Ice Ice Babies (3 page)

“Just avoiding crying-baby central,” I say in a low voice, smiling as Rukh hides the block in one enormous fist and little Rukhar giggles and reaches for his dad’s hand. Smart kid. Not even six months old and I’m pretty sure he’s ahead of most normal human babies. “How are you guys?”

“Just working on trying to hitch together this stupid storm tracker. I thought it might be helpful for the upcoming season, but I can’t get it to turn on and I need to ask the computer about it and she’s back at the ancestor ship. Grr.” Harlow shakes a fist at the square, piecemeal machine in her lap.

“Are you guys going back to the ancestor ship soon?” I know she and Rukh prefer living there, because Rukh’s still not big on tribe life after living in exile for so long.

She shakes her head and moves a tiny wire with her fingers. “Vektal’s got everyone on lockdown after that whole Lila thing. You know how he gets.”

I sigh. Yeah, I do. When he feels people are fucking around or the tribe isn’t running like a well-oiled machine, Vektal gets all iron-fist and cracks down on who comes and goes. “Probably doesn’t help that the hunting is bad and the winter’s gonna suck.” I smooth a hand over Anna’s white-blonde hair. “Dagesh has been out twenty-four-seven hunting to try and prep for winter - sorry, the brutal season.”

“Yup. Add all that together, and we’re gonna be here for now.”

As Rukh hides the block from Rukhar again, sending the baby into peals of laughter, I frown. My mate’s out every day…and yet here’s Rukh, playing with his son. I try not to feel jealous, but it’s hard. “You going out soon, Rukh?” I can’t help it; I have to ask.

He shakes his head. “Out two. Back one.”

Rukh is normally pretty short with words, but that makes no sense to me. I glance over at Harlow to clarify.

“Just got back from a two-day stint,” Harlow says, casting an affectionate look at her mate. “Today’s his day off. He goes back out again tomorrow.”

“You mean you guys get days off?” I joke, but I’m not finding it funny. Dagesh never takes a day off.

“Well, yeah,” Harlow says, looking up at me. The magnifiers make her eyes seem enormous. “Man’s gotta get some rest. R&R and all that.”

“Of course.” I need to talk to Dagesh, then. Why isn’t he taking a day to relax? And then of course, the worry sets in again. Is it me? Is he avoiding me? That can’t be it. We’re resonance mates.

But then I think of Asha and Hemalo…and my stomach goes a little sour. “Well, I’m off,” I say, smiling at them despite my worry. “I need to go find Asha and say hello.”

“You do? Have fun.” Harlow’s tone is absent and she bends back over her machine. “Hey, Rukh, Can you put a finger here on this bracket, babe, while I work?”

I leave their cave, thinking about Dagesh. Dagesh, who never takes a day of rest. I’m concerned. My mate’s a good man. He’s strong and brave and tireless. He likes to joke that he’s a hunter, not a thinker, but I think he’s plenty smart. And I love him. I love his smile, his scent, the way he gives me that adorably blank stare when I use a human term he doesn’t understand. I love seeing him with the babies. I can’t imagine being with anyone else.

But there has to be something bothering him.

An awful stink starts to emanate from one of the babies slung in the chest carrier I’m wearing. Ah, crap. It’s diaper time. I make it to Asha and Hemalo’s cave just in time to see Hemalo stalking out, spear in hand and fur cloak over his shoulders. He gives me a courteous nod but doesn’t stop. The privacy screen is open, though, so I knock on the stone wall - a mental ‘leftover’ from human life even though the sound is practically inaudible - and step inside.

“I told you to go away,” Asha snaps, not looking in my direction as she pulls her furs higher. She’s lying in her blankets, her back to me. “Go hunt and leave me be.”

“It’s me,” I say timidly. “Is this a bad time?”

She turns and sits up, startled. Her gaze flicks to the entrance of her cave, then to me and my babies. “Why are you here?”

Well, it’s not the friendliest greeting but I can’t blame her. I smile brightly. “I thought I would come by and see if you wanted to help me sort tea leaves.”

She pushes her inky black hair back and narrows her eyes at me, as if she can’t quite figure me out. “Sort…tea?”

“Yes. I have a pile of dried leaves and no clue with what to do with them.” That part’s true at least. I’m not much for domestic stuff. Every time there’s a tea-leaf picking, I just grab handfuls of the stuff and go back to my normal chores. Could be why my tea normally tastes like, well, lawn clippings.

Her gaze flicks from my face down to the babies. “Your kit has a dirty loincloth.” She touches her ridged nose. “I can smell it.”

“I noticed that too. It’s a smell that lingers so I should probably head back to my cave unless you want to scent yours up with some baby doody.”

A hint of a smile touches her face. “You can change her here. I do not mind.”

I have a sneaking suspicion it’s so she can leave the dirty diaper on her mate’s side of the bed or something. I can’t help but notice that there’s two sleeping pallets in the cave. Obviously Hemalo and Asha aren’t sharing anything more than a room. “That’s okay. We can go back to my cave and I can put the babies in their baskets there.”

For a moment I think she’s going to decline, but then she shrugs and gets to her feet. “If you can find no one else to help you…”

She thinks she’s my last resort? Aw. That’s kinda sad. I beam her a smile. “Actually I came to you because Maylak says you have a good eye for this sort of thing. You’re so sweet to help me, truly.”

Her smile broadens and there’s a bit of spring in her step as she slips on her boots and then follows me out of her cave back to mine. I keep up a steady stream of small talk as we walk back, because I know that the others are going to be watching us together, curious. Let them be curious. I’ve decided Asha needs including and damn it, I’m going to include her.

We get back to my cave and I sigh at the sight of it. My furs are everywhere and the babies’ things seem to be scattered everywhere. “I’m sorry about the mess.”

“Do not worry,” she says, leaning over to pick up a discarded blanket. “You have your hands full with two kits. Even one is a challenge.”

“I’d say it’s too much, but the truth is, I wouldn’t change a thing,” I admit. “I love them both so much.” I carefully pull the twins free from the baby sling on my chest and then set them in their beds. Elsa needs changing, and I pull off her little tunic and diaper as quickly as I can, because Anna’s starting to screech at being put down.

To my surprise, Asha picks up Anna and tucks the baby against her shoulder. There’s a look of fierce joy and longing that crosses her face, and she closes her eyes, just holding my baby against her. There’s an aching lump in my throat at the sight. Poor Asha. For all that she can be unpleasant, she’s also unhappy.

“Thank you,” I tell her softly. “Sometimes I don’t have enough hands.”

She chuckles and opens her eyes, her big blue hands cradling Anna with the utmost care. “You may borrow mine at any time.”

“You joke, but I might take you up on that,” I tell her as I clean Elsa off and change her clothing. When I turn around, Asha’s settling in on my favorite stool and Anna’s asleep tucked against her shoulder. She holds her other hand out for Elsa, and looks excited at the thought of holding both of my squirmy, fussy children. Like I’m going to turn that down? I hand her Elsa and she settles the baby carefully in the cradle of her lap, one hand resting on her to make sure she stays in place. She seems to know instinctively how to hold the twins, and then I feel bad for thinking that. Of course she knows how to hold a baby - she had one of her own, even if it was only for a few days.

And now that someone else has the babies? I feel so…relaxed. “You sure you don’t mind?” I ask her, hesitating.

“It is my joy to help out,” she says, and presses a smiling kiss to Anna’s tiny head. This is the most I think I’ve seen Asha smile in the two years we’ve been here.

“Well, while you keep them busy, I’m going to grab my tea bag,” I say, and head to the far corner of the cave where, theoretically, stuff should be neatly stored and is instead stacked messily. I’m not much of a housekeeper and with infant twins? That idea went right out the window.

“Take your time,” she murmurs.

I do, straightening a few things and chatting with her as I tidy up. Eventually, I grab my tea bag and several bowls and dump the lot onto a sorting skin. Tea’s a big deal with the sa-khui. There’s no soda fountain, no coffee, no nothing to drink but water, so they’re experts at flavoring things with tea and know just what leaves to use to get the best flavors. Me, not so much. They just look like piles of leaves to my inexpert eye. “So like, what are the best flavors that go together?”

“Which flavors do you like?” Her voice is dreamy. I glance over and her expression is soft with longing as she holds my children. “I am jealous of you, you know. You have two and I have none.” Her eyes are curiously shiny.

“Mmm.” I sort through the leaves, doing my best to ignore the twinge of unease her words stir in me. “I hope this isn’t a prelude to you deciding to snatch one of them.” There’s nothing but silence at my joke, and I look up to see her aghast expression. “Oooor maybe that’s just a human thing?”

“Humans steal the kits of other humans?” She looks horrified. “Why?”

“Because they want one? I don’t know. Some people aren’t well.” The look on her face makes me feel better, though. I guess it never occurred to her. Gosh, sometimes I love this ice planet for being so darn simple and uncomplicated.

“I would never take your kits, No-rah.” There’s a wounded note in her voice.

“Oh, I know you won’t, Asha. I’m just messing with you. Now which tea leaves make a really good breakfast flavor?” I hope she’ll take the hint for the topic change.

But her expression doesn’t change. “Your kits are beautiful, but I miss mine.” She holds Anna, tucked under her chin, and closes her eyes for a long, long moment. “My Shamalo did not live to have her khui. She was too small at birth.” Her sad eyes blink open. “Now I have nothing.”

Jeez, she’s going to make me cry. I reach over and pat her knee. “You have your mate.”

She snorts. Her eyes roll with disgust. “I do not want him. Not now, not ever. If there is no kit to be made, I would not care if I never saw him again.”

Ouch. “Well, look on the bright side. If he’s out hunting for long periods of time, you won’t miss him like I miss my mate.”

“It is not an easy time,” she agrees.

“And having two babies doesn’t help things,” I say glumly, picking up a dried leaf and then tossing it aside. “Nora can’t exactly get her groove back if Nora’s mate isn’t around.”

“Groof?”

I wave a hand. “Nothing. I’m just whining and lonely.”

“He will not touch you?” Asha asks, the expression on her face shrewd. “Is that what groof means?”

“Something like that.” Now I’m embarrassed I brought it up.

“Did you ask him to touch you?”

Her blunt words make me blush. “I shouldn’t have to ask after I had his kids, should I?”

“You are tired. He is tired. Perhaps he thinks you are too tired for his cock.”

Okay, now I really
am
blushing. “Maybe a girl wants to be chased a little.”

“Why?” Now Asha looks genuinely puzzled. “If you want to mate, tell him so. Dagesh is like any other male - he will be more than happy to mate if a female asks.”

“Yes, but…” I cast around for the right way to explain it. “Humans are different. We like to be courted. We like for our man to say sweet words and do nice things for us to show us how much he wants us.”

“Why?” She looks confused. “You are resonance mates. Of course he wants you.”

It occurs to me that if Asha doesn’t get why I want my man to flirt with me, it’s probably likely that Dagesh doesn’t get it, either. Maybe it’s like she says, and he’s waiting for me to roll over and say “Dick, please!” for him to get the hint. Theoretically, that should be easy enough to do…except I just had twins and I’m not feeling my sexiest.

But I miss my mate. I miss the closeness we’ve had and the comfort of his arms. Okay, then. I’m going to have to suck it up and ask for dick. Maybe it’s time for a game plan - a sexy, low-cut tunic, doing something with my hair, even some perfume. I could make myself pretty and available and maybe he’ll get the hint. I finger my grown-out highlights. They’re hideous, but haircuts haven’t been high on my to-do list like napping and, well, napping. “Maybe I’ll do something with my hair.”

She shrugs.

I toy with my strands for a moment longer, and then look over at her. “I don’t suppose you’d want to watch the babies tonight for me? Just for a few hours?”

“So you can demand cock from your mate?” Her eyes gleam with amusement.

Man, we are really going to have to teach these sa-khui a few more delicate euphemisms. I pick up a leaf and twirl it, trying to imagine the set-up for tonight’s seduction. “Something like that, yeah.”

Asha nods. “I will watch them. Also, you should not drink tea from that leaf.”

I look at it more closely now. “Why?”

“It is used for a tea that makes loose stools.” She pats Anna’s back. “A belly cleanse. Very strong.”

I see several of the leaves mixed in with the rest of mine. “Probably a good thing you’re here, then.”

She laughs. “Probably.”

Today was an excellent hunt. My back, my bones and my muscles ache as I hike the trails back to the tribal cave. All day I have hauled dvisti into a new cache and marked it. It was a great deal of food, but there is always more to be done, and there are always more dvisti. As I dragged the last of the half-frozen carcasses to the cache, I saw another herd in the distance, heading toward the mountains. It is a large herd, and it would be smart to follow after them and trim their numbers.

But that is for tomorrow. I could head after them tonight, but I am full of longing to see my mate and my kits. Even if they are sleeping, just seeing their faces will be enough. Every day, I must remind myself what I work for. It is for my No-rah and our little ones. It is so they smile through the long brutal season and do not cry with hunger.