Instant Orgasm: Excitement at First Touch (30 page)

Figure 24.

Pressure on
perineum to
prevent ejaculation

peaks, and what you like to do between peaks. Be ready to feel that next first stroke. By practicing and observing how your body works, specifically with regard to peaking, you will gain an immense amount of knowledge that you can pass on to your partner.

•

In order to become the best possible giver of pleasure, you will have to incor- porate the art of peaking into your practice until it becomes second nature. It is all about your ability to stay focused and keep your attention on the pleasure that is occurring in your partner. You must be able to pick up on slight changes that signify a potential retreat, and then beat your partner to the punch by pulling the proverbial rug out from under them. Becoming proficient at peak- ing is often one of the last and most challenging parts of becoming a great lover. The information in this chapter, practiced regularly, gives you a good foundation for becoming just that.

c h a PT er 8

Closing Words

W

e have given you quite a bit of information in these pages. It will take some time for you to digest everything, put it all together, andcome

out as one of the best sexers in the world. You will have to do the work, practice what you have learned, and apply as much of the information as is feasible. Pursuing this knowledge has consumed (naturally very pleasurably) a good part of Vera’s and my life. This is the fourth book we have written on the subject of pleasure and orgasm, and each time we learn more. The information in our books, especially this one, is a culmination of all we have discovered. Our students and workshop attendees have

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cumulatively paid thousands of dollars to learn what we have imparted here for just the price of this book. You may learn more quickly if you were to come study with us, but with dedicated application of what you have read here, you can become a great sexer and sensualist.

A person could also use this information to start their own sensual-teach- ing practice. We are available for consultation to anyone who wishes to begin a business in sensual pleasure. There are very few places in the world where one can find appropriate facilitators for this kind of pleasure, especially women’s pleasure. We only know of teachers in California, New York City, and Hawaii. We would love for more people to have “hands-on” access to these techniques. A huge opportunity exists for those who are interested in making pleasure a priority and who wish to create a business from this work.

The title of our first book,
Extended Massive Orgasm,
appealed to some

people and created apprehension in others. We even received e-mails from a few feminist groups who, without having read our books, thought that we were placing performance pressure on women who had trouble reaching or- gasm. We apologize to these women because our intention was to create an easier and more gratifying way for women to experience pleasure. Our books are really all about that. Perhaps the name of the book seemed to promise too much, yet we are glad we were able to reach those who wanted to take their sensual lives to the next level. Hopefully the title of this book will have a dif- ferent effect and will attract women who believe they can learn to feel more sensual pleasure. We also want to attract readers whose orgasms are already wonderful but who want to take things even higher. We think we have accom- plished both.

Y Choose Pleasure Z

We want to touch once more on the importance of attitude in the creation of pleasure for yourself and your partner. One of the least hedonistic or sensual places in which to dwell is scarcity (Scare City). If you see signs pointing to Scare City, go in the opposite direction. In this mental place, opportunities and experiences that could be seen as gratifying and fun instead appear tor- turous and frightening.

Cl o s i n g Wo r d s

How can we get from scarcity to feeling more abundant and feeling good about ourselves? The answer lies in one’s attitude, in one’s appreciation of the small things that are constantly happening to us and around us. It is about be- ing more conscious, being aware, and focusing your attention on the present moment. It is about looking through the proverbial rose-colored glasses and seeing the proverbial glass as half full or more. It is about recognizing your surplus and giving it away. These all sound like the same attributes that we de- scribe in creating and experiencing IOs and EMOs. There is no coincidence here. In order to create pleasure, and in order to feel abundance and gratitude, a person must devote himself or herself to a mindset that will promote these qualities.

When we are focused on the future (what we will get or not get) or the past (what we have lacked or lost), we fall into that place of scarcity. The same goes for orgasm. We have to remain in present time and we have to appreciate what’s happening now to shift into extended pleasure. All it takes is switching one’s mindset, yet where is that switch, and how do we flip it?

It all goes back to embracing the viewpoint that the world is perfect the way it is. This perfection includes good, bad, and ugly. It involves seeing things as they are, not as you think they should be—as in some kind of utopia or some future heaven that awaits you. It is about right now, about what is. It is playing the cards that we are dealt and judging them to be the right cards no matter what. There is no throwing in the cards for new cards until you play your hand the way it was dealt. The only thing you can change is your atti- tude. When you change your attitude you can see things from a new perspec- tive. From wherever you are, there are always ways to lose and there are always ways to win.

Sexually speaking, the same is true. The pleasure is in you, not in who is doing it to you. Most people decide whether someone is good-looking and then assume that being touched by that attractive person would be wonder- ful. Or they assume that being touched by someone who looks “ugly” would be less exciting. We as human beings have the ability to get off fantastically no matter who is touching us, ourselves included. When we are out of agree- ment with things—when we judge the situation or our partner to be wrong— we limit ourselves with regard to the pleasure available. This is due to living in

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some other moment besides the present moment, either the past or the future. The ability to feel pleasure with any kind of touch comes with training and with the capacity to see the perfection in every circumstance.

This ability to be utterly in the “now” is the defining characteristic of sensuality. We all have this potential. As we described in the Introduction, throughout this book we have kept you in a perpetual state of arousal. We have practically left out any discussion of coming down. We purposely wanted you to stay focused on the pleasure of the first stroke and to continue receiving ev- ery stroke as if it were the only one. This is what we mean when we talk about being sensual: to feel every stroke and to be present to all of your pleasure po- tential.

A journey begins with the first step. We see lots of journeys in your future. If you wish to reach us in between any of your journeys, feel free to e-mail us at [email protected].

Frequently asked Questions