Imperative: Volume 2, A Tale of Pride and Prejudice (71 page)

“Good heavens, no!  Mrs. Gardiner would throttle me!”  He laughed.  “But she is older, much older than Lizzy.  I doubt that we will have many more.  After all, I had to wait to marry, and fortunately, my wife waited for me.  That overwhelming feeling you speak of was somewhat tamed for us by then.”  The glare he received was searing.  “I am sorry; I do not mean to laugh.  I realize how difficult it is to speak of such things to anyone, let alone a stranger.  Then again, it may be easier.”

“I want a house full of children.”  Darcy said softly.  “I want the halls to ring with their voices.  I want to work at that desk and hear Lizzy calling to them to behave so that I can have some peace.”  He looked up and smiled a little.  “I want to see her surrounded by them and reading a story, or playing a game out on the grounds . . . or just holding them.  I want to have to fight them off to get to her for a little time of my own.”  He looked out of the window to the garden.  “A great deal of time . . .”

“You look forward to sending them off to sleep already?  I have every confidence that you will have a very efficient governess.”  Mr. Gardiner chuckled. 

“I have imagined so many things.  My image of the future with Elizabeth is one of the things that helped me to survive this nightmare.”  Finally settling into a chair, he rubbed his face.  “It will come.”

“It will.”  Mr. Gardiner sat forward and met his eye.  “It
will
.”

“But your sister, Mrs. Philips, she had no children.”

“True, but Elizabeth’s mother had five, and I have four.  I would say that the Gardiner side of the family has done well.  Perhaps the problem for my sister is in Mr. Philips.” 

“Mr. Philips?”  Darcy considered the question.  “I suppose that is possible.” 

“I realize it is highly unlikely.  But returning to Lizzy, considering the terrible pressures you have experienced constantly, just marrying was hard enough, but the accident, her father’s illness and death, and then this time with Miss Darcy . . .”

“I say the same to myself all of the time.”  He paused and said softly, “We suspect that she lost a child, well, we do not speak of it, but it is in our minds.  Elizabeth is . . . I think . . . I know that she worries.”

“Well,” Mr. Gardiner looked around the study and then nodded to the landscape of Pemberley hanging on the wall, “she has reason to.” 

Darcy followed his gaze and nodding, looked down at the floor.  “Has she said, in her letters . . . Any complaint of me?”  He looked up to find Mr. Gardiner smiling again.  “I am such a fool.”

“Of course you are.  Do you know her chief complaint of you?” 

“No, sir.”  He whispered and stared.

“Nothing she says goes over your head.”  Darcy’s mouth dropped open.  “My niece has enjoyed the company of an entire neighbourhood all of her life and only her father had an inkling of what she was saying.  And here you are and she cannot say a thing that you do not receive with at least a “raised brow.”  I think was her phrase.  My niece is forced to step up her game to keep up with you.   She says that it is exhausting.” 

A slow smile spread over Darcy’s face.  “Is that so?”

“I should not have told you.”

“I . . . No you should have told me to mind my business, but . . . thank you.”  Sitting back in his chair, he chuckled and grinned.  “I love that!” 

“She says you are a bit vain, too.”

Darcy shrugged.  “I do that for her.”

“I thought so.” 

Picking up his glass, Darcy smiled.  “How do you like your wine?”

“It is nearly as good as mine.”  Mr. Gardiner winked.

Darcy raised one brow and nodding, took a sip.  “I thought so.” 

“I THOUGHT THAT it was very peaceful.”  Mrs. Gardiner looped her arm with Elizabeth’s and they walked through the house together.  “He was ready.”

“But I was not there.”  Elizabeth said softly.

“You made that decision together, Lizzy.  You said your goodbyes.  He accepted it.” 

“No, he did not, but he knew that I was serious.  Of course, I was serious because I had a secret to keep.  But Jane . . . I am sure that she did not mean to make me feel terrible, and I . . . I can only imagine how difficult it was watching him decline and trying to keep Mama calm, and the family in order . . .  How could she not resent me?  I was carefree, on a honeymoon in Scotland.”  She sighed. 

“If you could have been there, I know that you would.”

“I do not know that, Aunt.  I knew everything by then.  Oh, I do not know anymore.”  Elizabeth glanced at her and ahead.  They entered the gallery and walked past the Darcy ancestors.  “We could have come, Fitzwilliam’s aunt and uncle could have gone to Sommerwald, Fitzwilliam even offered to take me when the colonel arrived, but we did not belong at Longbourn, did we?”

“Are you seeking forgiveness?  Do you feel guilt, Lizzy?  I hope not.  You were where you belonged.  Nobody knows what you have been living since . . . how long did you know?  Did Fitzwilliam tell you when he proposed?”

“Yes and no.  He asked me to save his life.”  Elizabeth stopped before Darcy’s portrait and wiped the blur from her eyes. 

“Oh, Lizzy.”  Mrs. Gardiner hugged her and the two women looked up at the man with the slight smile.  “He is such a handsome man.  There is something pleasant about his mouth when he speaks, I think.”

“Not only when he speaks.”  Elizabeth hugged herself and looking away from the portrait, her hand went to her mouth, “Did I say that out loud?”

Her aunt laughed, “I am afraid so, dear.  I am very happy for you both.” 

DARCY LOOKED into Elizabeth’s dressing room.  She was just putting the stopper on her bottle of lotion and rubbing the last of it into her hands.  She looked up when she felt his stomach behind her head.  “I was just coming, could you not wait for me?”

“mmm no.”  He gave her shoulders a squeeze and looking around the room, picked up a morning dress that had been set out for the wash.  “Come, slip this on.”

“On?”  Elizabeth stood and laughed.  “I just undressed!”

“All you need is this.”  He tugged at her nightdress and grinned.

“What are you about, Mr. Darcy?”

“You will see.” 

“But I was preparing to argue with you!”

“Smelling off roses?  I think not.”  Determinedly he lifted up the nightdress and sighing at the nude woman before him, slipped the gown over her.  “There, now some slippers . . .” Biting his lip, he spotted a pair.

“Where are we going?”

“For a walk.”  He knelt and touched her foot.

“Will!  I cannot go walking in these!”  She watched as he put them on.

“Why not?  I have seen you walk all over the house in these.”

“
In
the house is the operative word.”

“Is this the best argument you can manage, love?  If so, you are truly off your game tonight.

“Forgive me, it is midnight and I have been entertaining guests for hours.”  She sighed and watched him slip on the other shoe.  “You are not to be stopped are you?”

“No.”  Grinning, he took her hand and kissed her.  “You are lovely.” 

“I am not stepping out of this room dressed like this!”

“Have you no comment for my attire?”  Darcy stood away from her and held out his arms.

“Your attire . . .”  She gasped and reached to touch his breeches.  “Oh Will, those are the terrible breeches I made!”

“Come, love.” 

“Are you wearing anything under those?”

Darcy looked down and back up to her.  “What do you think?”

“I think that you are fully on display.”  She said admiringly and touched the growing bulge beneath the thin fabric.

“Not quite yet.”  Darcy kissed her cheek and taking her hand, he led her to the hallway door.  Peeking out, he looked left, then right, and then gave her hand a tug.  “Come!”

“Will!”  Elizabeth squealed as he hurried down the hallway.

“Shhhhh!” 

MR. GARDINER STOPPED tying his nightshirt and listening to the muffled laughter and running feet, he turned and saw his wife staring at the closed door from their bed.  “If this was home, I would be commenting about how much the children have grown.”  He climbed into the bed and pulled the covers over his legs.  “But we are not at home.”

“What gave that away?”  Mrs Gardiner looked around the room as he laughed.  “Did you and he talk about Mr. Bennet?”

“Oh yes.  Yes, Darcy was quite concerned about our opinions of his last days, how he was treated, and how he behaved towards everyone.  Did you know that he keeps a regular correspondence with Collins?”

“No, Lizzy did not say anything, but then she was worried about Jane.  She carries guilt for her absence, even though she does not admit to it.”

“Jane did well through all of it, and I am glad that Elizabeth was not there.  You know that if she had been, she would have taken over.”

“
That
is what everyone wanted.”  Mrs. Gardiner nodded.  “I told Lizzy that by her not being there, the others were forced to see what sort of mettle they had.  And Jane learned that she had quite a good husband.   He was supporting to the end, and when he felt that she had done enough, he took her away.”

“He took her away before my sister established a routine of spending her time at Netherfield.  Mr. Bingley is not a fool, despite his easy nature.” 

“No, he is not.”    They fell into silence for a few moments.

“Darcy . . . I actually felt like an uncle to him today.  He needed to talk; he needed to hear that he was right with his decisions for his sister, and needed to crow a bit about his love for Elizabeth.  It felt good that he trusted me.”

“I knew that he would, he just needed to know you.”  Mrs. Gardiner kissed his cheek.  “Did he speak much of Miss Darcy?”

“No.  I do not expect him to, the secret is too deep.  But his feelings of disappointment mixed with hope and fear were palpable.”  Mr. Gardiner considered his conversation.  “Actually, he said very little at all.  I think that he felt relief simply finding a mature male who he could trust with some very personal thoughts.”  He smiled and Mrs. Gardiner held his hand.  “I hope that he has his family soon.” 

“Well, if those running feet were any indication, he is intent on working on it.”  Mrs. Gardiner laughed when her husband raised his brows.   “Oh dear, are you intent as well?”

“How does five sound to you?”  He grinned, and turning, blew out the candle.  “Come here, Mrs. Gardiner.”

“STARGAZING.”  Elizabeth lifted her head from Darcy’s chest and saw his smile.  She touched his mouth, swollen from endless kisses, and settled back into his arms.  “I was sure that you were taking me to the lake.”

“It crossed my mind, but I wanted to relax you.”  He felt her hand tracing gently over his thigh and sighed happily, “It seems that you want to relax me, too.”

He heard the smile in her voice as her fingers tiptoed up his stomach.  “You could not manage that in our bed?” 

“Of course I could, but this is . . .  I wanted to take you away somewhere.  And then it occurred to me that at night, looking up at the sky . . . no matter where we were we would see exactly this.”  Letting go of her shoulder, he waved his hand at the starlit sky.  “We could be anywhere right now.  Where would you like to go, dearest?  Shall we imagine we are somewhere new?” 

“Silly man.” 

“Tell me.”  Elizabeth kissed him, pausing to caress his face and smile into his soft eyes.  “Where may I take you, love?”

“What makes you think that I want to be anywhere but right here?” 

Slipping his hand behind her head he brushed his lips over her face, pressing kisses to her eyes, her cheeks, her nose . . .  She sighed as his mouth found hers again and they rolled so that he lay above, never breaking the kiss.

  “Lizzy . . .”  He moaned against her lips when he felt Elizabeth’s warm hands drawing down his breeches as their tongues slid and explored, deepening the kiss with every stroke of their mouths.  Darcy broke away to taste her throat, and then to nuzzle and suckle her breasts beneath her gown.  Elizabeth gasped with the feel of his warm breath and the rough tug of the damp fabric dragging across her nipples.  Licking his lips, he lifted her skirt and then returning his gaze to her face, watched her eyes as he slowly sank into her.  The gasp, the moan, the feel of her warm welcoming body receiving him, the look in her eyes . . . all of it, only heightened his desire to make her his again.  “Sweet Lizzy . . .”  He whispered as they moved together.  “Sweet, sweet, Lizzy.” 

“Willlll . . .”  Elizabeth sighed, opening herself to him as much as she could.  Darcy pushed up  on his hands so that his hair hung down, brushing against her forehead as he moved.  Elizabeth was not satisfied with that, she wanted his mouth and reached to pull his head down.  “Come here,” She commanded.  “Do not hide those lips from me.” 

“I just wanted to look in your eyes.”  Darcy laughed against her mouth as she drew him back into her arms and they rocked slowly, kissing once again.  “Sweet Lizzy . . .”  He sighed, dragging his mouth to her throat and drinking in her scent.  “My Elizabeth Rose.”

 Her head tilted back, she caressed her hands over his shoulders and back and sighed, “You asked where you could take me . . .”

“Anywhere . . .  I want you to be happy with me, happy and sure of me and my love . . . It is only for you.”  Darcy moaned when she lifted her legs and wrapped them around his waist.  He slid in so deeply.  “Ohhhh, Lizzy . . .”   

“I
am
sure, sweetheart.  My love is only yours, too.”  He lifted his head to see her warm, loving eyes.  “So wherever you take me, the view would be the same.”  Elizabeth smiled and caressed his face. “This is all I need to see.”  

Chapter 27

“W
ell then?  What is the result of the Season?  I read no announcements in the papers.  I assume that I would have received a letter had there been news.”  Lady Catherine took up her glass of sherry and addressed her niece.  “Do not tell me you have wasted another?  What are you waiting for?”