Instinctual (3 page)

Chapter Three

After slipping into a comatose sleep the evening before and having been out of it for around twelve hours solid, Kate awoke to the smells of Vernazza. Pizza cooking and coffee brewing. It was enough to cause her stomach to growl. After her health scare a week ago, there were no symptoms to remind her of the night that had scared the crap out of her. Maybe it had all been connected to her intuitive side. In that case, she dreaded to think that someone she possibly knew had undergone such horrendous agony.

Carlos had stayed the night, as he was due to leave on a business trip the next day.

At some late hour last night he must have snuck into bed beside her and cuddled in with his hand thrown across her side, which was where he still lay, breathing deeply, the blanket tossed down to his knees due to the warm night.

Not wanting to wake him, Kate carefully lifted the blanket off. She always managed to pull it up to her neck as security regardless of the temperature. She got up, tip-toeing into the living room in her favorite lace underwear, a gift from Carlos two weeks earlier. He liked her to wear sexy lingerie. Whenever he stayed over he got her to put some on. It normally ended with sex. He was good to her and she couldn’t fault his attentiveness or his commitment, but there was still something missing. Something Kate couldn’t quite put her finger on. Was it his temper? Was it the fact that she always thought he was keeping things from her? She felt guilty for thinking it but there was a little seed of niggling doubt that reared its silly little head from time to time. She couldn’t quite give her all to him. She was holding back. It was
those
feelings she probably should be paying more attention to. Sometimes she just wanted to be normal like everyone else. Because of that she tried so hard to ignore the uncomfortable forewarnings that constantly bombarded her.

She switched the light on and opened the doors from the living room onto the small balcony facing the street, being careful to stay hidden behind the curtains so that no one spotted her in the sexy underwear. Kate didn’t like to dress until she could languish in a hot shower for ages and plan her day out. Not that it mattered what she wore if she was spending the day at the computer working from home, but sometimes she liked to head out and eat at Mister Matioli’s café before throwing herself into writing articles. That way if she skipped lunch at least she knew she’d had a decent, hearty breakfast that would often keep her going until dinner.

As early as it was, the morning was already alive as shopkeepers opened their doors, erected their canopies, and filled their outside tables with tempting items, hoping to lure in prospective customers. Commuters locked up and walked to the nearby train station at the top of the hill and hungry patrons filed into cafés and restaurants, eager for their morning caffeine hit over breakfast. Kate beamed and took in a full breath, stretching her arms above her head. Her villa was just off the main street which led down to the piazza and small beach that also acted as a harbor. An ancient wall had been built as protection for the small accumulation of fishing boats that were moored there.

Just before turning to go into the kitchen and make a morning coffee, Carlos snuck up behind her, encircling her waist with one hand, pulling aside her hair to kiss her neck with the other. Kate jumped, still expecting him to be snoring heavily in the bedroom.

“Mmm. How’s my favorite woman?”

Kate grinned and turned her neck into the kiss. “Better now that you’re up.” She turned so that Carlos’ mouth had to leave her neck and find her mouth. She wound her hand around Carlos’ neck to pull him in closer, immediately feeling him respond. She smiled against his mouth as she realized just how much she affected him.

“What’s so amusing?” he asked, pulling back.

“Oh, nothing. I just like hugs and kisses first thing in the morning.”

“Really! Well, you know how I like to see you in those skimpy bits of fabric.” He gave her a wet kiss on the neck.

“Thanks for staying last night. It’s nice to have company.” Kate’s fingers brushed his cheek.

“Of course. I need to make sure you’re totally over your little episode last week.” His hand mauled Kate’s breast. He leaned in to kiss her but she lightly pushed him back.

“I’ll be fine, don’t worry. I’ve got more than enough work to keep me busy and out of trouble today. I haven’t had any more pain, so whatever it was has long gone. You need to focus on your business trip tomorrow.”

He took a step back, grabbing his neck with one hand. “Okay. If you’re sure.” He looked to the ground. Kate tried to place his sudden mood change. She could feel a sliver of guilt pass though her. Was it Carlos’ guilt? Was he keeping something from her?

“I have an article I need to finish which should take me well into the night. How about you? Are you packing for your trip?”

Just ever so slightly Kate saw Carlos flinch before smiling and nodding. “Yes, sweetheart, and I’ve got to get all my paperwork in order. Make sure I’ve rehearsed my sales pitch, stuff like that.”

Kate watched his face redden as he spoke but she let it go. It was probably just stress about having to leave her on her own again after having been together all week.

“Fancy a coffee?” Kate needed to change Carlos’ mood in order to lift her own. She closed the gap.

“You know I would.” He watched her approach and licked his lips.

As she put a light kiss on his mouth, a vivid image blinded her. Hormones raged. A sexual urge hit hard. A feeling she hadn’t had since… Oh God! She swayed, almost falling over.

“What is it?” Carlos tried to grab both her arms but she shrugged him off, letting herself feel the sensations in her body. Charges of energy pulsed through her veins. Amazing currents of desire that had no connection whatsoever to the man that stood in front of her. It was incredibly naughty but she held onto the feelings just for a second, letting herself surrender, closing her eyes, returning to a place she swore she’d never go back to. Time stopped in that one instant and she was transported to another part of Vernazza. Hair shorter. Face glowing. Body riper. She was a woman in love. Truly, painstakingly in love, oblivious to anything but the warm, toned, athletic body lying next to her, his fingers tenderly tracing the outline of her face with hands so strong. Hands inscribed into every sensory part of her body.

Kate’s heart became erratic. Fingers clammy. Overpowering thoughts that had been pushed down for so long erupted forth. She was back in time.
His
energy was with her: In her. Filling her. His lean torso sizzling against her aching body, dazzling blue eyes burning, searing into her soul. A touch like a hot poker. Branding her as if to be his forever. She had been his. Totally. One hundred percent. Until—

“Kate!”

“Mmm?”

“What’s wrong? Is your chest sore again?” Carlos’ voice was high pitched with panic.

Kate could see him start to come unhinged again.

“He’s here!” It was out before she could stop it. Shit! Jake was here! She knew it as the absolute truth. His very essence was connecting with her again after all this time, overwhelming her body with scorching want.

“Who? Who’s here?” He strode over to her and grabbed both her arms. Hard.

Gazing at the man she’d been dating for the last three months, he suddenly appeared a stranger.

“Nothing. I thought I heard Marco next door, that’s all.” So, it was just a little white lie and it was a weak one at that. It’s not like she did it all the time. No harm done, right? What he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. Kate had never told Carlos about her intuitive side. Like her father, Carlos wasn’t the type to believe in that sort of thing. He was a straight shooter. Told it like it was.

She could imagine his reaction if she casually mentioned to her new lover that an ex-boyfriend was invading her thoughts and had arrived in Vernazza. Not only that but it was making her unbelievably ignited with need that had nothing to do with the present and everything to do with the past. She’d never, ever been able to even feel remotely close to feeling what she felt with Jake with Carlos. That would go down really well. Not. The reality of the situation held Kate tight in its grip. She felt her face heat up as her hands started to shake.

She seriously needed to forget about Jake! He’d proved his worth by walking out and leaving her only half a person. For weeks Kate couldn’t go outside and face the world. She couldn’t eat or sleep. All she could think about was the hurt that had billowed through the door as he’d walked into the night. No word. Nothing. No note saying how sorry he was or that he just needed to have some space. What sort of a person did that?

The words “We can’t be together anymore and I’m leaving tonight,” played like some haunted melody in her mind. It was as if Jake leaving had severed any connection she had to him. Not even her gift had given her answers. There had been nothing. Until now.

Even as she tried to steady herself and move to the chair in the sitting room of the small villa, Kate felt
him
trying to connect with her, powerfully against her will.

Just in time, Carlos cushioned her fall with his strong, virile hands as darkness pulled a curtain across her consciousness.

Ten minutes later she found herself tucked up in bed again, her head just poking out, Carlos sitting on the edge, his face pinched.

“You’re not pregnant, are you?”

“What?”

“You are on some sort of birth control, right?” His eyes were riveted on hers.

“Yes! Of course! Why would you ask that?” Okay now he was starting to piss her off.

He seemed to let out a sigh of relief. “Well, don’t pregnant women normally faint and have dizzy spells early on?”

Ugh. Kate covered her face with her hands, not able to process
that
dreadful thought.

“I’m not pregnant!” she almost yelled, pulling her hands away from her face.

“All right then, so why did you pass out?”

“I don’t know.” Liar, liar pants on fire! She knew what had caused her dizziness. Or more to the point, whom. It didn’t bear thinking of. Not now. Not ever. Desperate not to let on to Carlos, she plastered a smile on her face. He couldn’t find out.

“Maybe you’re coming down with something. I think you need to visit the doctor. Find out what’s going on.”

His cell chimed out two loud beeps, signaling a text. He pulled it from his shirt pocket and read it while Kate spoke.

“Honey, I’m so thankful that you were there to catch me, as you always are. I’m really feeling so much better. I’ve been working so hard lately I think it’s all catching up to me. Maybe I need a few days off. Why don’t you go on home and take care of your business. I’ll make an appointment and go this afternoon. Don’t worry.” She had no intention of seeing a doctor. She wasn’t sick.

Another lie. She hated doing it. She hated it with a passion. Her intuition told her that passing out wasn’t due to anything other than the arrival of a certain someone in Vernazza. Jake Alexander was the only one who could affect her in such a way.

“Well, if you say so.” He tucked his cell back into his pocket, looking at her finally.

“I’m fine. I’ll have a shower and get breakfast as soon as you leave and then I’ll phone the doctor. Now scoot so I can fill my empty tummy.”

Carlos leaned over and kissed her chastely, appearing to buy into the lie before he stood.

He grabbed his jacket and bag, which both sat up against the far wall. “Be good while I’m gone and call me if you need me. I’ll contact you later to see how you are.” Blowing her a kiss, he left quietly.

Kate watched him leave, suddenly insecure about her actual feelings for Carlos. God! It was all so complicated. She liked him but she was starting to wonder if they were really suited. Over the last week, he’d shown a side of himself that made her uneasy. Something was niggling like a worm and it wouldn’t go away.

Lying alone on the comfortable bed, her thoughts turned to someone else.

She pulled the quilt higher just like her mother used to do when she was little. Right now, she needed the security it brought. Her head sank back into the feather pillow.

“Where are you, Jake? What are you trying to do? Please stop. I can’t go through it all again. I’m stronger now. I won’t let you get close to me again.” Her eyes closed.

Defiant of the pledge and as if separate from her body, her mind was lost to memories she’d fought to contain.

“You do things to me, Kate, that I’ve never felt before. Your very presence drives me mad with longing. When I look into your eyes I see you. I really see you. It’s more than lust. It’s more than love. It’s bigger than both of us.” His hand fisted in the back of her hair as his full lips crushed hers, not asking but taking, driving her to the edge.

“Ooooh, Jake!” The force of his mouth on hers left no room for anything else. This man that had stolen her heart with such speed and vigor was the other half of her. He was her world. Her lips felt bruised as she clung to him, needing more. There was no start and no end to them. His body felt an extension of hers.