If Only In His Dreams (25 page)

“Indeed, my dear girl.  I am quite certain they are.  Now, I will go brew you some of my special tea and bring you some toast to help settle you stomach.  Stay here in bed until my return, if you can.”

Darcy returned to his wife’s bedside just after Mrs Hill took her leave of the room.  “My love, is there anything that you need?  A glass of wine perhaps, or a cup of tea?”

“Mrs Hill has gone to brew me her special peppermint tea.  I will be fine until she returns with it.”

Cradling his wife in his arms, Darcy began to rock her gently in his embrace.  “I do not like to see you ill or in pain.  I have had nightmares of you becoming ill and leaving me.  These are painful dreams,
for I cannot bear the thought of losing you.”

“William, do not fret.  Tell me about these dreams you had.”

Shaking his head, Darcy could not look his wife in the eye.  “My grandmother died not long after giving birth to my mother.  She took a fever and never recovered.  My grandfather never recovered.  When my mother gave birth to Georgiana, she also took a fever.  We thought that history would repeat itself, and my father was distraught.  Fortunately my mother recovered; but I will never forget how she looked in her bed; so frail, so overwhelmed from the fever. 
I have feared you being taken from me in such a manner.  Please forgive me, as I know that most ladies wish to be with child soon after they are married.  I do not look forward to learning when you enter into such a state, as, in my dreams, I will lose you.”

“William, it is not something that we need to fear.  My mother’s death was unexpected, as she had taken a fall while she was carrying my sister.  It was believed that she was well, as the fall was several days before she began the pains of labor.  The physician stated that the fall had caused bleeding inside my mother’s womb and this was what took my mother’s and my sister’s life.”

“Even though her death was from a fall, I still cannot imagine losing you to childbirth.  Please, let us not discuss this any further.  As soon as Mr Jones sees you, we will know if you are ill or perhaps you ate something undercooked.”

“Do not fret so, my dear husband.  You will be forced to
endure me until you are old and grey. And we will have several children, and many grandchildren.”  Elizabeth was deeply concerned with her husband’s way of thinking.  If she was indeed with child, how would he react?

A knock on the bedchamber’s door announced Mrs Hill’s return.  “ The surgeon is down the hall with Lady Catherine, and rather than sending for Mr Jones, I requested the surgeon stop in to see you, Mrs Lizzy.”

“Thank you, Mrs Hill.  I know that Mr Jones has been at the Fairchild’s home all week, as their youngest had another episode.  I appreciate your wise decision in this matter.”

Darcy frowned.  “
What sort of episode does the child have?”

“He was in an accident when he was a small boy.  He was trapped in a burning house.  Ever since, he has breathing episodes that Mr Jones spends hours making it easier for the boy to breath.  It is worse this time of year when the air is heavier.”

“How old is the boy?” Darcy asked, trying anything to keep his mind from returning to Elizabeth’s illness.

“He is near nine now.  Mr Jones is surprised with each year that goes by, as he was quite sure that the boy would have perished years ago.”

Another knock alerted the couple to the surgeon’s arrival at their room.  “If you do not mind, Mr Darcy, I wish to speak with your wife alone before examining her.  Mrs Hill will be here momentarily to assist me with the examination.”

Reluctantly, Darcy stood and left the room.  He encountered his cousin in the hallway, as Richard was looking for the surgeon.  “Anne is quite ill this morning, though she will not admit to it.  She has a queasy stomach and the smell of my soap made her lose her breakfast.”

“Elizabeth is ill as well.  Perhaps they ate something that did not set right with them.”

Both men looked at the stairs when they heard Mrs Hill coming up to Elizabeth’s room.  Darcy stepped closer to the housekeeper.  “Mrs Hill, I am concerned that my wife and my cousin’s wife may have eaten something that was not cooked properly.  Both of the ladies have queasy stomachs and
I know that my wife is quite fatigued, even though she just woke from a night of sleep.”

“I will speak with the surgeon and express your opinion.  As soon as he is done with Mrs Lizzy, I will send him to Mrs Fitzwilliam’s room.”  Hearing the housekeeper’s statement, Richard nodded his head.

Mrs Hill was aware that many men were frightened of their wives increasing.  It was a time of great changes in a woman’s body and it was difficult for men to understand and be supportive in the way their wives needed.  Mrs Hill’s own dear husband was quite intoxicated when their children were born for he was unable to withstand hearing his wife’s cries.

Stepping to the side of the bed where Elizabeth was laying, she smiled and took hold of her dear girl’s hand.  Listening to the questions that were being asked of Elizabeth, and the answers that she was giving, Mrs Hill was becoming more and more certain of the diagnosis.  When the surgeon pronounced his same beliefs, Elizabeth burst into tears.

“Mrs Lizzy, whatever has caused these tears?  This is good news, as a babe will bring such joy.”

“My husband told me just moments ago that he dreads our begetting a child as he has had dreams of me taking ill and dying from giving birth.  He will not be pleased with the news, not at all.”

“He will come to be pleased, I am quite certain of that.  Do not fear, dear girl.  We will aid you in making him see the wonderful news for what it is.  Oh, and I believe we have another patient in the same condition down the hall.  Mr Fitzwilliam stated his wife is having a difficult time keeping her breakfast down.
  Neither of the men are aware that the condition that their wives are in, for they believe that the ladies have eaten something that did not settle well on the stomach.”

“What should we do?” Elizabeth looked extremely frightened.  “My husband was quite adamant that he fears our having children.  I am certain that he will be displeased with the news.”

“Mrs Lizzy, do not fret so.  I believe that Mr Darcy will come to be pleased with the knowledge of a babe coming from your love.  We must give him time to adjust to the notion.  And once you deliver safely, he will be calm for any further confinements you might have.”  Mrs Hill patted Elizabeth’s hand as she spoke in a motherly tone.  “Remember how Fred was worried when his Leah was with child?  And they now have five children.  He loves each and every one of them.”

Tears were welling up in Elizabeth’s eyes as she listened to Mrs Hill.  “I only wish that William can be as pleased with the news as I am.  I am thrilled to know that we will have a babe.  A life, growing inside of me that was created by my love for my husband.”

“That is the way it should be, Mrs Darcy.” The surgeon told her as he stood to leave.  “I will go now to check on Mrs Fitzwilliam before I take my leave.  I will only tell your husband that you are sound and healthy, and that the queasiness will subside.  You will speak to him on the possibility of your
increasing;
I will not speak of the matter to him unless he has questions after you tell him the news.  I do not see any impediment to your delivering a healthy child without trouble.  You are healthy and strong, all should be well.  And as to the trouble your mother had which led to her death, as you have said, she took a terrible fall and the injury is what took her and the babe’s life, not the
confinement itself.”

“Thank you, Sir.  Will you be returning soon to check on Lady Catherine?” Elizabeth wished to change the subject. 

“I believe I will be back in two days, and if the lady continues to improve as she has, she should be able to be out of bed for several hours at a time.  She will need to t
ake things slowly and carefully;
otherwise, I see no difficulties in a full recovery very soon.”

“That is truly a relief to hear.” Mrs Hill stated.  “I have been fretting over those two, dear ladies that protected our dear Lizzy.  I am so very grateful for not only their defense of our girl, but that they will soon recover.”

Chapter 27

After the surgeon had left Longbourn, both Richard and Darcy went to their wives.  Anne, having learned of her cousin’s fear of Elizabeth increasing, knew that she would need to speak with her husband to keep their news from Darcy for a while, until Elizabeth was able to convince him that the news was indeed good.
  Being somewhat frightened with the news of his wife’s condition, Richard was able to understand his cousin’s feelings.  He thought it might be best if he were to have a chat with Darcy and discuss their fears for their wives.  They had been able to speak of their joys at being married, it was only right that they now discuss their trepidation.

When Darcy returned to his wife’s side, she could see the worried look on his face. 
“Please, dearest, there is nothing to worry over.  I will be fine. 

“I do not believe the surgeon thoroughly investigated the situation.  Perhaps it would be best to send for another physician, one that specializes in ladies illnesses.”

“William, that is not necessary.  Now, if you will assist me in dressing, I wish to see your mother and spend some time speaking with her.  Jane will be e
xtremely busy with plans for
her wedding
.  And from what I discovered this morning, it may be a double wedding as well.”

“Double?” Darcy looked at his wife with confusion.  “Who else is marrying?”

“My brother; he finally got around to asking my friend, Charlotte Lucas, to marry him.  Jane and I have known of his favoring her for several years.  I could not be more pleased for him.”

“That is indeed good news, Lizzy.  Please, my dearest love, do not place your health in jeopardy though.”  Darcy looked into his wife’s eyes.

“I promise you
that I will refrain from
any misdeeds.  And, with your mother and my sister nearby, not to mention my dear friend, I will be kept from mischief by all of them.”

An hour later, Darcy made his way to his mother’s room.  “William, it is a pleasure to see you.  How is Lizzy? I heard she was ill earlier.”

“She was ill with a queasy stomach.  I have been assured that it will pass and that she is well.”

Lady Anne could see that something else was weighing heavy on her son’s mind.  “What is wrong, William?”

Giving his mother a slight smile, Darcy walked over to the window to look outside.  “You have always known me, Mother.  I have never been able to hide anything from you.”

“Nor should you hide your feelings from me.  What has happened?”  Lady Anne held out her hand to her son when he turned around.

“Mother, I have told you time and again about the dreams
I have had over the past years,
especially those pertaining to my wife.”  Seeing his mother nod, Darcy continued.  “I have not told you of the nightmares of losing Elizabeth.  The nightmares are of my wife becoming heavy with child and then dying when giving birth.”

With a knowing look, Lady Anne squeezed her son’s hand.  “And now you are afraid of Elizabeth having children?”  Darcy nodded his head.  “William, you know it is a natural course in a marriage.  Children are a blessing.  Do not throw away your happiness over these nightmares.  Elizabeth is strong and
healthy;
there is no reason to believe that she would not be able to survive giving birth to your children.”

“
You nearly died from birthing Georgiana.  Grandmother died shortly after giving birth.  How am I not to fear this could happen to my wife?  Her own mother died in childbirth.  I must find a way to prevent this from happening.”

“This is foolis
hness.
Y
ou are allowing your fears to control your actions.  Your grandmother had a weak heart before giving birth, and she had been told not to attempt to carry another child.  I had suffered from a fever for a week before giving birth, so I was in a weakened state.  And I believe that Mrs Bennet had suffered a fall which led to her death.  Elizabeth is not like any of us.  She is strong and capable.  She will be able to carry with no problem, I am quite sure of that.”  Lady Anne took hold of her son’s hand and brought it to her cheek.  “My dear boy, I cannot begin to tell you just how much it means to me to have you and Georgiana.  My life would be empty without you. Do not deny the same joy for yourself and Lizzy.  It is the greatest joy you will ever know.”