Inhuman (4 page)

Just as he began lifting up my shirt to remove it, I stopped him. “Wait…please.” 

I didn’t even know why, but I suddenly felt like everything was moving too fast. My breath was quick and my pulse thudded hard and fast in my veins.

Stopping immediately, he whispered in my ear. “You okay?”

“Yes.” I stuttered as I straightened out my skirt and blouse. “I…I’m…”

I’m embarrassed to tell you I’m a virgin
. I could think it, but saying it was another thing entirely.

Entering the club, the bass was thunderous and the rainbow of strobe lights pulsated hypnotically. Drunk and sweaty, the masses that were crammed on the dance floor swayed and gyrated against each other.

Clinging to Keanu’s arm, I held on for dear life while still trying to appear calm and cool. Leading me happily to the center of the room, he pulled me close and began to slow dance even though the music was hard rock.

Closing my eyes as I rested my head on his chest, I tried to imagine us anywhere but here. Buried within a pile of drunken bodies was not my idea of a romantic date, but I was really happy just being near him.

Leaning into me, he elicited a fresh wave of shivers down my back as he gently pushed my hair away from my ear and asked, “Would you like a drink?” Smiling and nodding, he took my hand and led me to the bar. “What do you drink?” He yelled over the racket.

“Iced tea.” I extended my voice to the loudest it would go.

“Long Island?”

“No, virgin please.” Giving me the strangest look, he ordered our drinks and when we received them, I followed him to a quieter section of the bar.

Sitting in a secluded area of the lounge, we snuggled into the corner of a booth. Watching all the pretty, and obviously inebriated, girls go by; I began feeling a little out of my element. Actually, a lot out of my element. What was I doing here? Yes, I really liked this guy, but what did I really know of him…or him of me?

Sipping my drink slowly, I tried to enjoy myself. It was a rarity that I ever went out, let alone on a date.

Keanu would look at me every so often, smile mischievously, and then lean over and kiss me on the lips, neck, or wherever he so desired. With his large arm around me, I felt safe and warm. Stealing glances at his face while he watched the band play, I admired the contours of his jaw, his kind eyes and handsome smile.

An unfamiliar feeling swept over me as the world seemed to slow down. As I thought about school, Amy, Keanu and my life at that moment, I experienced a feeling I hadn’t had before—happiness.

***

 “Do you…want to come in?” I hugged the doorframe behind me as I invited Keanu into my room.

Taking a step closer, he raised his hand to my face and stroked my cheek with the back of his fingers. “Are you sure?” Uncertainty shadowed his handsome face.

Nodding, I took his hand from my cheek and kissed his palm, then ushering him into my dorm room, I closed the door and locked it.

Standing before him in my dimly lit apartment, an awkwardness overwhelmed me as I realized I didn’t know what to do next.

Good thing he made the first move.

He sauntered toward me with a sheepish smile. Sliding his right hand over my shoulder and under my hair to hold the nape of my neck, he slowly drew me to him. Tenderly, his left hand slid under my shirt, passed my waist and grazed to the small of my back.

Slow dancing to only the sound of our impassioned breath, he leaned over and placed his mouth on mine. Darting his tongue softly against my mine, I felt his fingers move up my spine to undo my bra.

Smooth.

My lips twitched into a smile as I felt the clasps release in the back, my breasts now free from their restraints. Still a bit tender from the mammogram, I winced as he cupped the left one in his hand. Despite the mild ache, the delicate caress forced a moan from my lips.

Kissing my neck, his palms moved out from under my shirt and slid down the sides of my hips.

A mixture of cologne and pheromone, his scent overwhelmed me; it made my head spin as I ran my fingers through his wavy hair.

Feeling a tug at the bottom of my suede skirt, I took a sharp breath in as I realized he was pulling it up. Hearing my gasp, he paused to look into my eyes, as though awaiting permission.

An instinct suddenly possessed me as I pushed him closer to the bed. Gesturing for him to sit down, I then reached around and unzipped my skirt. Wriggling out of it, I let it slide down my thighs to the floor; I then lifted up my shirt and pulled it over my head.

My bra still hung off my arms, hiding the last of my naked chest. Pulling the straps off one at a time, I teased him as I covered my breasts with my forearms. Finally, I let the bra fall to the floor and my hands moved to my side.

His eyes stayed focused on mine for a moment and then he scanned my body with an expression of lust branded on his face. At first, he seemed not to notice my birthmark buried deep in the hollow of my bosom, but then he stared at it, fixated.

“Is that a tattoo?” I could tell he was trying to sound casual but his voice cracked a little as he asked. Removing his clothes, I found it hard to concentrate as I stared at his chest—not to mention everything else.

“No.” Self-doubt crept out of the shadows and into my consciousness as I crossed my arms and hid my breasts again.

“It’s…beautiful.” His eyes twinkled as he reached for me and pulled me close to him. Undraping my arms from their protective stance around my breasts, he slowly and methodically kissed both of them. Running his fingers between them, he paused and playfully examined my star birthmark.

His fingers trailed to my hips. Sliding his thumbs between fabric and skin, he tugged lightly at my panties, guiding them over my contours and eventually to my ankles.

With him still sitting on the bed, he pulled me on top of him. After straddling him, he then took over and carefully eased my hips closer to his.

“Cassia.” Keanu whispered my name making it sound like a line of poetry as we gently moved our bodies together.

Chapter 5

Most people dream random, silly or scary dreams. They find themselves standing naked in front of a crowd or a crocodile chasing them, trying to eat their pants.

But not mine.

Mine have always been vivid memories of my childhood with encrypted secrets twisted within.

While cuddled in the crook of Keanu’s large arm, my eyelids fluttered furiously as I relived a moment of my past mingled with a subconscious message. 

My bare feet burned on the Sedona desert as the sun poured scalding rays over top of me. Tiny grains of sand had burrowed themselves into corners of my eyes, making it nearly impossible to keep them open. With my lips cracked and my throat now unable to swallow, white patches of dried spittle caked at the corners of my mouth.

The only saving grace was a weak wind from the east to sooth my baking skin. Forcing my legs to move forward, my eyes narrowed to a slit as they scoured the landscape for any sign of the reservation, or better yet, water.

Lost.

It started out as a mission to find the cave where my mother had given birth to me; it ended up a near death experience. Four days I’d wandered the endless reaches of the ocean of sand, first searching for my past and then for my future. If I didn’t find my way home, or if my tribe didn’t find me soon, there’d be nothing left to bring home.

Only nine years old, I wondered what kind of mother could abandon her baby. What kind of person leaves her child to live—or die—alone in a cave? What if the medicine woman, now my grandmother, hadn’t found me there? Would my mother have cared? Did she return to make sure someone had found me?

Reliving my past within my dream, I felt a lump in my throat form and a quiet sob escape me. Lucid enough to know I had company in my bed with me, I forced silence upon myself.

In reality, a search party found me eight miles from the reservation, face down and barely alive. In my dream, however, I found myself standing at the mouth of a cave.

Entering the cave, I hear droplets of moisture echoing as they splatter against the rocks. A pungent mildew scent invades my nostrils causing them to flare. Gliding my hand along the rough terrain of the cavern walls to guide me, I move through the veil of darkness. The further I go, the more the shadows swallow the light.

I sense a presence in the cave with me, just behind me. Without turning around, I know that it is someone—or something—protecting me.

As the dream continues, I suddenly find myself lying upon the floor of the cave. Shadows move around me with haste, though I can’t see who’s making them.

Clutching his shoulders, I tried to focus on the task at hand. Tossing out the occasional moan for his benefit, I couldn’t get into the moment.

My mind was still whirling around the meaning of the dream.

The Roman numerals haunted me.

Two? Why two?

***

A quiet morning glow trickled in from between the slits of my long burgundy curtains. Keanu’s hulking shadow maneuvered stealthily in the middle of my apartment as I dramatically draped my arm across the bed toward him. Exaggerating a pout, I pushed my bottom lip out as I watched him get dressed beside the bed. Noticing my distraught expression, he reached his hand to my face and stroked my cheek.

Adding a little color to my face with a touch of mascara, pink gloss and blush, I gave myself a quick smile as I thought of Keanu. He made me feel good, better than I’d felt in years. He made me feel wanted, a sensation that up until now had eluded me.

Grandmother would develop an odd, distant look in her eyes whenever I’d ask about the cave and how she found me. It always left me with a yearning to find out more.

The day I left for university, she sat me down and had a very strange discussion with me.

“Little one.” My grandmother began in her native tongue, enveloping my hands with her own. “The world can be very cruel, especially to outsiders.”

Rolling my eyes gently, I gave her a look that only a young, inexperienced girl can give. “I’ll be just fine. Don’t worry. I’m only going to school and besides, you taught me well.” Patting her hand, I tried to reassure what I considered to be over-bearing and paranoid behavior.

Her soft brown eyes searched my face, her years of wisdom etched into aged skin. Frowning, she left me with one last cryptic word of warning, “You are different Cassia…special. Don’t trust
anyone
.”

Her last words to me echoed in my mind as I left my apartment for my final guinea pig session at the medical department.

My breath made translucent clouds in the crisp morning air as I jogged lightly toward the east side of the university. Fall had settled on the Washington ground, leaving each blade of browning grass coated with tiny crystalline shards. The trees surrounding the campus each wore a white blanket of frost that clung to every branch and remnant leaf.

So beautiful.

I could feel my nose turning pink from the chilly air as I entered the front of the medical department. Rubbing my hands together and breathing warm air onto them as I approached the front desk, my body began to warm up.