Infinite Risk (26 page)

“When are you inviting me over to see your new place?” he asked.

“I'm not sure.” For some reason, reluctance percolated through me, maybe because the flat was a gift from the Harbinger. To bring Kian in seemed disrespectful or something.

“Is there some reason I can't come?” He really was too perceptive.

I shrugged. “It's just … I share the place with my boyfriend. So I should check with him before inviting anyone.” That was more or less true, though I hadn't seen him since he dropped me off at the Baltimore on Saturday morning.

“Wow. But … is that a good idea? From your descriptions, I wouldn't exactly call Colin reliable. I mean, I haven't seen him around all week.”

For some reason, this pissed me off, and I found myself defending him. “He travels for work. You know he's a musician, right?”

Kian shook his head. “Sorry, I forgot. You don't talk about him much. But it makes sense that he has an irregular schedule if he's traveling for gigs.” He seemed self-conscious about the last word, as if he wasn't sure he'd used it correctly.

“He's not a saint,” I said. “But he's been there for me during some pretty rough times. I can't forget that.”

“Makes sense.” He gave the impression he was placating me, but I let it go.

“How are things with Vonna?” It wasn't a great conversation shift, but honest curiosity made me ask.

“Good so far. But it's only been like a week and we haven't done anything but hang out at school so far.”

“Maybe you can spend some time together tonight.”

He flashed a bright smile. “I hope so.”

My stop came up shortly, so I waved and got off the bus. It was incredible to key in a code so I could enter the foyer. The attendant waved at me as I went to the elevator and took it to my sparkling-clean fourth-floor unit. My brass key opened the apartment door, as it had for the last week, and I shook off the fear that it would suddenly morph into a live worm, and that I'd find I had been squatting in a cardboard box for the last two days.

There was no sign the Harbinger had been here in my absence. Fighting disappointment, I fixed a snack, as he'd left me a fully stocked fridge. If I was careful, I wouldn't need to buy food for another two weeks, and that didn't account for any of the canned goods in the cupboard. In my quiet, clean, and safe apartment, loneliness knocked at the door, but I didn't let it in.

Instead, I took a shower and then did all my homework.
You can take the geek out of her timeline, etc.
That killed a few hours, and then it was time to walk to Carmen's. She was eight blocks farther out, not worth getting on the bus. The weather had gotten warmer. Either nature was asserting itself over Wedderburn's fit of pique or Dwyer was showing his strength to make a point. Regardless, my hoodie and jean jacket was enough even at night.

Carmen lived in a ramshackle blue Victorian-style house that was tall and narrow with a sagging porch. As I came up the steps, I could hear a couple of kids yelling inside. When I rang the bell, the doom theme from
Star Wars
played. She opened the door a minute later, looking slightly harried.

“Sorry, the little monsters are being stubborn about dinner.”

“I want pizza,” a boy about seven yelled.

“How does your mom sleep through this?” I wondered aloud.

“Necessity and practice. Come on in.” She turned to address her pint-size critic. “If you eat the soup, I'll let you have Popsicles.”

The boy exchanged a look with a girl a year or two older. “Deal. But we get as many crackers as we want.”

“I don't care, just get in the kitchen and eat. The baby's already down for the night,” she added to me. “No thanks to these two.”

“Is this why you invited us over?” I asked.

“Because I couldn't go out otherwise? Basically, yes. That Saturday we went to the party was a rare exception and my mom had the night off.”

Obviously, I wondered about Mr. Maldonado but if she didn't mention him, I figured she must have a good reason. I followed her into the kitchen to supervise her siblings. This time, they ate the chicken soup without complaint, but I noticed an impressive number of oyster crackers went down their gullets as well. Two orange Popsicles later, she banished them to play in their rooms as the bell rang again.

She sighed. “My older brother's idea of a joke. So far we can't figure out how to change or disconnect it.”

Kian and Vonna stood on the porch, as if they'd come together, and they were holding hands. I ignored the sinking sensation in my stomach and summoned a bright smile. “Hey, guys. I hope you're ready for some cinema magic.”

Vonna stepped in first, and he helped her out of her jacket. “With Nathan in charge? I bet we'll get a Scream fest.”

“Could be worse,” Kian said.

“Yeah, he could dig up all the I Know What You Did movies.” Carmen beckoned to us and led the way down the basement stairs.

Like most old houses, the steps were scary, skeletal wood, but downstairs, the cement room had been painted a cheerful yellow and filled with comfortable furniture that looked like it had been lifted from various grandmothers. On one side, there was a red floral overstuffed sofa that somehow didn't look hideous with the green plaid love seat or the orange armchair. There were also giant pillow seats and like five beanbags. This was clearly a room where people could crowd in and still feel cozy. Our apartment wouldn't have allowed me to invite this many friends over, and a small pang went through me. A spark of light shot from my fingertips, and I hid them behind my back, heart thumping like mad.

Did anyone see that?

“It's a mess, I know,” Carmen mumbled.

Based on the minivan, it was cleaner than I expected. All the toys were piled in the box, and the super fluffy gray rug looked as if it had been vacuumed recently. Cushions in all hues lay scattered on the floor, tempting you to curl up like a puppy. As for the TV, it was a big box unit, but when she flicked it on, the picture was good. She left us watching music videos when the bell rang again, and I busied myself inspecting the family photos that lined the wall near the stairs. While Kian and Vonna quietly tried to decide where to sit, I was third-wheeling up a storm. I'd almost decided to go back upstairs when Carmen returned with everyone else.

“So this is the family room,” she said, juggling DVDs presumably from Nathan.

“Nice,” Elton said.

I wandered around inspecting everything while Elton promptly claimed the orange chair. Once I picked the love seat, Devon sat next to me. That left the couch for Kian and Vonna. Nathan yielded the last spot to Carmen and flopped in one of the beanbags. She dimmed the lights and started the first movie. Everyone had guessed wrong, as it was a terrifying Japanese import. I jumped more than once and covered my eyes for about half of it. At least pure terror kept me from staring at Kian, who had taken the opportunity to wrap an arm around Vonna. Even I had to admit they made a cute couple.

“You're the only one who will be unhappy if you keep quiet,” Devon whispered.

I jumped at his proximity, not realizing he was paying attention. Dismissing the idea of a flippant
whatever
, because anyone this astute deserved better, I leaned over to make sure nobody could hear. “Timing is everything, you know? And sometimes we just can't have what we want. It would be selfish of me to say anything when I can't stick around. It's better for him to be happy. Just look at how she makes him smile.”

Vonna must have cracked a joke because Kian's shoulders shook with silent laughter. Devon watched them for a few seconds before nodding. “I get you. And I can respect that.”

“Don't say anything, okay? It would only make things awkward, and I honestly want things to go well for them.”

“I'm definitely not the meddling kind. Plus, I've known Vonna since first grade. She deserves somebody who will treat her right.”

“She'll never meet anyone sweeter or more devoted.” Tears stung my eyes, and I blinked them away.
Who knew it would feel so awful to give the blessing for your first love to be happy with someone else?

I focused on the movie again, though the terror had lost some of its grip on me. Carmen brought drinks and chips down during intermission. Her younger siblings put in an appearance, and she had to go read them a story. That left Elton flipping channels while Devon called suggestions.

“We're not watching Lifetime,” Nathan snapped.

“Women's tennis.” Vonna seemed comfortable tucked against Kian's side, not self-conscious now that the lights had come up.

The guys didn't seem disposed to tease her, either. I'd noticed they were protective, courtesy of a shared past I knew little about.
I wish I had friends I'd known since grade school.
But when my parents transferred me to Blackbriar, I lost touch with my classmates, and in all honesty, I hadn't been close with anyone before the move. Regular students saw me as a kiss-up while the smart ones considered me a rival for the position of teacher's pet. Doubtless poor social skills contributed to my friendless state, but if I could rewrite history, I wouldn't go to a fancy private academy. My parents could save their money, and I'd enroll in a science-focused magnet school. But that was pointless speculation. In my timeline, I'd graduate from Blackbriar on independent study and go to college with only my father to celebrate my achievements.

Presuming I survive this and can return.

Contemplating the future that awaited, a wave of pain wracked me so hard I doubled over. I hadn't let myself picture returning before. Maybe part of me hoped that this future would replace my old one, but the Harbinger made it clear time travel didn't work that way. There was no way to wipe the slate clean. Creating a new world wasn't a minor feat, though. I should be proud, right?

Devon touched my shoulder. “Are you sick?”

Managing to smile, I shook my head. “Sorry. Ate too much salsa, I guess.”

“Carmen's pico de gallo is no joke if you're not used to it.” He rubbed my back until I felt a little better, not from the fictional stomachache, but due to simple human contact.

“Thanks. I'm okay now.”

My smile faded when I realized Kian was watching Devon and me with an odd expression. I didn't know what to make of it, but I hadn't done anything wrong. Carmen hurried down the stairs, out of breath from coming down two flights in a rush. She leaned against the wall to rest, breaking the spell. I glanced away to find that Elton had turned on a Cinemax soft-core. The resultant panting and moaning made everyone supremely uncomfortable.

“Enough of that.” Carmen snatched the remote and switched it back to the DVD player. “Sorry, guys. We should be good for another movie. They'll pass out soon.”

“It's cool,” Devon said. “I'm an only, so I like seeing how the other half lives.”

“You want to swap?” Carmen offered.

He shook his head quickly as she started the next flick. Nathan's second pick was an action comedy, two cops played by Martin Lawrence and Will Smith. Humor matched the explosions, and I enjoyed it a lot. More important, I wasn't completely freaked out when it came time to walk home.

“This was awesome,” I said, standing. “Thanks for having us over.”

“It's not even midnight.” Nathan seemed affronted. “We have two more movies to watch.”

“Some of us have curfews,” Vonna said.

Kian added, “I need to catch the last bus.”

Despite Nathan's objections, the party broke up at twenty minutes to twelve. I waved as I headed out. The others went toward the bus stop, leaving me to walk home alone. It hadn't seemed spooky earlier, but despite the streetlights, I couldn't shake the sensation that someone—or something—was watching me. Touching Aegis for reassurance, I quickened my pace, practically sprinting between pools of the light. The shadows seemed deeper where the brightness didn't touch, like it was filled with sentience. My skin prickled. There was no safety. If something was chasing me, getting back to the apartment wouldn't help.

My mom died at home.

Footsteps rang out behind me.
Okay, so it's not my imagination.
That helped. I forced myself to calm down. By reacting like prey, I'd make whatever this was even more anxious for the kill.
I'm not a victim anymore.
While my skills might be a little rusty, Aegis would take up the slack. The sword vibrated on my wrist, its thirst drying my mouth. For a moment, my vision went white with the need to fight.

Sensing my pursuer behind me, I whirled and swung. Selena barely sidestepped my strike. A lock of her hair dropped to the pavement, and she stared at me hard. “Killing the messenger isn't cool.”

“You scared the shit out of me. What're you
doing
?”

“I'm keeping you safe, moron. I'm not the only one tailing you tonight. Weird old git, smells like death and camphor, big burlap sack, two creepy kids. Ring any bells?”

“Crap.”

He works for Wedderburn. He killed my mother.

“I thought I'd only have to deal with the hag, but the winter whatsit has a serious hate on for you.”

“That's not news,” I admitted.

“Just … be careful. Big Bro gets pissy when he loses, not that you'll be around to suffer those consequences.” Her gaze locked onto my sword, and I hastily deactivated Aegis, but from her speculative expression, it was probably too late.

“Noted. Thanks for the warning.”

I wondered what she'd tell Dwyer when she got back.
Guess what? The girl you have me guarding has a sword made out of … well, you.
Somehow I suspected our alliance might break down if he discovered that truth. But no point in fretting about it now. Folding my arms, I waited for her reaction.