Inferno's Kiss (31 page)

The Order, determined to protect their kind, had created the
Absconditus
to preserve the strongest of their race from extinction. The
Prima Consul
and a few trusted members of the Order were the only ones privy to the existence of the
Absconditus
. While the Order and the
Absconditus
were separate from each other, as the reigning Sicari Lord, his decisions would overrule the
Prima Consul
in matters that concerned both entities.

He might have been young when he’d taken his oath, but he’d known even then that with the exception of the Sicari Lords still alive he was the strongest of all in the
Absconditus
. It had been not just his duty, but his desire, to protect his family. The family that had always been there and not deserted him. That had been the reason he’d taken his vow.

Placido had struck a nerve by accusing him of always putting the interests of others first. It wasn’t far from the truth when he’d made his decision all those years ago. His affection for Placido and Marcus
had
played a large part in his decision to focus all his resources on the guild. He couldn’t deny that. They’d raised him. They’d been his father
and
his mother.

But growing up he’d overheard and seen things that told him how much Marcus had sacrificed for the sake of the
Absconditus
. Even Placido had paid a price. Both men had loved and lost. It was something Dante had no intention of experiencing firsthand, even if Cleopatra did tie him into knots.

What he’d told Placido was true. It was a temporary state of affairs. His confession tonight had ensured that. When they’d completed the rescue at the convent, Cleopatra would go back to Chicago, and when Marcus retired, Dante would be in charge of the
Absconditus
. Everything was falling into place as planned, except for one thing. He’d never expected to find himself longing for a woman he couldn’t have.

Chapter 15

“THAT’S fabulous news. When? How is she? Are they still in Genova?” Cleo rattled off her questions in rapid succession into her cell phone as Ares’s voice echoed in her ear.

“
Christus,
one at a time, Cleo.” Ares chuckled. “Phae came out of the coma day before yesterday. We almost lost her until Lysander blood bonded with her. She’s tired, but is doing great.”

“He blood bonded with her?” Cleo gasped in amazement. She closed her eyes and offered up a brief prayer to Juno for the good news. Her two friends had finally gotten their act together. “So where are they now?”

“They left for the States this morning. Lysander and the doctors wanted her to stay another week, but she insisted on going home. She said she can rest at home just as easily as she can in the hospital.”

“Have they said anything about an official ceremony or celebration ?”

“Lysander mentioned doing something in another month or so when Phae’s fully recovered. In the meantime, the two of them are going to honeymoon at the White Cloud estate.” Static in the cell phone made Ares’s voice crackle slightly, and she couldn’t hear what he was saying. She turned slightly to keep the connection clear.

“What?”

“I asked why are you still in Rome? When I talked to Atia yesterday, it was obvious she wasn’t happy about it.” The sudden shift of direction in their conversation made her tense.

“I know she’s not, but I’m not ready to go back to Chicago or White Cloud,” she said quietly, unwilling to reveal
any
of her reasons for staying in Rome.

“So where the hell are you?” Ares asked pointedly. “I checked the Rome guild, and they said you hadn’t reported in.”

She turned her head at the sound of footsteps and saw Dante enter the library. Her senses were immediately humming with electricity. Damnit, what the fuck was wrong with her? The man had dedicated himself to the
Absconditus.
He was untouchable. Irritated by her physical response to the man, she turned sharply away from him to finish up her conversation with Ares.

“I’m in a safe place, okay? Marcus knows where I am, so you don’t need to worry about me,” she said in the best reassuring voice she could muster. “I need to go. Tell Lysander and Phae I can’t wait to see them.”

“Damnit, Cleo, I know you’re up to something. You didn’t stay behind just—”

“Look, there’s someone here. I’ll talk to you later.”

Heedless of her friend’s curse-filled protest, she pressed the END button on her cell phone. Ares would probably read her the riot act for that the next time they saw each other. The man hated it when she hung up on him. The sound of Bonnie Tyler’s “Holding Out for a Hero” echoed from her phone, and she glanced downward. Ares. She pressed the IGNORE button and turned the phone off before shoving it back into her pants pocket.

Stiffening her shoulders, she turned to face Dante. Awkward. That was the only way she could have described it if someone had asked. Damned awkward. She wanted to believe he was as uncomfortable as she felt, but he looked completely at ease. It was irritating. It was even more irritating that she was feeling self-conscious.

She rarely cared what others thought of her, and certainly not what this man thought. A snort of laughter echoed in the back of her head. She ignored it. It had been this way for three weeks now. Ever since that night in the garden, the two of them had been dancing around each other as if they were sparring partners. They’d done everything they could to avoid each other.

Actually, she was pretty sure she was the one doing all the avoiding. A couple of times, Dante had tried to talk to her, but she’d dodged him completely except when others were present. It wasn’t like he was the first Sicari male to reject her. But his
reason
was definitely a first. She’d been pissed as hell when she’d left the garden after he told her the truth about his oath. Partly because she’d never been that sexually frustrated before, and partly because the man hadn’t bothered to tell her up front that he’d committed his body, mind, and soul to the
Absconditus
.

It didn’t help that she had to take some of the blame herself. She’d been hell-bent on seducing the guy and hadn’t really given him a chance to say much of anything.

And if she were really honest with herself, the real reason she’d been avoiding him like the plague was because she was embarrassed. Dante was different from the other Sicari males who’d passed her over. She didn’t know how, but he’d touched something deep inside her. It made his rejection hurt worse than she cared to admit. If possible, it made her feel even more inadequate than ever before.

She’d made it a rule to stay away from Sicari men after Michael, and Dante was as Sicari as they came. So for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out why she’d made a play for him. It wasn’t like she didn’t know better. She bit the inside of her cheek. It didn’t help matters that his dedication was a complete waste in her opinion.

The man was beautiful. What in Jupiter’s name had convinced him that he couldn’t lead his guild
and
have a healthy, loving relationship at the same time? She sucked in a sharp breath. Loving relationship? Had she lost her mind? Even if his oath wasn’t an obstacle, a relationship was the last thing she wanted.

It indicated permanency. Something she knew was out of her grasp. Despite that knowledge, her heartbeat still reverberated in her ears like a freight train as he crossed the floor toward her. Fight or flight? The instinct of survival at work.

Only problem was, she couldn’t dart off so easily this time. The entire rescue team was due in the library in a short while for lastminute instructions regarding tonight’s raid on the convent. She’d just happened to show up early. Then there was the possibility that her subconscious had arranged for her to get here before everyone else.

Was it possible she’d secretly hoped to find a moment alone with him? She swallowed the ball of fear wedged in her throat. It didn’t matter whether her subconscious had finagled her early arrival or not. Flight was no longer an option. She didn’t have much choice but to stick it out until someone else showed up.

Leaving the room right now would make her look like a coward. Something she wasn’t, even if she’d been acting like one for the past few weeks. She tensed as he stopped a couple of feet away from her, and despite the reasonable distance between them, a heat wave of sensation rolled over her skin. Her stomach lurched as she realized his ability to set her on edge hadn’t weakened.

It wasn’t just a physical attraction. And there was plenty of that on her part. Her body was an explosion of awareness whenever she got near him. If anything, his presence was stronger than before, and something else had slipped into her heart as well. She sneered inwardly at the fanciful thought.

They barely knew each other. How was it possible to have any feelings other than lust for a man she didn’t know very well? And yet she did know him. Watching him with Pietro the day of Giuseppe and Santino’s fight had only emphasized the little things she’d been picking up on since he’d carried her out of that dark alley.

He was compassionate, kind, and loyal. Sure, he was a little uptight, but that could be from dealing with her none-too-subtle come-ons. He had a caring nature and reminded her a lot of Ares and Lysander. In the back of her mind, the resemblance she’d drawn between Dante and Lysander stirred to life before her thoughts returned to Dante’s qualities. It was that caring nature of his that made her realize she had feelings for him she shouldn’t have. Feelings she didn’t want to examine because their only possible outcome was heartbreak.

“Can we talk, or are you going to run away again?” That dark, sexy voice of his was like a warm, lazy finger trailing its way down her back. She flinched before she stiffened her shoulders.

“Run away? I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she lied. He arched his eyebrows at her, and she gritted her teeth. She didn’t like it that he could see right through her.

“I want to explain the night in the garden,” he said quietly.

“What’s there to explain?” She shrugged in an open display of sarcasm. “You took a vow of celibacy and didn’t bother to tell me until
after
I made a fool of myself trying to seduce you.”

There. She’d said it. It was out in the open now. She thought saying it would make her feel better, but it didn’t. In fact, the disappointment winding its way through her body was alarming. She dealt it a crushing blow. He was off-limits.

“You are
not
a fool,” he said with a quiet intensity that surprised her. “But I was a fool for not telling you the truth right away.”

“And why didn’t you?” she bit out fiercely. “Why let me think you were interested in me if you knew you couldn’t . . . that there would never be anything between us?”

“Because I wanted you.” A tortured look flashed across his face as she stared at him in disbelief. “I’ve wanted you from those first few moments I found you in that alley the night you assassinated Angotti.”

“And this is supposed to make me feel better how?” she snapped. She ignored the heat skimming through her that made her nipples hard and tingly.

“Damnit, Cleopatra. This isn’t easy for me.” He shoved a hand through his hair. “I took an oath. It’s not something I can just toss aside.”

“Fine, you can’t break your vow of celibacy.” Hands resting on her hips, she tilted her head in an open display of irritated disgust. “But just because you’re attracted to me doesn’t mean you had to keep me in the dark. You should have just told me the truth. I would have understood.”

“It’s not that simple.”

“
Yes
, it
is
.” She puffed out a breath of exasperation. “I respect the decision you made, and I just don’t see the problem.”

“It’s a problem because every time I get near you, I
want
to break my oath,” he said in a raw whisper that scraped across her senses like fire, and she saw a flash of torment in his dark blue eyes. “Not once in all these years have I ever regretted dedicating myself to the
Absconditus
. That is, not until I met you.”

Stunned, she didn’t have the slightest idea how to react to his confession. In a strange way, he’d just paid her the highest compliment a man could ever pay a woman. He found her desirable enough to consider betraying something he believed in deeply. She’d obviously not made it easy for him. In fact, after that mind-blowing moment in her apartment and then that incredible encounter in the garden, she’d have to say he’d reacted like any normal, hot-blooded male would.

It didn’t matter that he’d given off enough signs that he wasn’t experienced with women. She should have known something was off when he was so tentative in his kisses and even his caresses. But she refused to take all the blame for the situation, and she sure as hell didn’t like the idea that he might be thinking of her as forbidden fruit.

“Are you blaming me for being a temptation you’re having trouble resisting?” she asked in a frigid tone. “Because if you are, I’m not buying it.”

“
No
, that’s
not
what I’m saying,” he growled as he turned away to cross the floor and stare out the window. “
Christus
, I don’t know
what
the hell I’m saying.”

Hands clasped behind his back, he stared out at the inner courtyard. The reddish orange light of the setting sun streamed through the window to throw his tall figure into shadowy relief. As she studied his solitary stance, her heart suddenly ached for him. He seemed so alone, and it made her long to go to him. Instead, she didn’t move. She was feeling edgy enough about tonight. She didn’t need something else weighing down on her—like seeing him get hurt or worse.

“Look, tonight we’re getting those women out of that Praetorian hellhole. I’ll be gone in less than two days, and our lives can go back to normal.” The idea that she could fall back into her daily routine without thinking about him again struck her as hopeless. “I’ll be gone and you won’t feel
tempted
to label me Lilith in your fall from grace.”