walked up to her and hugged her again. She grabbed both of Candy’s hands and held them.

“He’s gonna be OK. I know it in my heart,” Diane said as she looked up at the ceiling. Candy nodded as she sat down next to Diane, crying.

“Candy, I didn’t tell you this when I’d call you every now and again, but he really hasn’t been right since…my grandbaby didn’t make it. Eric took that very hard. The problem is, he’s never forgiven himself, and I don’t think he ever will. He was afraid to be a father, but he wanted that little girl. I want you to know that.” Diane looked at Candy sincerely.

“I realized that sometime after,” Candy said. “After he and I divorced, I found a card he had written. It had all the things he wanted to do with her – teach her how to ride a bike, build her a dollhouse – all sorts of things,” Candy smiled weakly.

The doctor walked into the lobby. “Is this the family of Eric Fields?” he asked as he put his pen back in his jacket pocket.

“Yes,” everyone said together.

“He’s stabilized now. He’s asking for ‘Candy Fields.’”

“Her last name’s ‘Benet’ now,” one of Eric’s sisters said as she walked into the lobby. Diane patted Candy’s back as she headed back towards his room.

“Sit over here,” Eric said as Candy stood, looking down at him.

“I’m OK now. One of my eyes is swollen up, but I can see you good out of the right one,” he smiled. He took her hand again. “What’s wrong Candy Cane? I know you. I know when something’s wrong,” Eric said.

“Just…you. I’m glad you’re OK,” she smiled.

“Nah, that’s not it,” Eric said as he looked up at the ceiling. “I know that look. I’ve seen it before. Unfortunately, I was the cause of it.”

“I don’t want to lay anything on you right now. You’re in bad shape. We can discuss it later,” she assured.

Eric struggled to sit up. “No!” Candy snapped as she leapt up. “Let me help you. You can’t sit up on your own with busted ribs.” She helped prop him up with pillows.

“Always the caregiver, even when people don’t deserve it,” Eric said with a grin. “If you don’t tell me right now, I’ll find another way to get it out of you, so you may as well let me know what the deal is.”

Candy sighed then began to tell Eric the entire sordid story. Fifteen minutes later he closed his eyes and exhaled. “Candy, Candy, Candy. As much as I’d like you back, it’s more important to me that you be happy. I can see you’re miserable. You can’t let this go on another day. He’s basically planned to rape you, telling you in advance like that makes it OK!” Eric raised his voice in anger. “It’s a good thing I’m in this hospital. I’d go to his hotel room and fuck him up!”

“Eric, lower your voice!” Candy urged. “I’m so ashamed,” she cried.

Eric squeezed her hand. “Ashamed of what? For falling in love? You’ve got nothing to be ashamed about. For what it’s worth, I knew your boss had a crush on you,” Eric confessed.

“What?” Candy said as she rubbed Eric’s hand.

Eric nodded. “Yeah. A man knows these things. When I’d go to your job to pick you up for lunch sometimes, he’d look at you strange. He’d look at me then at you, and when he’d catch me starin’ back, he’d turn away real fast. I only noticed it towards the end of our marriage. I knew something was up, but I knew in my heart nothin’ was goin’ on, so I never brought it up.”

“He never flirted with me until we were divorced,” Candy assured.

“You don’t have to explain anything to me, Baby. I know. I know you’d never cheat on me, and from the things you had said about him, he didn’t seem like the type to act on it. I knew he liked you more than as an employee or friend is all I’m sayin’. It was obvious.” Eric looked down into his lap sadly. “Enough of that though. We’ve to get you out of this mess.”

“We?
We
have to do nothing. You need to rest.” Candy’s cell phone rang. She grunted.

“Who’s that?” Eric asked as he tried to read her caller-ID.

Candy grimaced. “It’s
him
. It’s Quentin.”

“Gimme that damn phone!” Eric lunged towards Candy then withdrew painfully.

“Eric, no. If he finds out I’m with you, he may get even crazier,” Candy said.

“So you’re just gonna let him ruin your life, force you to have sex and dates and all this other shit? This dude’s a nut. I thought I was out there. On my highest and drunkest day, I’d never do some shit like this. This is about control, Candy. He saw you were happy and wants to destroy that. He doesn’t really want you back. He just thinks he does. He realized you moved on, and it bruised his little ego. You should call the cops on him!”

“I can’t. That would make it worse. I just need more time to figure this out.” Her voice message icon lit up. Candy looked at her phone hesitantly.

“Put it on speaker phone,” Eric demanded as she put in her password and played the message.

“Hi, Baby, this is Quentin, of course. Hey, I have a song I want to dedicate to you.” In the background played Notorious B.I.G.’s “Fuck You Tonight.” Quentin laughed deeply then hung up.

Eric rolled his eyes in disgust. “No way, Candy. You gotta stop this, now! At this point, so what if he tells about your relationship. He’s torturin’ you to death. I think you need to tell someone that can help you. I’m laid up here and can’t do anything, but you need to contact HR or someone. This guy’s harassin’ you.”

Candy wiped her face. “I can’t, Eric. It would ruin Gabriel’s career. We just found out another manager got fired for having a relationship at work.”

“They can’t fire him for datin’ you. Firing for that’s against the law unless,” Eric informed.

“Well, that isn’t entirely true at our company. It varies from company to company. Once you sign the contract to work there, you have to abide by their rules,” Candy frowned. “He’s my supervisor, so it makes it even worse.”

Eric nodded. They moved on to lighter subjects, and some time later Eric kissed her goodbye on the cheek.

“I’m gonna check on you tomorrow,” Candy said as she patted his hand once more before she left. Eric waited a few minutes, then picked up the hospital phone. He cleared his throat and waited.

“Hi, this is Eric Fields. I’m Candy Fields, I mean, Candy Benet’s ex-husband. I need to speak to Gabriel Justice right away. It’s extremely important.”

* * *

Gabriel pulled up to his parents’ sprawling, brick, ranch home. Snow covered the front lawn in an undisturbed, white blanket. The worn American flag still waved on their front porch, the red and blue now faded with time. He closed his car door and slowly approached the front steps. Opening the squeaky screen door, he knocked softly, then waited. A small woman with high cheekbones and silver hair answered the door.

“Hi, Ma,” Gabriel said as he looked down at her. She reached her hand up to his face and stroked it. “My boy! My handsome son is here!” She immediately grabbed his hand and led him inside. “I didn’t think you’d come,” she said as she raced around, picking up the place.

“Well, I invited you and Dad for Christmas and had to cancel, so I thought I should accept your offer.” Gabriel smiled as he sat down on the old, plaid couch. He looked around the house and scowled.

“Ma, what are you and Dad doing with the money I sent you earlier in the year? I sent it to you so you could get new furniture,” Gabriel said in a worried tone. His mother shrugged.

“You know how your father is. He saved it. He’s afraid of being penniless. Let me get you something to eat. Oh, Gabriel, you’re so fetching. How’s my Allison?” she asked as she retreated happily into the small, yellow, wallpapered kitchen. Gabriel looked around his childhood home then shut his eyes, trying desperately to block out the unpleasant memories.

“She’s great. Mama, I’m not staying long. No need to get me anything to eat.”

“But you drove so far, why not?” she asked, sorrow in her voice.

“Because, Mama, you know I just can’t be here. I’m here for
you
and you only.” Gabriel folded his hands across his lap and looked aimlessly over at the old rabbit-eared television.

His father entered the room. Holding his knobby brown and gold cane, the stooped over man made his way across the time-worn shag carpet. He sat down across from Gabriel in his favorite light-blue faux suede chair. Gabriel watched as his father put on his black-rimmed glasses and glared at him. He looked much different than the man that Gabriel used to fear. He seemed to be a shell of his old self.

“So you finally decided to bring your ass home to see your folks, eh? Glad to see the city didn’t make you forget about us all together,” his father scowled. “You invite us down for Christmas dinner, get your mama all excited, then cancel at the last second. You always were rotten! Inconsiderate brat!” his father barked. Gabriel ignored him, turning back to the television.

“Gabe, I’m speaking to you. I don’t care how old you are, I’m still your father. You could at least say hello in my house!” He stomped his foot.

“Hello, Mr. Justice,” Gabriel said defiantly. “A father is a man who creates, raises, and loves children. You only did one.”

“Don’t you dare talk to me like that! You were always a smart alec. You were a fat fucker that always had to have the last word. You thought you were smarter than your old man, but you weren’t and still aren’t. So what if you made straight A’s! ‘A’ must have stood for ‘asshole!’ I don’t care that you’re on that there television! You may be a big shot in the city, but you’re a little fat kid who thought you were better than me here! If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t have gone to college. I’m the reason for your success!”

Gabriel slowly crossed his legs and looked through his father as if he were transparent. His face expressed no emotion which only angered his father more.

“Please stop,” Gabriel’s mother pleaded as she touched her husband’s shoulder.