Inner Guidance (28 page)

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One day, during my spiritual exercise, I saw inwardly that loved ones are never really apart. Whether we are alive in this physical world or not, we are never separated from those we love. The Mahanta showed me how we are together by a bond of love that keeps us linked.

So in my heart, I held my friend Debbie. I decided to focus on that. This comforted me, and I let go of my search.

Time passed. An opportunity developed for me to make a sizeable step up in service to Eckankar: I was asked to present a series of workshops in Colorado. This was exciting and inspiring to me; it was a chance to put into practice much of what I’d learned spiritually over the years as a student of the Eckankar teachings.

This was a volunteer position, and it would keep me very busy for about eighteen months. I wondered how I could put aside my work obligations. Would my husband pick up the slack?

He was in total accord. We decided to commit to this new project.

The venture was everything I thought it would be, and more. It was exciting, beautiful, challenging, and—

yes—also exhausting. One time on the way home from Colorado, I found myself crying on the plane. Another workshop had ended, and it had gone well; as ever, I was grateful and honored to be a part of it. But I was also tired from the months of planning and travel.

The flight attendant noticed the tears streaming down my cheeks. “Are you all right?” she gently asked.

I nodded yes. I had an entire row of seats to myself on this flight, so I just leaned against the window and gently sobbed. When the flight attendant kindly asked if she could get me anything, I shook my head and kept on crying.

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Inner Guidance: Our Divine Birthright

This was very unusual for me. In my gloom, I wondered if I had perhaps misheard my inner guidance.

Had I taken on this project not in true service, but for some mistaken sense of glory? Was I actually doing what I was supposed to be doing—for the greatest good of all?

“Did I do this for the wrong reason?” I asked the Inner Master. “Is this true service, and did I follow my inner guidance accurately, or go off course? Am I even supposed to be doing this?”

Sitting there, thirty thousand feet above the earth, I asked for guidance, direction, and answers. “Whatever the answer may be, Thy will be done,” I said.

Eventually, I managed to sleep.

“
W
ake up. I want to talk to you,” the voice said.

It seemed so real, but I was definitely dreaming.

Sitting beside me on the plane, so close I could reach out and touch him, was my spiritual guide, Sri Harold Klemp.

“I didn’t know you were on this flight,” I said. “I have some things I’d like to ask you.”

He nodded. “Yes, I want to talk to you too. All you need to do is continue in abiding love and service,” he said. “I will take care of the rest.”

Not wanting to miss a chance to ask my questions, I barely took in what he said.

“But am I fulfilling my spiritual goals, my life goals, and my purpose?” I asked.

“I know your goals,” Sri Harold told me. “I know even the ones you have forgotten.”

I was surprised. “What have I forgotten?”

He laughed at that. “Anne, all you need to do is continue in abiding love and service,” he repeated. “I will Inner Guidance_CH 22-27.p65

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Inner Guidance and Surrender

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take care of the rest.”

With that he was gone. I woke up.

His comment nagged at me: What had I forgotten?

Was it one of the details to be handled with this project?

I was careful to double-check everything, and I had wonderful assistance, but things could still slip through the cracks.

In a small journal I kept in my purse, I wrote his message: “All you need to do is continue in abiding love and service. I will take care of the rest.” From those words, I sensed that the Mahanta was encouraging me about the workshops. The Inner Master had convinced me that my service was coming from a true heart, and I could continue with confidence.

When I arrived at home that evening, I went to check my e-mail. There was a message from a Web site I had used years before in my search for my friend Debbie.

“Someone is looking for you” read the subject line.

A phone number was included with the message. I dialed it quickly. Debbie answered!

Her voice took me back through the years in a flood of love. “It’s Anne,” I managed to say. “I’ve been looking for you for years and years!”

“Me too,” she laughed. “I don’t know how we ever lost each other, but let’s not do that again.”

A
s I listened to my beloved friend’s voice, I heard the words from my dream on the plane: “I know your goals. I know even the ones you have forgotten.”

Now I was crying tears of joy. Finding Debbie had been a major goal for years; then I found it just too painful to continue. I had put it aside—surrendered this mission to Divine Spirit.

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Now, after so many years, after I stopped thinking about it every day, we’d found each other!

At our first meeting, we talked and laughed and caught up. As if we’d just left off yesterday, we picked up on conversations from almost thirty-five years before. Our shared history came together again like a jigsaw puzzle. What I had forgotten, she remembered.

All her questions, I could answer. We made plans to meet again as soon as possible.

Since then, Debbie and I have become a part of each other’s lives again in every way. We travel together and share adventures again. It is a great blessing for us to have found each other.

Sometimes gifts come not when we want them to come, not when we think they should come, but when we are ready for them. They are sometimes all the sweeter for the wait.

For me, the Spiritual Exercises of Eckankar are the key to an open heart that welcomes these gifts. The spiritual exercises keep my inner awareness observant and responsive. They are an important part of my path on this journey home to God. They help me choose love over power, listen to the inner guidance all around me, and trust where it may lead.

Every time I say, “Thy will be done,” and surrender to the greatest good for all, the ECK Masters—real and loving servants of God—help me take the next step home to God.

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Spiritual Healing

of Limited Beliefs:

From Inner Guidance to

Outer Abundance

If the dream teachings of ECK achieve anything, may it be to show people how the Holy Spirit
teaches through both Its inner and outer guidance. This lifetime is our spiritual laboratory.

—Harold Klemp

The Art of Spiritual Dreaming
37

I
n the dream, I was walking with the Mahanta, the Living ECK Master, Sri Harold Klemp.

Dressed in light-blue clothing, he moved easily across the flower-laden field in which we walked. He seemed to feel very comfortable with the land and apparently enjoyed long hikes in this glorious place. A profound sense of love and freedom emanated from this Master I knew as Wah Z. I felt blessed in his presence as he spoke to me of our true nature as Soul and the most direct way to return home to God.

“Will I be able to remember all this when I wake up?” I asked.

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Inner Guidance: Our Divine Birthright

He smiled but made no reply.

I knew this was one of those special dreams of spiritual experience and inner guidance that are clearer than life itself.

Everything around us was vivid. In front of me was a field that was stunningly picturesque—a carpet of grass and flowers, but remarkably different from anything I had ever seen.

Everything sparkled with a brilliance that I could hardly bear. Yet, inexplicably, it filled me with appre-hension and anxiety.

We strolled leisurely toward a subtle line in the grass, a fine line of demarcation. I could see it clearly.

Beyond this line, each blade of grass glistened even more, as if crowned with an exquisite, tiny emerald. The pistils and stamens within each little flower also gleamed with jeweled radiance—ruby-red or sapphire, topaz or diamond; or simply luminous—pearly and dusted with gold. Here was beauty and opulence beyond description!

Why was I so hesitant as I looked at this magnificent and wonderful sight? My inner guidance was nudging me forward, but I didn’t want to go. Some part of me was entirely resistant to the potential experience that lay ahead.

Stopping in my tracks, I looked to the Master and said, “I can go no further.”

“Is something wrong?” he inquired.

“I can’t go in there.” I pointed nervously to the landscape before us.

“Why do you feel that way?”

“If I go there, it will hold me back spiritually. That is the Land of Wealth!” I exclaimed.

“Does that bother you?” he softly asked.

“Of course it does!” I was surprised he didn’t seem Inner Guidance_CH 22-27.p65

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to be taking me seriously.

He laughed lightly. “Oh, yes, I remember when you had that idea about other things too.”

“What do you mean?”

He reminded me about my youth and beliefs I had held then—fears I had that God would be displeased with almost anything I might do.

“Foolish childhood ideas,” I insisted, “are not the same at all. This is serious.” It seemed entirely sensible to be concerned about anything that might hold me back spiritually.

Inner guidance told me not to be afraid, to have courage. Yet there was a fine line between courage and folly.

W
hile I was busy defending myself, the Inner Master placed his hand on the small of my back and gave me a little push. I stumbled slightly and stepped squarely into the Land of Wealth.

“You pushed me!” I protested.

“I guess I did,” he laughed. “You might as well continue with me now. I have some things I want to show you.”

Even in this dream, my inner guidance was working to teach me an important lesson. Something vital was about to happen. Though I still felt resistant, I was also curious to see what the Master had to show me.

“OK,” I muttered. “I can’t go back now anyway.”

Then my inner guidance reminded me, “You are walking with the Master! He will protect you from any snares and dangers that you might feel are lurking within this land.”

We wandered deeper into the dazzling landscape.

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I grew happier and lighter inside. Seeing this, the Master casually asked me, “Now, why were you so afraid that coming here would hold you back spiritually?”

In my mind, wealth and opulence seemed to signify sin and greed. I thought that was universally understood. Isn’t that what they said in church? “It is easier for a camel to go
through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.”

I halfheartedly argued my point, yet I actually longed to let go of this old belief. I had a good life, a good marriage, and wonderful spiritual experiences. But something was still lacking. It was as if limitations, or limiting beliefs I didn’t even know about, were running parts of my life.

I’d asked to be rid of these limitations. I wanted to be completely available in service to God. The Inner Master was helping me face this seemingly small but crippling concept. It was important that I become aware of its enormous consequences in my life.

A
s we passed over a gently sloping rise, I saw people participating in a variety of activities.

A group sat under a lovely weeping willow on a hillside. The tree shimmered as if tiny diamonds covered the length of its long, narrow leaves and the undersides gleamed with a hint of silver. The branches drooped down, almost touching the ground, and rustled in the gentle breeze. The tree stood near a lake with crystal-clear water that glimmered and glistened with flashes of turquoise blue. The scene was breathtaking.

The Mahanta moved me gently in the direction of a small gathering of people studying and discussing material from books. He indicated this little group and told me they were a Satsang, studying sacred teachings.

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A second group was painting and drawing landscapes as we walked near the lake. I marveled at the colors they used, and at their level of artistic mastery.

I felt my last bit of resistance slowly melting away, inspired and uplifted by the people and surroundings.

“Let’s go talk with some of these people. I want you to meet them,” the Master invited.

As we approached the gathering under the magnificent willow, I felt elated. The people welcomed me with great affection, calling me by name before I was even introduced. Several of them stood up and hugged me, expressing delight that I was able to visit them in this place.

When we left the group, I told Wah Z how surprised I was at the welcome I received. They were extraordinarily loving and friendly.

He raised an eyebrow and smiled as he told me,

“Perhaps you’re judged by the company you keep!” Then he laughed easily. I smiled as I grasped his humor. Yes, it was an endearing thing to say, but it also contained truth. Indeed, I was in good company.

Next, we walked by the brilliant blue lake. Just then, a group of people came ashore from a small boat.

They were all dressed in flowing white outfits, and several of them carried picnic baskets.