Indulge (20 page)

My mother puts out her hands to take him. “My God, Beau. It’s like looking at you as an infant all over again.”

My mother hugs him, rocking side to side, as she kisses the top of his head. “He smells so good.”

Peach and I look at one another and smile, saying nothing about the shitty mess we had on our hands an hour ago.

My mother goes to Peach and hugs her. “Thank you for giving us our first grandson.”

Peach smiles but doesn’t respond.

“Look at his outfit, Darby. He’s definitely one of ours because he’s ready to cheer on the dogs.” I can tell my dad is proud.

We go into the living room and spend the next hour letting my parents get to know Peach and their grandson. I see her gradually ease but stiffen again when my mother asks about the type books she writes. “Umm . . . romance.”

My mom reads all the time. I hope she doesn’t decide to pick up
Hede
. I already don’t like that Caroline has read it.

“Not your speed, Mom.”

“Shut up. You don’t know anything about my speed. Need I remind you I have five children?”

That’s more than I needed to hear. “No ma’am.”

Caroline and Ashlyn are the first to arrive. Of course, Ash has her bunny in hand.

I haven’t seen my niece in a while so I take her from Caro to make the introduction between the two Emerson grandchildren. “You see my baby, Ashlyn? This is your cousin, Clark. You’re going to be good friends one day.”

Ashlyn squeals as she reaches out with grasping hands for Clark but I pull her back. She loves to hug very tightly. “I don’t think he’s quite ready for her kind of love.”

Ashlyn needs a distraction. “Hey, baby girl. Show Anna James your toy.”

Peach beams. “Is that the bunny I bought for her?”

“It is. If you’ll remember, she wasn't much older than what Clark is now when you bought it for her. Favorite toy ever. She won’t give it up for anything.”

Caroline punches my arm. “You told me you bought this for Ashlyn.”

I shrug. “I lied. Anna James did.”

“You couldn’t have chosen anything she would have loved more. That bunny is her best friend,” Caroline says.

“So glad she has enjoyed it.”

While we wait for my brothers, Caroline grills Peach about the new book and any future projects she’s willing to talk about.

Judd, Hutch, and Wilder arrive one by one, and I’m amused by their reactions to Peach. None of them can take their eyes off her, but I get it. I’m the same way.

Cream lacy dress. Boots. Loose curls. Gorgeous.

“Bro, that is a hot piece of ass. I totally understand why you’d want to hold on to that,” Judd says. “Give me a girl like that, and even I’ll settle down.”

Peach is a beautiful woman but that’s not what draws me to her. “I want to be with Anna James because I love her.”

“I think we can all agree it’s easier to love someone who looks like that.”

I look at her standing in the kitchen with Caroline, Ashlyn, and my parents. “It’s easy to love her, period.”

I
get
to experience three of my favorite things at the same time: the woman I love, our son, and Georgia Bulldogs game day. Doesn’t get much better than this.

We're tailgating on campus before the game. It's almost October but still blazing hot. It's barely midday but Clark is already soaked with sweat. He's fussy so Peach and I take him into my parents’ RV where it's cool.

“He's getting hungry. Can I go into the bedroom to nurse him?”

“Sure.”

I walk to the back with her and open the door. She brushes against me when she squeezes by.
Fuck. Even her simplest touch has the power to send me into orbit.

I’ve never seen her nurse our son. But I want to. “Is it weird that I want to watch you feed him?”

“Weird? No. Awkward? Yes.”

I can guess what she’s thinking. “Although I’d love to see your perfect tits again, it has nothing to do with that. I’ve missed every part of his life. Even the little stuff like this. It’s not a good feeling.”

I step out of the doorway to give her the privacy she wants. “It’s okay. You can stay.”

She’s already said it would be awkward. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“And I don’t want to be the reason you miss the little stuff you want to be a part of.” The corners of her mouth turn upward. She uses her hand to gesture for me to enter. “Come in.”

I step inside, pull the door shut, and sit next to her on the bed. Clark latches on and his hand goes for a strand of Peach’s hair. At first, I think he’s going to yank it but instead, he rubs it between his fingers as he nurses. The bond I see between them mesmerizes me. I’m a little jealous. “Does he always play with your hair like that?”

“Yeah. It’s his thing. Has been since he was old enough to reach out for it.”

“Those are the kinds of things I should know about but don’t.” And Preston does. That pisses me off.

“It’ll come in time, Beau.” No, it won’t. Not if we’re together two days a week for only a few hours.

Preston reminds me very much of Heath. He’s in the picture claiming what I consider mine. I hate it and I can’t do anything about it because it’s what Peach has chosen.

Clark finishes eating. “We should probably head up so we don’t get caught in the last-minute rush.”

I like having Peach and Clark in this place with my family and friends. For a moment, I can almost pretend she’s here because she wants to be with me, and not as part of our arrangement for visitation.

“This is nicer than the suite I visited with my friend.”

“There are some even better ones but this is where we like to be. Our friends are here.” Peach doesn’t yet understand this isn’t only about our immediate family. This is where we come together with our family friends as well.

“Want something to eat?”

“Oh, God, no. I’m stuffed from tailgating but I’d love some water. I have to be careful to stay hydrated when I’m out in the heat or my milk supply declines. And this little guy won’t be a happy camper.”

He is his father’s son. “Men typically aren’t happy when their food supply is taken from them.”

I spot Daphne Clayton when I go to fetch Peach’s water but it’s too late to dodge her.

“Beau!” She’s so fucking loud, always doing whatever it takes to gain people’s attention.

“Hi, Daphne. How are you?”

I look to Judd for help. He laughs while expanding his cheek out with his tongue and imitating a blow job with his hand.
Motherfucker.

I wish Mom would see that and slap the piss out of him. Because she totally would, right here in front of God and everybody.

Our family has been friends with Daphne’s our entire lives. She’s several years younger than me so I always looked at her as a kid––until we were older. She started pursuing me when she was sixteen, but I never looked her way until she came home from college one Christmas.

We fucked. And I found out quickly she was a leech. She still is even though it’s been more than ten years after the fact.
Still regretting that one.

“I want to know when you’re going to give in and hire me to stage one of your flips.” Never. I couldn’t stand to spend that kind of time with her.

“I don’t pay Kay for staging my houses. We trade out.”

“How do you trade out with that ol’ bag?” Kay is a nice lady so that comment pisses me off.

“She gets jobs from my clients because I recommend her services. In exchange, she stages for me.” It’s a sweet deal that works well for both of us.

“I can do a better job.”

“I can’t afford you.” Lie.

“Bullshit, Beau. I know how much money you make.” That’s where the bullshit comes in. She has no damn idea what I make. I don’t talk personal finances with anyone.

I look over at Peach and notice her watching us before she quickly looks away. “Maybe I’ll give you a call sometime.”

“You should do that. You already know I can show you a good time.” I was referring to business so she’d leave me alone. I definitely didn’t mean I’d call her for personal reasons.

Daphne comes up on her toes and kisses me. “I have some people to see but we’ll talk later.” No, we won’t.

I hope Peach didn’t see that kiss.

“I grabbed spring but would you prefer sparkling?” Fairly sure she prefers the fizz.

She takes the bottle from my hand and turns away. “It’s fine. I’m sure you were distracted while you were trying to decide.”

I have to be transparent with Peach if she’s going to trust me. “That was Daphne Clayton. Would you like me to introduce you?”

“Why would I need to meet her?” She’s staring me down, giving me that look I see from my mom when my dad’s done wrong.

Damn. I think she may be jealous.
That lifts my spirits.

“I think it’s important for you to know everyone who will be around Clark.”

“Why would Clark be around that woman?”

“Our families are friends so we see each other at functions.” More often than I’d like.

“Thanks, but I can do without an introduction. Her voice grates like nails down a chalkboard.”

I chuckle. “I’d agree with that assessment.”

My mom comes over, grinning sheepishly. “Can I borrow my grandson? I want to show him off.”

“Of course,” Peach says as she hands him over to my mother.

“I’ll keep him in the lounge where it’s cool if you want to sit in the stadium seats.”

“Want to?”

“Sure.”

I always sit in my stadium seat for at least the first quarter. I don’t like to be distracted by all the chitchat in the box’s lounge. Peach, however, is more than welcome to have all of my attention.

Today’s game is on ESPN so there’s a lot of time for conversation during commercial breaks. “What happened to Meredith and Grayson?”

“Oh, lawdy. Things were rough for a while but they worked through their problems. Thank God. And now Clark has given Mere a bad case of baby fever. They started trying for a baby this month.” A girly squeal follows. “I hope she gets pregnant soon so our babies can grow up together.”

I’m not sure how compatible an infant would be with their lifestyle. “Are they still swinging?”

“Linc scared the shit out of Meredith. And Grayson. It opened their eyes to all the bad shit that could happen so they made the decision to never do it again. As far as I know, they’ve been monogamous since Jamaica. And couldn’t be happier.” God, she’s so damn beautiful when she smiles.

I miss this. The ease of casual conversation like we had in Jamaica.

“I contacted the general manager of Indulge after I was home and told him what Linc had done. He was blackballed and will never be allowed to return. Neither will Carl Dennison. I reported him as well after you told me what he did.” It’s not near what he deserves since I consider his actions the reason Peach and I aren’t together now.

“That’s good but they both need red warning labels around their necks for the rest of the world’s safety.”

“Won’t argue with that.”

She looks at her hands in her lap, picking at the polish on her nails. “Have you been back to the resort?”

Phoebe and Zoey bugged the shit out of me to go, but I couldn’t pull the trigger.

I grasp her chin and force her to look at me. If Peach is going to ask me that, she’s going to look me in the eyes when I answer. “No. Haven’t set foot down there since last July. I couldn’t bear being there because I’d see your face everywhere. I let my membership go.”

She takes a sharp inhale of breath.

I feel a hand on my shoulder. “Beau! You’re on kiss cam. Kiss your girl,” my mom’s best friend, Marlana, says.

I hear the chorus of “Kiss Kiss” and quickly turn to see our picture on the big screen. I turn back, and without permission, I lay on her one of our best kisses ever. And she lets me.

She moans lightly and I feel her lips, against mine, spread into a smile.

Our entire section erupts into cheers and catcalls.

I release her and smile. “Sorry. Had to be done per ordinance of the kiss cam.”

Her mouth remains slightly open and she’s staring at my mouth so I lean in and do it again. After a moment, she shrinks away.

“Beau,” she whispers before looking around to see who’s watching. She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth and then wipes it with her hand. “You shouldn’t have done that.”

It’s true. Nothing tastes sweeter than what you can’t have.

“I disagree.”

I stand to cheer for the Bulldogs, not giving her time to plead her case because it’ll do no good; she won’t convince me it was wrong.
I fucking hate I can’t do that whenever and wherever I want.

Four touchdowns for the Bulldogs, with two of them in the last quarter. It’s another huge win for us, and I’m stoked. Maybe that’s why I put my arms around Peach and surprise her with a full spin, causing her to squeal. “Beau!”

I return her to her feet. “Good grief. This family is obsessed.”

“I wasn’t kidding when I said we were hardcore fans. But this is how we like to spend time together. It works. Keeps us close.”

“It’s nice.”

“So, you don’t think you’ll mind your son growing up as an Emerson?”

“I’m glad he’s part of your family. And I’m happy to see how easily he was accepted.”

“He’s one of ours. Of course we accept him.”

“I realized today how hurt you are about missing the first five months of his life. I was wrong for keeping him from you, and I’ll forever be sorry about that. He needs his dad.”

“I was angry at first but I realized you were doing what you thought was best for him. But please understand that, as his father, I’m going to do what’s best for him, too.” It’s not even a choice really. I’m done with polyamory. Peach is it for me. Peach and Clark.

“You are already a wonderful father to Clark.”

“Thank you. I’m pleased to know you think so.” It would kill me if she thought otherwise.

“I let my pain influence my decision to not tell you about him. But I’m glad you found out; he would have missed out on knowing his daddy. And that would have been such a shame.”

Daddy. I melt hearing her call me that.

The game ends, but I have several more hours during my visitation. Today has been easy. Anna James effortlessly fit into my family, and everyone adores Clark. How could they not?

Doing nothing but doing it together is something I’ve looked forward to all week. I just want to spend time with my son and talk to Peach. For me, that’s the cherry on top of my sundae.

I pull into my drive and see a car I don’t recognize. “Don’t know who that is.”

“It’s Preston. I hope nothing is wrong.”

Fucker doesn’t need to think he’s going to show up at my place and intrude on my time with Peach and Clark. I’ve waited all week for this.

“I’ll take him in so you can see what’s going on.”

Clark and I go into the house, and I take him out of his car seat. He’s fussy and has been for half an hour. I think he’s ready to eat again. “I know, dude. I feel the same way. I want Mommy in here with us, too.”

Peach is outside with Preston much longer than I like. When she finally comes in, I can tell she’s been crying. “What’s wrong, Peach?”

I’m expecting her to say there’s been an accident or someone has died. She doesn’t. “Preston was at the game with some colleagues. He saw us on the kiss cam.”

Oh. I’m not really sure what to say about that. I’m not sorry I did it, but at the same time, I don’t want Preston giving her shit about it since I’m the one who kissed her. “Do I need to talk to him?”

“God, no. That will only make things worse.”

She fidgets with her engagement ring, twisting it on her finger. The stone is puny. Nothing like the diamond she deserves to wear.
I’d put the kind of ring she deserves to wear on her finger. Everyone would know she was taken. Mine.

“If he were a man, he would have come to me and settled this. Not jumped on you about something I did.”
What does she see in that bastard?

If this were the other way around and I was the fiancé, I would pull baby daddy aside and set him straight on some boundaries. But Preston is a puss.

“He’s upset I didn’t make you quit.” He’s not wrong. She didn’t make me stop. Either time. In fact, I think she was on the cusp of initiating the second kiss.

“I need a minute to freshen up.”

She disappears to the bathroom. I stretch out on the couch with Clark on my chest just the way I used to with Ashlyn. I turn on HGTV to my favorite fixer-upper show.

Peach stays in the bathroom for a while before returning. “I can’t believe you have little fancy soaps in your powder room.”

“Wasn’t me. Kay did that.”

“Who’s Kay?” she asks.

“She’s a stager I use when I get ready to put my flips on the market. She came in and spruced the place up after Phoebe and Zoey left.”

“I guess they kept your house in order while they were here?”

“Fuck, no. They didn’t lift a finger to clean. Kay came in to help me straighten up the path of their destruction.”

“They were so messy you had to hire a professional to clean up after them?”

“Not exactly. I called them after we were together in New York and told them to get out. They trashed my house.”