In All of Infinity (7 page)

“So
this
is where you live?”

Reverie turned quickly and saw Isaac walking
towards her, his hands in his pockets. The twin Brevard girls were
seated in his car, giggling about something. They had no doubt been
the ones who’d told him where she lived. She didn’t know if she
should hate them for all eternity or thank them for bringing him
back into her life so soon. For some reason, he was very intriguing
and she found herself pulled to him, almost as if he were the sun
and she was the earth. Or was it reverse? With the way he looked at
her, she couldn’t find that hard to believe.

“Nice place,” he said and looked at the
house, his hands in his pockets. “It’s really…” he looked at her
and smiled sincerely “…beautiful.”

“Why are you here?” Reverie asked and made
her way down the steps. When she was inches from him, she stopped
and looked at the twins who remained in the car, giggling. She
began wondering if she were going to regret his finding out where
she lived.

“I came to apologize. I’m a jerk sometimes
and I know it. Will you forgive me?” he asked and stopped smiling.
“Please?”

Reverie looked at him, wondering why he was
apologizing. He hadn’t done anything wrong. Was he trying to make
her realize that she’d been the one who needed to ask for
forgiveness by playing innocent? She didn’t know him well enough to
know his intentions, and began thinking she was like her father in
that way as well: disconnected from others.

“Tell the twins I’ll see them tomorrow,” she
said and started back up the steps.

She looked at the front door, wanting
desperately to take refuge inside. The furniture wouldn’t make her
question herself, her chores wouldn’t, nor would her homework.
Wasn’t she the jerk? Hadn’t she been the one who’d been angry with
him for trying to help? Hadn’t she? What about today at lunch? He
was trying to start a conversation and she had been distant,
wanting to be alone.

When she reached the porch, she turned and
stared at Isaac’s back as he made his way to his car, his hands
remaining in his pockets. He’d tried to placate the situation, but
had been unsuccessful.

“Isaac?” she called.

He looked over his shoulder before turning
completely, knowing what she was about to say. He fought the smile
that threatened to come to his face, realizing how serious she was.
He merely said, “Reverie?”

“I will see you tomorrow as well, if that’s
ok?” she asked, not making eye contact. She gulped and looked at
him, a small smile reaching her face. “I mean, is that ok? I am the
one who should apologize, and I do…apologize. I know you think that
I was rude today. I’m sorry if you think that’s the case. I tend to
be the…way that I was…today.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said and smiled
brightly. At the back of his mind, he couldn’t help thinking how
perfect she was today, just by being herself.

“Good day,” she said and walked towards the
door.

He laughed slightly, realizing how good his
day had been, and how wonderful tomorrow would be. When he got back
in the car, he realized the twins were giggling still, staring at
him. There was something they weren’t telling him, but nothing
could affect him right now. With the image of Reverie’s beautiful
innocence in his mind, he started the car and backed away, wishing
he had known who lived in this old house before today. He couldn’t
help thinking that today was the most wonderful day of his life,
and that there would be more days to come.

***

“How was your first day?”

Reverie looked across the table at her
father, wishing she could tell him about Isaac. He wouldn’t take to
her liking someone who was so completely unlike them. She blinked
and wondered if she had amorous feelings for him, but knew
instantly it was because she’d made a friend. As a matter of fact,
he was her very first friend who was a boy and not a girl. She was
thrilled.

“I have tons of homework,” she answered and
took a bite of collard greens. Although she was the cook of the
family, trying to make them both live healthy lives, she was
getting tired of eating greens. “I wasn’t much for the outfit they
had us wear, really. I also met a few people. I mean, you know,
other than teachers.”

Emmanuel raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

He remembered seeing her change of clothes
when he’d stepped into the house only an hour ago, almost found
them comical. She was dressed in an old pair of dungarees, a white
blouse, and a black pair of lace-up oxford shoes. Despite this, she
hadn’t mentioned anything about meeting anyone. He realized she
must have met someone, surely, but she usually stated the names of
those she met. Not doing so made him wonder who.

Reverie knew he was trying to prolong the
conversation, but she wasn’t in the mood. She looked at the fork
heavy with greens and felt like vomiting. Since they were sitting
in lantern light, she knew he could hardly see her to tell what was
on her mind.

“Virginia came by today,” she said for the
millionth time. When he’d come in today, this fact was what she had
revealed to him first. He had merely nodded. “What did the paper
say?”

Reverie stared across at
him, but couldn’t make out his face anymore than he could hers. She
sighed in exasperation. He wasn’t in the mood to talk tonight…at
least, not about what was going on with him. She was familiar with
this part of him, attempting to find some normalcy after a hectic
day. If he knew his daughter at all, he would realize she was
anything
but
normal.

“How was work?”

Emmanuel didn’t answer the question, merely
mumbled and dismissed himself from the table. She rolled her eyes
and continued eating her greens, reaching out to pull the lantern
closer to her. If there had ever been someone born to read, it was
Reverie Reagan. Seeing her without something recreational to read
was very rare, as her father often said when they went out, and she
had the animal book tonight. She hadn’t read as much as she’d
planned to read.

“What’s your fascination with animals?”

Hearing her father’s voice again so suddenly
made her jump. She looked beyond the lantern light, saw his
silhouette in the doorway.

“I love animals,” she answered simply,
returning to her book, “just as you love Virginia.”

He didn’t respond for a second. Although she
didn’t look up, she figured he had left her alone. He did that when
he didn’t know how to respond back.

“You are too young to know of love,” he
answered assertively. “You are just beginning high school. Wait
until you are older before you can say what love is.”

Before she could look up and respond, he
disappeared again, leaving her to ponder his last statement. She
waited for his return but he never did, so she closed her book and
went about doing her chores. Emmanuel didn’t seem to know as much
about love as he thought he did. As a matter of fact, he thought
that her affections for Clark Gable were genuine, but she knew that
would never be the case. After all, the actor who portrayed the
swashbuckling Fletcher Christian didn’t know she existed. Or was
her father merely fooling around? It was hard to tell
sometimes.

When she finished washing the dishes, she
blew out the lantern, picked up her book, and stepped out of the
kitchen. It had been a long day, but it was only minutes after
seven, so she knew it was far from over. She planned to study until
nine or so, reading by the lantern in her room. After spotting her
father, who sat in the living room with the only light coming from
his cigarette, she began making her way upstairs.

“I’m going to have to buy eyeglasses for you
one of these days,” had become Emmanuel’s final words to her each
day since she was eight. He didn’t bid her good night and tuck her
in, always lacking the genteel approach for a parent. There were
times Reverie wished he would, but she didn’t feel that way
anymore. She was independent, almost, and couldn’t imagine being
anything but.

Before she could reach her room, she heard
scurrying in the attic. She paused. The attic was the only room she
had always been kept from, but that didn’t mean she didn’t think
about going there. When she was outside looking up, she often tried
gazing into the room via the window but had never been able to see
anything. It was the largest room in the house, spanning the space
of the rooms beneath it, which Reverie doubted was a familiar trait
with Victorian architecture. Hearing the noise, she walked in the
gathering darkness towards the inaccessible room. Just as she
reached it, the scurrying stopped.

Reverie stepped closer and pressed her ear
to the door, breathing calmly. She heard the opposite on the other
side. Whoever was standing there, taking refuge in the attic, was
gasping harshly. She jumped away, fetched a candle from the nearby
stand in the hallway, and lit it immediately.

“Who’s there?”

She spotted something coming from beneath
the door and jumped back when it slid across the floor. Looking
hard, she realized that it was a key. It was dirty because it
hadn’t been used in a long time. As she bent down to get it, she
heard banging on the door.

“No! No!” the voice wailed plaintively. “No!
Give it back!”

Reverie didn’t know how to react and stood
staring from the door to the key and back again. The banging
continued and the voice, now inaudible, was only sobbing. As she
was bending down to retrieve the key, she heard someone coming up
behind her. The footsteps became all she heard and the crying and
banging stopped, causing her to focus on whoever was approaching.
She stood up straight and turned around, backing up so that her
foot was on the key. Standing at the end of the hall with a candle
much like hers, Emmanuel stared at her with what she could only
assume was rage.

“What are you doing here?” he asked
furiously. “You know the attic is forbidden!”

She gulped, unable to say anything for a
second. As he approached, she began wondering if she had been the
only one to hear the creature in the attic. He stood in front of
her, checking the doorknob to make sure the attic was still locked,
and then grabbed hold of her wrist.

“You, young lady, are in serious trouble!”
he stated.

With eyes still full of fury, he realized he
wasn’t threatening in the slightest. He had never lost his anger
with her, often thought she was his gift from Heaven, but tonight
was different. He had to show her he was serious, outraged, but he
couldn’t find it in himself to do it. She looked so innocent.

“What? For being curious?” she asked,
stammering. “I’ve been here several times before, but you never
said anything. If just being here makes you put me in serious
trouble, I’ll never come here again.”

“Of course you won’t, Reverie. You’re
grounded,” he said calmly. He glanced at the door, away from her
eyes. They were her mother’s eyes, always serene and able to calm
him no matter what mood he was in.

“That’s not fair,” she whined. She couldn’t
understand why he was so angry, and it hurt her more that she
probably never would. He never explained himself, never had to, and
she was always going to be the one to blame. “I didn’t do
anything.”

“Life’s not fair,” he said absently before
turning to her. “Life’s never fair. Go to your room, to your
studies. I don’t want to hear another word from you tonight.”

“Fine!” she exclaimed, throwing her nose
into the air indignantly. As she placed the candle on the table to
blow out the candle, she knocked the matchbox into the floor.
Although it appeared as though she was clumsy, she had committed
the act on purpose. When she picked up the box, she snatched the
key and stood up quickly. “Good night, father.”

Emmanuel caught hold of her wrist, and she
knew her ploy was wasted. He looked at her and smiled, “Sleep well,
daughter.”

She walked away, pocketing the key. Although
she was usually a well behaved child, she had lived in the cloud of
this secrecy for much too long. Tomorrow, when she was alone, she
would venture to the attic. If he caught her this time, at least he
would blame and punish her for what she was doing besides what he
assumed. She only hoped he wouldn’t catch her until after she was
finished exploring.

***

The following day went by like butter
melting into warm bread, almost as if the universe was letting the
day slip away. She wasn’t focused on her studies much, which made
her pleased that there weren’t any quizzes, and she didn’t answer
as many questions as she did the day before. The teachers looked at
her with concern, wondering if she’d slept last night, debating on
what could keep her awake. Most of them thought it was because of
something that happened between her and her father or her
excitement for starting high school and striving to be the best.
Others thought it was because of boys, particularly Isaac
Partridge, which was a rumor that was spreading around.

When lunchtime came, Reverie decided she
would eat outside. Of course, she had planned on eating outside
since this morning, when she wondered if she could handle seeing
Isaac, so her lunch was packed. She sat on the campus lawn, letting
the late summer sun cast itself down on her, reading her animal
book while she thought about what (and who) could possibly be in
the attic. Every now and then, she would look at the key on the
string around her neck to make sure it wasn’t a figment of her
imagination. It wasn’t, she knew that, but knowing it existed made
her giddy.