Into the Woods (70 page)

Gut tense, she began to turn away. “I’ll get him for both of us.”

“I know. Shut the door on your way out, will you?”

She felt sick. Numb, she turned to the door and left, shutting the door softly. Leaning against it, she closed her eyes and tried not to cry. Seeing him like this was hard. He wasn’t a caffeine addict. He wasn’t! What was she going to do? She didn’t want another partner, and to work alone was not accepted.

“I’m sorry.”

Her eyes opened, finding Jason waiting for her across the hall with Hoc. Frustrated, she pushed herself up. “He is not a booster,” she said, keeping her voice down lest Boyd hear her. “Everyone does caffeine once in a while.”

“You don’t.”

No, she didn’t. Not since burning her family’s house down when she was sixteen.

Memories of double funerals, of her grandmother steadfastly holding her hand, never blaming and always defending her, hiding her for another year as she rebuilt her life on the framework of guilt and duty.

“Grace, we’ve been monitoring him for the last eleven months. It was his decision to do this. He turned himself in.”

“After you told him you already knew, right?” she snapped, clicking her tongue against her teeth for Hoc as she strode back down the hall.

Jason’s feet were loud in his insulating boots as he stomped to catch up. “Why are you mad at me? This wasn’t
my
idea.”

“I don’t have anyone else to be mad at. God, I’m hungry.”

“Good.” She jerked as he took her arm, but he didn’t let go. “I’m ready for a second breakfast myself.”

Sick at heart, she couldn’t find it in her to keep tugging away from him. Jason hadn’t left her. She had left him. “Since when do you eat a second breakfast?”

Sensing a shift, he smiled. “Since I’ve been brushing up on my joint-operative techniques.”

He had something to tell her. She could tell. Hoc, too, knew something was up, and he padded along, waving his tail happily with his two favorite people beside him as the hall became busy.

“You’ve been working on joint-operative techniques?” she said, looking askance at him as they walked down the hallway, seeing more people the closer they got to the commissary. “Are you taking a demotion?”

“Not exactly, no,” he hedged. “It’s no secret that you’re our best collector in a six-state area, maybe the entire US. The Strand is very interested in you bringing Zach in, especially now. They’re impressed with his ability and rudimentary control, and they’re not willing to let him go free and you to sit idle for the time it takes to become comfortable working with another operative. As Boyd said, we’ve worked together before. I’ve been given leave to help you collect him.”

Her eyebrows rose as he opened the big plate-glass doors to the commissary for her and the smell of starch, fat-slap, and fresh bread rolled out, making her even more hungry. It was noisy with the chatter of people, both professionals who worked at the hospital, patients like herself up and around, and even a few uniforms matching Jason’s from upstairs where the elite’s bosses had their offices. Throws were a close-knit group, and the room was warm and bright with humanity, but she couldn’t help the tiny feeling of warning trickling through her.

She might be the Strand’s top collector in the field, but Jason was one of their best covert agents. Why would they let him go to help her bring in an unregistered throw, powerful or otherwise? True, she’d worked with him before, but there had been complications. That’s why she’d requested a new partner, one old enough to be her father.

Jason handed her a tray, his hand on the small of her back as he guided her to the line. “Well, don’t get so excited, Grace,” he said sourly. “You might set your balance off.”

She licked her lips, remembering the two years they had shared an apartment, a life. “Jason, I appreciate the offer, but us working together might not be such a good idea. I can get Zach on my own. We understand each other.”

“Yes, I see that,” Jason muttered as he reached in front of her, setting a bowl of onion soup on her tray, following it up with four pieces of bread. “I thought we did good together. Here. You’re going to need this.”

She flushed. “I can’t burn through that many calories in one day,” she said, even as her stomach growled.

“You will today,” he said cryptically, and then, as if unable to contain himself any longer, he blurted, “Grace, Zach is the oldest unregistered throw found since you were collected at seventeen. We know throws who mature naturally like you and Zach are substantially stronger, but their control usually sucks and we have to deadhead them to remove their abilities. Zach is the exception, like you, and if you can successfully bring him in and convince him to work within the Strand’s framework, I think you might get that promotion to the elite you’ve been looking for.”

She turned, her heart pounding. The elite? It was what she wanted. What she had aimed for since entering the Strand, welcoming the peace and order it represented.

Seeing her understanding, he nodded, beaming as he put an extra large orange juice on her tray. “Move down, will you? I can’t reach those meat tarts. It’s high time you joined the elite. Overdue if you ask me. Your skills are top-notch, and control unquestioned. If you wouldn’t do stupid stunts like almost killing yourself to save a dog, you’d probably be my superior by now.”

Grace stopped, her feet becoming one with the floor.
Stupid stunts? Saving my dog is a
stupid
stunt?

“We’ve got a busy day, you and me,” he was saying as he filled his own tray. “I’ve already been over Zach’s paperwork, but I think it would be prudent to do a few team-building exercises to be sure we can modulate easily before we go out. Since you’ve been in contact with him before, I might be the better choice for going in vanguard, but it’s your call.”

Her call? Her eyes narrowed. “Saving my dog was not a stupid stunt,” she said, conscious that the conversations at the nearby tables had gone silent. “Hoc is my partner as much as Boyd was. Is.”

The lights over the food flickered. Jason noted it, frowning. “This is your last chance at getting into the elite, Grace. I’m doing you a favor.”

Ticked, she shoved the tray at him, and he took it, stumbling. “I don’t need your favors. See you around.”

There was a clatter as he put her tray next to his on the counter. “I don’t understand you,” he said loudly. “I’m giving you a chance to prove yourself. You’re not young anymore, Grace. No one over twenty-five has ever been admitted to the elite. Don’t you want to do something important with your life?”

Grace stopped. Hoc stood at her heel, the dog cowering as if she’d yelled him. She wanted a chance to prove herself so bad that she could taste it, but she wanted to earn it on her own merits, not buy it with a lie. Part of her job as a collector was evaluating a throw’s moral makeup, her words counting heavily on the question of whether an older, unregistered throw should be trained or have his or her abilities burned out of him or her for the safety of society. Zach was powerful, yes, and control could be learned, but she feared he had no sense of duty to himself or those he loved, that he would take what they taught him and use it for his own gain.

If she collected Zach and passed him into the Strand at the will of the elite, it would assure her place among them. If she decided he was unrecoverable and advised him to be deadheaded, she would lose her last chance to become what she most wanted.

“I
am
doing something important,” she said, every eye in the room on her. “Working with Boyd was not a
mistake
. Saving Hoc was not a
mistake.
That dog is my partner, more than you’ll ever be.”

The lights flickered overhead. Still standing where she’d left him, he crossed his arms over his chest. People were fidgeting, their own balances being pulled out of whack. “Your emotions are betraying you.”

Not even looking at her monitor, she stomped back over to him. His face lost all expression and he loosened his arms, but all she did was push her sleeve up and shove her wrist under his nose. “My balance is perfect,” she said softly. “Maybe you should try wearing one of these yourself.”

Her tone was bitter, and his face softened, even as he glanced at it. “Don’t walk away from me. If you don’t do this, you’ll be bringing in unregistered throws the rest of your life.”

“It’s what I’m good at,” she said bitterly, seeing the awful choice he had given her. “You can take your elitist job and shove it,” she said, trembling. “I’d rather work alone with dogs than with your pack of overgrown boys who think the rules don’t apply to them.”

He reached for her, and she backed away at the anger in his expression. Spinning on a heel, she walked out, pace fast and Hoc at her side.

“Grace!” he shouted as she pulled the door open, feeling the weight of it all the way to her bones.

She let the door slam, reaching out and snapping the electricity flow like a rubber band. A startled cry rose up from a handful of people, and the lights went out.

She’d done it intentionally, and her balance, she noted bitterly, was perfect—even if her insides were churning like storm waters.

She could lie and be rewarded, or be truthful and remain where she was, and it pissed her off that she was even tempted.

THREE

G
race found herself listening for Boyd’s footsteps as she reluctantly walked up the cobbled walk to the peaceful slice of suburbia hiding its shame and misery behind lush green lawns and environmentally friendly recycle bins. Behind her, Hoc whined through the open window, the obedient dog staying where she told him. He was not coming in until she knew Zach wasn’t there. It felt odd without her partner, and her arms swung stiffly. She wished that Boyd would be coming back from the Island, but once you started to boost, you came to depend on it—making it a hundred times harder to maintain your balance. That Zach wasn’t an addict already was a miracle. But then again, if he had been, they would have found him a lot sooner.

Grace pushed the doorbell, hearing it ring. She was angry at Boyd for being weak, angry at Jason for his choice that wasn’t one, but most of all she was disillusioned by the Strand’s policies. If by some miracle Zach was morally suited for great power, her choice would be easy, but after nearly half a decade of bringing in older unregistered throws, she knew the chances were almost nil. There was a reason the Strand worked hard to find throws in kindergarten. Morality was best taught early.

Brainwashed?
she wondered as she listened to the footsteps approach. Perhaps, but the alternative was allowing a small but powerful demographic of people to abuse the rest until the majority rebelled, killing them all, the good along with the bad.

Hearing the steps behind the door falter, Grace rang the bell again, tired.

“I told you he’s not here. Go away!” Mrs. Thomson shouted through the door, and Grace pulled herself straight.

She had to try. Maybe Zach was the exception. “Mrs. Thomson? Please, I just want to talk.”

“I said go away!” the frustrated woman all but screamed, making Grace even more tired.

“Zach put my partner in the hospital. He’s okay. I thought you might want to know.” She hesitated, motioning Hoc to stay where he was, and the dog’s ears drooped. “I know Zach’s a good boy,” she said, hoping it was true. “He reminds me of me when I was found. It was hell.”

Uneasy, she tugged her uniform straight as she turned to face the street. “I want to help Zach,” she said, feeling a twinge of doubt and guilt. “I’m sorry, Mrs. Thomson. It’s going to go harder on him if I can’t bring him in today. The next people coming out here will . . . not be understanding.”

Depressed, she took a step down, Hoc’s tail waving as the door cracked open behind her. Grace didn’t smile. She’d come out here hoping to find that Zach was morally sound, but a part of her wanted the boy to rot in hell for trying to kill her dog.

“Someone was here already this morning,” Mrs. Thomson said, her voice trembling, and Grace turned.

“Here? Already?” she said, and the scared woman opened the door a little more.

“A sandy-haired man. Your age, your height. Thin, like my Zach. He was alone, but I knew it was one of you. His coat had silver in it and his hat had a triton on it.”

“Jason?”

Hoc whined at hearing the man’s name, and the woman came halfway out onto the shady porch. “He said his name was Stanton.”

Grace turned all the way around. Jason. She glanced back at her car, a hundred options going through her mind. “Can I come in?” she asked, and the woman withdrew, her head down. “Mrs. Thomson, you don’t want Jason to bring your son in. He’s a lying bastard.” Not to mention he would pass him into the Strand for the promotion.

“There is nothing wrong with my son!” the woman said, then dropped her eyes again.

Nodding her agreement, Grace crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back against the post holding up the porch’s roof. “My grandmother realized what I could do when I was three,” Grace said softly, her voice distant in memory. “Ten years after the poles flipped and everything fell apart. She said there was nothing wrong with me, too. She gave me a big girl’s watch for my birthday that year. It was a secret between us. Even my mom and dad didn’t know. I broke it the first fifteen minutes I had it on, and she gave me another just like it to hide what I’d done.”

Grace looked down at her far more complicated timepiece, smiling as she remembered. Her grandmother was one smart woman. “That second watch lasted three days, and she gave me another. By the end of the month, I wasn’t breaking them anymore, just slowing them down. It helped, finding that control. Having a secret. I loved my grandma. Still do.”

Guilt tightened her jaw, and she shoved the memory of casseroles and well-meaning neighbors away. “I watched three kids make a lightbulb glow the following year in prekindergarten,” she said. “The teachers made it into a game. Made the kids who could do it feel special. They couldn’t make the bulb glow the next year after summer vacation.”

She turned back to the house, seeing that the woman was listening. They didn’t use the lightbulb test anymore. Too many kids like her had been coached to feign ignorance. “My mom might have guessed. My dad, probably not. I don’t know. They died when I was sixteen.” Her hands fisted, and she forced them to open. It was the year before she’d been collected.