Ice Ice Babies (4 page)

By the time I make it to my cave, I am slow with exhaustion. My No-rah has been busy - the furs are straightened and the baskets re-organized. The fire is not banked for sleep despite the late hour, but the coals are burning low, a sign that it has not been tended. Curled up in the furs is my mate, her cheek resting on her hand. I smile at the sight of her, so lovely, and then move to the kits’ baskets.

They are…empty. Their blankets are flat, no little blue babies with yellow hair inside them.

Raw terror clutches at my chest. Where are my girls? Where are Ah-nah and Ehl-sah? I touch the furs to make sure my eyes do not deceive me, and then rush to No-rah’s side. “Wake! Ah-nah and Ehl-sah! They are gone—“

“Mmm,” No-rah says sleepily. She sits up and her tunic falls over her shoulder, exposing most of one full breast. “The babies? Oh, I had Asha take them tonight.”

“Asha?” I repeat, not sure I have heard correctly. “Hemalo’s Asha?”

“I don’t think she wants to be his,” No-rah says sleepily. “But yes. Was I asleep? I’m sorry. I was only going to nap for a moment…” Her voice trails off into a yawn. “Man, that was a great nap, though.”

Relief pours through me and I begin to relax. I sit down next to my mate and rub my face, yawning as well. “I did not see the kits,” I murmur. “I panicked—“

“It’s all right,” No-rah soothes. Her hands pull at my tunic, undoing the laces, and hers is still hanging low over one shoulder. Her breast gleams pale in the firelight and my cock stiffens in response. Her cool fingers smooth over my skin and my hands ache to touch her.

Then I notice that her pretty mane is shorn off.

I gasp, touching her locks. Before, she had yellow hair below her shoulders but now it is gone. Nothing but the soft brown remains. “Your mane!”

She touches her hair. “Do you like it?”

“It is gone!”

Her face falls. “Is that a no?”

“It is just…why did you cut it?”

“It was all grown out,” No-rah says, and I do not know what that means. “I didn’t like the way it looked.”

The look on her face is wary, and I caress her cheek. “You are lovely, no matter what you do to your hair.” I cannot help but eye it thoughtfully. So strange.

She pats my shoulder and helps me shrug off my filthy tunic. “I’ll wash this for you tomorrow. Are you staying in? The other hunters take a day off every now and then, you know.”

I think of the big herd of dvisti heading toward the mountains. “I must go out and hunt,” I tell her. “There is a new herd close by and it will be much meat.”

No-rah sighs. “If you must.” She moves closer to me, and her full breast brushes against my arm. I bite back my groan of lust. It has been many moons since I claimed my mate, but the last thing I want to do is grab at her when she clearly needs sleep. “How about I give you a massage because you’ve been working so hard?”

“Mah-sashzh?” I do not know this word; I do not even think I can say it.

She gives me a little, flirty smile. “I’ll rub your back for you. It feels good. And then after that, maybe we’ll play a little.” Her finger trails seductively down my stomach.

“I like this idea,” I tell her, cock aching. I watch her with fascinated eyes as she gets to her knees and then pats the furs. I lie down and then a moment later, she puts her hands on me.

And then I cannot help the groan that escapes. As she starts to rub, all the aches and worries of the day ebb. I close my eyes as her hands glide over my skin, pressing against sore muscle and bruised tissue. “I had a good day today,” she says in her soft, sweet voice. “Asha came by and helped me with the babies. I wasn’t sure what to think at first, but I really like her.”

“Mmm?” My mind is in a pleasant fog, drifting. This is something from a dream - my sweet, sexy mate rubbing her hands on my body, me lying down in the furs as she tends to my aches. Her words continue, but I lose focus. I am so very weary.

I will just close my eyes for a moment.

Well, shit.

Sexy massage? It backfired. Big time. I gaze down at my mate, who is sound asleep and snoring, his mouth open on my pillow. I…can’t even be mad. He’s so exhausted. Operation: Sexy Time will just have to wait for another day. I lie down on the furs next to him, wrap an arm around his waist, and decide to sneak a nap myself.

* * *

“
I
don’t understand it
,” I complain to Asha the next morning as we sort through more tea. She’s brought several pouches of her own stash and we’re combining flavors while the babies sit on a nearby fur and flail their arms happily. “I know he loves me. I know he loves the babies. But every time I suggest he stay home and relax, he ignores it and rushes right back out the door to go hunting again.”

Asha plucks a dried twist of leaves from my hand and places it in the section that we’ve marked off as ‘medicines’. Whoops. I really, really don’t have an eye for this sort of thing. “It is fear.”

“Fear?” I echo. “Fear of what?”

She gives me a look. “Fear of failing you. There are none of us in the tribe that have not experienced a brutal season where bellies went empty. That is probably why he hunts so much. He has you, and he has his kits to feed. And I have known Dagesh for a long time. He is very….” She hums, trying to think of the right word. “Devoted.”

I nod slowly. My baby is super responsible. He’s given some tasks that others won’t do, just because Vektal knows he’ll give two hundred percent. I think of Dagesh and I feel guilty. Here I’ve been resenting the fact that he’s out the door before the sun rises, leaving me alone with two small children, and he’s probably been going through an entirely different kind of pressure. I think Asha’s right — he feels an intense need to hunt enough to take care of us. He’s been without family for a long time; I know from late night conversations in the furs that his mother died not long after he was born and his father died in the terrible khui sickness. I think he’s making himself crazy trying to please everyone.

My poor Dagesh. He’s trying so hard. I feel a surge of love for him. His fear is understandable, but it’s not going to help if he runs himself into the ground trying to take care of everyone and everything. He has to realize that there needs to be some balance, and that we’re not going to starve to death the moment he turns his back. Is there a concern over a food shortage? Sure, but everyone else is hunting just a little more, not hunting twenty-four-seven. Everyone else’s mates take a day off to spend with their families. My sweet, obsessed mate needs to put his spear down for a day or two and relax. It would be different if we hated each other like Asha and Hemalo. Then, I wouldn’t mind if he disappeared all day every day. But the truth is…I miss him. I ache for him - not just his body but his smile, his warmth, his presence, his touch, his unwavering support.

I look over at Asha again. “How would you feel about watching the babies for me again?”

Asha goes very still. “You…trust me?”

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I? You’ve been so wonderful to help me the past few days.” I smile at her so she knows I’m not pulling her leg.

Her own smile slowly blossoms across her face. “I would love to.” She leans over and lifts a flailing Anna off the blanket and holds her close. “They are such good kits.”

Are they? That might change when she’s been around them for a full evening, but I can’t disagree - I like to think they’re special, too. “I know I’ll have to feed them so you can come interrupt, of course, but just a few hours of alone time with my mate would be absolutely wonderful.”

“Say no more,” Asha replies. “I will watch them and come to you only if they need to eat. You should convince your mate he needs to rest.”

“That’s the game plan.”

“I think the plan is to get your groof back.”

Heck yeah, it is. I’m totally getting my groof back. I laugh and toss a few leaves into a pouch. Nora’s groof is totally scheduled to come back tonight.

I do not make it back to the tribal caves for several days in a row. The snows fall thick, like a cascading mane, and I cannot see my hand in front of me. I am confined to my hunter cave for two sunrises and then when I can finally emerge, I must go and re-mark the trees that I have left caches at to ensure that they can be found when the snows get higher. By the third sunset, I am on my way back to the tribal cave when a pair of hoppers cross my path and so I hunt them down, too. My mate will have fresh meat tonight. It is something I can be proud of, at least, though I worry over the days missed. I hate that the storms caught me away from the cave - if I had to spend two days lounging around a fire, could I not have done it with my mate in my arms? A burst of longing rushes through me and I think of No-rah and her happy smile. I think of the tufts of yellow mane on my two kits. I miss them all so fiercely it is like a pain in my chest. It makes me walk faster through the snow-covered trails and sloping hills, because I
need
to see them.

I try to keep the worry from my mind as I hike back, but it has been too long. Anything can happen in three full sunrises. What if the tribal cave has been buried by thick snow and no one can get out? What if metlaks have descended upon the caves and attacked my No-rah while she left to gather herbs? What if Ah-nah - who is always crying - has khui sickness and Maylak cannot heal her? What if No-rah’s milk has dried entirely and the kits cannot be fed? Worried thoughts rush through my head like water until I am running back at full speed, desperate to see my family. I need to hear my No-rah’s laugh, I need to touch my daughters on their fat, blue cheeks and make sure they are well.

When I return, Bek is in front of the tribal cave, yawning and leaning against the cliff wall. He looks bored. I know he has guard duty, but the sight of him lounging while I have been hunting tirelessly to feed my family? It does not sit well with me. He rouses himself from the wall as I approach, giving me a cocky look. “Decide to return finally?”

As if I had a choice? “If you are going to guard,” I bite out, “Try being alert. I do not think a metlak would tap you on the shoulder to wake you if it attacks.”

Flustered, he flicks his head, as if he wants to charge at me and lock horns. My tail flicks angrily and I brandish my horns back at him. He wishes a fight? I will give him one.

Bek’s jaw clenches as he approaches me slowly, fists tight. He lifts his chin at me. “I am going to ignore your words and let you pass to see your mate, because we are friends.”

I glare at him but he only taps a hand on my arm and then walks away. “If you still wish to fight in the morning, come see me.”

I am tempted to do so simply from that arrogant comment. But I know Bek. I have grown up with him. He is like me — we are not thinkers, we are doers. I have insulted him, he has insulted me with his arrogance, and we must snarl at each other. My weary mind tells me this, even as my tail lashes back and forth, my body still ready to fight.

A female laugh echoes from inside the cave and I jerk around, reminded that I am close to my mate. Close to my kits. Close to all my females. My family. I have no time to fool around with Bek like two hard-headed dvisti stallions. “I will deal with you another day,” I tell him.

He snorts, reminding me of an angry dvisti after all. “Go chase your female. I will be here, doing my duty.” His voice is sour. “I have nothing else to go home to.”

There is a bitter ring to his words, and I realize he is right. He has nothing and I have my mate and my family waiting for me. I do not need to spend time here fighting with him. A slow smile spreads across my face.

Bek rolls his eyes at me and scoops up his spear as I turn away.

I jog in to the cave, looking for the female laughter. There is a group of females sitting next to Sevvah by the fire, laughing and sewing. My No-rah is not there, and I ignore their calls of greeting and head deeper into the cave, looking for my mate.

She comes out of Vektal and Shor-shie’s cave a moment later, laughing and holding an armful of furs. Her shorn, shoulder-length hair is in two short braids by her ears and her face is lit up with happiness.

“No-rah!” I call out, my heart surging at the sight of her. She is so lovely, my mate. I could gaze at her for hours on end and be content.

Her gaze flicks over to me and she gives a happy little squeak of surprise. No-rah tosses the furs down onto the cave floor and flings herself the short distance to my side, her arms wide. A moment later, she leaps onto me, flinging her arms around my neck and showering my face with kisses.

I hold her tight and kiss her small face back, over and over again. My world is feeling more and more right by the moment. When was the last time she kissed me with such joy? She loves me, but we have been so tired lately. This, I realize, I need just as much as her smiles. I need her kisses, her small, cold human hands sliding over me. “I missed you,” I growl at her, fighting the urge to drag her to the floor and claim her like a barbarian.

No-rah presses another happy kiss to my face. “I missed you, too! Where have you been? I was so worried.”

“Caught in the storm.” I press another kiss to her mouth, but the father in me cannot help but ask, “Where are the kits?”