Immortal Darkness (Phantom Diaries #3) (10 page)

Through the passage of sleep, his voice, his words were transplanted to Eric’s lips and I smiled.

“I’ll not make the same mistake as Rupert.  He abandoned Kristine, but I will remain at your side, always, Annette. I’m a patient man. I’ll bide my time, but I will do so at close quarters.” His fingers tightened around mine. “I won’t let you out of my sight if I can help it.”

Chap
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er 8

S
tanding before the full length mirror, I stared at my reflection as Kim, a young seamstress, made a few adjustments on my gown. It was beautiful, fit for a queen, with regal pleats, dense crinolines and a plunging neckline.

“You look absolute magnificent,” Kim said.  “This shade of green is perfect on your skin. I think this is my favorite of all the gowns so far.”

I nodded my agreement.  The dark satin, as green as the finest emerald, clung to my breasts and waist before billowing out so wide, it was impossible to pass through the doorway.

“How am I ever going to manage to get around in this thing?”

“The stage director said you’d have to slip in on backstage.”

My eyes danced over the shimmering folds of fabric.  Though it was cumbersome and surprisingly heavy, it did look great. I took in a long breath and let it slowly seep out. My breasts heaved above the satin, just about ready to burst out.

“Will I be able to sing in this?” I asked.  “I mean, without having one of the girls pop out?”

Kim’s eyes widened with shock and amusement.  “I could tighten it a bit.”

“I hardly see how you could make this any tighter,” I remarked.  “Is there any way you can add a length of lace to give me more coverage?”

She shook her head.  “The design of this dress is to truly highlight the female figure. Besides, Mr. Aragon has made it clear. He wants this daring neckline to remain. This gown is to be the jewel of the entire show and he doesn’t want the slightest alteration for the original design.”

When finished with pinning and measuring, Kim helped me out the exquisite gown and pulled out a sheer sheath.

“What’s that?”

“I believe it’s for your moonlit scene in the garden.  The one with blood on your hands.”

Frowning, I took it from her hands and held it up to the light.  “This is completely transparent.”

“The scene calls for lights to be dim. The audience won’t be able to see through it as much as you think.”

I shot her a skeptical glance.

“I’m going to have to take the corset off you,” she said as she directed me to turn my back to her.

“You mean I don’t even have a corset to conceal myself?”

A moment of panic shook me. How could I possible go out on stage so exposed? With hundreds of people watching it would be impossible for me to concentrate on the song, on the scene. Surely my mind would be cemented on the fact I was virtually standing there in the nude.

Kim removed my corset and pulled the sheath over my head.  The moment the fabric touched my skin, my bare breasts, the panic subsided and I was filled with the same passion I was certain Kristine had felt when she’d worn such a garment.

It was luxurious in its translucence, gentle in its way of flowing so quietly, so unobtrusively over my body.

“Not as bad as you thought, is it?” Kim stood behind me, admiring my reflection for a moment before turning away. “I’ll leave you a moment to reconcile with this new side of your character and go see if there’s anything else that you need to try on.”

“I guess I can get used to this,” I whispered once she’d closed the door behind her. I smiled at the brazen woman in the mirror. In my eyes, in the curve of my lips and in the provocative pose my body took, I could see Kristine.

Seemed she was cropping up a lot lately.  On numerous occasions, both Aaron and Chace had suspected me of being taken over by Kristine again.

Despite their fears I felt in complete control.  I was playing Kristine in this opera, but I would not allow her to take over as she had before. 

“Seems I always catch you in some state of undress these days.”

I turned to face Chace. Standing at the door, he was red in the face. 

Letting out a soft chuckle, I approached him.  “Of course if you're going to persist to barge into my dressing room you run the risk of seeing more of me than you might have expected.”

“Look at you. You walked right to me, practically naked and you show no sign of scruples.  What’s gotten into you lately?”

“Don’t start up with the Kristine thing again, Chace. This is part of the show, you know that.  I have to work at getting into this character. She’s so far removed from who I am, if I don’t convince myself, prove to myself that I can be as wanton and sexual as Kristine was, I won’t have a good performance. I’m already heading into this production with people’s pure white opinion of me.  I have to heat it up a bit.  Let them see this other side of me.”

“No, this is more than just your way of getting into character.”

“Please don’t make me feel ashamed of this new woman who is emerging.  I’m not saying I want to go out and roam the streets of New York dressed like this, but at least let me feel the sensuality of this character without making me feel bad about it.”

“This is all Aaron’s doing.  He’s the one who put this into your head. He’s the one who insists you wear costumes that are more than daring.  I knew I shouldn’t have let you go to Paris with him.”

“Chace, don’t say that.  I went to Paris of my own free will.  You had no say in the matter.”

I saw the pained expression on his face and regretted my words, true as they were.  Reaching for his hand, I gazed into his eyes, so soft and trusting, so lost in love.

“If he’s turning you into Kristine,” he muttered huskily. “What are you turning me into?”  He put his hand to my waist, tentative and unsure, but with heated desire.

Licking his lips he took a step closer while his eyes darkened and narrowed.  “What are you turning me into?” he said again with longing. His gaze dipped down to my breasts and a sharp intake of breath shook him. “You're so beautiful, Annette. I don’t even know how I should respond to you when you're like this.  I want to protect and preserve the Annette I met, the sweet and innocent girl who arrived in New York with wide eyes and great dreams.  But I’m just a man…”

His hands travelled up my back then down to my buttocks.

“There’s only so much controlling of my urges I can accomplish.  What you're asking of me now, to be with you, to see you like this, so open and ready, so willing, all while remaining frigid and aloof; it’s impossible.”

He pulled me into his arms, his hands and fingers working over the flimsy fabric with feverish movements.  He was at times heated and passionate at other times awkward and unsure.  Either way, he pulled me into his kisses, into his warm embrace and I wanted to lose myself in his hold.  He was like the childhood friend I’d known all my life, the friend I’d trusted and felt so at ease with, had so much fun with.

And now, we wanted to discover other possible avenues for our relationship to take.

As our passionate embrace brought us further into the dressing room, as he clumsily led me to the sofa, I got a glimpse of us in the mirror and immediately saw the wanton beast Kristine had been.  My eyes were narrowed with lust, my back arched as I pressed my breasts to Chace’s chest and my hands clawed their way up his biceps and over his shoulder.

The sight shocked me and I pushed Chace back.  “Stop.  We can’t do this.  Not here.  Not like this.”

He persisted, keeping a tight hold of me.  “You can’t stir me up the way you do and let me down cold.”

“Chace, I’m not kidding.”  I pulled free and ran my hand nervously through my hair.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to let things get so out of control.”

“I could feel it in your kiss, Annette, how much you want me.  You want this as much as I do.”

He reached out for me, but I backed away, avoiding his touch.  “I don’t know what I want,” I snapped.

That zapped the passion and lust from his eyes.  Confused, he glanced away.  “Are you turning me down because you're staying with Aaron? Is there more going on between you two than you're telling me?”

“No. Nothing is going on.”  I was angry at myself for allowing this to happen and I let that anger out on Chace.  I couldn’t let Kristine take over again, in body or in spirit.

Chace clenched his fist, his own anger rising.  “I’ll bet he’s even holding the production over your head.  Has he threatened to cast someone else in the role if you don’t do as he says?”

“You make him sound like a monster, Chace.  That’s not who he is.  He’s been nothing but kind and generous. Please stop turning this into something it’s not.”

“Then why did you push me away?  Why can’t I get close to you?”

I turned away and saw the seminude reflection of myself. “I’m going to have other costumes to try on, Chace. Can we talk about all this later?”

His fists slackened and I caught the dejected shrug of his shoulder. “Fine,” he muttered softly.  “Look, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to put any pressure on you. I know I’m overreacting, just like I did when I saw Aaron in your apartment; when I smashed my violin on his head.  Emotions aren’t always so easy to contain, and I guess you bring out a whole band of emotions I’m not used to dealing with.”

“I’m not mad, Chace,” I said, softening my tone as I turned to him.  “I’m just as confused about all this as you are.”

I looked at him, trying to ignore the power Kristine still had on all of us.  She was slowly seeping back into my life, and she was toying with every man who entered my life.

“You know what,” I said with a strong desire to regain control.  “Forget about the other costumes I’m supposed to try on.  Why don’t we go out and grab ourselves a few pretzels then head out to the park to feed whatever ducks dared to winter here.”

The sad confusion remained on his face for a startled moment, but then slowly lit up as my invitation struck him.  “I think that would be great.”

He stepped out while I changed into my jeans and sweater.

I was happy with the outcome.  Loath to have anything ruin our relationship, it was good to see he wanted to maintain our friendship as much as I did.  After all, he was the first true friend I’d had in New York and I wanted to make sure he would be a friend I’d have for a long time.

Chap
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9

A
fter a few more fittings, Aaron arrived to take me home.  The routine we’d fallen into was both comfortable and disconcerting. It became increasingly easy to be with him and I felt at home in his less than cozy apartment, but it all left me questioning what he expected from all this.

He parked his car in his reserved spot and popped the trunk open. With a secretive grin on his face he got out of the car and headed to the trunk.

The little girl in me emerged; he had a surprise for me and I was thrilled at the notion.

“What do you have there?” I said as I came around to glance in the trunk.

He pulled out four hefty grocery bags.  “Dinner… for two.”

I tried not to grimace as I followed him to the elevator.  “I thought you didn’t know how to cook.”