In the Middle of Nowhere (9 page)

I thought quickly, “… like a new video game
or something.”

James rolled his eyes. “Fine. Please move
now.”

I left my brother and grabbed my wool Pea
Coat off a chair near the front door. I still held the mail in my
hand and quickly flipped through it. Most of it was junk mail, as
usual, but one small, red envelope caught my eye. It was addressed
to me, but had no return address on the front or back and I didn’t
recognize the handwriting. I wondered who it could be from and was
just about to open it when Tessa beeped her car horn. I threw the
mail down on top of an antique side table, grabbed my scarf, put on
my coat and decided I’d open it later.

• • •

Tessa drove me to her house and pulled up
next to Jaques’s pickup.

I turned toward Tessa before climbing out.
“Are your parents home?”

“Of course not. My dad is away at some
seminar and my mom is in the city hosting some fancy luncheon.”

Living out in the boondocks, I quickly
realized that whenever anyone referred to the “city” they were
talking about Portland.

I followed Tessa inside her foyer, which was
fully decorated for Christmas. A huge, evergreen wreath, accented
with metallic gold poinsettias, hung from one wall and garland,
made up of fresh holly and bright red velvety bows, snaked up the
curvy iron banister all the way to the third floor. Electric
candles glowed softly in the windowsills. It smelled like a field
of Evergreen trees.

“Your house is decorated so beautifully,” I
commented.

Tessa continued walking toward the back of
the house. “The gardener did it.”

Tessa made her way into the kitchen and
immediately stepped into her walk-in pantry.

“You hungry?”

“No thanks. I ate,” I lied.

“What’d you eat?”

I didn’t have an answer because I remembered
I never actually did end up eating the bagel and cream cheese.
Tessa had rung the doorbell before I even took a bite.

“Actually, I guess I forgot to eat.”

Tessa peeked her head around the doorframe.
“How the hell can you forget to eat? I’m starving and there’s no
food in this place. Wanna order a pizza?”

“Sure,” I shrugged. “But I didn’t bring any
money.”

“Don’t worry, I—“ Tessa started to answer,
but her brother interrupted us, appearing out of nowhere.

“Did I hear someone say something about
pizza?” Jaques asked loudly as he entered the kitchen. He looked
cute in a navy blue sweater and tight pair of jeans.

“You wanna order some pizza with us?”

“Sure, count me in,” he said as he plopped
down on a stool at the island.

“And here.” Jaques leaned back and reached
into his pants pocket. He pulled out his wallet and threw it on top
of the island. Tens and twenties spilled out of it.

“It’s on me,” he half smiled. He seemed like
he was drunk.

“How’s it going, Willow?” he slurred.

“Good,” I said as I stood awkwardly in the
middle of the huge room.

“Come here,” he said as he patted the seat
next to him. “Come join me.”

I looked at Tessa. “Go ahead. I’m just gonna
go in the study to grab the phone book and some take-out menus. You
guys decide what you want on the pizza.”

Slowly I walked over to Jaques and he pulled
another stool out for me. Reluctantly, I sat.

“So, young lady, what brings you here?”

I didn’t want to, but I felt I had no choice
but to look Jaques in the eyes. The blueness of them was dulled by
the fact that the whites of his eyes were completely bloodshot. He
was either drunk or stoned and I was a bit unnerved considering it
was the middle of the day.

“Not much. Just gonna hang out with your
sister.”

Jaques looked around. “Where is that slutty
sister of mine, anyway?”

Just then Tessa came into the kitchen with a
phone book and a stack of menus tucked under her arm.

“Shut the fuck up, Jaques!” she yelled.

Jaques, whose eyelids were half closed at
this point, struggled to open them and mocked his only sister,
“Sorry, Tess. I thought you liked it when I called you a slut.”

With the reflexes of a wounded animal in the
wild fighting for survival, Tessa hurled the phone book and menus
at her brother. The menus flew through the air and the phone book
slammed straight into his stomach. Jaques was so wasted he barely
flinched.

“Why don’t you go back in your drug cave and
curl up and die?” she hissed at him.

Jaques pushed the phone book onto the floor.
“Chill out, dude.”

Tessa pointed down the back hallway from
where Jaques had come. “Go, Jaques. Get outta here. Now!” she
screamed.

Jaques stood, uneasy on his feet at first,
got his balance and slowly sauntered away.

I looked at Tessa. She rolled her eyes. I was
alarmed by this interaction. Apparently she wasn’t.

“Remember you were afraid for me to drive you
home last time and I told you it was better than having my loser
brother do it.”

Tessa bent down, picked up the phone book and
menus and placed them on top of the counter. She shot me a look, as
if to say, “I told you so.”

She chose a menu and opened it up. “So? What
do you want on your pizza?”

CHAPTER
THIRTEEN

I was finally turning sixteen on the
sixteenth of January. My dad had always said that that was going to
be my “special” birthday celebration. His birthday was March
seventh, so his special birthday, he felt, occurred when he turned
seven on the seventh.

He thought mine was much more exciting
because I would be older and could appreciate the specialty of it
even more. He would always joke, too, that he hoped I’d abide by
the old saying, “sixteen and never been kissed.” My dad had told me
time and time again that no man would ever be good enough for me,
his little princess.

My sixteenth birthday was the very next day
and I definitely achieved my dad’s hope of never being kissed, but
it wasn’t necessarily my dream. Even so, I would have settled for
“never, ever been kissed” just to have my dad around to celebrate
my birthdays with me.

I tried not to make a big deal about my
birthday, but I was very excited on the inside. It fell on a
Saturday, so I was bummed that I wouldn’t be in school hanging out
with my friends.

Plus, I wasn’t going to be able to get my
driver’s permit until the DMV opened back up on Monday, if my mom
let me try and take the test at all. Even though I could have
gotten my permit at fifteen, according to Maine’s law, my mother
said there was no way she would let me drive when I was only
fifteen. She thought that even sixteen was too young for teens to
be let loose and out on the roads.

When we first moved to Pike’s, she said she
would consider letting me get my permit when I turned sixteen, but
when I asked her right after Christmas, she changed her tune.

“In order to drive, Willow, you have to
exhibit responsibility and after the way you left your brother home
alone during the break, I’m not sure you’re ready for any kind of
responsibility, especially getting behind the wheel of a four
thousand pound, potentially deadly weapon.”

My mother was so over-dramatic. I had no
comeback. How was I to know that my mother would end her shopping
spree early and get home before me because she had a migraine?

I had only stayed at Tessa’s house for a
couple of hours. We ordered pizza, ate it and checked out people’s
MyWeb accounts on her laptop. I told her I had to get back before
my mother got home, but didn’t tell her the other reason, which was
that I wanted to leave before her brother resurfaced.

I knew I was in trouble the minute Tessa
dropped me off. My mom’s car sat in the driveway. I quietly entered
the house and closed the front door behind me. My brother was smack
dab in front of the television just like I had left him. I was
about to tiptoe upstairs to my room when my mother yelled to me
from over on the couch where she lay, a damp washcloth draped
across her forehead.

“Willow Ann Flynn!” Slowly she sat up. “Don’t
you go anywhere!”

She scolded me, not only for leaving James,
but also for forgetting to feed the cat. “Your cat!” she reminded
me.

I was grounded the rest of vacation and was
not able to meet up with Erica and Taylor after all. With nowhere
else to go, I proceeded to stay home and either read and reread my
books or surf the Internet. By the end of the week I was bored to
tears. When the weekend came, my mom was home, too. When I asked
her why she wasn’t out with Mr. Roberts, I mean, “Brian,” she said
he was off somewhere, visiting relatives.

Thinking back, it now made sense why my
mother promised me I could have the whole weekend to myself as long
as I stayed home with James during the week. Brian was going to be
gone and she wouldn’t have had anyone else to go out with. How
convenient for her, I thought. And after all that bargaining and
babysitting, I ended up being stuck inside the whole time
anyway.

But I wasn’t going to let my worthless
Christmas vacation put a damper on my special sixteenth birthday
the next day. I got up bright and early that morning to ensure that
I wouldn’t be running late for the ferry. I took extra time getting
ready, picking out a new outfit that I had gotten for Christmas and
hadn’t worn yet.

I tried to get through most of the day by
staying calm and not letting my excitement show too much. I had
made plans to go out with Erica, Taylor and two other girls from
school for my birthday later that night. No one was available on
Saturday evening, so we decided to hang out on Friday night
instead. We were going to go to a local Italian restaurant for
dinner and then to a movie afterwards.

I had planned on meeting up with Taylor and
Erica during lunch so we could finalize my birthday plans, but
neither of them showed up.

I sat at a table by myself, took a bite of my
French bread pizza and texted both of them. Where could they be?
Maybe they were in the library. I ate and waited, but no texts ever
came back.

I looked around for the two other girls we
were going to go with, Victoria and Megan, but I quickly remembered
that neither of them was in our lunch wave.

I texted Erica and Taylor, again. I was just
about to give up when Taylor texted me back.

“Sorry,” she wrote. “Something came up and
Erica and I can’t make it to Luigi’s tonight. We’ll do it another
night. Happy Birthday anyway!” She ended the text with a sad
face.

Why the hell couldn’t they “make it” and,
more importantly, where the hell were they? What was so important
that they had to cancel my birthday plans the day of and why didn’t
they tell me in person? I was fuming and crushing my empty
chocolate milk container in my hand when someone appeared behind
me.

“Whose head do you wish that was?”

I turned around to find Tessa alarmed and
genuinely concerned for whomever I aimed my wrath.

She patted my shoulder. “You need to calm
down, Willow. I’m sure it’s not that bad,” she said before turning
and heading toward a testosterone-filled table where all the
football players congregated.

I watched as she walked away and was
perturbed by her, too. How would she know how bad it was? I
couldn’t tell Tessa what was going on, especially since we didn’t
invite her to join us for my birthday celebration. Erica and Taylor
knew I was friendly with her, but I still hadn’t told them that I
had been to her house twice. They would still gossip about her
almost every day and, as much as I didn’t approve of it, I didn’t
feel close enough to Tessa to defend her. I would just sit and
listen to them and remain mum.

In my own way, I liked Tessa and suspected
she may have felt as lonely as I had at times. Maybe that’s why she
sought me out. Maybe she figured she could befriend the new girl
who no one had claimed yet. I didn’t know. I wasn’t a part of any
clique and really didn’t want to be.

Most days I missed the close friendships I
had had with Gabby, Sarah and Becca back in Massachusetts, but I
realized it might take some time to make similar friendships with
others in my new school. It had taken over eight years for ours to
develop into such a strong bond. I just needed to be patient.

Lunch finally ended and I didn’t end up
seeing any of the girls the rest of the day. After my last class,
and as I headed toward my locker to collect my books for the
weekend, I spotted Victoria in the hallway. I waved to her, but she
ignored me and answered her cell phone instead. I would text her
later and hoped that she and Megan could still meet up with me. I
figured three was better than none.

I sat by myself on the boat ride back to the
island so I could pout in peace. All week long I had so been
looking forward to the five of us going out for my birthday. I was
disappointed to say the least. And just when I thought my day
couldn’t get any worse, Victoria answered my text. She apologized
and said that she and Megan couldn’t make it either. I couldn’t
believe it and thought I would burst into tears.